Etiquette and Pushy Teenaged Girls

By the 1950’s, the novel automobiles and telephones from a short 70 years earlier had entered everyone’s homes and garages. At about that same time, the chaperones of young women had long exited the scene in most of the United States. It became more and more common for assertive young women to call young men on the phone and they began reversing the traditional, acceptable roles and doing the pursuing. But at what point did teenaged girls make the leap from being assertive and outgoing socially,  to being aggressive and rude? It was a quick evolution from women entering the work force en masse, to take traditionally male jobs in WWII, to the slow simmering of the roots of the Women’s Liberation Movement. Below is a prime example of what one modern teenaged girl had become by the end of the 1950’s.

DEAR DOROTHY DIX: Was I born 30 years too soon? Our 18-year-old son has been going steady with a 17-year-old girl for the past year. The young lady in question comes to our home looking for him when he's not at her house, she calls him to take her to school or on other errands, and even asked to accompany us on our vacation this summer. Her mother seems to encourage her aggressive attitude. I wonder whether common courtesy has died? I've always enjoyed having our children's friends in our home but this young lady seems to be a problem. – Worried Mother 

DEAR MOM: You've undoubtedly been told a hundred times that "times have changed since you were young," "things aren't done like that any more," etc... We'll all agree that times have changed but the qualities underlying common courtesy and graciousness have not changed. Your son's girl friend is a brash young thing, who has never been taught mannerliness and will never develop into a gracious and charming woman. 

She has the instinct of a savage she must get her man at any price and hold him against all comers. The best protection you can give your son against this predatory female is to show him, by example, that this is not the way girls behave. Your daughters can help. Maybe the girl will absorb some of your charm; she certainly isn't learning any from her own mother. And for your comfort, may I offer the suggestion that most teen-age romances are passing fancies. – Dorothy Dix, 1958

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia