Basic Formal Place Setting Etiquette

The above diagram is from a pamphlet published by the Gorham Company, called, “How to Coordinate Sterling, China, and Crystal.” It was republished in the book, “Silver Flatware Dictionary”

 

Correct usage today, as pertains to dinner table settings, is primarily a rule of thumb: set your table according to what you are serving, how you are serving it, and how formal or informal you wish your dinner party to be. Your selection of place pieces can be as large and elaborate as your budget and your menu and your taste will allow, or as simple and informal as your life style directs.

A Formal Dinner place setting as shown by the diagram: Forks, to the left of the plate with Knives to the right of the plate. Note that there are no spoons nor a spreader. A Cocktail Fork is an optional piece, and if used, should be placed to the right of the knife on the far right, as would be the optional Soup Spoon or Teaspoon. These pieces should be placed in accordance with their usage during the course of the meal.

A special occasion still calls, occasionally, for a formal dinner, and allows one to use one's very best china, silver, crystal, and linen together with all the elegant accoutrements particular to a memorable occurrence. Since a formal dinner demands more courses, and there are traditional inviolable ground rules governing the presentation of such an event, the table setting should follow accordingly. In the diagram, the place setting shows a Luncheon Fork, Dinner Fork, Salad Fork, Dinner Knife and Luncheon Knife. Luncheon size pieces are used for a first course, and could be used in conjunction with, or as a substitute for, a Fish Fork and Fish Knife, or Game Fork and Game Knife, depending on the number and/or kind of courses served. Soup Spoons and Teaspoons are optional pieces, as is the Cocktail Fork, again depending on the courses offered.

The folded napkin is placed on the service plate, and the buttered roll, directly on the table above the Salad Fork. Dessert Silver is brought in with the dessert.

Silver should be set at each setting precisely 1 - 1/2" from the edge of the table and 1" apart from each other (use a ruler for best results). Glasses are set in a prescribed pattern: water goblet above the Dinner Knife, Red Wine to the right, and above, the White Wine and are removed together with the accompanying china and silver service at the completion of each course.

In England, all the silver used is present and in addition, the Salad Plate and the Bread-and-Butter Plate with a Butter Spreader is used. In France and Italy, as in most other Continental countries, it is the custom to place the silver face down, thus explaining the beautiful designs on the reverse of European silver.

A Formal Dinner can be an elegant theater for the host and hostess who wish to present their finest table furnishings, superb cuisine, impeccable service and unique ambiance to their most cherished friends. – From the book, “Silver Flatware Dictionary,” by Richard F. Osterberg and Betty Smith, 1981

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquipedia Q and A Correspondence

To satisfy an anxious appetite if the dinner is taking too long. Not for very formal meals, however.

At Etiquipedia, we often get asked questions via Twitter and Instagram. Every so often, we will post one of our favorite questions we have received on social media, along with the answer. The following was a great question from last month:

Question: I teach etiquette to children, adults and corporate. It’s my passion and I feel I am contributing to society. I have had a question for a long time and perhaps you can help:

Is the bread plate ever optional? I have been learning different things and although I grew up with an English grandmother, that part is not clear yet.

I appreciate it very much. You are really the one knowledgeable person on etiquette who I can fully trust.

Answer: The bread plate is always optional. In many countries and cultures, there is no bread plate. And in the United States, if it’s a formal dinner, bread plates should not be part of the place settings at all.

Bread or a “dinner roll” was something that was placed at the table for each guest when early ovens and stoves, which had replaced open fire cooking, were still very unpredictable and unreliable.

You can imagine how difficult it would be to have a large group of people for dinner, if your cook could not manage timing everything properly with a stove or oven, which was unreliable.

A bread or roll would help satisfy the appetite briefly, while the dinner was being finished. It was a very common problem as stoves and ovens were being slowly introduced into people’s homes. 

A formal dinner served in a grand home, meant that the kitchen was most likely outfitted with the newest and most modern of kitchen “appliances.” Several people would be on hand to assist the chef or cook in creating the meal. The first wood-burning stove in the White House, for example, was installed in 1801 by Thomas Jefferson. It replaced an open fire for cooking.

By the gilded age, a very formal dinner in such a grand home would not require bread plates, though those with old money, probably still did include a roll in the napkin at their formal tables, simply out of tradition. It was included in most Etiquette books as being correct, but there was no bread plate mentioned. Most people with “old money” placed their bread on the tablecloth to the left of the plate, after removing it from the napkin.

A bread, or a roll became common place at place settings in homes and in restaurants. For a brief while, there were matching bread plates and butter plates, or “butter pats,” being manufactured and sold. Those were most often used in restaurants, however, and more middle-class homes. In the more modest homes, bread was still a large part of the meal, as it was inexpensive to make, and again helped stave off an impatient appetite.

Bread plates were a bit of a novelty over in Europe and England, as bread was usually set on the table. Queen Victoria popularized having a loaf of bread at the table with a large knife for cutting. Side plates are commonly used in England, but they are for a variety of foods. Crescent plates are British in origin, though they were not created for bread.

Crescent plates were created for salads originally. And that is how Queen Elizabeth II used hers at her coronation luncheon. The salad was served above her luncheon plate. Smaller versions became popular here in the United States for a time, and people were using crescent plates here for bread, or they were most often using them as “bone” plates; plates for depositing bones, shrimp tails, etc…

As stoves and ovens became much more reliable during the early part of the 20th century, it was determined that bread was no longer a necessity at a formal meal. Thus, there was no real need for a bread plate, especially at the dinner table.

Henceforth a dinner roll was no longer required at a formal dinner, as courses were expected to be served on time. That has made bread plates unwanted at formal place settings, and optional at informal dinners.

I think it’s completely up to the host or hostess, whether or not they wish to have a bread plate at their place settings. At large family dinners, because my Italian side of the family expects bread at the table, I’ll go ahead and place bread plates out.

If I’m giving a nine course formal etiquette dinner seminar, I have the bread plates, too. But those are for instructional purposes only, as I’m giving instructions on how to eat a roll and butter properly. I do give a history of bread at the table, however, and let guests know that this would not be the norm at a formal multi-course dinner.

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette… the Hostess’s Bugbear

The idea that failure to do either one thing or the other marks one as unversed in the ways of society, is ridiculous. Ease of manner is the real mark of good breeding. If one is afraid to do the natural thing, ease of manner is impossible.

ETIQUETTE has become the bugbear of the hostess. It has been written about and talked about so much that it overshadows the delight of ordinary social intercourse. “Shall I do this?” “Shall I do that?” are the constant queries of people who have hitherto been entirely happy and correct in doing the natural thing. Of course, there are certain customs of good society that we all want to be conversant with; but etiquette is another word for usage, and usage is built up on good sense and good manners.

“Should I pick up a spoon that falls from the dinner table?” asks one harassed inquirer. “Why not?” is the answer. If there are servants at hand who can do it for you, or the spoon is not perfectly clean, or it has rolled to such a position that it would cause a diversion to grope for it, one's good sense bids it lie. But if it is within easy reach and the impulse is to pick it up, then do it. The idea that failure to do either one thing or the other marks one as unversed in the ways of society, is ridiculous. Ease of manner is the real mark of good breeding. If one is afraid to do the natural thing, ease of manner is impossible.

Entertaining, of course, offers its own special problems, but the hostess' greatest asset is a sense of hospitality and enjoyment of her guests. To be surrounded with things that are beautiful and charming is the desire of most people. If our surroundings are right and we endeavor to be as natural as possible, entertaining becomes a comparatively simple matter. It is essential, however, that the surroundings be right, and a hostess’ real necessity for perfect entertaining is correct service that is, charming linen, good china, and the best and most complete silverware equipment she can afford.

It is not always possible for the girl starting housekeeping to have all the silverware she would like, neither is it always wise for her to try. There is a danger that she will be tempted to buy inferior ware and make up in quantity what she lacks in quality. Each year, however, the service should be added to; for while the world may look leniently on the shortcomings in the service of the bride, it expects the hostess of standing to entertain with dignity and distinction.— From “ Etiquette, Entertaining and Good Sense,” 1923

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Flatware for Informal Place Settings

 

“A few of the people you'll meet at every party. It will pay you to get along with them.” — It will also pay to know their names and primary uses so that you can easily “read” your place settings at luncheons and dinner parties.

Informal Place Setting Diagram —Only a luncheon or a very informal dinner setting will feature a cup, saucer and teaspoon. At formal dinner parties, coffee or tea are served away from the dining table. The service for coffee, tea or after dinner liqueurs, is brought out after the meal and usually served away from the table.

Eating is the one social activity common to everyone around the globe, but eating and dining are two different things. Practice dining when you are not in public and it will help you to avoid merely eating when among others.

“Table manners grew out of the fact that unless he is eating in a room empty of all but himself, a man eats in company and food is less appetizing if the other fellow's table manners are sloppy and disgusting. It matters little what sort of food is being served, whether the table is loaded with priceless silver and china or tin and graniteware; the simplest meal is made more attractive by the use of good table etiquette.”— From “Manners for Moderns,” 1938

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Dining Implements, Etiquette and More

“Here’s something your mother probably never warned you about: sauce knives. Looking like a flattened-out spoon, this tricky little utensil— also called a sauce spoon— sits with other knives on the right side of the plate, in wait to help drizzle sauce on, say, a bite of salmon that you’ve secured on your fish fork.” — Photo, Etiquipedia’s private library

The Ware and Tear of Formal Dining

Here’s something your mother probably never warned you about: sauce knives. Looking like a flattened-out spoon, this tricky little utensil— also called a sauce spoon— sits with other knives on the right side of the plate, in wait to help drizzle sauce on, say, a bite of salmon that you’ve secured on your fish fork.

If you can’t tell a fish fork from a pitchfork, take comfort in the fact that even the most cultured among us occasionally get flummoxed by an elegant table setting.

“Escargot clamps can be very challenging,” says Sean Loeffel, director of food and beverage at the Four Seasons Hotel, recalling the scene in “Pretty Woman” in which Julia Roberts accidentally catapults a garlicky mollusk across the room.

“I haven’t used an escargot clamp in probably 15 years,” he admits, “and I suspect there are many diners who would not be familiar with how to use it.”

Fortunately, even if you’re sitting down to a nine-course meal, you’ll probably only have to negotiate three courses’ worth of knives, forks and spoons at a time.

“Nine courses of silverware would be frightening, even for the most educated,” says Loeffel. “It also wouldn’t fit on the table. As a general rule, in order not to confuse the guest, servers never put out more than three courses of tableware at a time.”

Even so, as you sit down for that nine-course fete for, say, the queen mother herself, prepare to work your way through some 19 pieces of silverware over the course of the evening— or afternoon, when, according to the Tiffany sterling flatware catalog, you might come upon the afternoon teaspoon, as distinct from the teaspoon, ice cream spoon or coffee spoon.

But wait, there’s more. Those 19 pieces don’t include all the serving silverware shined up to parade past your table. Tiffany lists knives (cheese, bread, butter, cake), spoons (berry, sugar, salt, jelly, vegetable) and forks (lemon, olive and cold meat). Also making an appearance: ladles (gravy, punch and sauce), tongs (sugar, ice, asparagus), servers (flat, cheese, cake and butter) and possibly scissors (for grapes).

“Some chefs have a cunning sense of humor,” says Loeffel, who learned forks and spoons from his parents, who’d take him and his nine siblings out to breakfast— the least expensive restaurant meal— in order to teach table manners. “You’ll have a course where normally you’d use a knife and fork, and now some chefs are starting to serve a spoon with it as well, so the guest doesn’t miss out on the leftover sauce.”

And how would you know to use a spoon with your sauce? When in doubt, watch your host, says Loeffel. “We just did a luncheon where we served a coupe dish [that’s a sort of football-shaped, high-sided bowl for foods with hot sauces] and a spoon with it,” he says. “Everyone had their eye on the host so they knew what to do.”

In addition to keeping an eye on your host, other rules of culinary propriety include:

Work from the outside in. What your mother did tell you about silverware still applies. Start with the outside utensil and work your way in. The most common mistake is for diners to get rattled by the number of pieces of flatware and reach instinctively for the utensil closest to the plate. Don’t worry about the forks and spoons placed above your plate. They’re for dessert.

Knives and forks dine together. Even those secure in the knowledge that one should work from the outside in may still find it disconcerting to see seven pieces of silverware at their command. Know that for every fork at your place setting, you’ll also have a corresponding knife to your right. The spoon with the round bowl is most likely for soup (there are, however, different kinds of spoons depending on whether you’re served a cream soup [larger spoon] or bouillon). Pasta is often served with a fork and spoon to work that angel hair into a manageable bite.

Although Loeffel was brought up in the American style of putting the knife down and switching the fork to the right hand after cutting a piece of food, he says it is more correct to hold the knife and fork at the same time, one in each hand, as the Europeans do. “It makes more sense,” he says.

When you’re done with a course, place the knife and fork, handles facing out, at the 3 o’clock position on your plate. This will tell the server that you have finished eating.

Covet not thy neighbor’s bread plate. Or water glass. Or coffee cup. The bread plate is always to the left of a place setting. Glassware— water, wine, coffee cups and saucers— is always to the right.

According to Jill Cross, director of catering for the Beverly Hilton Hotel, one of the most common mistakes is for diners at a round table to assume control of the bread plate to their right instead of their rightful bread plate to the left. What happens next might best be termed a dining domino effect as everyone else at the table is forced to take the bread plate to their right. Unless, of course, a diner on the other side of the table has already staked out one to the left, which leaves someone without a bread plate altogether.

Another common dilemma: how to get butter from point A, the butter dish, to point B, your bread. Use the butter knife to retrieve a pat of butter as the dish is passed around the table. Place the butter on your bread plate, return the butter knife to the dish, then use your own knife to spread butter on your bread.

And if you do find yourself drawn into the who’s-got-my-bread-plate controversy, “adjust,” says Loeffel. “It’s not worth anyone getting embarrassed over it. Also, any server worth his weight will notice what’s happening and will adjust for you by bringing new silverware or another bread plate.” At their best, rules of table etiquette are designed for clarity, not one-upmanship. Consider, for example, the story credited to Queen Victoria, who, upon seeing an unsuspecting dinner guest pick up his finger bowl and drink from it, raised her own finger bowl to her lips and also drank. Taking her lead, the rest of the guests joined her.

And they all lived happily, perhaps not ever after, but at least through the dessert course. — By Debra Hotaling, Special to the Times, 1998

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Table Setting Etiquette in 1938

In setting the table, it is always the rule to place the silver to be used first farthest from the service plate, those to be used last, nearest to it. The forks are always placed on the left side of the plate; the knives (with the sharp edge toward the plate) and the spoons are on the right side of it. 

Household Hints:  The Smart Hostess on Setting the Table

There are certain rules for table settings and service that is well to review. These we have listed as briefly as possible. 

General Directions 

1 — Silver should always be placed in the order in which it is to be used, working from the outside in toward the plate. 

2 — Spoons and knives are placed at the right of the plate; forks at the left, with the possible exception of the oyster fork, which may be placed at the extreme right of the plate, so that it is the first piece of silver on the right. 

3 — If the meal begins with a fruit cocktail, the fruit spoon is placed at the extreme right; the bouillon or soup spoon next to it in toward the plate. Then come the fish or entree knife (used infrequently,) and next to this the meat knife. (If a salad or lettuce knife is used it may be placed next to the dinner knife, in toward the plate.) At luncheon or breakfast the first knife may be the butter spreader; butter spreader may also be placed on bread and butter plate for breakfast 
4 — At the extreme left of the plate is the fork first to be used; usually the fish fork or entree fork. Next to it, toward the plate, is the meat fork, and third, the salad fork. 

5 — All silver should be placed one half inch, or one inch, from the edge of the table, in an even and compact row. The sharp edge of each knife is always turned toward the plate. 

Setting for Breakfast, Luncheon, Dinner and Formal Dinner  

In setting the table, it is always the rule to place the silver to be used first farthest from the service plate, those to be used last, nearest to it. The forks are always placed on the left side of the plate; the knives (with the sharp edge toward the plate) and the spoons are on the right side of it. Water glasses stand at the tip end of the knife blade nearest the plate; the butter plate stands at the tip end of the fork. The napkin is placed either on the left side beside the fork farthest from the plate or, when there is no food on it, on the service plate. At formal dinners, butter is not served, so the butter plate is omitted. 


Breakfast

Suppose our menu consists of fruit, cereal, toast, bacon, eggs, coffee and jam. Each place should be equipped as follows: On the right of the plate and farthest from it, will lie the fruit spoon (although this may be on the fruit plate). Going towards the plate the cereal spoon lies next to the fruit spoon. Beside it is the knife of the main course and next to it, beside the service plate, is the coffee spoon, though it may lie in the saucer. On the left side and farthest from the plate, is the folded napkin. Next to it the fork for the main course. The butter spreader may be in front of the plate or lie on the butter plate. 


Dinner 

Flat silver for a menu consisting of fruit cocktail, main course, salad, dessert, and coffee would be placed as follows: The fruit cocktail spoon may lie on the table at the right farthest from the service plate or on the service plate. Next to it on the table, lies the soup spoon; the knife for the main course lies next to it, and the spoon for dessert lies between it snd the service plate, if it is not brought in when the course is served. On the left side, farthest from the plate, lies the folded napkin. Next to it lies the fork for the main course and between it and the plate, lies the salad fork. — Coronado Citizen, 1938

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Place Plate Etiquette

Service plates or place plates can easily elevate the look of one’s table. “The service plate remains upon the table until the dish is served and forms a foundation plate for both the cocktail and the soup.” – “Service plates,” “place plates” or “chargers” are now left by some hosts and hostesses, until the dessert course because it is used as a decorative part of the place setting.

A Table Nicety 

Strict regard for the niceties of table setting is an unfailing test of the clever hostess and requires continued observance of the correct laying of all the sterling appointments. An item of particular importance, is the place plate, used today in many smart homes. The etiquette of this piece of sterling need cause no worry in the heart of the inexperienced housewife. She must remember only this; at no time should the guest be left without a plate in front of him. The service plate remains upon the table until the dish is served and forms a foundation plate for both the cocktail and the soup. Like all pieces, it is removed from the left by the maid. In many homes, the place plate is returned and used for the dinner course, for which it is equally appropriate. – Calexico Chronicle, 1928

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Place Cover Etiquette, 1922—Now

1920's inspired, luncheon place setting or place "cover," using mixed period flatware and glassware.

Before Anything Edible Comes to the Table

We will not waste time on directions regarding the laying of the tablecloth. Only remember that it must form a true line through the center of the table (your "silence cloth" had best be of table padding, a doubled cotton flannel or asbestos) and not hang below the table less than nine inches. 

The usual arrangement of the centerpiece in the center of the table (the table itself being immediately under the light, unless the waitress is thereby prevented from moving between the table and sideboard) with its dish of fruit or ferns or flowers (never so high as to cut off view or conversation) can be varied to suit individual taste. But the covers (the plates, glasses, napkin and silver of each individual) must always be in line, opposite each other on the opposite sides of the table.

The plate doilies indicate the covers when a bare table is laid. The service plate which each person receives stays where put unless it is replaced by a hot plate.

Napkins, Silver, China and Glass

Napkins (fold flat and square) lie at the left of the forks. The hem of the napkin, turned up, should parallel the forks and the table edge.

When dinner is served without a maid, everything yields to avoiding leaving the table. In that case put on the dessert silver (which otherwise should not be done) with the other dinner silver. 

Place all silver in its order of use, and remember that three forks are enough. If more are needed let them appear with the courses which demand them. The quietest and therefore most desirable way of putting the dessert silver on the table, is to serve it from a napkin, from the right. 

Knives should have their cutting edge toward the plate, at its right, and lie half an inch from the table edge. Spoons, bowls facing upward, lie at the right of the knife; forks at the left of the plate.    

 A typical 1925 luncheon menu.

When shell food is served (clams, oysters or mussels) the fork is placed at the right of the plate. The upper right-hand side of the bread and butter plate is the place for the butter spreader. 

In general do not arrange your cover too loosely, and see to it that the glass, china and silver for each cover sets close without the pieces touching. Glasses are placed just above the knives, a little to the right. Neither cups nor glasses should ever be filled to the brim. 

The bread and butter plate (bread and butter are, as a rule, not served with formal dinners) somewhat to the left, beyond the service plate. Between each two covers, or just in front of each, place your pepper and salt sets. The salt spoon lies across the open saltcellar.

When the table is set for some impromptu meal at which a knife will not be used, the fork takes the place of the knife at the right-hand side, and the teaspoon is laid beside the fork.

Desirable Improvements

No one wants to see the inner economy of the butler's pantry, nor should the perhaps fragrant but cloying odors of the kitchen be wafted into the dining room whenever the swingdoor of the pantry opens or closes. The screen obviates both disadvantages. 

Another improvement has been the introduction of the serving table in place of the sideboard. It now conveniently holds all the extras needed for the meal. — Lillian B. Lansdown's 1922, “How to Prepare and Serve a Meal; and Interior Decoration.”

Etiquette Enthusiast Maura J Graber is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Table Settings

3 Ways to Set a Dinner Table 

from ProFlowers.com

Food? Check. Drinks? Check. Table setting? Almost. While a simple plate, fork, spoon and knife set-up may do the job, if you really want to impress your dinner guests, take the extra time to set a formal dining room table. Before you feel the need to start shopping around for an oyster fork, ProFlowers has outlined the three main table settings—basic, informal and formal—for you to choose from based on your style and dinner plan.

They’ve also included some fun table-setting trivia so you can spend your meal impressing guests after setting the perfect tablescape. Bon Appétit!

A basic setting need not have a spoon, unless it is for a particular food or course.

A cup and saucer are only proper at informal dinner settings, at lunch settings and breakfast settings. 

The fork is the only utensil allowed at all 3 sides of a setting. A maximum of 3 are allowed on the left, 1 is allowed on the right for the appetizer, and 1 is allowed above the plate for a dessert course.

Ultimately, good food and good company make for the best dinner parties. Bring together your table setting with a fabulous bouquet. From rustic to elegant, a floral centerpiece can set the tone for your meal.

ProFlowers sells a wide variety of fresh-cut flowers, mixed bouquets and potted plants, shipped fresh from the grower.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber is the Site Moderator for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia