Etiquette and Spoon Holders

Spoon Holders, also known as “Spooners” in some areas of the U.S., were a popular part of the late 19th century tea table équipage. The etiquette for the combination spoon holders/sugar bowls was to lift the spoon by the handle, not the bowl, to avoid potentially dirtying another’s spoon. 

A Combination Spoon Holder and Sugar Bowl, with a dozen spoons hanging around the bowl. Reproduction silver-plate, combination spoon holder/sugar bowls were being offered by International Silver in the early to mid-1990’s, featuring a similar design to the antique bowl and holder pictured above, but with a bird instead of the butterfly finial.

Like the old-fashioned butter dish, spoon holders were frequently part of a tea set in Victorian silverplate. As a matter of fact, in some sets the spoon holder was furnished in place of the waste bowl. (Then inelegantly called a slop bowl.) But, in its day, the spoon holder was considered a standard piece of equipment on the well set dining table and most silverware makers offered many additional designs from which to choose.

Most of these were about the size and shape of a goblet, but not quite as tall, and usually had two handles. There were also double spoon holders, and some in unusual shapes. There were some which included a bell to call the maid between courses. Almost all of them were made entirely of metal.

Around 1890 there were also three piece sets called Dessert Sets, made up of sugar bowl, cream pitcher and spoon holder. Some of these had glass linings in a silver plated frame. A particularly handsome one was made by Simpson, Hall, Miller and Comp any of Wallingford, Connecticut in 1891. The frame was ornamented with medallions of Greecian type heads and the linings were rich ruby glass in all three pieces.

A variation of the spoon holder is one called a “Combination Spoon Holder and Sugar Bowl.” This was a large sugar bowl with racks around the perimeter to hold a dozen spoons. Spoon holders in silverplate had a comparatively long life. They date back as early as 1861, and a few were still being sold as late as 1934. (Site editor’s note: Reproduction silver-plate, combination spoon holder/sugar bowls were being offered by International Silver in the early to mid-1990’s, featuring a similar design to the antique bowl and holder pictured above, but with a bird instead of the butterfly finial.)

Those found in antique shops now can sometimes be distinguished from similarly shaped articles because the bottom of the inside is scarred and indented from the many spoons placed in them over the years. They make nice little conversation pieces today, and can be used as small vases, or containers for cigarettes.

 —From “The Elegance of Old Silverplate and Some Personalities,” by Edmund P. Hogan

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Gilded Age Card Receivers

An 1882 Meriden Britannia catalog page with the different card receiver designs available in the Gilded Age –  “Quite apart from such details as the correct size and typography was the difficult symbolism involved in bending the edges. Turning down the upper right-hand corner signified a personal visit; the upper left corner, congratulations; the lower right hand corner, adieu; the lower left corner, condolence; the entire left end, a call on the whole family. This practice, introduced from abroad shortly after the Civil War, commended itself to city dwellers who had little time or inclination for individual visits and yet did not wish to feel negligent of their duties... Despite its conveniences, the custom was becoming passé by the 1890s. The sign language proved too great a tax on the human intelligence.” (Reprinted with permission of The MacMillan Company from “Learning How to Behave” 

One of the most intriguing pieces of Victorian silverplate is called a “Card Receiver." It was an extremely popular piece in its day, made by all the silverware makers. Perhaps no other single item was made in such great variety in size and form and elaborateness of decoration.

In the 1860's a generally practiced social custom was "visiting" or “paying calls” on friends and acquaintances. And whether or not the “visitee” was at home, the visitor left her card in a small receptacle on the hall table, provided for the purpose.

So widespread was the custom that even in far away and sparsely settled Alaska, and as late as 1911, women observed this example of correct etiquette.

Margaret A. Murie in her book “Two in the Far North,” published by Alfred A. Knopf, Inc., describes life in Fairbanks, Alaska in 1911. (She was nine years old.):

“The respectable society of Fairbanks was very proper. Every house, no matter how small, had a ‘card tray’ on a little stand by the door, and the ladies all left cards, another fascinating little facet of life for a small girl. After the callers had left, I would study the cards ‘Mrs. Louis Kossuth Pratt’, ‘Mrs. John Knox Brown.’ To me these were somewhat awesome symbols of a world I could not know for some years.

“On Wednesday there were the meetings of the Ladies Aid or The Guild. On Thursday many ladies went out calling on the ladies who had ‘Thursdays’ engraved on the lower corners of their cards.”

At one time there was even a “language” of cards whereby the bending of the corners had special significance.

“Quite apart from such details as the correct size and typography was the difficult symbolism involved in bending the edges. Turning down the upper right-hand corner signified a personal visit; the upper left corner, congratulations; the lower right hand corner, adieu; the lower left corner, condolence; the entire left end, a call on the whole family. This practice, introduced from abroad shortly after the Civil War, commended itself to city dwellers who had little time or inclination for individual visits and yet did not wish to feel negligent of their duties... Despite its conveniences, the custom was becoming passé by the 1890s. The sign language proved too great a tax on the human intelligence.” (Reprinted with permission of The MacMillan Company from “Learning How to Behave,” by Arthur M. Schlesinger. Copyright 1946 by Arthur M. Schlesinger.)

Early card receivers were quite simple, consisting of a small tray about six inches in diameter mounted on a pedestal. And only a few styles were offered.

It was not until the 1870’s and 1880’s, when homes and home furnishings and styles in clothing reflected the Victorian trend, that card receivers came into their own. The styles then followed and perhaps even exceeded the elaborate and flamboyant taste which was the order of the day.

The old catalogs of the Meriden Britannia Co. of Meriden, Connecticut clearly demonstrate the growing popularity of card receivers, and the increasing variety of sizes, shapes and ornamentation. In 1861, four designs were offered; in 1867-71 there were fourteen; in 1879 the number had increased to thirty-one. The catalog of 1882 offered fifty-three different designs, and that of 1886, fifty-eight. This seems to have been the peak of the elaborate and unusual forms.

And what decorations there were! Card receivers were ornamented with owls, butter flies, children, cherubs, birds, fruits, cats, dogs, flowers and foliage in fantastic arrange ments. Many of them included colorful flower vases in what is known today as “art glass.”

In the early 1900’s, few styles were offered, and by then, most of them were just the card “trays” mentioned by Mrs. Murie in her book. In addition to the Meriden Britannia Co., other silverware makers in the Meriden, Connecticut area made them too. Such firms as Meriden Silver Plate Co., Middletown Plate Co., Wilcox Silver Plate Co., Wm. Rogers Mfg. Co, Derby Silver Co., and Simpson, Hall, Miller & Co., to name just a few, offered equally attractive assortments.

Despite the widespread custom of leaving cards, and the great variety of card receivers offered by so many makers over a period of forty years, this piece of Victorian silverplate seems to be scarce in antique shops today. One sees them occasionally, but they are not nearly as common as cake baskets, dinner casters, pickle casters, and butter dishes, which flourished in the same period.

—From “The Elegance of Old Silverplate and Some Personalities,” by Edmund P. Hogan

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia