A Congressman’s Etiquette Lessons

Photo of a White House State Dinner place setting for President Lyndon Johnson. Cigarettes and matches were requirements for a properly set formal table of the era. Smoking was not banned in the White House until the Clinton Administration in the 1990’s

LIGHTER SIDE OF WASHINGTON 

Congressman Gets Seven Cards Telling Of Proper Dinner Behavior

WASHINGTON (UPI) By no standards that I know of could Rep. John F. Baldwin be described as a bumpkin. He is a graduate of the University of California; he was president of his law class for three years; he was a practicing attorney for five years, and he has served in Congress since 1954. You would think a person with this background would feel at home in almost any company. Yet there is something about a State Dinner at the White House that makes even a relatively sophisticated congressman uncertain about his manners. 

Baldwin was one of the guests at the dinner that President Kennedy gave for the Shah of Iran last week, and I suppose it was the invitation that put him on edge. As he related a report on the affair to his constituents, the envelope contained no less than five cards, which seemed to take nothing for granted. The first card told what the occasion was. The second one gave the time and place of the dinner. The third one told him what to wear. The fourth one told him where to respond. And the fifth one told him what gate to enter. When he and his wife arrived at the White House, they were handed still another card which told them where to sit. At the table, they found a seventh card which made it clear they had found the right place. It was at this point, apparently, that Baldwin’s confidence in his table etiquette was shattered. 

“I must confess that my main concern during the dinner, was whether I was using the proper knife or the proper fork at the right time,” he said. “There were three different knives on the right, and three different forks on the left.” Expressing hope that he “represented you properly at this state dinner,” he said, "I think I only used the wrong fork once." Well, gee, I don’t want to embarrass the congressman or anything, but I must point out that when you have three forks, it is impossible to use the wrong fork only once. Silverware errors are cumulative and cannot be rectified as the meal progresses. In other words, if Baldwin used his dinner fork on the salad, then he must have used his salad fork during the main course or desert. But Baldwin needn’t feel chagrined about it, for it was the fault of the White House staff. They should have provided yet another card showing which fork to use.– Madera Tribune, 1962

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette for 19th C. State Dinners

The long White House tables, all dressed up, for a State Dinner being held in honor of Admiral Dewey

State Dinner Etiquette

Just What the Host and Guests are Expected to Do 

The usual hour for a state dinner is 8 p.m. As the guests arrive, which should be fifteen minutes before the hour set, they are shown to the rooms for the removal of wrappings, and descend by the private stairway to the grand corridor and proceed direct to the East Room, where the President and lady await them. 
                                     

Benjamin Harrison was the President of the United States in 1890. This is a photo of the "Harrison Presidential china." For more on Presidential china, read our post on The Etiquette of White House Table Service and State Dinners or Etiquette and Dishing on White House China for State Dinners

Each gentleman, upon entering the room, is handed by an usher, a small envelope containing a card inscribed with the plan of the table and bearing the name of the lady he will escort. On the diagram, the number of the seats he and the lady will occupy are marked. After being received by the President, he examines the card and immediately joins the lady he will accompany to the State Dining Hall. The lady whom he has brought remains with him until her escort appears. 
                                            

"The President with the first lady guest, leads the way to the State Dining Room, followed by the remaining guests. The residing lady, escorted by the principal man, close the line." The first lady guest was the female guest of greatest importance. The residing lady was who is now known as the "First Lady" or "FLOTUS." For more who the original "First Ladies"of Washington D.C. society were, read our post on 19th C. Washington Societal Etiquette Above~ A stereoscopic view of the unset White House tables.

All the guests having arrived at the appointed hour, the steward announces the dinner is in readiness. The President with the first lady guest, leads the way to the State Dining Room, followed by the remaining guests. The residing lady, escorted by the principal man, close the line. The Marine band meanwhile performs a suitable march. In the dining room, the guests find their places and take the seats assigned them by the plate cards, which correspond in location with the diagram handed them upon entering the East Room.

A corner of the East Room, modern day.

There are four services at all State dinners. The dishes in their order are served on silver salvers by waiters, the guests helping themselves. The chief waiter serves the President first, and then proceeds toward the the right, and the second waiter toward the left. The same course is observed on the opposite side of the table, beginning with the presiding lady. No one is ever served twice. The plates of one course are removed as soon as each guest is finished, and the plate for the next is put in its place.

"There are four services at all State Dinners. The dishes in their order are served on silver salvers by waiters, the guests helping themselves."~ The first White House Cookbook was published in 1887. Not only did it have Presidential favorite foods, recipes and the menus from important meals and events held in the Executive Mansion, but it also had "recipes" for cosmetics and cleaners, basic etiquette of the day and tips on child rearing. It really had everything a lady of the Victorian Era ought to know. Its menus, recipes and helpful tips, made this a favorite cookbook of wives across the U.S. 

At the close of dinner, which lasts about three hours, it has been the custom of late years for the gentleman to leave the table with the ladies and not return. The custom during the earlier administrations was for the ladies to have their coffee served in the drawing-room, and for the gentleman to return to drink a single glass of wine to the health of the President. Gentlemen wishing to enjoy a cigar retire during the coffee to the corridor of the foot of the private stairway, but join the ladies when the presiding lady makes the motion to retire. After the promenade through the suite of parlors, the gentlemen surrender the ladies to the gentleman with whom they came, and with their own ladies take leave of the President and his lady. They should receive their wrappings and leave the building quietly and promptly. The last of the guests should have retired within thirty minutes after leaving the table. –From the Washington Star, March 15, 1890 

 🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor of the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Etiquette of White House Table Service and State Dinners

State dinners had become so large by Ronald Reagan's presidency that none of the china could accommodate the number of guests. First Lady Nancy Reagan ordered 4,370 pieces of Lenox china, enough place settings of 19 pieces for 220 people. This was nearly twice as many placesettings as other recent services. The Reagans wanted a design that would display a strong presence for the subtly colored State Dining Room, now painted white. Nancy Reagan worked closely with Lenox designers to create a pattern with bands in a striking scarlet red, which was her favorite color. The pattern was bordered on each side with etched gold, which created a sparkling contrast with the soft ivory china. The presidential seal was in raised gold in the center, partially overlaying the red border. On pieces such as the service and dessert plates, fine gold crosshatching overlays the red.  The Reagans were often criticized for the $209,508 cost, but the china was not funded by taxpayers. It was paid for by the J.P. Knapp Foundation.

All through the Cold War, the White House maintained the tradition of Russian table service at its official luncheons and dinners. And now that the Russians have switched from threatening to bewildering, there is talk of abolishing Russian service.

Trust Miss Manners to discover the one political issue that excites no one except herself. But perhaps she can stir something up.The question is only whether food at formal meals should be offered around on platters, with guests taking what they want, or whether each guest should be handed a pre-filled plate, with some of everything on it. Who cares?

But we're talking about a republic. Surely we can turn this into an emotional debate with charges of elitism and the stifling of creativity on one side, and of throwing people out of work and wasting the earth's resources on the other.

Stereoscopic view of the White House State Dining Room tables set in the latter half of the 19th century.  The tables were long at the time.  Jacqueline Kennedy changed White House dining when she opted to make a switch to smaller, and more intimate, round tables during the Kennedy Administration.   They remain round to this day.

The teams are: Russian, French, American (known to the English as English) and Restaurant, listed in reverse order of probable popularity. But since people seem to feel so passionately about their food nowadays (which is why Miss Manners figured that restaurants would claim loyalty before any country), their respective positions - long since removed from any real national claims - should be examined.

All of these are types of formal service, in the modern sense of meaning that guests do not actually have to bus their own dishes. (The equivalent understanding of informal service probably involves keeping the refrigerator door open, and Miss Manners doesn't want to know the details.)

In French service, huge numbers of dishes are set out in symmetrical patterns on the dining table, guests being expected to help themselves and one another from what they find within reach. Standard until the late 19th century, this may be said to survive in today's buffet table. But how we evolved to being dumber than the Victorians, who realized how foolish it was to ask human beings to eat standing up, Miss Manners cannot say.

In Russian service, which replaced the French, food is arranged on platters that are taken around to the seated guests, who serve themselves. Leaving enough to go around depends on the honor system.

The success of a state dinner tends to hinge on a well-choreographed series of social gestures. Other than not fighting, the rules are common-sensical: For example, don't wear a pink pantsuit like the one Martha Stewart did during the official visit of the president of Hungary- to much derision at a state dinner in June 1999 - and never sit down until the president does.
"You stand in deference, you don't begin eating until everyone at the table is served, you talk to everybody," according to Letitia Baldrige,  the late etiquette expert who was social secretary to Jacqueline Kennedy. "And you never complain about the food."

In formal American service, the only formal service that still honors the noble and ancient ritual of personally carving for one's guests, the host or hostess carves the meat at the table after inquiring about the preferences of each guest. If the veggies are put on, too, and if everyone passes the plates down the table (and, if they are overly polite, all the way around and back again), it is "family style," but if servers do all that, it is formal.

In Restaurant service, which is to say at all except the truly best restaurants, food is "plated" in the kitchen, and each person is given some of everything. The commercial attraction is that this is the speediest service, which employs the fewest people.

Notice that this is the only formal service in which guests are not allowed to choose what they take (although in restaurants, they have already stated their preferences when they ordered).

You see where Miss Manners is leading. She is about to suggest that if the White House changes from Russian service to Restaurant (the French system being defunct and the American being impractical for big dinners, however comfy it would be to see the president carving), good food will be wasted.

And that guests may find things on their plates to which they have philosophical, medical or religious objections. And that worthy people with families to support may find themselves out of jobs.

Miss Manners really doesn't want to use those tedious arguments, any more than she wants to fight the even worse arguments that Russian service inhibits the creativity of chefs who would prefer to dribble sauces artistically on plates rather than on platters, or that it is elitist because the citizenry doesn't eat that way every day.

She prefers to argue that the mere continuing of a graceful tradition to distinguish special-occasion dining from more practical methods for everyday use is what is important. There is a vast difference between dignity and pretentiousness.

For Dining and Diplomacy; The Clinton White House's Tables for Queen Elizabeth II's visit. Gaffes in this setting are long remembered. For example, Jimmy Carter's 1979 state dinner for Mexican president, Jose Lopez Portillo. Carter shocked his guests with an indiscreet joke about getting "Montezuma's revenge" (a severe diarrhea) while visiting Mexico. And protocol can only go so far when so many ambitious people are going to be crammed into one room. Social secretaries of past administrations can recall movie stars refusing to give the Secret Service their actual birth dates for security clearances and guests who ran into the State Dining Room, attempting to change name cards for better schmoozing potential.

Dining at the White House has been steadily de-formalized over the past few administrations, until it is nearly comparable to eating in a fancy restaurant. Guests regularly bring dates, reply by telephone (or forget to reply and have to be called), dress for shock rather than decorum, or refuse the invitation altogether, if they have something better to do.

First-timers who consider it a command performance and strain to live up to it by polishing their conversation, their shoes and their manners soon find that the custom is to treat it casually.

And that the unflattering rationale is that anything nicer and more special would be wasted on ordinary citizens, who wouldn't know how to handle it.

The main article was originally published on June 14 1994, and was written by Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia