Poor Table Manners are Unacceptable

“A man is embarrassed to be seen in smart places with a girl who holds a loaded fork in mid-air as she talks, keeps her arms crudely propped on the table.” — Above… One arm and both elbows on the table? Fork up in the air with food on it? Slouchy posture? She seems so blithely unaware that from his posture and his facial expression, he lost interest a while ago!

Poor Manners at Table to Be Deplored

You may not think your escort would notice a “little thing” like your table manners. But make a slip or two and watch his opinion of you go down! A man is embarrassed to be seen in smart places with a girl who holds a loaded fork in mid-air as she talks, keeps her arms crudely propped on the table.

But unless you're familiar with the rules, it’s hard to know what to do. Perhaps you wonder whether you should drink from your bouillon cup. Yes, you may. Use a spoon until the broth is cool enough. But never break crackers into your soup. Croutons or tiny bits of toast may be dropped in whole.

What to do when a hostess offers you a dish you don't care for? Don't speak of your dislike. Take a small quantity and, if necessary, leave it on your plate. With etiquette to guide you, even minor mishaps won’t upset your poise. Should you get a bone or fruit seed in your mouth, you inconspicuously drop it into your cupped hand. And, of course, you’ll never use your napkin as a screen.

Be perfectly sure of yourself when dining out. — From "Good Table Manners" in the Press-Telegram Home Service, 1940

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Table Manners Must Be Practiced

Good table manners are important, not only that we may have the satisfaction of feeling certain that what we do is right, but that we may give no offense to others.

TABLE MANNERS

“For as laws are necessary that good manners be preserved, so there is need of good manners that laws may be maintained.” - Machiavelli

THE gracious hostess will have the most perfect of table manners. It is not enough to know proper customs of table usage, but one must practice them consistently. It is always easy to distinguish the truly cultured person from the one whose manners are white-washed on, so to speak, in the way he behaves at all times. If his politenesses are brought out to be used only before company, they are sure to have an ill-fitting appearance, to creak in the hinges as it were. He is self- conscious, ill at ease, and not sufficiently sure of himself to forget himself. 

He has to keep looking on at his own actions to see if they are coming out all right. The person who knows correct behavior and practices it continually never has to think whether what he is doing is correct or not. He can go ahead and talk or laugh or listen, and all the time his fingers and hands and mouth will be behaving quite nicely, not giving offense to himself or any one else.

The best way to be sure of good manners is to learn them when you are quite young and then persist until they become a habit. Good table manners are important, not only that we may have the satisfaction of feeling certain that what we do is right, but that we may give no offense to others.

Eating may become an unpleasant affair, if one is careless about the way in which it is done. Sit beside a person for an hour who gobbles his soup, smacks his lips, chews noisily, sucks his teeth, wiggles in his chair, shoves the silver about, and see whether you feel that you have had a pleasant and enjoyable meal. The obvious answer is, don't do any of these things, but there are a good many other and lesser “don't's” with which it is well to be acquainted. — From “The Gracious Hostess” by Della Thompson Lutes, 1923

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia