Simplicity in Table Setting is Key

Elaborate and ornate settings go with ceremonious living; if you do not live ceremoniously, do not adopt them. Simple living calls for the beauty of simplicity. If you live one way, you can not imitate the other smartly.

The Keynote Is Simplicity

Two or three implements on each side of a plate take up considerable space, so for reasons of neatness and order the table is not loaded with more silver than is needed for the main courses. The dessert spoon and fork are therefore placed on the dessert plate, which stands on the sideboard ready – set for convenience. They are brought to the table on that plate after the more substantial part of the meal is over and placed in front of the diner, who himself not the maid-lifts them off at once and places them on the table.

As we noted in a previous post, service is always from the left because it is easier for the person served to help himself from that side. Used plates are always removed from the left lest the person removing them precipitate a great crash of china and glass by knocking against a diner's hand, which might be stretched out suddenly to take a glass of water. Therefore, we repeat: serve from the left; take all dishes away from the left, but remove glasses and unused right-hand implements from the right.

The sort of china, glass, and silver used, the way a table may be decorated and lighted, the kind of covering most appropriate -all these depend on the taste of the hostess and her understanding of what fits her surroundings. There is no rigid rule of etiquette about them. Elaborate and ornate settings go with ceremonious living; if you do not live ceremoniously, do not adopt them. Simple living calls for the beauty of simplicity. If you live one way, you can not imitate the other smartly.

Good taste is not a matter of the pocketbook; it is shown in the table arrangements of cottage and mansion alike. For instance, costly lace cloths, silver candelabra, priceless porcelain compote dishes, and great silver tankards filled with hothouse blossoms are suitable for fine houses, while a table made of polished silvery driftwood, set with gay pottery and colored glasses and decorated by large shells filled with wild flowers, is charming in a beach cottage.– From “Table Setting and Service” by Elizabeth Barnard, 1935

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette… the Hostess’s Bugbear

The idea that failure to do either one thing or the other marks one as unversed in the ways of society, is ridiculous. Ease of manner is the real mark of good breeding. If one is afraid to do the natural thing, ease of manner is impossible.

ETIQUETTE has become the bugbear of the hostess. It has been written about and talked about so much that it overshadows the delight of ordinary social intercourse. “Shall I do this?” “Shall I do that?” are the constant queries of people who have hitherto been entirely happy and correct in doing the natural thing. Of course, there are certain customs of good society that we all want to be conversant with; but etiquette is another word for usage, and usage is built up on good sense and good manners.

“Should I pick up a spoon that falls from the dinner table?” asks one harassed inquirer. “Why not?” is the answer. If there are servants at hand who can do it for you, or the spoon is not perfectly clean, or it has rolled to such a position that it would cause a diversion to grope for it, one's good sense bids it lie. But if it is within easy reach and the impulse is to pick it up, then do it. The idea that failure to do either one thing or the other marks one as unversed in the ways of society, is ridiculous. Ease of manner is the real mark of good breeding. If one is afraid to do the natural thing, ease of manner is impossible.

Entertaining, of course, offers its own special problems, but the hostess' greatest asset is a sense of hospitality and enjoyment of her guests. To be surrounded with things that are beautiful and charming is the desire of most people. If our surroundings are right and we endeavor to be as natural as possible, entertaining becomes a comparatively simple matter. It is essential, however, that the surroundings be right, and a hostess’ real necessity for perfect entertaining is correct service that is, charming linen, good china, and the best and most complete silverware equipment she can afford.

It is not always possible for the girl starting housekeeping to have all the silverware she would like, neither is it always wise for her to try. There is a danger that she will be tempted to buy inferior ware and make up in quantity what she lacks in quality. Each year, however, the service should be added to; for while the world may look leniently on the shortcomings in the service of the bride, it expects the hostess of standing to entertain with dignity and distinction.— From “ Etiquette, Entertaining and Good Sense,” 1923

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Trendy Tables Trashed in ‘29

Stick with what is “tried and true” instead of trying something new. The old rules are old, because the my have worked well for so long! … Above, suggested service plates, along with plates for fish, salad and dessert.— From the book, “Table Etiquette, Menus and Much Besides” by The Boston Cooking School

Table Etiquette— Within the last decade there has been a revolution in table (and other) etiquette. So many have been the changes and new departures, and often so unwarranted by good taste, that it became increasingly difficult to distinguish between the wheat of right usage and the tares of bad manners. In this book the changes are dealt with as follows:

1. The large number of new rules, which because of their reasonableness and good sense are here to stay, are set forth in contrast with those that are older and less excellent.

2. The old rules that have not been modified are presented as still obligatory, and likely, because of their propriety, to remain so.

3. New freedoms that are excessive and in bad taste, are named with the counsel to “play safe” by avoiding them.

4. Where a new custom is in flat contradiction to an old, good one, the new is often shown to be permissive, rather than prescribed. — By Mary D. Chambers, The Boston Cooking School, 1929

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia