Brazilian Body Language Etiquette

  Body Language in Brazil

• When conversing, good eye contact is important. To not do so is considered impolite.

 

• In a marketplace or store, if a vendor puts his thumb down it means, “There isn’t any left; I don’t have any more.” It can also be used to say that you are not feeling well, didn’t like something or to say that something went wrong.

 

• A good, warm handshake is traditional and totally acceptable in Brazil, but it’s  considered a more formal greeting. Handshakes are used mostly on business settings or when people are meeting for the first time in social settings. 

• The Brazilians show affection easily. In social occasions the greetings that are used the most are a kiss on the cheek or a hug. The most common is to greet friends and family with a kiss on the cheek. But frequently brazilians kiss on the cheek even people that they are meeting for the first time, like a friend of a friend. Hugs are mostly used with close people in these situations:

•  when we don’t see someone for a while, as if we were saying “I missed you”, 

• with someone you have seen lately but that you really like, as if we were saying “You’re special to me”.

• to congratulate someone for his birthday or for an achievement. 

If you choose to greet someone with a kiss on the cheek, you don’t need to do like this:

There’s no need to touch the other person's cheek with your lips. The picture above shows more intimacy and it’s mostly used between boyfriends and close family (mother and daughter, for example).

This is enough, just touching cheeks:

 

• People in Brazil will also shake hands when arriving and departing. There may also be a touching of the forearm or elbow, and often a pat on the back. The intention is to show affection. But it’s always a risk because even if brazilians are warm in general, there are people who don’t like to be touched and may feel it’s invasive. So it should be done only with close people. 

• If you are conducting business, be certain to bring some business cards because these are always exchanged. Digital business cards are also well accepted and used.

Also, during business meetings expect to be served (often) small cups of very strong coffee.

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• Since this is more of a touching society, people stand close together when conversing or when standing in lines.

 

• You may think they are blowing you a kiss, but when Brazilians bring their hand towards their mouths and kiss the tips of their fingers, then expand the fingers in an outward motion, it merely means that – probably the meal – was delicious.

 

• In Brazil, just like in America, people use the time out sign. It’s used specially in sports but it can be used in other places as well in order to ask for some time. 

• Brazilians also use the stop sign, to ask someone to stop doing something or to say “wait a minute”.

 

• There are many common friendly gestures in Brazil. One is the thumbs up gesture, which is also popular in America. In Brazil it is meant to mean “good” or “positive.”

Thumbs up is also used to ask for a ride.

 

• Making a hand movement that traces an imaginary horizontal line right above the line of their eyes means that person  does not have any more patience, like saying “I can’t take it anymore, I have it up to here”.

• Sometimes nonverbal communication can be very different than what is expected in other countries. One example is the “O.K.” symbol one can make with their hands. It is regarded as just meaning “O.K.” in the American culture. In Brazil it depends on the situation. Sometimes this may be seen as a very obscene gesture, equivalent to giving the middle finger in America.

• Showing the middle finger is seen as a very rude gesture, equivalent to saying “fuck you”.

• Another obscene hand gesture is called the “corno” which simulates a horn and historically means “your wife is cheating on you.” It is popular in Brazil and is often used when disagreeing with a football referee and it looks just like the “rock on” american gesture.

• One gesture that is also used is one to say “screw you.” It consists of making a fist with one hand and slapping it on top of the other hand once or twice. It is used commonly around Brazilian friends but can be rude if used any other time.

• Same as in Argentina, a close friendship or an incipient relationship is indicated by rubbing the two index fingers together.

• Just like in America, the brazilians make the letter L with the thumb and the index finger in the forehead to say someone is a loser. But it is considered a rude gesture and should be used only with very close people, like a teen with friends or brothers and sisters (not with your parents).

• A very unique body language in Brazil is the “figa”, represented by inserting the thumb between the middle and index finger. This gesture is supposed to keep away pain, suffering and envy and it is an amulet that protects against the “evil-eye” and it’s also used to express hope, when you have a strong wish.

• The “dar uma banana” or “give a banana” gesture in Brazil is an extremely offensive and rude gesture and it consists of bending the right arm at the elbow with the hand as a fist while making a chopping movement with the left arm towards the right elbow as in a forearm jerk. This gesture is also used on other countries of Latin America, in France and Italy with different names, of course. It is the equivalent of giving someone the finger.

 

• When you are far from someone and want to ask her to "come here." Extend your arm with the hand turned up and flex your index finger a few times. 

You can also flex all of your fingers at the same time

• In Brazil, to indicate that something is expensive or that you need money, hold your hand up towards your chest or a little higher and rub your thumb against your index finger.

Contributor, Gabriela Vassimon has been working as an etiquette consultant for over a decade. As Civility Expert’s Brazilian exclusive affiliate, Gabriela majored in Psychology, and has over 10 years of experience working with children, teenagers and adults in different sectors (clinic, school, orphanage, companies). Gabriela wears several hats as a psychologist, etiquette consultant and entrepreneur. She is a certified Children’s Character, Confidence and Courtesy Coach as well as Master Civility Trainer, member of ICTC (International Civility Trainer’s Consortium) and World Citizen Alliance, holds an MBA in people management, Gabriela is a continuous learner and eternal observer of human behavior. Recognizing that her passion is helping others to find the best versions of themselves, and aiming to build a kinder and more considerate world, Gabriela has launched Escola de Gentileza – civilidade e etiqueta (School of Kindness – civility and etiquette). The school offers training and classes in grooming, decorum, social graces, etiquette, and civility for all ages.

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

An Etiquette “Social Security Checklist”

For building social self-confidence and winning over others, always put a natural smile on your face and check yourself in the mirror before you put yourself in unfamiliar social or business situations. Look with a critical eye. Is there anything that stands out to you as possibly questionable?

Non-Verbal Skills and Body Language: 

• Is your posture non-threatening and open? Or are your arms crossed over your chest in a manner that may suggest you are bored? Or aloof? Disinterested? Angry? Or are your arms relaxed and casually at your sides?
• Is your smile natural? Does your smile look genuine? Or does your smile look forced? Does your smile look fake?

Verbal Skills: 

• Is your conversation light and friendly? Is it assured? Is it professional and business-like?
• Do you avoid confrontational statements or judgmental conversation? Do you avoid statements that begin with, “You should...”,  “You shouldn't...”, or “If I were you I would...” when your opinion hasn't been solicited or requested? These sentence openers can be misconstrued and give the impression that you know what is best for the other person/s involved. 
• Do you avoid racial slurs? Stereotypical statements about cultural or religious groups? Conversations including such content are off-limits in social and professional settings. 
• Also off-limits are foul language, off-color jokes, jokes of a sexual nature, personal finances, political opinions and any other matters of a “personal” nature.

Appropriate Attire: 

• Will you blend in with everyone else? Or do your clothes scream out, “Look at me!” Professional attire works the best when it invites compliments on your good taste, not gossip or questions about your common sense or mental state. 
• Do you ask for scrutiny or questions by wearing fraternal pins, insignias, religious medals, political buttons, tattoos, body-piercings in non-cultural or socially accepted bodily areas that are displayed for others? These things are best left at home or concealed under your garments when dealing in a professional (and many social) situations unless you are in a profession relating to such matters and no one would question, or find surprising, your choice in wearing or displaying them. — By Maura J. Graber, 1994

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Thumbs Up to Learning Etiquette

    We at Etiquipedia have mixed feelings about using the “thumbs up” gesture. Instagram is positively littered with “etiquette enthusiasts”and “étiqueteurs,” making like modern-day Goofuses and Gallants on video, with a “thumbs up” and “thumbs down” or shaming “finger wag” system, of demonstrating the proper and improper ways of doing something. The “thumbs up” signal has, overall, a positive connotation in most English-speaking countries. Popularization in the U.S. is generally attributed to the practices of American World War II pilots, using the “thumbs up” to communicate with ground crews prior to take-off. However, its meaning varies significantly from country to country and culture to culture. This hand gesture is considered very rude in several countries, including Iraq and Iran. In other countries, like Germany, France, and Hungary, the gesture can simply indicate the number one (the “Ok” gesture means the number zero, or “0.”) 

Starting in 2007, the “thumbs-up” appeared on India’s one-rupee coin. And it’s in India where you’ll find a “thumbs up” gesture used as part of the logo of “Thums Up,” a popular brand of Indian cola. American Sign Language users in the United States use a single thumb up, tilted slightly and moved, or shaken rapidly, from left to right to indicate the number ten, or 10. When held stationary and thrust toward another person the meaning is “yourself.” When lifted up by the other palm, it is read as, “help.” Nowadays, due to social media’s global reach, the “thumbs-up” sign on Facebook and other sites– as a clear statement of approval or agreement– is becoming much more acceptable than it once was.

Warning from Agriculture Dept... 

“Etiquette can be tricky when traveling overseas”

WASHINGTON (AP) - When an American travels abroad with an eye on new markets for farm products, it’s best to be on good behavior and to observe proper etiquette, the Agriculture Department says.

For example, you are in an Arabian Gulf country and have consumed several small cups of bitter cardamom coffee. You would rather not drink more. Should you; 

• (a) place your palm over the cup when the coffee pot is passed? 
• (b) turn your empty cup upside down on the table? or 
• (c) hold the cup and twist your wrist from side to side? 

The answer, according to USDA’s Foreign Agricultural Service, is (c). But the quiz may be a trifle suspect, since the final of 10 questions offered to test a reader’s business etiquette says: 

“Body language is just as important as the spoken word in many countries. For example, in most countries, the ‘thumbs-up’ sign means ‘OK.’ But in which of the following countries is the sign considered a rude gesture?”

•  (a) Germany, 
• (b) Italy, 
• (c) Australia.

The answer, the agency says, is (c). But a spokesman at the Australian Embassy denied that his countrymen consider a ‘thumbs-up’ gesture offensive.

The spokesman, not identified, told a reporter “We have other fingers that might be rude, but not the thumb.” Lynn K. Goldsbrough, editor of Foreign Agriculture magazine in which the article appeared, said the information was taken from a book on taboos around the world and used in the quiz. When told about the reaction from the Australian Embassy, Ms. Goldsbrough laughed and said, “Maybe he’s from a different part of Australia. I guess you can’t believe everything you read in books, huh?” 

Another answer to a question advised prospective exporters to refrain from tipping in Iceland, although it’s permissible in Britain and Canada. And the normal work week in Saudi Arabia is Saturday through Wednesday. 

In Japan, where giving gifts is common among business acquaintances, one should “thank the giver and open the present later.” It would be bad form to open the present immediately and thank the giver, or suggest the giver open the present for you.

 Good topics of conversation in Latin America might include sports, the weather or travel, the report said, but religion and local politics should be avoided. If flowers are in order as a gift to a hostess, some ground rules are in order, since “both the type of flower and color can have amorous, negative or even ominous implications,” the report said.

 “Purple flowers are a sign of death in Brazil, as are chrysanthemums in France in Switzerland, as well as in many other northern European countries, red roses suggest romantic intention.” – By Don Kendall, AP Farm Writer, 1987

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Travel

Learn the culture, what's acceptable and unacceptable. For example, "almost half of all Japanese hotels ban tourists with tattoos from public bathing areas due to tattoos being common among yakuza crime organizations, although these bans are being reconsidered by Japan’s tourism agencies in an effort to boost tourism. However, they’re not the only country with tattoo bans. Thailand and Sri Lanka are cracking down on tourists getting Buddha tattoos while visiting due to cultural insensitivity." — From TravelAgeWest.com 

Choose the Right Destination 

Make informed choices when picking destinations. Learning about a country or area before you go, will help you decide whether it's the right destination for you. It will hopefully prevent unpleasant surprises, too. What will the weather be like? What foods are commonly available? Unexpected extreme poverty, political policies, and even hygiene practices of the locals, can leave some travelers shocked, baffled or stunned. 

Do Some Homework

Travel isn't just about the sites, but the people, too. Aside from the usual guidebooks, government websites are good places to start researching a country's people or destination, and hundreds of foreign news sites can be found at online. Not surprisingly, personal blogs and vlogs from expats, can give you a really unique window into your chosen destination.

Respect Local Customs 

Study up on what's appropriate in terms of behavior and clothing. Visiting holy sites without wearing the proper attire and exhibiting appropriate behavior, can be extremely difficult. Knowledge of local customs will make you more at ease. It's also much less disruptive to the locals. 

Queue jumping is acceptable in some countries and unacceptable in others. A little research on your part, can go a long way in easing the frustrations of waiting in line.

Respect the environment around you, as more often than not, resources are scarce in developing countries, and may not be what you are expecting. Don't exhaust local supplies by overusing water or leaving excessive amounts of garbage in your wake. Locals will only be annoyed by what will be perceived as selfish behavior on your part.

Always bargain politely. Haggling over prices is seen as a fun type of "sport" in many foreign marketplaces and shops. It is even expected in others. Don't take your dickering too far though. In developing nations, a dollar or two will usually mean far more to the seller, than it ever will to you. 

Tipping can be expected in some places, while seen as an insult in other locales. Check beforehand to find out whether tipping is desired or expected. If tipping is required or encouraged, ask a guide for the typical amounts to give.

Watch Your Hand Gestures 

As insignificant as they may seem, one needs to use caution when gesturing with hands. When it comes to body language, err on the side of caution. Avoid gesturing with your hands and even pointing, if you're not sure what you are silently conveying. 

Represent 

Remember, you are representing the country that you are from. Don't spoil a place for other visitors and tourists from your home country, by exhibiting any ignorance of acceptable behavior when abroad.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Vietnamese Customs and Etiquette for Visiting Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam

Women in traditional Vietnamese outfits ~ It is rare for older Vietnamese women to shake hands with each other, or with men. Most physical contact between grown-up relatives or friends (both males and females), or between the same or opposite sexes, is not a commonly seen.  Many greet one another by bowing slightly to each other.  They may join hands.  In fact, members of the same sex often hold hands while walking together. Men and women do not show affection in public. Usually, higher ranking people are greeted first, for example, the head of the family. Touching children on the head is only done by parents, grandparents, etc... There are several titles of respect in the Vietnamese language, but these are not used in English. "Thua" (which means "please") is added in front of the first name as a show of respect. Visitors should use Mr., Ms., or a title, plus someone's first name.

With its curious blend of communist ideology and Confucianism, Vietnam can be a confusing place for first-time visitors. However, an important element of the society is its tolerance, which means you are likely to be forgiven if you show ignorance of Vietnamese ways. Nevertheless, most visitors like to avoid upsetting locals, so it pays to keep a few points of Vietnamese culture in mind while in Saigon in order to make your stay a smooth one.

Few visitors from Western countries, where communism is demonised, will need to be warned to avoid conflicts with the police or soldiers. In fact, such conflicts are unlikely as the presence of such state representatives on the streets of Saigon is minimal.

A view of Ho Chi Minh City (formerly Saigon) at night ~ Watch your body language in Vietnam: To beckon someone, extend your arm with your palm facing downward, and move your fingers in a scratching motion. Only beckon someone who has a "lower" status than you. Summoning someone with a curled index finger, is only done by a person's superior. 

Still, you need to remember that places like military installations are sensitive subjects and if you start taking pictures of such things, you could get yourself in trouble. This does not include places like the Cu Chi Tunnels and the War Remnants Museum, where you are free to photograph war relics that relate to the Vietnamese victory over its oppressors.

One aspect of Confucianism is that it is very conservative, and while the local people may appear to be casually dressed, there are certain places such as temples where visitors are expected to be respectfully attired. This means covering your shoulders and legs (no sleeveless shirts or shorts) and removing your shoes before entering the main building. As with every country, when you find yourself in an unfamiliar situation, it pays to watch carefully how the locals behave and imitate their behaviour to avoid causing offence.

“Women leaders in Vietnam are good at getting a family environment where people feel like they are part of a family or part of a team.  They have high loyalty.” –Bloomberg News

The conservative element in Vietnamese culture also means that it is very uncomfortable with open gay behaviour by men and women. The tolerant element of the culture means that gays are not persecuted, but there are few gay-friendly bars in Saigon and the majority of the city’s inhabitants still consider homosexuals to be as undesirable as prostitutes or drug dealers.

While you may occasionally witness Vietnamese arguing with each other, as with many Southeast Asian countries Vietnam puts a premium on controlling your temper. So if you find yourself getting angry, say with a tour agent for not providing services as advertised, take a deep breath and state your case in a calm, reasonable manner. This is much more likely to bring a satisfactory response than raising your voice and threatening the person concerned.

Vietnamese summer rolls ~ On dining in Vietnam:  Always use both hands when passing something to another person. Don’t be shy about lifting your bowl of rice or noodles to your mouth and shovelling it in with your chopsticks or slurping loudly. Such behaviour is a sign of someone enjoying their food and will probably please the cook.

Though most visitors have no difficulty adapting to Vietnamese culture, one area where many feel uneasy is eating in local restaurants. Don’t be surprised if you see customers discarding bones and tissues on the floor, as this is accepted practice and you’ll probably get a smile if they see you doing the same.

In the same way, don’t be shy about lifting your bowl of rice or noodles to your mouth and shovelling it in with your chopsticks or slurping loudly. Such behaviour is a sign of someone enjoying their food and will probably please the cook.

As for tipping, it’s unheard of in basic hole-in-the-wall places, though staff in restaurants that cater to tourists will appreciate it if you leave a few thousand dong. Likewise, if you are happy with the service given you by a tour guide or driver, any tip you offer will supplement their meagre salary. –Main article source One Stop Saigon

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

The Etiquette Minefield of Bowing, Hand Gestures and Handshakes

Bill Clinton... A master communicator with his hands.  But what exactly is he communicating?

Are you well-mannered?  Seemingly harmless hand gestures, handshaking and customs like the "okay" sign, the thumbs-up sign, certain colors or types of gifts and even casual greetings, can be entirely misconstrued on soil foreign to your own.  The consequences can range from humiliating embarrassment to downright dangerous.  Even some of the world's most famous and wealthy people are unwittingly caught by the press, exhibiting poor manners when on foreign soil.

Cultural difference, or an act of disrespect?  Korean newspapers attacked the brilliant, but obviously clueless, billionaire Bill Gates for his unaware and casual style, when he shook hands upon meeting the Korean President in 2013.  Photos of the meeting were splashed across the front pages of the country’s national newspapers.

Headlines splashed across the globe in April of 2013:

“Bill Gates ‘disrespects’ South Korea’s female president by shaking hands while keeping other in his pocket”!

Bill Gates found himself at the center of a cultural row last year, after he was accused of disrespecting the South Korean president by his 'rude' handshake. The Microsoft founder was heavily criticized by Korean media because he shook President Park Geun-hye's hand, while keeping his left in his trouser pocket.

The JoongAng newspaper wrote: 'Cultural difference, or an act of disrespect?' while others called it a 'disrespectful and casual handshake'.  A one-hand shake is often seen as disrespectful in South Korea and parts of Asia. It is normally reserved for someone younger or a good friend.  

'Perhaps it was his all-American style but an open jacket with hand in pocket? That was way too casual. It was very regretful,' Chung Jin-suk, secretary general at  the Korean National Assembly, was quoted by ABC News as saying.

Korean media reported that Gates has caused similar controversy in the past when meeting the country's leaders.  In 2002, Gates gave a two-handed shake to the late Kim Dae-jung but in 2008 gave President Lee Myung-Bak's a 'disrespectful' handshake. It has led to speculation in South Korea that it was done deliberately and reflects his political preference. 

Since he seems to do it so regularly, website “The Wire,” asked if the signature ‘Gates handshake’ was “Offensive, or Just Weird?”

So what does one do when worried that their manners may not be "A-OK?"  Below is just a short list of countries and behavior one may want to consider before traveling.

Okay in the U.S. and U.K., this “A-ok’ or ‘OK’ sign is considered vulgar in Greece, Turkey and many Latin American countries.

Pointing with your finger is rude in so many countries, it is smart to abandon the gesture altogether. Use an open hand, palm up, to indicate direction.

In Japan, it is impolite not to bow lower than the other person when greeting or thanking them.  It is also polite table manners in Japan to slurp your soup.  It indicates to your host that you are enjoying the meal.
 

“In la bise, the kisses (for there should be at least two) are aimed at alternate cheeks. The online experts cannot seem to agree on which cheek gets the first bise. The thing they all agree about is that the lips doing the kissing remain closed. No slobbering – ça ne se fait pas. Strangely, nobody mentions the importance of holding one’s breath while kissing – nobody wants your garlic fumes.

The number (from two to four or even, I am told, five in Corsica) depends less on the degree of affection or acquaintance than on the region. I even found a map of France on the web, showing the number of kisses current in each region. Someone probably got a Master’s thesis out of that.” –Rosy Rabson for The Telegraph

A handshake can also be a faux pas in France if a kiss on the cheek would have been more appropriate. 

Shoes and feet can be a serious source of offense in different parts of the world. Not taking shoes off in Maori or Muslim sacred spaces is very rude.

In Finland and Scandinavian countries, not removing shoes when entering someone's home is seen as very discourteous to one's hosts. 

Clothes are also very important in temples and churches. People should not enter a church in Italy with bare legs or arms and that rule generally applies to other religions. The Vatican even has a dress code and those not adhering to it, will be asked to leave.

In Buddhist temples, it is important to sit with feet tucked under so that they do not point at the Buddha.

Oprah Winfrey inadvertently managed to anger an entire nation when visiting India. Winfrey dined with a family in Mumbai while the cameras for her show rolled. While on-camera, Oprah remarked, “I heard some Indian people eat with their hands still.” Innocent as the remark may have been, it sparked outrage as some felt she was accusing the Indian people of somehow being “backward.” Oprah then added insult to injury by continuing to use her left hand to eat even after being told that the Indian people eat only with their right hands and that left hands are used only for serving. When Oprah’s hosts politely reminded her of this, she seemingly blew off the instructions and replied, “So I'm going to use both hands, or I’ll be here all night.”

Eating with your left hand (aka 'the unclean hand') in India and Middle Eastern countries is considered rude. That part of the body is used for an entirely different function in such places, one that most people don't want to be reminded of when dining. 

A pat on the head is considered an affectionate gesture in much of the Western world, but is extremely rude in Thailand, and in other Asian cultures. In Buddhism the head is the most pure region of the body. 

In the UK and America, the popular “okay” sign is a positive gesture, but if in Greece or Turkey, it is seen as very vulgar.   In France, it can mean “zero” or "nothing."

Giving a clock or a watch as a gift in China or Taiwan may be regarded as a faux-pas, as it traditionally associated with counting the seconds to the recipient's death.

On Bowing in Japan

Japanese social media loved Barack Obama's deep bow  to the Japanese Emperor in 2009, however mixing a handshake with the bow was an etiquette misstep.

Bowing is considered extremely important in Japan, so much so that, although children normally begin learning how to bow from a very young age, companies commonly provide training to their employees in how to execute bows correctly. It is, after all, the feature of Japanese etiquette that is best known outside Japan.

Basic bows are performed with the back straight and the hands at the sides (boys and men) or clasped in the lap (girls and women) and always, regardless of sex, with the eyes down. 

Bows originate at the waist. Generally, the longer and deeper the bow, the stronger the emotion and the respect expressed.

Bows can be generally divided into three main types: informal, formal, and very formal. Informal bows are made at about a fifteen degree angle or just tilt over one's head to the front, and more formal bows at about thirty degrees. Very formal bows are deeper.

–Compiled from a variety of sources including Mail Online and The Telegraph

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia