Rules Given for Hat Etiquette

With dressmaker ensembles bonnets, halo hats, cavalier, or any soft shapes are suitable.      

A prominent type designer gives a group of rules for hat etiquette, which should prove helpful to the autumn hat purchaser. For sportswear, the fedora or Breton sailor are advocated. Tailored street wear requires the pillbox, or the sailor type hat.

With dressmaker ensembles bonnets, halo hats, cavalier, or any soft shapes are suitable. Small or tall hats in the same styles suitable for dressmaker clothes are to be worn with fur coats.— By a Designer The Vanguard, 1940

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Antique Silver as Wedding Gift

When afternoon tea became a regular social event, not only was tea served, but so was coffee, and in the winter, hot chocolate. In the summer, hosts and hostesses were expected to offer lemonade, as well as the tea and coffee, until iced tea made its appearance in the U.S. via the 1904 World’s Fair. This is a depiction of a French silver tea service. It is complete with a coffee pot, a tea pot and a hot chocolate pot in the center.  It is rare to find such complete sets nowadays in antique stores. Most of the pots have been separated from one another. It is still the custom in the United States to offer coffee, as well as tea, at afternoon tea events.

Q.-The daughter of a very dear friend of mine is to be married. I am alone and have quantities of lovely silver, much of which has interesting history back of it. I would like to give her a beautiful solid silver tea service, a wedding present sent me from abroad. Or do you think I should buy a modern piece for her? —Mrs. Myrna B.

A.-Your friend's daughter would indeed be fortunate to receive such a lovely gift. And if she has good taste and values the friendship between you and her mother, she will be thrilled beyond measure and treasure your present. The modern cannot be mentioned in the same breath with the beautiful old things, such as silver and linens.— From “The Log of Life” column in the San Pedro News Pilot, 1943

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Nell Drake on Manners, 1943

At a perfectly managed wedding, the bride arrives exactly one minute after the hour to give a last comer time to find a place. 

1. CAN YOU GIVE ME the details of etiquette at lunches?- N.D.G., Eagle Rock

Men leave their coats and hats in the hall; women leave heavy outer wraps in the hall or dressing room, but always go into the drawing room with their hats and gloves on. They wear their fur neckpieces and carry their muffs in their hands, if they choose, or they leave them in the hall or dressing room. 

But women of best taste never take off their hats. Even the hostess herself almost invariably wears a hat at a formal luncheon in her own house, though there is no reason why she should not be hatless if she prefers, or if she thinks she is prettier without! Guests, however, do not take off their hats at a lunch party even in the country. They take off their gloves at the table, or sooner if they choose.

2. WHAT IS CONSIDERED a perfectly managed wedding?- T.C., Santa Monica.

At a perfectly managed wedding, the bride arrives exactly one minute after the hour to give a last comer time to find a place. Two or three servants have been sent ahead to wait in the vestibule to help the bride and bridesmaids off with their wraps and hold them until they are needed after the ceremony.

The groom’s mother and father also are waiting in the vestibule. As the auto of the bride's mother drives up, an usher goes as quickly as he can to tell the groom. Any brothers or sisters of the bride or groom, who are not to take part in the wedding procession and have arrived in their mother’s automobile, are now taken by ushers to their places in the front pews. Then the wedding ceremony begins. 

3. WHAT GOES INTO the making of a really successful saleswoman?-C.B, Los Angeles.

Really great saleswomen have not only cultivated an expert knowledge of the commodities they sell, but an equally expert ability to appraise the customers to whom they sell. It is essential to know, therefore, whether a customer likes to be “dearied” or “madamed,” or chatted to about every topic under the sun to camouflage the sales talk; and whether she is one who likes to have her mind made up for her, or whether she is one who, knowing exactly what she wants, prefers to have her own questions answered intelligently, but does not want any unasked for advice.

But above all saleswomen, the one an intelligent customer is certain to like best... the one in-fact to whom she always returns, is one who listens to what she says and tries to give her what she wants, instead of trying to sell her what the store seems eager to be rid of.– By Nell Drake, L.A. Daily News, 1943

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

10 More Etiquette Tips of 1940

The salt and pepper shakers should be removed from the dinner table on a tray with the rest of the food from the preceding course, before the dessert is brought in.

1. The salt and pepper shakers should be removed from the dinner table on a tray with the rest of the food from the preceding course, before the dessert is brought in.
2. You may serve the guests first or not at your dinner, as you wish. However, if the dish being served is unusual, or if the guests may not know how much of it to take, a good idea is for the hostess to be served first and the guests can follow her example. 
3. The general rule (with American dining) when serving a meal is that everything is served and removed from the left except beverages and extra silver, which are placed at the right.
4. When two men are dining in a restaurant, each gives his order to the waiter, even it one is the guest of the other.
5. If a girl and man are waiting for a cab, the girl should let the man hail it when it comes.
6. Children should be cautioned about blocking the sidewalks with their roller skating, marble playing, rope skipping and other activities. or of bumping into passing adults. It is never too early to teach youngsters consideration for others the foundation of good citizenship. 
7. Listen to your own voice and intonations. It is not only pleasing, but it is good manners to speak pleasantly in a low, quiet voice, which can be acquired if you will but watch your tones and lower those high notes to make them clearly audible but pleasantly low pitched. A pleasant cordial voice will help you win friends.
8. When leaving a large tea or reception it is not necessary to go to the receiving line and say goodbye before leaving. 
9. A mother does not give a bridal shower for a daughter, or a sister for her sister. If mother or sister wish to entertain for the bride-to-be. They may provide material for something for the new home, like tea towels or napkins, and let the guests work on them, but not expect said guests to bring gifts.
10. On the wedding day, the bride either leaves her engagement ring at home or wears it on her right hand, as the wedding ring should not be put on over the engagement ring. 

From the “Grab Bag” feature in the Imperial Valley Press, 1940

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

10 Etiquette Tips of 1940

To help children acquire poise and ease of manner at the table, they should be given a reasonable amount of attention. They should be encouraged to join in the general conversation and not rudely interrupted, or how can they learn to listen attentively and politely to others? 

 Hints on Etiquette from 1940

1. Ice cream served à la mode (on pie) is eaten with a fork. 
2. The bride rides to church in the car with her father, not with the bridesmaid or with her husband-to-be. 
3. To help children acquire poise and ease of manner at the table, they should be given a reasonable amount of attention. They should be encouraged to join in the general conversation and not rudely interrupted, or how can they learn to listen attentively and politely to others? 
4. It is the woman's place to proffer her hand to a man if she wishes to shake hands with him. However, if the man is used to shaking hands at meeting, and holds out his hand, she should shake hands with him even if she didn't intend to. 
5. You can train yourself to be a good mixer if you make a habit of always being interested in other people and showing it by your speech and actions.
6. Talk of one's personal problems and woes in public places, and in a tone of voice which easily carries to those within range, is never good taste. 
7. When you have finished your soup, if it is served in a regular soup bowl, wide and shallow, put the spoon in the bowl itself when you have finished. When eating soup out of a bouillon cup, however, put the spoon in the saucer or plate in which the cup stands.
8. It is good manners as well as good morals to suppress any unpleasant thing you may have heard of a person and tell those which are pleasant and to their credit. 
9. It is not considered good manners to smoke while dancing.
10. Ushers at a church wedding should be at the church about an hour before the time set for the ceremony. 

From the “Grab Bag” feature in the Imperial Valley Press, 1940

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia