A Royal Nursery in Spain

An engagement card featured Alfonso in uniform with his helmet and sword and his then fiancé, Victoria Eugenie. The Spanish Royal Court was considered the most confining in the world concerning etiquette, far surpassing the French Royal Court’s strict etiquette at Versailles. Evidently, the Royal nursery was the only area not controlled by a detailed list of rules of Royal decorum.  — “People who know Spain from books will tell you with bated breath of the cast-iron etiquette that surrounds the royal personage of Spain, of dreadful dinners eaten in solemn silence, of bows to the left and curtsies to the right, of mace-bearers and cup-bearers and sword-bearers, of orders of precedence...”

A Royal Nursery

The little heir to the Spanish throne has begun his babyhood in a suite of rooms arranged entirely after the fancy of his royal mother. Spanish etiquette requires her to conform to ideas other than her own on most points, but in the fitting of the nursery her word is law. The furnishing, decorating and entire arrangement are English, and offer everything that could possibly conduce to a baby’s health and happiness. The suite, directly over the Queen’s apartments, on the sunny side of the palace, consists of living room, dining room, bedrooms for the baby and head nurse, bath and sewing room. The living room is decorated in green and white, with showers of pink rosettes. 

The vaulted celling is enamelled in white, and round the walls runs a frieze of animals in Noah’s Ark-like procession. Eight green shades temper the sunshine. The angles of furniture walls are all softly rounded; so the approved method of standing a naughty child in the corner face to the wall could hardly be adopted in this case. With the exception of the rose colored English carpets, everything in the suite is washable. The wide window sills are coziily cushioned; an iron lattice, light and lacelike, but very strong, secures the windows from without. In the bedroom, three large paintings represent “Morning.” “Noon” and “Night.” The first is a sunshiny picture of a baby awakening in his little bed. "Noon” shows him busy with porringer and spoon: and in “Night” he has folded his chubby hands in prayer before going to sleep. The woodwork is white enamelled, and round the celling a frieze of dancing children charms the eye, as do the exquisite tint and design of the blue and white tiling of the fireplace. 

The little Prince sleeps in the cradle that rocked father and grandfather before him. It is a stately affair, resting on four Corinthian supports. It was formerly curtained in the richest lace, flowing from beneath a Spanish crown, but the young Queen mother had the crown removed, lest it fall and injure the royal sleeper below; and the lace curtains were, suppressed to allow freer access of air. The cradle linen shows embroidery of fairy like fineness, the other coverlets being sewn with butterflies and roses in white silk. The dining room furniture is white mahogany, with the royal arms of Spain skillfully inlaid in each piece. Throughout simplicity and good taste distinguish this ideal dwelling for a young child. The rooms are considered the best ventilated in all Madrid, for the young Queen inherits her love of fresh air from her illustrious grandmother, the late Queen Victoria of England.—Youth’s Companion, 1907

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia©️ Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Spanish Royal Birth Etiquette

“If the child is a boy, the Spanish flag will be hoisted on the Palace and a salute of twenty-one guns will be fired. If it is a girl, a white flag will be run up and a salute of fifteen guns will be fired. If the event occurs at night, an electric light in the national colors will he displayed on the Palace for a boy, and of white light for a girl.”

As Stork Arrives, Guns Will Roar – Royalty to Welcome the New Heir 

Elaborate Preparations Being Made to Receive the Future Prince or Princess of the Spanish Throne

MADRID, April 4.— The royal decree just issued, with the details of the ceremony of the presentation of the heir to the Spanish throne at the moment of its birth, prescribes that the court officials shall be present, also the ministers, the presidents of the two chambers, the Knights of the Golden Fleece, the captain general, the commission of the Asturias and representatives of civil and military corporations. Members of the diplomatic corps will also be invited to attend the ceremony.

If the child is a boy, the Spanish flag will be hoisted on the Palace and a salute of twenty-one guns will be fired. If it is a girl, a white flag will be run up and a salute of fifteen guns will be fired. If the event occurs at night, an electric light in the national colors will he displayed on the Palace for a boy, and of white light for a girl. All of the customary decrees ordering a general amnesty, the release of prisoners condemned for minor offenses and the bestowal of recompenses and decorations upon various persons have been prepared.

How Guests Will Dress

The decree directs attention to the remarkable publicity given in accordance with the etiquette of the Spanish court to the intimate affairs of the Royal family. As soon as evident signs of approaching confinement are noticed, those invited to attend the ceremony must hasten to the Palace, the men attired in uniform and the women in court dress.They must wait in the ante chamber until the infant is presented. 

With the least possible delay the baby is dressed and placed in a basket standing on a golden salver. The King takes the basket, holding the child in his hands and followed by members of the Royal family, enters in where the presentation ceremony is held. Raising the veil over the infant's face, the King says:

“I present to you my beloved son or daughter, the successor to the throne of Spain, the Prince, or Princess of the Asturias, to whom my dear spouse has just given birth.”

Then the Minister of Justice as the principal notary of the realm approaches and views the face of the child and all those invited file past. As soon as the presentation is ended. a solemn Te Deum is sung in the royal chapel. – By the Associated Press, April 1907

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Royal Baby Surnames

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and their children. – Photo courtesy of Herald Mail

Prince Louis Arthur Charles Will Not Have a Last Name, ... but here are a few options in case he decides to use one: Mountbatten is Prince Phillip's surname, and Queen Elizabeth II's grandfather, King George V, took on Windsor—after Windsor Castle—as the British royal family's official surname in 1917, as Saxe-Coburg-Gotha sounded “too German” during World War I.

Most families pass down a last name from one generation to the next, but the British royal family follows their own rules and traditions. They have formal titles (some are made up of up to 15 words), but tend to only use Prince or Princess in front of their given name. However, following the birth of Prince William and Kate Middleton's third child, Prince Louis Arthur Charles, many are curious as to whether he will adopt the surname the descendants of Prince Phillip and Queen Elizabeth often use on certain occasions: Mountbatten-Windsor.

Royal historian, author and blogger of  “Royal Musings,” Marlene Eilers Koenig, said the baby will not. “The royal baby will not have a last name,” Koenig tells TownandCountrymag.com. “The name on the birth certificate will say HRH Prince or Princess, and all three names of Cambridge.” HRH is an abbreviation for His or Her Royal Highness. The three names of Cambridge refers to the three first names given to each royal child. For instance, Prince George’s three first names are George Alexander Louis, and Princess Charlotte's three first names are Charlotte Elizabeth Diana.

“The House name is Windsor and the family name for those who do use a surname is Mountbatten-Windsor,” Koenig adds. Mountbatten is Prince Phillip's surname, and Queen Elizabeth II's grandfather, King George V, took on the name “Windsor” —after Windsor Castle—as the British royal family's official surname in 1917. 

Prince George, the royal baby's oldest sibling, is listed at school with the surname Cambridge, which is part of his father and mother's official titles as the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. Prince William and Prince Harry similarly adopted part of their father's title as their last name when they enlisted in the military under William Wales and Harry Wales, The Independent reports. Prince Charles is, of course, the Prince of Wales.– Town and Country Magazine, 2018

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Victorian Nursery Etiquette

In honor of the new royal baby…

In July of 1929, the Duke and Duchess of York have a “Tea Party” with Princess Elizabeth in the Nursery 

JEAN PAUL RICHTER, in his great work on education (Levana), intimates that we scarcely realize the momentous possibilities that lie all about us folded up in the heart of childhood, as the blushing petals of the beauteous blossom yet to be lie folded close within the sheltering calyx.

"Do you know," he queries, "whether the little boy who plucks flowers at your side may not one day, from his island of Corsica, descend as a war-god into a stormy universe to play with hurricanes for destruction, or to purify and plant the world with harvests?" And just because we do not know the extent of these possibilities, children must be carefully trained to fill whatever post or province may be theirs in the time to come.

Now, they are in our hands to mold as we will; then, they will be the masters, and much of the character of their sway will depend upon the guidance of the present. Viewed in this light, the manners and the morals of children, closely associated as they are, become of the greatest importance to the world.

The younger baby pictured here was called George VI as King 

Power of Example

Teach the embryo man or woman, in the nursery, the traits, the habits, the customs of the best etiquette, and you have stamped upon them, at an age when the character is impressible as wax, not only the outer semblance, but, in a great degree, the inner reality, of a true man or woman.

Let the children grow up in a home where rude gestures, or ill-tempered words are unknown, where truthfulness, kindliness, forgetfulness of self and careful consideration of others, permeates the very atmosphere, and they will go forth into the world armed with the integrity in which all men may trust, the polish that will win them admiration, and the true refinement that will render their friendship elevating.

See, also, that there is perfect unanimity between the parents as to the government and instruction of the children in the household, and, if any difference should arise, it should be settled in private. Children, being strongly imitative, are best taught by example. Never reprove unless absolutely necessary, and never let the voice rise excitedly to ensure obedience. By keeping your own voice low and calm, you do much toward lowering the key of their high-pitched, childish treble, and soothing the troubled waters of their  souls.

Keeping Promises

Never permit yourself to threaten where you do not perform; children are quick to learn the value of your promises, and place very accurate estimates, in their own minds, as to what their parents will, or will not do under given circumstances. Absolute truthfulness can never be taught a child by precept, when by constant example he is taught that the word of his parents has little or no value in his own case, so far as threats and punishments, or even rewards, extend. If a punishment is the penalty for a broken law, see that it is inflicted; if a reward is promised, be sure that it is given.

Enjoin upon children strict justice in their dealings one with another, even in their games, never allowing the stronger to impose upon the weak, but teaching forbearance and tenderness in all their actions.

Talebearing

Discourage, as far as possible, all talebearing in the home, and, as a rule, do not listen to complaints, and long recitals of injuries received from little playfellows. Care in this respect will nip in the bud the tendency toward exaggeration and talebearing that so early develops in a child, and so soon matures into the "gossip" of riper years. This demand for exactitude in childish statements will pave the way for strictly truthful declarations in the more important affairs of later life, redounding thus to the lasting benefit of the individual and the community.

Truthfulness

The least approach toward prevarication, or concealment of their childish misdemeanors, should be treated as a grave fault. To prevent, as far as possible, all attempts at disguising the truth, penalties for faults should rarely be of so severe a nature that the little transgressor resorts to evasion through fear of the consequences.

Respectfulness

Children should be taught to be respectful toward their parents and others older than themselves, to be polite towards those of their own age, and very thoughtful for the comfort of the sick and weak. Respect must also be shown toward servants and dependents, and no unnecessary demands made upon their time or services.

Queen Victoria with Edward VIII 

Obedience

Prompt obedience should always be demanded of a child, and the spirit of murmuring and questioning firmly repressed. None can command except they have first learned to obey.

Do not allow children to tease, nor, having once refused on good and sufficient ground, suffer your consent to be gained by siege. Make your refusal final, but do not refuse thoughtlessly, or for mere caprice. The wishes of a child are as real to him as those of grown people are to them.

Manner of Address

Rudeness and abruptness must never be tolerated in the manners of a child. “Yes,” and “no,” in reply, and “what?” in interrogatory, are uncouth and disagreeable in sound. “Yes, sir,” “Yes, ma'am,” and “What, ma'am,” are much better substituted, but even these are open to criticism. English etiquette relegates “Sir” and “Ma'am” to the use of servants, save in case of addressing the higher nobility when “Sir is sometimes used.

The Nursery

The better and more graceful etiquette of the day would teach a child to say, “Yes, mamma,” “No, papa;” or a student at school to address the teachers as, “Yes, Prof. Stanley,” “No, Miss Livingstone.” If they fail to understand a remark, a quick, “Beg pardon,” or, “I beg your pardon,” or even, “I did not understand,” can soon be taught to even childish lips and never be forgotten as they advance to maturity. The use of “Please,” and “Thank you,” or, “I thank you,” (never the thankless “Thanks,”) should be early impressed upon their minds.

Teach them never to speak of grown people without prefixing “Mr.”, “Mrs.”, or “Miss,” to their name. It is very objectionable for a child to fall into the habit of saying “Brown did so and so,” instead of, “Mr. Brown, etc…” Insist, too, that at school they shall never say “Teacher,” but address their preceptor by his proper name.

Impress upon children that they must answer politely when spoken to, but strictly repress any tendency on their part toward questioning visitors at the house. Here let it be added, for the benefit of their elders, that nothing can be a surer evidence of ill-breeding than for a grown person to question a child in regard to his family affairs.

Queen Elizabeth with Prince Philip, young Charles and Baby Anne 

Interrupting Conversations

Never permit children to interrupt the conversation of their elders, and see, as a preparation for this, that among the little ones themselves, one who has a story to tell is permitted to finish without an impatient brother or sister breaking in with his, or her, version of the same tale. See that each has his turn and many of the noisy disagreements of the playroom will thus be done away with.

Insist, too, upon the lowering of each eager little voice, and a long step will have been taken toward doing away with the high-keyed voices and the all-talking-together habits that afflict so many of their elders.

See, too, that the children, while not allowed to interrupt the conversation of grown persons, receive in some degree the same consideration from them. In other words, let the children talk sometimes, and listen to them sincerely and respectfully. There is no better way to train a child in courtesy than to observe toward it the most scrupulous politeness, and a child whose own conversation is respected can be easily taught to respect the conversation of others, and to know when to talk and when to be silent.

This habit of listening, inculcated in childhood, will do much toward forming agreeable members of society in after years. If a guest should converse with a child for a moment, watch that it does not make itself tiresome by engaging his or her entire attention.

“Showing Off”

Never "show off" children to visitors. It fosters in them a feeling of vanity, and is often very tedious to the persons upon whom it is inflicted, it being barely possible that your own estimate of their brilliancy is not shared by outsiders.

Neither should strangers be allowed, under any circumstances, at home or abroad, to tease a child "just for fun." Its angry answers may be amusing, but the practice is one that works irreparable injury to the child. As soon as this tendency is discovered in a visitor, send the child quietly, but firmly, from the room, remarking casually, when it is gone, "that children are apt to be troublesome when they talk too much."

“Visiting”

Children should not be allowed to "visit" other children solely upon the request of the children. The invitation should come from the parents. Otherwise great annoyance may result from such unconsidered calls.

Do not take children while making formal visits. They are often an annoyance, and always a check upon conversation. If they must be taken, do not allow them to meddle with anything in the room, nor to interrupt the conversation. Neither should they be permitted to handle the belongings, or finger the attire, of callers at the house. Do not take them to art galleries, artist's or sculptor's studios, and never allow them to meddle with goods in stores.

Queen Elizabeth at her Christening 

– From the book “Social Life, by Maud C. Cooke”

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institure of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia