Much Rudeness at 1884 Ball

 “… the young men should remember that much confusion on the dancing floor is caused by long delays when partners are called...”  A scene from a ball in HBO’s “The Gilded Age,” ~ Image Source Pinterest

A Reprehensible Practice at a Leap Year Dance

One of the noticeable features of the evening was the frequency with which the gentlemen retired to the dressing-rooms o adjust their silk hose. This in itself very well and proper, but the young men should remember that much confusion on the dancing floor is caused by long delays when partners are called. Several times during the night the gentlemen were not on hand promptly, and the generally good natured ladies were offended and in some cases even angry. 

There is another point of etiquette which was over-looked on the part of the gentlemen. At midnight we chanced near a young fellow elegantly dressed in brocaded silk. A lady stepped up and asked: “May I see you to supper?” “Oh, how nice; but mamma says I must take the children,” replied the thoughtless male. “How many?” “Six” “The suffering Moses: Do you take me for a bank?” “Oh, I don't know.” “But I do, and blast me if I'll ever have any six dirty brats toddling after me. Not much and the offended girl walked indignantly off.”

Again we must repeat that the management is not at fault; what few hitches there were during the program are to be credited only either to the innate depravity or unthinking blunders of some who smuggled themselves past the police guardian at the door, As for him, we recommend This removal from the force; for it is his business to know people and to shut out those not moving in society circles. – In the Stockton Mail, Boston, 1884

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Gilded Age Fad of Young Men

There is a whole science to selecting rings for different fingers according to many online sources – Image source, Pinterest

A Young Man's Rings

Have you noticed the hands of the young man who is only swagger, not quite well-bred? He wears rings and rings – not one, or two, or even three, but six and seven, and he wears them just as his women friends do, clear up to the knuckle of the third and fourth fingers of both hands. 

Some of them are of gold and some of silver or platinum, and occasionally one sees a thin, dark band that means iron, and they are set with all kinds of stones, sometimes a diamond, sometimes a turquoise, perhaps an emerald, or a ruby, or a sapphire. 

And the young man who wears all these finger adornments always rides in the elevated cars without his gloves, and the young lady clerk sits opposite him and counts, and wonders and admires.-N. Y. Evening Sun, 1890

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🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Gilded Age Etiquette for Bachelors

“Horse Show At Madison Squre Garden 1895”, by A.B. Wenzell

From the Men’s Section

Our men have, most of them, been well and correctly garbed during our horse show, and have many of them established the reputation of being excellent whips. In England at a recent “hunting breakfast” the table was wonderfully effective. Top boots held the flowers at opposite corners, a hunting cap formed the centerpiece, and was of a bright color; across it was a crop gracefully arranged. The cap had a tin lining and held “blackberries cut in long trails, hawthorn berries and shaded chrysanthemums.” The spurred boots were filled with the richest of crimson chrysanthemums and were slightly splashed with mud; horns, horseshoes and hurdles were arranged about the table in an artistic way. The designer advises that real bits, horns and shoes be always used. 

The fad of collecting old and unusual furniture and historical bits of silver is much indulged in by many of our bachelors, who show good taste in their selections. Men who have little “shooting boxes” should avoid when furnishing having too much furniture and should eschew all light and flimsy articles, having everything solid, practical and comfortable. It is nonsense to fit up a country home in city style.

At the New York Horse Show a few men showed a tendency to appear in very gay waistcoats. Tan and leather ones were popular. Ascot and Teck ties were universally seen and red prevailed, and real yellow gloves were seen in the morning, but of course, the evening saw every one in evening dress. Vogue remarks: “The collars this year are straight and standing; the all-round turned-down collar is still very popular. Otherwise everywhere there is a disposition to dress less and to avoid conventionalities, and I regret to see it. 

I shall always be an apostle of dress, and I believe firmly in its inexorable etiquette. There can be no mixing of matters. We must either dress to suit the occasion or we must abandon all hope of being considered gentlemanly. The present revolution in dress is arrant socialism. I am not in favor of it, and I shall fight against it.” – San Francisco Call, 1895

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia