Gilded Age Menu Etiquette

“Escargots” sounds more palatable than “snails,” oui? – For well over a century and a half, the etiquette has been that formal dinner menu cards in the United States are to be written in French. This rule remains in many etiquette books today, although White House State Dinners, under the Clinton Administration, dropped the French menu terminology in the 1990’s and began listing the foods in English.

 French Food Names

It is unfortunate that a prejudice exists against the high-sounding names given to some delicious dishes of a simple character. Naturally, Americans would prefer to see all titles written in the English language, but the fact that a French name has been applied for convenience should not deter people from reading a receipt and ascertaining the nature of the dish to be made by following it. Most of the formidable titles with which one meets, have been given to commemorate the inventors of the dishes or some popular place. An example is “Fillet of beef à la Chateaubriand,” which stands for tenderloin steak, served with a rich, brown sauce – an excellent dish. 

One of the most delicious sauces for fish, Bechamel sauce, is probably not nearly so well known as it would be, but for its French name; yet it is simple and exceedingly useful. As said above, then, a foreign name should be no bar to experiments, for the English equivalent or interpretation might be absurdly long and complicated, and the dish would be none the simpler. 

Speaking of sauce brings to mind the old saying, that “the sauce makes the pudding.” It may be added that it makes the fish and meat, also. Fish always requires a sauce to bring out its best flavor; nevertheless, the art of making sauces is not extensively cultivated. It should be, in company with the making of soups and salads and good bread, the cooking of fish, meats and vegetables, and last, though certainly not least, the making of a cup of perfect tea or coffee.— Good Housekeeping, 1885

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19th C. White House Etiquette

Guests to the White House should really keep their hands to themselves. “Inquisitive people often like to study the upholstery, perhaps, and they forget to replace the shams. The shelf ornaments may take their fancy, and they sometimes fail to restore things to the condition in which they were left at the dictation of the President’s aesthetic taste. In this democratic age, few people are aware of the grandeur to be seen in the home of the Chief Ruler of the nation.”
 U.S. President Chester A. Arthur, 1881-1885
- photo source US News and World Report 

Some Presidential Habits

President Arthur pays attention to every little detail of household decoration. He continually wants this or that article of furniture shifted about, to change the appearance of things. He is particular even to the exact angle at which the corner pieces of furniture rest, and on Mondays, when the rules he has made for the White House exclude visitors, it is his custom to inspect the house throughout and see that everything is in order. A reception is apt to leave some things topsy-turvy. 

Inquisitive people often like to study the upholstery, perhaps, and they forget to replace the shams. The shelf ornaments may take their fancy, and they sometimes fail to restore things to the condition in which they were left at the dictation of the President’s aesthetic taste. In this democratic age, few people are aware of the grandeur to be seen in the home of the Chief Ruler of the nation. 

The state dining room is the room in which the President entertains at table the distinguished guests. No matter whom it may be he is entertaining, the President is always served first. He sits at the centre of one side of the long table, his wife, if he be married, directly opposite him. It sometimes happens that the Secretary of State will be seated in the chair usually assigned to the President’s wife. After the President has been served, White House etiquette requires that the lady sitting next the President on his right, and then the lady on his left, be served before any others. Then the President’s wife is waited upon, and afterward the gentlemen immediately on her right and left, in the order named. Then the other guests follow. 

Whenever the table is set for a dinner, the large brass plateau is set for sixteen feet along the table, which was imported from France during the administration of President Monroe, is filled with fruits, flowers and French candies. In the centre, directly in front of the President, is placed a full rigged floral ship, which was sent to President Garfield at the time of the last inauguration by a Boston florist. The flowers are renewed from the White House conservatory. When the chandeliers and candelabra are lighted, and other effects produced to heighten the scene, the spectator is apt to think of the regal festivities of some other land than free America. 

Across the wide hall or corridor, which extends from the East Room to the large plant conservatory at the west end of the house, I was shown into the private dining room of the President. There I saw the handsome buffet and the sideboard which Mrs. Hayes had made during her stay in the While House. The buffet was ornamented with pretty platters and dishes finished from designs of Theodore Davis, the New York artist. The scene depicted upon each dish suggests a story of some kind. 

In the drawers of the sideboard is kept the White House silverware. The gold spoons which President Van Buren purchased are still here. They are said to have defeated him when he ran a second time for the Presidency. Some of the silverware I saw, Crump said, was seventy years old, and the side tables in the room have done duty for sixty five years. The President often entertains his company in this private dining room. Then the upper gas jets are lighted, and the eight candelabra, four of silver and four of brass, are distributed on the table and about the room, the reflectors all being so colored, as to impart a deep rosy tint to the scene. Sixteen pounds of candles are used to carry out this system of lighting by candelabra.

It may be of interest to some people to know the hours meals are served at the White House. During the Hayes’ administration, breakfast was served at 8:30 o'clock, lunch at 1:00 and dinner at 6:00. When President Garfield became the host, the hours were (an Ohio idea) changed, breakfast was ready at 7:30. dinner at 3:00 and tea at 7:00. President Arthur is not regular as to any meal except dinner, which is served at 8 o’clock in the evening (a metropolitan ideal). He is not an early riser, and it is not unusual for his breakfast to be as late as 10:30 o'clock. A cup of coffee is always relished by him at this meal. 

He rarely resigns himself to slumber till 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning, and five or six hours are all he requires for rest. How he maintains good health under the heavy strain of so many hours of activity is a question that troubles his friends. He is fond of the delicacies of the season, and his table is the least expensive of the various drafts upon his purse. — Cleveland Herald, 1882

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Washington Ladies’ Code of Etiquette

This photo of Mrs. Grover Cleveland along with the wives of her husband’s Cabinet Secretaries, was taken in 10 years after this article was published, in 1897. –  The ladies' visiting code admits of great latitude, and rules must be observed to avoid complications... Many compromising episodes result through lack of “time” and method. Not long ago a new member of official society, with ambition to call where the largest number of carriages were seen, found herself at a funeral! 

The ladies' code of etiquette in Washington D.C. is complicated, and it is important to be understood. Ladies of the Diplomatic Corps receive first visits from official society, and duly return the same in good form. There is a friction between Senate ladies and Cabinet ladies regarding first calls, but the common law of custom exists, and should be gracefully accepted. There was more excuse for sensitiveness during the present administration than has existed before. The Cabinet ladies were entirely new members of Washington society, excepting the honored and beloved wife of the Secretary of State, who was called to a higher court before social etiquette of the new administration was established, and naturally they felt the newness of their position, and, from a home point of view, regarded it etiquette for the older members of society to make the first call upon the new, hence a conflict, without an authorized umpire to decide a vexed question.

The ladies' visiting code admits of great latitude, and rules must be observed to avoid complications. The old rule of fixed days in every part of the city was best. Why any innovation from the old rule is regarded with favor, I am unable to say; but if carriage hire has produced this result, let it be canceled by “Jeffersonian simplicity,” and ladies take time to enter and leave the house with formality due a hostess, and not pay visits as if life depended on the action. Many compromising episodes result through lack of “time” and method. Not long ago a new member of official society with ambition to call where the largest number of carriages were seen, found herself at a funeral. – Brooklyn Magazine, 1887

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Presidential Etiquette Privilege

Rank has its privilege, and for past Presidents, it offered even more –– “The President may walk where he pleases in the streets of Washington, meeting with no further notice than the tipping of the hat, unless of his own motion be stops to speak with someone.” 

The President In Public

It is a point of etiquette, universally observed at the national capital, never to obtrude attentions upon the President when he appears in public. On the street or in any place of amusement in Washington, the President has the undisputed privilege of appearing as any private citizen, he is never stared at unless it is by strangers, and his appearance in a theater is not greeted with any sort of demonstration. The President may walk where he pleases in the streets of Washington, meeting with no further notice than the tipping of the hat, unless of his own motion be stops to speak with someone. 

Office seekers and petitioners never venture to approach him on the street. His surest riddance of the importunities of the throng is to go out among them. Sir Julian Pauncefote, speaking of the American customs that had impressed him, remarked that, while a foreigner's first impression might be that the seeming indifference of the public toward the President when he appeared on the street or at the theater was the result of an exaggerated idea of democracy, it must become apparent on closer observation that it was the highest possible tribute of respect and consideration. —San Francisco Argonaut, 1899

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Presidential Theater Etiquette

President-elect attacks "Hamilton" saying Vice- President elect, Mike Pence, was 'harassed' by 'very rude' cast who stopped the show to confront VP sitting in the audience - 'We are the diverse America who are alarmed and anxious that your new administration will not protect us, our planet, our children'. Pence has been slammed for seeing the play, while the crowd booed him and his family. The booing was indeed harassment, but was the cast's plea, as well? Perhaps a more polite way to address Mr. Pence with their concerns, would have been to invite him and his family backstage to meet the cast after the show.

It is a point of etiquette, universally observed at the national capital, never to obtrude attentions upon the President when he appears in public. On the street or in any place of amusement in Washington, the President has the undisputed privilege of appearing as any private citizen, he is never stared at unless it is by strangers, and his appearance at a theater is not greeted with any sort of demonstration. 

The President may walk where he pleases in the streets of Washington, meeting with no further notice than the tipping of the hat, unless of his own motion he stops to speak with someone. Office seekers and petitioners never venture to approach him in the street. His surest riddance of the importunities of the throng is to go out among them. 

Sir Julian Pauncefote, speaking of the American customs that had impressed him, remarked that, while a foreigner's first impression might be that the seeming indifference of the public toward the President when be appeared on the street or at the theater was the result of an exaggerated idea of democracy, it must become apparent on closer observation that it was the highest possible tribute of respect and consideration. — San Francisco Argonaut, 1899

Etiquette Enthusiast Maura J Graber is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Washington Ladies' Etiquette Code

Known the country over as the most beautiful and influential woman there ever was in Washington, Kate Chase, occupied the most powerful position in Washington society that a woman could hold. She held sway in 19th Century Washington D.C., far beyond her gender at the time. 

Etiquette in Washington 

————— 

"The Ladies' Code"

The ladies' code is more complicated, and it is important to be understood. Ladies of the Diplomatic Corps receive first visits from official society, and duly return the same in good form. 

There is a friction between Senate ladies and Cabinet ladies regarding first calls, but the common law of custom exists, and should be gracefully, accepted. There was more excuse for sensitiveness during the present administration than has existed before. 

The Cabinet ladies were entirely new members of Washington society, excepting the honored and beloved wife of the Secretary of State, who was called to a higher court before social etiquette of the new administration was established, and naturally they felt the newness of their position, and, from a home point of view, regarded it etiquette for the older members of society to make the first call upon the new, hence a conflict, without an authorized umpire to decide a vexed question.

The ladies' visiting code admits of great latitude, and rules must be observed to avoid complications. The old rule of fixed days in every part of the city was best. Why any innovation from the old rule is regarded with favor, I am unable to say; but if carriage hire has produced this result, let it be canceled by "Jeffersonian simplicity," and ladies take time to enter and leave the house with formality due a hostess, and not pay visits as if life depended on the action. 

Many compromising episodes result through lack of "time" and method. Not long ago, a new member of official society with ambition to call where the largest number of carriages were seen, found herself at a funeral. — Brooklyn Magazine, April 1887

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Moderator and Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Question of Presidential Etiquette

Infanta Eulalia, Duchess of Galliera was the youngest daughter and child of Queen Isabella II of Spain and Francis, Duke of Cadiz, sister of King Alfonso XII and aunt of his son King Alfonso XIII. Very unconventional as a Spanish royal, on her visit to the US in 1893, she raised eyebrows by smoking. And rather than have mass in a luxurious Roman Catholic church cathedral, she attended mass in a poor parish. It was also reported that Eulalia even snubbed a social event to "eat sausages" at the Chicago World's Fair, just like a common attendee. According to www.EdwardianPromenade.com, "She later courted more controversy when she tried to divorce her husband, and when she became the official go-between for wealthy, social-climbing Americans and European noble families (the grateful Americans of course showered Eulalia with automobiles or the loaning of yachts)."

It's a Question of Etiquette

and a Matter of Form

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Infanta Situation 
"Bothering the Diplomats" 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shalt President Cleveland Return Eulalia's Visit? 

Now the Momentous Problem

Special to The Morning Call

Washington, May 14, 1893 — lt was learned to-day that the representatives of Spain and the United States have thus far failed to reach a satisfactory understanding regarding the programme of courtesies to be extended between the President and the Infanta Eulalia in the course of her stay in Washington.

According to custom, the Princess, at a convenient period after her arrival, would call upon the President and Mrs. Cleveland at the White House. Whether or not the President should in return call at the Princess's quarters in the hotel is the question, upon the settlement of which depends the future course of the Infanta.

The Spanish representatives, it is understood, insist that a return visit to the Princess is one that is due by courtesy and should be paid. They argue that the Princess is the personal representative of the Queen Regent, and will come to the United States upon the express invitation of Congress. Under these conditions, and these only, they feel that a return visit should be paid. 

If the Infanta were traveling through the country as a tourist merely, they say, she would pay her respects to the President, and no return visit from him would be expected. The Spanish officials are quoted as saying that the courtesy which should obtain among individuals of the same rank, and not etiquette, demands that the visit of the Infanta be reciprocated by the President.

The subject has been very thorougly discussed in Washington and Madrid, and a telegram from the latter capital printed. On Saturday morning, expressing the apprehension that the Infanta's health would not permit her to coutinue on her journey to the United States, is construed here as preparing the way for her return to Spain from Cuba if it should be found necessary to change tho original plan. The situation is embarrassing, and many plans have been made of expedients to relieve it. 

One of these, it is understood, was that the Infanta and her suite be entertained at the White House during her stay, thus obviating altogether the difficulty over the return visit. There is no precedent for the guidance of the officials here, as no one assuming to be the personal representative of a sovereign has ever visited this country.

Havana, May 14 .—The Infanta Eulalia and her husband attended a military review yesterday afternoon and in the evening went. to a ball at the Casino Espagnol: It is reported that she will embark to-morrow for New York. — San Francisco Call, 1893

Etiquette Enthusiast Maura J Graber is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Gilded Age Etiquette in Washington DC

Ida Saxton McKinley was the wife of the 25th President, William McKinley

"Notwithstanding the mid-Lenten season capital society is extremely busy exchanging courtesies with the newcomers in high places. The latter are beginning to realize the bitter-sweets of their position, for the polite tactics that govern the social side of all things official involve much downright hard work.

An immutable law of local etiquette requires the ladies of official families to see to it that their husband's or father's visiting cards, together with their own, are properly distributed within a given number of days, to everyone of the hundreds who have left addresses in the traditional peck measure of bits of Bristol board which every weekly reception brings. The value of a former residence in Washington, and the experience in its social requirements, which differ from those of any other city, is plainly to be seen in the present administration.

Mrs. McKinley is a charming example of this. She knows the natural interest in the nation's house and the president's wife, and she makes everybody welcome at all times and in the most informal fashion. It is already apparent that the White House will be much more accessible to the general public during this administration than the last. 

There will be a great many more receptions outside the official clique, and the whole mansion beyond the east room will not be so closed and guarded as formerly, as if each visiting stranger were a vandal bent on destruction or theft.

Mrs. Sherman, too. besides her many years as a senator's wife, has filled a position similar to that she now occupies when her husband was secretary of the treasury. The Longs, also the Algers, the Grays, and others in the present topmost circle have spent precious seasons in Washington, and are familiar with its peculiar social usages." —Special Correspondence to The Herald. WASHINGTON, D. C, March 30, 1897

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Gilded Age D.C. Society and Etiquette

Gilded Age Washington society life was one of granduer and continual entertainment and parties, even in the coldest of Washington DC months. The etiquette was rigid and all of the details were scrupulously covered in the press - nationally and internationally.

Washington Social Life

Dinner at the White House to the Diplomatic Corps., a Luncheon by Mrs. Leland Stanford, a Reception by Mr. and Mrs. A. C. Barney, and a Tea by the Corean Minister and Wife...

Washington, February 2, 1892-
The state dinner given at the White House tonight was in honor of the Diplomatic Corps, which august body of Ministers Plenipotentiary and Chargés d'Affaires was well represented. The dinner, as compared with that of last season, was attended by unusually large number of ladies of the Corps. The decorations in the East Room were on a more elaborate scale than at the dinner given to the Cabinet. A large oval basket of maidenhair fern, thickly studded with pink orchids of the variety Cattleya triannal, formed the centerpiece, on each side of which were semi-circular plates of ferns, surrounded by narrow gilt railing and filled with crotons, cypripediums, and dracenaes, from the middle of which rose the spiked leaves of variegated pineapple. At each end of the transverse sections of the table were oval baskets of ferns and Dendrobium nobilis orchids, flanked on the sides with smaller circular plats of ferns and different varieties of orchids.                              

Exotic flowers were en vogue and considered very proper for entertaining.

Boutonnieres for the gentlemen were of Dendrobium Wardianum. For the ladies, in place of the conventional bouquets, were Watteau bows of Heliotrope pink in the shade of the orchids. One end of the ribbon was painted in gold with the name of the guest, and on the other was engraved the front view of the White House and grounds. The guests were Secretary and Mrs. Blaine, Minister and Mme. Romero, Chargés d'Affaires of the Italian Legation; the Ministers of the Netherlands, Turkey, France, Austria-Hungary, Colombia, Switzerland, Argentine Republic, Belgium; Sweden, China, Portugal, Guatemala, Salvador, the Chargés d'Affaires of Russia, Spain, and Germany; Chargés d'Affaires of Costa Rica and Señora Calvo, Minister of Japan and Mme Tateno, the Hawaiian Minister and Mrs. Mott-Smith, the Corean Chargés d'Affaires and Mrs. Ye Cha Yun and Nicaraguan Minister and Mrs. Guzman.

Spiked leaves of variegated pineapple... No expense was spared for entertaining the Diplomatic Corps.

England was the only country not represented at the dinner, owing to the six weeks' mourning to be observed by the members of the legation for the late Duke of Clarence. There were also present the Haitian Minister, Senator and Mrs. Manderson, Senator and Mrs. Frye, Senator and Mrs. Sherman, Representative and Mrs. Blount, Representative and Mrs. Holman, Mrs. Russell, Mrs. Dimmick. Count and Countess Sponneck sent regrets in the afternoon upon receipt of a cablegram announcing the death of a near relative.
                                 

Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford, photographed with their son, Leland Stanford, Jr. on a trip to Paris in the 1880s. Their son died shortly after, and the Stanfords later founded Stanford University in his honor.

The most elegant luncheon of the season was the one given today by Mrs. Leland Stanford in honor of Mrs. Harrison. The long table was laid in the spacious blue and white banquet hall recently added to her residence on K St. In the bay window to the east, among the plants, was an aquarium filled with goldfish, with birds in cages on each side. From the white buffet and mantel hung the branches of branches of orange trees laden with fruit and tied with gold-colored ribbon. Over the cloth of blue and white brocaded satin damask at each end or squares of blue satin under lace on which rested gilt baskets on jonquils tied with yellow ribbon. Beyond these were low epergnes holding varieties of California fruit, single bunches of grapes filling flat cut-glass dishes. 

The centerpiece of lilies of the valley and yellow tulips filled a scalloped shell epergne of gold and silver, which restaurant on the silver-bordered mirror. At the end of each of this were silver and cut-glass stands of fresh strawberries. White tapers burned under white-and-gold shades. The flagons and wine glasses were Bohemian glass, beautifully decorated in figures and flowers. Souvenirs of the luncheon were card cases of different colors in satin, on the cover of which, and gold lettering, was the name of the guest. A service of repoussé gold was used at the first course. About the room were groups and figures of marble statuary, while the walls were hung with valuable paintings.

“A service of repoussé gold was used at the first course.” Repoussé flatware remains a popular choice for hosts and hostesses today.

The guests at lunch and were Mrs. Harrison, Mrs. Morton, Mrs. Elkins, Mrs. Noble, Mme. Romero, Mrs. Schofield, Mrs. Justice Brown, Mrs. Sheridan, Mrs. Gorman, Mrs. Senator Dixon, Mrs. John Sherwood, Countess Esterhazy, Mrs. Menocal, Mrs. Swift of California, Mrs. Montgomery, Mrs. McKenna of California, Mrs. Justice Field, Mrs. Sherman, Mrs. Carlisle, Miss Gray, Mrs. Washburn, Mrs. McPherson, and Mrs. Bruen.

Mr. and Mrs. A. C. Barney gave a large reception tonight at their residence on Rhode Island Ave. The host and hostess received in the music room. The hostess wore a gown of white satin brocade and lace, with diamonds. Among the guests were Vice President and Mrs. Morton, secretary and Mrs. Blaine, Secretary Elkins, Justice and Mrs. Fields, Justice Blatchford, Senator Hale, Representative and Mrs. Bellamy Storer, Senator and Mrs. McPherson, Senator and Mrs. Manderson, Commander and Mrs. Train, General and Mrs. Nicholas Anderson, Senator and Mrs. and Miss McMillan, Mr. and Mrs. Marcellus Bailey, Dr. and Mrs. McKim, Dr. and Mrs. Lincoln, Miss Gale, Miss Biddle, Miss Pendleton, Dr. Bispham, Mrs. Sheridan, Mr. and Mrs. Audenreid, Mrs. and Miss Holick, Miss James, Mrs. and Miss Richardson, mr. and Mrs. Pollak, Miss Brewster of New York, Mr. and Mrs. Newlands, Miss McAllister, Mr. and Mrs. Nelson Brown, Miss Brown, Lieutenant and Mrs. T.M.B. Mason, Miss Phenix, Mr. and Mrs. Emmons, Mr. and Miss Linden Kent, Mr. and Mrs. Slater, Mr. and Mrs. and Miss Warder, Representative and Mrs. Hitt, Assistant Secretary and Mrs. Stoley, Minister Leghalt, Mr. von Mumm, Minister Paternostre, Mr. Botkin, Mr. Horace Washington, Captain Cowles, Mr. Stevens, Mr. Jesse Brown, General Fullerton, Dr. Murray, Captain Dewey, and Lieutenant Buckingham.

The Corean Minister and Mrs. Ye Cha Yun gave a tea from 4 to 7 o'clock this afternoon which was largely attended by society. The parlors of the location were decorated with growing plants and smilax. Mrs. Ye received her guests in a native gown of light blue brocade with a waist of yellow, trimmed in garnet velvet. Her English is now quite perfect, and there was not the slightest hesitation in starting or sustaining conversation with the many who approached her desirous of that pleasure. Minister Ye remained by his wife's side during the earlier portion of the afternoon, as the company increased he mingled with the guests, escorting friends now and then to the dining room where the receiving party, in pretty light gowns, dispensed with the refreshments. 

In the first parlor Mrs. Sevellon Brown assisted in receiving. In the adjoining room Miss Thompson poured tea, and in the dining room Miss Moore served coffee frappé. Miss Cuthbert served bouillon, and Miss Beatrice Farquhar presided at a large bowl of punch. The other young ladies were Miss Riggs and Miss Thompson of Philadelphia.

Stunning, Gilded Age private ballroom in 1890s Washington D.C.

Mrs. Dixon, wife of Representative Dixon of Montana, gave a tea from 4 to 7 o'clock this afternoon in the ballroom of the Shoreham, which was elaborately decorated with flags which lined the walls on all sides and waved from the chandeliers and balconies about the apartment. In the south balcony, behind an arrangement of palms and plants, an orchestra played, the young people present availing themselves of the good music and perfect floor to enjoy dancing. The effect of the decorations and the elegant gowns of the receiving party as one entered the apartment was very agreeable. The hostess stood at the doorway leading to the ballroom, receiving in a gown of silver-gray satin with silver brocade and passementerie, with vest of pink crêpe. A bouquet of La France roses was carried.

Mrs. Charles Gibson wore black thread lace over ivory-tinted satin; Mrs. Carrie, white satin-striped tulle; Mrs. Governor McCreary, white satin brocaded in pompadour colors; Mrs. Hemphill, black lace with scarlet flowers; Miss McCeney, white brocade flowered in colors; Miss Carrie Parker, grey tulle with pink ribbons. The other ladies of the receiving party were Miss Lieutenant Williams, Miss Lieutenant Hare, Miss Howell, the Misses Newberry, Miss Helm, Mrs. Senator Saunders, and Mrs. Sutherland.

At the rear of the ballroom a delightful collation of salads, ices, sandwiches, cakes, confections, and champagne punch was served from an immense round table, in the center of which was a plant of ferns. From a smaller table tea was served by the young ladies.

Miss Lenore Armstrong gave a pink luncheon today in honor of Miss Lansing of Watertown. The guests were Miss Hazeltine, Miss Davidson, Miss Warfield, Ms. Scott, Miss Church, Miss Deering, Miss Buriitt, Miss Rundlett, Miss Kerr, Miss Todd, Miss Hunter, and Miss August. –New York Times, February 3, 1892

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette – East Met West in DC, Part 2

More on the wife the Corean Chargé d'Affaires in Washington D.C Society of the late- 19th Century 

This building in Washington, D.C., was once used as the legation building for the Korean Empire. In 1892, the first State Dinner was held there, to celebrate the 19th birthday of Corean Crown Prince Ye.  It was reacquired in 2012, by the Korean government, after 102 years.

The 19th birthday of Crown Prince Ye, the only son of his Chosun majesty, the King of Corea, was celebrated last night by the first state dinner ever given at the Corean legation. The Chargés d'Affaires and Mrs. Ye arranged the details of the banquet, which will long be remembered by the guests present as a notable one in the cleverness with which the national colors were carried out in the decorations of the rooms and table. 

In the dining-room the mantle was banked with smilax, which also twined the mirror. The green was studded with American Beauty roses. On either side of the fireplace were tall growing plants, among the branches of which were artificial birds of the vivid blue and red peculiar to Corea. The central lamp suspended from the ceiling was covered with a wide-spreading red silk shade garlanded with smilax. Down the center of the table, over a white damask cloth, were three squares of white silk, the borders bright with native embroidery. On the middle one was a circular centerpiece of American Beauty roses and ferns arranged to represent the middle figure of the Corean flag, and on either side the silver candelabra work with scarlet shades.

A pretty idea of Mrs. Ye, who honored the occasion by wearing a gown of the national colors, was to have at each place for the ladies, instead of a bouquet, a single American Beauty rose. Tied about the stem in a rich bow was a broad white satin ribbon, on one end of which in red lettering was the name of the guest. On the opposite end was the striking blue and red device of the Corean flag, beneath which with the letters "C. P.-19-B. A., "signifying the Crown Prince's 19th birthday anniversary." The letters were in blue and the numerals in red.

In addition to the decorations already described at the legation were two large screens of nearly a dozen sections, each resplendent with native embroidery, the gift of the King to Mr. Ye. On the west wall of the dining-room hung the great white flag of Corea with blue and red decorations. Mrs. Ye, wife of the Corean secretary has not been well for some months past and will leave the city September 5th for a visit to her home in Corea, to which country she will be accompanied by Miss Davis of Abingdon, Virginia, who will go as a missionary. They will sail September 17th from San Francisco, to which city they will be accompanied by Mr. Ye, who will return to Washington in time to celebrate His Majesty's birthday at the legation. Mr. Ye's official duties will not permit him to accompany his wife to Corea. Last month they visited the Natural Bridge and Luray Cave. The Washington Post, 1892

19th C. photo of a Corean baby, carried by his sister ~ The first Corean born in the United States was named after the American capital, Washington D.C. : On October 12, 1890, wife of Charge d’Affaires of the Korean legation, Ye Cha-yun,  gave birth to a son they named "Washon," in honor of the nation's capitol. Washon sadly lived for only a few months though. He died shortly before Christmas. It was reported that Ye never saw the two month old son, due to a Corean custom that prevents a father from seeing a child until three months after its birth. The American press and D.C. social circles were already quite taken with Mrs. Ye, and were sympathetic to her tremendous loss. Less than a month after Washon's death, the NY Times read: “Since the death of their infant son, the poor little woman has suffered greatly from loneliness, as in the absence of the Minister's wife she has no companion at the legation." Mr. and Mrs. Ye used black-edged cards, an American mourning tradition, after the death of their baby. But as they were in Court mourning for the Queen Dowager of Corea, Mrs. Ye wore a strip of plain white ribbon across the front of her gown on the left side, white being the color of mourning in Corea.

                         

On 'Corea' vs 'Korea' ~ Three Corean dignitaries visit Washington D.C. in the late 1880s. "SEOUL — Is alphabetical order destiny? Yes, say Korean scholars and politicians who have begun a drive to change the official English-language name of their country to "Corea." The seemingly arcane campaign is based on an increasingly prevalent belief that the original "C" was switched to a "K" by the Japanese at the start of their 1910-45 occupation of the peninsula so that their lowly colonials would not precede them in the English alphabetical hierarchy. The controversy used to be fodder only for linguists and historians, but lately the debate has seeped out of academia and into the realm of the political. Twenty-two South Korean legislators last month introduced a resolution in their parliament calling for the government to adopt the Corea spelling -- the first time such a proposal has been made in official quarters in South Korea. North and South Korean scholars, who rarely agree on much, also held an unusual joint conference last month in Pyongyang, the North's capital, and resolved to work together for a spelling change. They hope it can be accomplished in time for the 2004 Olympics in Athens, when the estranged countries intend to field a joint team." 2003, Los Angeles Times News

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

19th C. Washington Societal Etiquette

Circa 1860 illustration of White House (south face) with its first greenhouse 

Washingtonian Social Etiquette

The wife of the chief-justice, and not the wife of the President, is the first lady in the land, and takes precedence of all others. She holds receptions and receives calls, but she alone is excluded from all duty of returning calls.

The life of a lady in society at Washington is exceedingly onerous, and more especially so if she be the wife of any official.

Next in rank comes the wife of the President.

Social Duties Of The President

It is made the duty of the President to give several state dinners and official receptions during each session of Congress. Besides these, there are the general receptions, at which time the White House is open to the public and every citizen of the United States has a recognized right to pay his respects to the President.

Presidential Receptions

On the days of the regular " levees" the doors of the White House are thrown open, and the world is indiscriminately invited to enter them.

No “court”-dress is required to make one presentable at this republican court, but every one dresses according to his or her own means, taste or fancy. The fashionable carriage- or walking-dress is seen side by side with the uncouth homespun and homemade of the backwoodsman and his wife.

Neither are there any forms and ceremonies to be complied with in gaining admittance to the presidential presence. You enter, an official announces you, and you proceed directly to the President and his lady and pay your respects. They exchange a few words with you, and then you pass on, to make room for the throng that is pressing behind you. You loiter about the rooms for a short time, chatting with acquaintances or watching the shifting panorama of faces, and then you go quietly out, and the levee is ended for you.

Private Call Upon The President

If any one wishes to make a private call upon the President, he will find it necessary to secure the company and influence of some official or special friend of the President. Otherwise, though he will be readily admitted to the White House, he will probably fail in obtaining a personal interview.

Mrs. John Jay, "the First First Lady" ~ John Jay was a New York politician who would become the first chief justice of the Supreme Court of the United States, a two-term governor of New York, and an influential diplomat abroad.  As the job of President is a temporary position, "the wife of the chief-justice, and not the wife of the President, is the first lady in the land, and takes precedence of all others."

Social Duties Of Cabinet Officers And Their Families

The ladies of the family of a Cabinet officer must hold receptions every Wednesday during the season from two or three o'clock to half-past five. On these occasions the houses must be open to all who choose to call. Refreshments and an extra number of servants are provided. The refreshments for these receptions may be plain, consisting of chocolate, tea, cakes, etc.

Every one who has called and left a card at a Wednesday reception is entitled to two acknowledgments of the call. The first must be a returning of the call by the ladies of the family, who at the same time leave the official card of the minister. The second acknowledgment of the call is an invitation to an evening reception.

The visiting-list of the family of a Cabinet minister cannot contain less than two or three thousand names.

Cabinet officers are also expected to entertain at dinners Senators, Representatives, justices of the Supreme Court, the diplomatic corps, and many other public officers, with the ladies of their families.

The season proper for receptions is from the first of January to the beginning of Lent. The season for dinners lasts until the adjournment of Congress.

The President is not expected to offer refreshments to the crowds who attend his receptions. The Vice-president and Speaker of the House are also freed from the expense of feeding the hungry public.

Social Duties Of Congressmen And Their Families

It is optional with Senators and Representatives, as with all officers except the President and members of the Cabinet, whether they shall “entertain.”

There is a vast expense in all this, but that is not all. The labor and fatigue which society imposes upon the ladies of the family of a Cabinet officer are fairly appalling. To stand for hours during receptions at her own house, to stand at a series of entertainments at the houses of others whose invitations courtesy requires should be accepted, and to return in person all the calls made upon her, are a few of the duties of the wife of a high official. It is doubtful if her husband, with the cares of state, leads so really laborious a life.

In Washington society one end of a card turned down denotes a call in person.

From “The Ladies' and Gentlemen's Etiquette, A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society” by E. B. Duffey ~ 1877

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia