“This is my first big holiday season and the list of parties is almost endless. I am terrified that I may commit sonic social error and not even know it....”
Dear Miss Deb...
For answers to your questions on dating, etiquette and beauty
Q. My dates and I have no trouble with conversation until that agonizing good night scene at the door. I could die as I shift from one foot to the other and stammer, “ . . guess I’ll he seeing you” for the millionth time. How can I develop a graceful exit technique?
A. By planning ahead just as you did in getting ready for the date. Locate your keys, express your feeling about the good time you had, make the small talk on the way to the door. Let him unlock and open the door for you. Don’t linger. Say your final “wonderful time-good night,” and allow your smile to float back briefly as you disappear behind the closing door. If you work it right, he may be disappointed, but not offended!
Q. This is my first big holiday season and the list of parties is almost endless. I am terrified that I may commit sonic social error and not even know it. Are there any definite party going rules I could learn for insurance?
A. There probably are as many rules as there are parties, but here arc three tips which provide a general rule of thumb. Always try to be helpful, cooperative about any special party plans, and a happy conversationalist. (If you're not good at small talk, be an enthusiastic listener!) Be as thoughtful about the family and their home as you would want people to be about your own. Express your thanks for a good time and leave promptly when the party is over. These guideposts should make you the most popular guest of the season.
Q. Older people make me self-conscious. I always feel they are critical of me because of all the talk about wild teenagers. Should I just avoid them whenever possible?
A. The sooner you learn to deal casually and respectfully with older adults the better. They will be coming into your life more and more as you go away to school or out into the job market. Begin by relaxing and being as natural as possible. Remember, adults like to be put at their ease, too. Just as you don't like to be considered a “wild teenager,” adults don't like to be thought of as “has-beens” or “critical old fuddy-duddies.” Try to listen for the likenesses between you instead of the differences.
Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia
