Gilded Age Advice for “Vocal Culture”

I deny that a woman is formed by nature so as to be compelled to shriek in falsetto in order to throw her voice to the distance of five, ten or twenty rods. Good etiquette requires for our comfort and highest accomplishment a clear, strong, full use of the voice. 

A Plea for Voice Culture

A good deal is being done to educate the hands. In my opinion it is becoming a vital matter to also educate the voice, not for special purposes, but for everyday use. Women rarely use their lungs and throats wisely. I know many who can hardly be heard distinctly across a table. This is often affectation; more often it is a habit formed from a belief that a woman should not be loud voiced. It is not necessary to screech in order to be heard, that is if your voice has been discreetly used. 

A child's voice is generally pleasant until made unpleasant by bad habits or a bad spirit. But an unused, neglected voice, when driven to effort, makes a bad mess of it. I deny that a woman is formed by nature so as to be compelled to shriek in falsetto in order to throw her voice to the distance of five, ten or twenty rods. Good etiquette requires for our comfort and highest accomplishment a clear, strong, full use of the voice. 

There never was invented by art so charming an instrument as a beautiful throat. Yet how many voices are wretchedly cracked and squeaking. I am ambitious as a mother that each one of my children shall have fine vocal organs; well developed, well trained and delightful to be heard. That is, we should not only be able to talk to people all the way to them, but so as to delight them when we are heard.- Mary E. Spencer in St. Louis Globe-Democrat, 1892

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Gilded Age Girls Warned of “the Cars”

Young ladies in the gilded age were warned from falling prey to vulgar or vicious characters one might be exposed to while on “the Cars” of public transport.~ It was reported in the papers that one such young lady eloped with a man who turned out to be professional gambler!  “The girl was not to blame. It was the natural effect of her daily journeys without protection. But the dewy bloom was fast going from the peach…Their acquaintance, it was stated, ‘began on the cars.’” 

Acquaintance “Begun on the Cars”

“I live,” said a gentleman lately, “in a town near New York, and go to my business there and return on the same line of railway. The train in the morning and afternoon is filled with girls from ten to eighteen years on their way to and from schools in the city. They usually belong to families of the educated, influential class and at home are carefully guarded from vulgar or vicious companions. They are not so guarded on the cars, and the result is soon apparent.

“For example, I remember, about five years ago, that a blushing little girl of 15 was put one morning on the train by her father; her books were in an embroidered bag, and her ticket ready in her portemonnaie. It was evidently the first time she had made the journey alone. She sat timidly in one corner, her color coming and going when the conductor spoke to her. She was a picture of innocence and modesty.

“After that, she came down every day on the same train. In a day or two, I noticed that she was listening to the chatter of the other school girls, at first with a mixture of disgust and amazement on her shy face. Presently, as she became used to it, the disgust wore off, and she listened smiling, to their absurd gossip and jokes.

“In a week or two the conductor and brakeman recognized her as a familiar figure, and tipped their hats to her as she stepped on board. A little later they exchanged good-morning and remarks about the weather. She apparently felt that civility required some answer. When, as weeks passed, the conductor, a young, vulgar fellow stopped beside her seat to ask what was her school, and to make remarks on her textbooks, the girl, though frightened and annoyed, did not know how to dismiss him.

“Before the summer was over, she had lost much of her shyness and helplessness. She came alone to the train, jumped on board, and marched into the car like the others with an air of perfect sangfroid. The girl was not to blame. It was the natural effect of her daily journeys without protection. But the dewy bloom was fast going from the peach.

In a year that girl entered the car as if it belonged to her, laughing and joking loudly with the other girls and the train hands. She had lost all interest for me, and I ceased to notice her. One day, however, about a year afterward, the morning papers contained the account of the elopement of the daughter of Judge Blank with a man who turned out to be a professional gambler. “Their acquaintance, it was stated, ‘began on the cars.’

“It was the shy little girl. She might yet be shy and innocent and happy, if her mother had not subjected her to the risks of that unprotected journey. No education can atone for the price paid for it in such exposure.”-Youth's Companion, 1886

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia