A View of Etiquette from 1900

The rules lay down are all calculated to produce one result —harmony— and are as incumbent upon one as the other. No member can shirk responsibility, and no one can transgress without exposing himself to censure. 

Who Makes Social Laws?

The laws governing society are the product of men, and differ very little in any matter of consequence, no matter where we go. Their value is understood. At the root of all lies self-denial, forgetting of self, and kindly desire to do good to all. Good society‘s laws are inexorable; only the refined and apparently moral can enter the charmed circle. The rules lay down are all calculated to produce one result —harmony— and are as incumbent upon one as the other. No member can shirk responsibility, and no one can transgress without exposing himself to censure.


The first duty of society is to unite the many elements of which it is composed, so that an easy exchange of ideas and kindly intercourse may be had. We are but parts of one great whole. Without the restraining and educative force of society’s laws, we should relapse into barbarism. No one‘s rights would be respected, and might and brute force would govern the social fabric. All this changed by the dictates of Etiquette. In good society, no word is uttered disparagingly of another; charity for the foibles of its members is enjoined; there is a gentle deference shown toward women, grounded in a chivalric respect. Would all this be possible did not men and women acknowledge the importance of those duties that society thrust upon them? — From Twentieth Century Etiquette, 1900

 Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia