Formal Invitation Etiquette

Street numbers may be spelled out unless they are too long or they may be put in figures. House numbers are usually put in figures unless they consist of only one figure when they may spelled out if preferred. 

GENERAL RULES FOR FORMAL INVITATIONS

1. Telephone numbers should not be used on formal invitations.

2. The family crest or coat of arms may be embossed without color at the top of the invitation if the invitation is issued jointly by husband and wife, or by the husband alone. If issued by a widow, only the coat of arms should be used, omitting the crest and motto, and in the form of a lozenge.

3. “request the pleasure of your company” is used in dance invitations, dinner invitations, etc., and not “the honour of your presence.” (Note that in formal invitations the English style of spelling honour and favour is always used.)

4. If an invitation to a formal luncheon or dinner is hand-written, the same form is used as that of an engraved formal invitation.

5. The most personal, formal engraved invitation of any kind is the form in which the guest's name is filled in by hand. This confers a special compliment on the recipient.

6. Teas are generally given by women only. However, they are sometimes given by “Mr. and Mrs.” jointly.

7. One envelope is used for invitations to teas, dances, etc. The tissue may be discarded in mailing invitations engraved upon cards, unless two cards are mailed in one envelope, when a tissue should be placed between them.

8. Invitations may be engraved on plain or paneled sheets or cards.

9. It should not be necessary to have to ask for a reply, but in these changing and rather careless times it has become quite essential in many cases. The most commonly used forms are “Please address reply to (address),” “Please send response to (address),” “R. S. V. P. commonly written ‘R.s.v.p.’ meaning “Répondez s'il vous plaît (Reply if you please)” and “The favour of an answer is requested.”

10. “At home” or “At Home” are usually used on tea invitations in place of "will be at home."

11. Street numbers may be spelled out unless they are too long or they may be put in figures. House numbers are usually put in figures unless they consist of only one figure when they may spelled out if preferred.

12. Dance or tea invitations should be mailed three weeks in advance of the occasion, if possible.

13. “A small dance” is a term frequently used in dance invitations, regardless of the size of the affair. The word “ball” is used only on invitations to a public occasion of this kind. — From, “New American Etiquette,” 1941

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia