An Etiquette “Social Security Checklist”

For building social self-confidence and winning over others, always put a natural smile on your face and check yourself in the mirror before you put yourself in unfamiliar social or business situations. Look with a critical eye. Is there anything that stands out to you as possibly questionable?

Non-Verbal Skills and Body Language: 

• Is your posture non-threatening and open? Or are your arms crossed over your chest in a manner that may suggest you are bored? Or aloof? Disinterested? Angry? Or are your arms relaxed and casually at your sides?
• Is your smile natural? Does your smile look genuine? Or does your smile look forced? Does your smile look fake?

Verbal Skills: 

• Is your conversation light and friendly? Is it assured? Is it professional and business-like?
• Do you avoid confrontational statements or judgmental conversation? Do you avoid statements that begin with, “You should...”,  “You shouldn't...”, or “If I were you I would...” when your opinion hasn't been solicited or requested? These sentence openers can be misconstrued and give the impression that you know what is best for the other person/s involved. 
• Do you avoid racial slurs? Stereotypical statements about cultural or religious groups? Conversations including such content are off-limits in social and professional settings. 
• Also off-limits are foul language, off-color jokes, jokes of a sexual nature, personal finances, political opinions and any other matters of a “personal” nature.

Appropriate Attire: 

• Will you blend in with everyone else? Or do your clothes scream out, “Look at me!” Professional attire works the best when it invites compliments on your good taste, not gossip or questions about your common sense or mental state. 
• Do you ask for scrutiny or questions by wearing fraternal pins, insignias, religious medals, political buttons, tattoos, body-piercings in non-cultural or socially accepted bodily areas that are displayed for others? These things are best left at home or concealed under your garments when dealing in a professional (and many social) situations unless you are in a profession relating to such matters and no one would question, or find surprising, your choice in wearing or displaying them. — By Maura J. Graber, 1994

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia