Formal Dinner Seating Arrangements

This diagram shows what was, in the Gilded Age, a reportedly popular French-style, dinner party seating arrangement. This savvy seating arrangement places the host and hostess in seats across from one another, midway to the center of the table on each side. The couple, seated in such close proximity to one another, can direct or control the conversation with their guests, and help the dinner party flow along more easily throughout the evening.

These diagrams above show a popular dinner party seating arrangement for rectangular tables, at which the host sits at one end and the next male “of importance” is seated at the opposite end. At these tables, the hostess sits on that guest’s left, while the woman next in importance sits on his right. Note that “importance” is a relative term. It can refer to rank, seniority, age or even to which guest traveled the furthest distance or who will next be celebrating a birthday.

“When the party numbers 6, 10, 14 and so forth, the more modern way of dispensing with end places entirely, and seating the host and hostess directly in the center of each side, is increasingly used. To make this come out right, the number along each side, as you can see, must be an uneven one such as three, five, seven. This places the host and hostess opposite in the midst of their party, allows them to direct and control the conversation as necessary and look after the general welfare of their guests. At the usual friendly dinner party, there is seldom a special “guest of honor.” If, however, you were giving the dinner party in honor of a particular woman guest, you would seat her at the right of the host. If a man were the one to be so distinguished, you would see him at the right of the hostess.”— From Helen Sprackling, 1960

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia