Etiquette and the Gilded Age Toilette

It is every woman's to make herself as beautiful as possible; and no less the duty of every man to make himself pleasing in appearance. The duty of looking well is one we owe not only to ourselves, but to others as well. 

DUTY has more to do with attention to the toilette than vanity. We are therefore bound to turn our personal attractions to the very best advantage, and to preserve every agreeable quality with which we may have been endowed.

It is every woman's duty to make herself as beautiful as possible; and no less the duty of every man to make himself pleasing in appearance. The duty of looking well is one we owe not only to ourselves, but to others as well. We owe it to ourselves because others estimate us very naturally and very properly by our outward appearance; and we owe it to others because we have no right to put our friends to the blush by our untidiness.

If a gentleman ask a lady to accompany him to the opera or a concert, she has no right to turn that expected pleasure into a pain and mortification by presenting herself with tumbled hair, ill-chosen dress, badly-fitting gloves and an atmosphere of cheap and offensive perfumes. 

So, also, if the gentleman comes to fulfill his appointment with tumbled clothes, shaggy hair and beard, soiled linen and an odor of stale tobacco, she may well consider such an appearance an insult. – Manners, Culture and Dress of the Best American Society, By Richard A. Wells, 1891

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia