Brazilian Beach Etiquette

Acting with civility, that is, with consideration for others, is beyond a choice, a habit. So the sooner you start practicing, the faster you'll be used to acting with civility and etiquette on the beach – and off the beach too. 

Summer Manners Guide

A beach is synonymous with leisure, rest and fun, right? Okay, but to make sure we all have a good time, it's always good to remember some recommendations about beach etiquette. After all, it's no use for someone to have fun if it brings discomfort, annoyance or harm to the other. As the phrase goes: “Your right ends where the other's begins”.

I know, we often do something not so nice out of distraction or haste. For example: Your son is coming back from the seashore and you, who stayed at the parasol, want to tell him not to run near people, because he is almost throwing sand at someone. So you yell, “Muriloooo, don't run close to the others!” and with that, your scream ends up waking the girl who is napping in the parasol beside you, or resulting in a reprimanding look from a man who is reading nearby.

True, even the most careful of people get distracted at times. It is not possible to be considerate of all others one hundred percent of the time. However, it is possible, and very desirable, that we try. And that we try to remember as much as possible that we are sharing the same space with other people.

Acting with civility, that is, with consideration for others, is beyond a choice. It should be a habit. So the sooner you start practicing, the faster you'll be used to acting with civility and etiquette on the beach – and off the beach too. 

You may be asking yourself: “And what do I get out of it?” You are gaining peace by not causing or getting involved in conflicts, you are setting a good example for your children and anyone who sees you, you are sowing warmth and kindness, and as you have heard, “kindness breeds kindness,” therefore, the more you are kind, the more others will be, and the more kindness you will receive.

Often the kindness you will receive will not be from the same person you helped. But even if it comes from someone else, it comes. You also gain peace of mind, a clear conscience, a feeling of well-being. It is scientifically proven that doing, receiving and even witnessing an act of kindness is good, with a discharge of oxytocin, also known as the “love hormone” in everyone involved.

That is, when we are kind, civilized, and use self-control and etiquette on the beach, it becomes a place of tranquility and harmony, fulfilling its role of providing leisure for everyone.

The beach is a place of more informality, both in costume and communication (gestures, verbal and non-verbal expressions). Therefore, some rules can be more flexible, such as how to eat, for example. However, we must not confuse flexibility and informality with mess and lack of manners.

Even though it is an open place, where we have a tendency and even greater permission to act more freely, common sense and consideration must prevail. It also happens sometimes that the beach is full and people have to stay closer to each other. In these cases, our care must be redoubled.

Now that we understand the importance of beach etiquette and how each of our attitudes impact the well-being of others, let's look at some practical tips on how to act with good beach manners.

Beach Etiquette Tips:

Occupation of Available Space

If the beach is emptier and has more space for you to occupy, use it freely. However, when space is more restricted, avoid placing your things on a pile of chairs, and scattering towels and sarongs over a large stretch of sand. If you're late and the beach is already full, you'll have to settle for not taking the best spot. It's not nice to settle down practically glued to someone's chair or umbrella. Even if you are on a crowded beach, try to distance yourself from others as much as possible.

If you've got a chair from a good spot on the beach and don't plan on using it now, but only a few hours from now, avoid leaving your towel by reserving the chair for when you get back.

Children on the Beach

It is important to ensure that your children do not disturb others. Children are not born knowing how to behave in each place. They need someone to teach what is polite and proper and what is not. And that someone is you; father, mother or guardian. Observe children closely, guiding their behavior when necessary. Children tend to run and play without worrying so much if they are spilling sand or water on someone. They can step on other people's towels, yell around other people, etc. Also take care so that they are always safe, avoid letting them to go too far, to enter the sea unaccompanied, or to play games that represent danger to them or to others.

I suggest that you only go to another child's parents if you notice that their actions are posing a risk to the child's or other people's safety. In the case of minor annoyances, it is sometimes preferable to let it go and say nothing, to avoid further annoyance or conflict.

If an accident happens between you (or your child) and someone else, offer to help resolve or work around the problem. Try to replace the damaged object or food yourself, or offer money for the person to replace whatever is damaged with another. Don't forget to apologize. If it's something your child caused, ask him to apologize too. That way you will be teaching him to take responsibility for his actions.

Games on the Beach

There are typical games and sports when we go to the beach, for example:

• Playing games like soccer or volleyball, try to play on a more spacious part of the beach, away from other people. 
• Be careful not to hit the ball or bump into anyone nearby. Preferably stop the game to wait for someone to pass safely.
• When playing in the sand (building castles, bucket of water, shovels), be careful not to spill sand or water on people nearby.

Dogs and Pets on the Beach

The same precautions that we advise to have with children, apply to pets. Be aware of your pet so that it doesn't bother other people. Before taking him, check if that beach accepts animals, how he usually behaves in the presence of strangers, if he has up-to-date vaccinations, if you are confident in leaving him off a leash. Don't forget to clean up any dirt or poop it makes. Remember to bring toys, snacks and water so that he can also enjoy the tour. Furthermore, any hungry and bored person or animal is more likely to start bothering others.

Music on the Beach

There are those who go to the beach to have fun and enjoy listening to music. Perhaps they are at the beach for travel, in the company of a group of friends or family. There are also people who enjoy silence, who seek the beach to relax, read, or just think about nothing. When these two people or groups meet, the chance for one to leave unhappy is big. But it's possible to avoid annoyances using these beach etiquette guidelines.

As much as people who decide to go to beaches can already imagine that they will be full, especially on summer days, this is no reason or excuse to leave education aside. Ideally, just listen to music in public places with the headset. If you are in a group and everyone wants to enjoy the sound together, try to keep the music at a low volume, ask beforehand or observe if those nearby are showing signs of discomfort. As much as you love your music, other people may have different preferences or simply not feel like listening to music at all. The same care applies to the volume of voice and conversations.

Clothes on the Beach

As we mentioned at the beginning, the beach is naturally a more informal place, where people tend to go mainly when it's hot, which means less clothes and shorter and smaller outfits. Valuing the well-being of everyone, try to be careful with what you are wearing.

There are beaches where nudism is allowed, but there are family beaches where people can feel invaded by your lack of clothing. If visiting a nude beach, check the guidelines first. It may be allowed, for example, not to wear clothes on the beach, but in other places such as bathrooms, it is mandatory to wear them. 

Also avoid facing people. Sometimes we automatically notice someone, but since it is a nude beach, this attitude should be avoided so as not to cause misinterpretations or embarrassment.

The way we dress conveys a message to others, so it's important to be careful about showing respect through our clothes as well.

Photos and Videos

When out in public, and especially at the beach, we should avoid taking videos or photos of other people and posting them to social media, without their knowledge. Think twice, three, or even four times before recording a scene, no matter how funny or different it seems to you. Let's use empathy more. Would you like to be photographed in that situation? 

Don't justify yourself thinking that you would never do something like that, or that that person will never see or know about the video or photo. Images spread quickly on social media. And you can go through a similar or embarrassing situation anywhere and be photographed. Let’s be more gentle and cautious.

The good old golden rule, which we learned in childhood, remains valuable: “Do unto others as you would have done to you.”

Dating on the Beach

We know that the beach combines with lightness, vacations, adventures and love. Loving is good, but it is important to avoid excessive displays of affection, especially when there are more people on the beach. The couple may be in love and not mind the prying eyes of those close to them. But those who are close are not obliged to see explicit demonstrations of other people's passion. Like loud music or no clothes, it's an invasive situation, an overexposure that can embarrass everyone.

Makeup, Beauty and Sunscreen

When it comes to makeup and the beach, less is more. Just as we need to adapt our clothes to each situation or event, makeup must also match the environment we are in. It's possible to look pretty on the beach, invest in some accessories and even light makeup. However, it is unnecessary to overdo the makeup. As for the sunscreen, you can overdo it at will.

Food and Drinks on the Beach

Regardless of whether you brought some food from home or bought it at the beach, try not to make too much of a mess. Clean or collect what you have used, and remember to collect the garbage.

In relation to alcoholic drinks, it is important to know yourself and control yourself, in order not to exceed the limits. In addition to running the risk of annoying others with unpleasant jokes or comments, you can also put yourself at risk if you combine drinks with swimming in the sea, for example. Alcohol also makes it easier to get involved in unnecessary conflicts. If you're taking care of children, there's one more reason not to go overboard, as the beach offers a lot of risks for the little ones.

Trash on the Beach

If each one takes care of the garbage they produced on the beach, it will always be kept clean. When leaving, don't leave trash behind. If there are dumpsters nearby, use them. Otherwise, take your trash with you until you find one, or even to your house or hotel. 

A simple and easy idea to put into practice is to get into the habit of always carrying an empty bag to the beach, which will serve as a trash bin. This makes it easier to put it in a real dumpster later, or take it away with you. I know, nobody likes to be carrying garbage. But neither the others – nor nature – is responsible for the garbage you produced and left on the beach.

I really like the phrase that says: civility is the end of the blame game. That is, it doesn't matter if other people are doing the right thing or not. We make a choice to opt for civility and do the right thing regardless of what others are doing. This is called self-responsibility.

When leaving, in addition to collecting your garbage and personal belongings, be careful when shaking the towels or removing the sand from other objects.

It may sound like a lot, but it's not. All it takes is a little empathy, consideration and goodwill. With children, the sooner you start teaching and practicing these beach etiquette guidelines, the sooner they will assimilate these behaviors and display them naturally. — By Gabriela Vassimon

Our newest contributor, Gabriela Vassimon has been working as an etiquette consultant for nearly a decade. As Civility Expert’s Brazilian exclusive affiliate, Gabriela majored in Psychology, and has over 10 years of experience working with children, teenagers and adults in different sectors (clinic, school, orphanage, companies). Gabriela wears several hats as a psychologist, etiquette consultant and entrepreneur. She is a certified Children’s Character, Confidence and Courtesy Coach as well as Master Civility Trainer, member of ICTC (International Civility Trainer’s Consortium) and World Citizen Alliance, holds an MBA in people management, Gabriela is a continuous learner and eternal observer of human behavior. Recognizing that her passion is helping others to find the best versions of themselves, and aiming to build a kinder and more considerate world, Gabriela has launched Escola de Gentileza – civilidade e etiqueta (School of Kindness – civility and etiquette). The school offers training and classes in grooming, decorum, social graces, etiquette, and civility for all ages.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia