Victorian Handshaking Etiquette

A gentleman cannot take a lady's hand unless she offers it, and an American authority on etiquette reminds him that be must not “pinch or retain it.” A young lady must not offer hers first, or shake that given her, unless she is the gentleman’s friend.

Hand shaking is British. The lounger in society, in his glass of fashion, enumerates its various styles as indicative of character. These are aggressive, supercilious, sympathetic, emotional, but none of these are required by etiquette. Still, to shake, or, rather, to take or give a hand in mere conventional greeting, is a cultivated art of society. 

A gentleman cannot take a lady's hand unless she offers it, and an American authority on etiquette reminds him that be must not “pinch or retain it.” A young lady must not offer hers first, or shake that given her, unless she is the gentleman’s friend. A lady should always rise to give her hand, and in her own house she should always offer it in greeting, to strangers and friends alike. — Los Angeles Herald, 1883

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