Society Etiquette of Gilded Age Calls

In accordance with her own ideas of etiquette, borrowed partly from the London set and partly from her native hospitable Southern training, Mrs. Alva S. Vanderbilt sent out 1,000 letters to friends telling them of her daughter's engagement, and as half of that number were within calling distance of the City by the Sea, 500 persons lost no time in calling. The exact wording of the announcement cannot be stated accurately, because it differed with the person and degree of friendship. 

Rush to See the Prospective Duchess

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Town A Silken Arcadie

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Mrs. Alva Vanderbilt Sent Out 1,000 Announcements and Had 500 Calls

Within 10 days after the announcement of the Marlborough engagement their drove up the roadway within the beautiful outer portals of marble House 300 fine equippages. And out of each their tripped from one to three elegantly dressed women. An American girl had stepped into the British nobility, and these calls were for congratulation, many wishes of joy and much felicity. In accordance with her own ideas of etiquette, borrowed partly from the London set and partly from her native hospitable Southern training, Mrs. Alva S. Vanderbilt sent out 1,000 letters to friends telling them of her daughter's engagement, and as half of that number were within calling distance of the City by the Sea, 500 persons lost no time in calling. The exact wording of the announcement cannot be stated accurately, because it differed with the person and degree of friendship. 

To 20 went the barest announcement of the fact; to another 200 a more elaborate wording, and to the others all over the world, went long private letters, which were the work of the indefatigable Mrs. Alva and her secretary. To do this sort of thing well, so that it gives satisfaction to all sets of friends, is a social art greater than leading a cotillion or planning a ball. It is very astonishing how short a time it takes to get new gowns. Late in the season though it may be, early in the winter though it may seem, busy though all of the modistes advertise themselves to be, yet new dresses appear as suddenly and as beautifully planned as though months of preparation had been put upon them.


All society wore new calling gowns to pay respects to the prospective Duchess. She, quiet slip of a girl, wore white with bunches of ribbon at her waist for the Newport calls; and for the New York ones, when she came down to the city for the trousseau planning, she wore a light material, crepon mostly, or the sheerest China silk. She wore them in black, in brown, in blue and in bright red, often figured. When she goes into the street, she wears a long double-breasted coat that hides the gown to below the knees. Very English, but not very dressy, her friends say!


But the calling gowns of those who put on their best smiles and their best gowns to go to see the little Duchess to be! One of them was a heavy corded silk. The skirt fairly rustled with stiffness. It was plain and beautiful. The cut was Princess in the back, showing no seam at the waist. The fastening must have been under the arm and at the shoulder, for it was Princess in front also. A very heavy white cord and a jet braiding went across both the front and the back of the waist, making a fine full figure, as any trimming along the bust or mid-waistline will, and there was a lovely thick crystal-edged ruching around the neck. Strange what an air of elegance is given to a dress by the addition of white corded silk sleeves! 

There is a New York woman who prides herself upon dressing with elegance upon a small allowance, who has four or five sets of these sleeves, differently trimmed, that can be quickly sewed into a gown by her maid. The sleeves of this one very stunning calling gown were of white silk, with small bits of applique work upon them. The applique was in black velvet. The bits were triangles of black velvet, with beads sewed upon them. They were appliqued upon the white silk with coarse sewing twist, and around them were sewed black jet beads and small jet ornaments. The effect was very rich.


Stamped brocades in white silk are effective, but the cheapness with which they are produced makes them a little common for those who are desirous of making an individual impression. The applique bits of black velvet are not quite similar in appearance to the common brocades. Ladies who go shopping may like to walk, but those who go calling invariably likely to go in a carriage, even though it be but the two wheeler of the cab stand. The reason for this is the extreme elegance of the visiting toilet. Even the dinner gown is simple alongside of it. Nothing in the whole wardrobe is as fine as one's best calling gown. — San Jose Mercury, October 1895

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