Agony Aunt Chastises Young Men

“O, men why are you so thoughtless? Don't you know how much scrimping and saving it requires for us to be able to purchase a silken gown? One in which you are proud to have your sweetheart, sister or wife appear? And remember that in order to win a girl’s heart you must show appreciation and admiration when she spends all her money and three hours of her time to be admired by you.”

I am in receipt of a letter from one Dame Durden, spinster, who is anxious to be allowed some little space in the Sunday issue of this paper, in which to express her sentiments as regards the treatment of her “pets.” Be it known that Dame Durden is the “Friend of Woman.” Some of her “girls” have been confiding their woes to her of late and have prevailed upon her to publicly express her views. It is with great pleasure that I allow Dame Durden space in my particular column.– The Society Editor

NOTE– Men, don't tell the young ladies who told you, but Dame Durden is, to my certain knowledge, as fond of and as ready to uphold you as she is the said young ladies, and should they, during this their year, in any way mistreat you, I will just as willingly donate my column in your behalf as theirs. – The Society Editor

SAN BERNARDINO, Feb. 5. I am passé. The saddest moment of my life was the one in which this fact came home to me. But this does not prevent my having some of the dearest friends one could wish for, and among the most cherished are some of this season’s “buds.” The young ladies all come to Dame Durden for consolation and advice. And no one takes more pleasure in their pleasures than I. 

About 11 o'clock last Saturday morning I went over to G’s house to learn all about the ball given the evening before. I found my dear little friend in tears. On asking the cause of all this sorrow, she led the way, silently, to her own room, and there on the bed lay her newest evening gown– ruined. She held up the once dainty waist, and could some of the beaux of that ball have heard the tirade (uttered be tween sobs) against them, they would, I am sure, have pitied poor little G.

“O, how I hate them! (Sobs) Every last one, although I'm not sure just which one did do it!" (More sobs) And she showed me the once gauze-covered sleeve with the gauze hanging in strings, and amid more and more of those sobs told me how she had gone there after three hours’ primping and how all the neighbors who came in to see her ready for the “fray,” as it afterward proved, told her she looked “like a dream.” “But you should have seen me when I got home!” And she went on to tell how one man in particular took hold of her as tho’ for protection more than anything else, and tugged away at her dainty sleeve until– well, you could only realize it all by a look at that sleeve.

And the back of that beloved gown was next displayed– I know there must have been an hundred handprints there. O, men why are you so thoughtless? Don't you know how much scrimping and saving it requires for us to be able to purchase a silken gown? One in which you are proud to have your sweetheart, sister or wife appear? And remember that in order to win a girl’s heart you must show appreciation and admiration when she spends all her money and three hours of her time to be admired by you.– “Dame Durden,” The Weekly Sun, 1896

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