Dining with the Fork

Typical 17th C. Georgian era, British silver dining knife and fork

“No rule is so general, which admits not some exceptions.”—Robert Burton 

About the fork centers a good deal of controversy, and on this subject the well-bred English person always disagrees with the well-bred American who is as yet uninfluenced by British notions. The Englishman insists that the fork, when used with the meat course, should never be taken from the left hand, and that it should be held always tines down; while the average well-bred American sees no harm in shifting it to when he is using it to convey food from his plate to his mouth, and in turning it tines uppermost when he finds that most convenient. When he does this, the Britisher says he is using his fork like a shovel, and this to him is unpardonable. 

The fact seems to be that the British mode is spreading and that in many, if not most, boarding schools, where good manners are insisted on as much as French or English and rather more than arithmetic and geography, the British way with, the fork is insisted upon. 

But remember that there is authority for both methods, and that many well-bred, persons are none the less well-bred because they cling to the American method. But however you use fork, see that you don’t clutch it too greedily, and likewise see that you do not cram the fork with food with the aid of the knife. It is extremely awkward and bad manners to use the fork as a masher 

In eating potatoes and other vegetables, one should simply detach a bit of the potato by means of the tines of the fork, and carry this to the month without crushing it between the tines. Never put more on the fork than you can take in one mouthful. Some persons you know take a large morsel on the fork at once, and then take it in two mouthfuls at once. This is a small matter, but it is one of those little things that constitute bad table manners. 

Never use the fork in order to reach for anything that is not on your own plate. If food is served to you on serving dishes, there should be service spoons or forks, and you should help yourself by means of these just as you would in your own home. 

If the bread plate is out of reach the very ill-mannered person sometimes reaches it by means of his fork. Some persons forget that when the fork is not actually in use conveying food to the mouth that it must be laid across the plate. It should not simply he laid with the prongs resting on the plate, much less should it be held in mid-air. 

Some persons, when they wish butter on potatoes or other vegetables, take it from their butter plates by means of the fork. If there is no butter knife, then the regular knife should be used. On no account should the fork be used for this purpose. - Mary Marshall Duffee, 1922

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