Savvy Hostess’ Entertaining Tips

If yours is a “sit down” dinner, have room temperature water (with no ice in the glasses) at the table. Condensation from glasses won’t be leaving wet rings on your table linens or dripping onto silk dresses and ties. Also, cold ice water numbs the palate and the food is not as tasty as it could be.

1. Schedule your party by the size of your guest list and amount of your budget. Full meals will be expected if you invite guests during the lunch hour (11:00-1:30) or at dinner time (4:00-7:00). Light buffets of crudités and hors d’oeuvres can be served during the off hours.

2. Be specific with what attire you expect: “Festive attire encouraged” or “holiday dress welcomed!” Leave room for the imagination and every budget. “Business attire” is too ambiguous. Doctors, plumbers bankers have three different standards. Unless you want a potpourri of clothing styles, spell it out. Your guests won’t be surprised and neither will you.

3. Hire a sitter if you have the room and encourage house bound moms and dads to bring along the kids. Have pizza delivered for them and room available to watch videos or color and draw. Even small gifts for the children will keep them entertained for hours and out of the adults’ hair.

4. If yours is a “sit down” dinner, have room temperature water (with no ice in the glasses) at the table. Condensation from glasses won’t be leaving wet rings on your table linens or dripping onto silk dresses and ties. Also, cold ice water numbs the palate and the food is not as tasty as it could be.

5. Have non-alcoholic beverages on hand as well as soft drinks for non-drinkers. Having wines with your meal, even with several good choices available to your guests, is less expensive than stocking a bar. Again, you don't have the condensation or dripping glass problem to deal with.

6. Keep your menu simple, and practical. Offer plenty of pastas or salads and interesting crackers along with cheeses and breads. The health conscious guests will feel pampered. Beef lovers will still be satisfied if you provide meats in moderation. Shellfish and fowl are also popular and can fit into most budgets.

7. Designate an alternate host or hostess in case of the always unexpected yet unexpected calamity. Enlist the aid of a good friend or relative to take over in the event you are faced with backed-up plumbing or a small kitchen fire. Familiarize your your alternate with where the main supplies are and who is on your guest list.

8. Have a plan “B” to execute in dire emergencies. Every smart hostess has taken her cue from Dr. Suess’ famous cat that carried a whole alphabet in his hat. Be prepared for the unpredictable. Weather is tops on my list, a sick child is second. Limit the stressors and you maximize your unflappable control of the situation.— Maura J. Graber, 1994

 
Contributor, and Site Editor, Maura J. Graber has been teaching etiquette to children, teens and adults, and training new etiquette instructors, since 1990, as founder and director of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette. A writer, Graber has been featured in countless newspapers, magazines and television shows, and was an on-air contributor and correspondent for PBS in Southern California for 15 years. She is working on her 4th book on etiquette and antiques throughout history and is a historical etiquette consultant for Julian Fellowes’ newest period drama, The Gilded Age. Her popular books on antique flatware and etiquette history are available on Amazon

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia