Visiting Etiquette in Japan

Ignorance of Oriental etiquette sometimes leads to awkward situations in fashionable quarters. Lately the English lady received a morning call from a Japanese gentleman, who, instead of making his first visit very brief, as she expected, stayed to luncheon. After lunch he still stayed on, while the lady grew extremely weary of her visitor, and every minute expected him to leave. Dinner came; the Japanese man was still a fixture, and the host took his turn at entertainment till he was so tired that he retired to the smoking-room and left his wife in charge. At last, just at midnight, the Japanese man departed, with most abject and elaborate apologies for quitting his hostess. Next day he confided to a friend that he had never passed through such an ordeal. According to Japanese etiquette, the lady receiving the gentleman should give the signal for his departure, so he thought she would never let him go, and finally he had to leave without her permission. – Hanford Journal, 1897

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