A Collegiate Agony Aunt

At this instant an acquaintance of yours rushes up and begins to tell you her unbelievably low mark, which she just acquired in her examination, She talks volubly, and your friend fidgets from one foot to the other. 

Sally's Social Slants

The purpose of this column (every column has to have a purpose) is for the help of those who would really like to know a little bit more about etiquette. Of course this may be an old story to the disciples of Emily Post, but many a problem arises on the campus which leaves you at a loss.

For instance, you are standing on the lawn between classes, talking to a friend. At this instant an acquaintance of yours rushes up and begins to tell you her unbelievably low mark, which she just acquired in her examination, She talks volubly, and your friend fidgets from one foot to the other. Before you can introduce them (you surmise they have never met) your acquaintance turns her attention to “that screamingly funny thing she just heard in the Co-op.” Your friend, baffled by the names of “Bill,” “Jane” and “Mary,” whom he doesn't know, and who, from her description, sound rather flighty, mutters something to you about “a class” and hurries away.

What To Do?

You are left with the acquaintance who gabbles cheerily on, not realizing that you heard only half of what she was saying. What to do? Should you have broken into her conversation and introduced them, should you have said quietly “We are discussing the football game” thus winning her undying hatred, or should you have raised your voice and drowned her out, introduced them and then quickly sprinted away.

The thing to do! Let us rehearse the scene. You were talking to your friend, you saw your acquaintance coming (unless she sneaked up on you anyhow the result would be the same), with her approaching footsteps your face should leave that of your friend, and fold into a welcoming smile. Meet her rising tide of small talk with a quick “Well, hello (add her name to show you know it) oh, that's too bad about your low grade. Do you know my friend, Ben Gassing? Ben, this is Lotta Smalltalk.” 

Why Not Explain?

Now your duty is done, Let Lotta rave on, or Ben fidget. They know each other. But is your duty done? In a strictly etiquettal (is there euch a word) sense it is. But it seems rather unkind to listen to Lotta's chatter about Mary, Jane, or Bill, when Ben knows nothing about them. If Lotta insists on telling this screamingly funny incident (and why not?) you should say to Ben “Do you know Mary, Jane or Bill?” If he does, so much the better; if he doesn't, and the story involves more than just their names you should explain briefly as “Bill is a football player,” or “Mary runs the feature column.” This puts everyone at his ease, which is the basic purpose of etiquette after all. – From The Oak Leaf, 1940

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia