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| She was known for her tyrannical views of etiquette… |
| Anne d’Arpajon, the Comtesse de Noailles (Anne Claude Louise d'Arpajon), was a French noblewoman and Versailles court official. She served as the Dame d’Honneur for two French Queens, the young, Marie Antoinette and her predecessor, Marie Leszczyńska. Dubbed “Madame Etiquette” due to her insistence that not even the smallest minutia of Versailles court etiquette ever be ignored nor altered, she was a continual irritant to Marie Antoinette.— Public domain image of “The Lady with the Mask” aka “Madame Etiquette,” by Louis Surugue, 1746 |
It is impossible to read even the least dogmatic books on etiquette without being oppressed with the conviction that a heavy and binding addition has been made to the code of morals in the by-laws which have to do with visiting cards, invitations, conventional phrases and other minor but vigorous formulas. It has been reiterated by writers on these subjects that not a single rule of etiquette is arbitrary, but that all prove their reason in the very nature of things, and that those who disregard them simply show their own lack of insight and incapacity to appreciate genuine refinement.
While this is all very well for society people pure and simple or those who have other definite and absorbing work in life compliance with all the thousand and one trifling points of etiquette is an utter impossibility. The question then becomes, “Shall such persons be excluded from society or be allowed to enter it on their own terms?” Society might be so conducted as to make of it a charming and delightful recreation instead of a tyrannical business, and those who see this clearly can do much toward making it so.– Philadelphia Press, 1854
🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia
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