Court Etiquette and Royal Perogative

King Edward VII and Queen Alexandra had other strange court etiquette, too. Every man and woman who has been invited down to Norfolk on a visit to their Majesties, gets weighed by either the King or Prince of Wales before leaving.

Edward was Rebuffed

It appears that one of the barbaric prerogatives of Royalty, which survives even in England, is the right of a member of the “Royal blood” to ask an introduction of any woman his fancy strikes. This custom is designated as “court etiquette.” The lady must feel highly honored, and the husband not offended, according to the law-givers of the court. 

This abominable practice was not allowed to lapse by the present King when he was the gay Prince of Wales, and an incident where he was rebuffed by an American woman has been recalled through the appointment of her son as one of the Secretaries to the special embassy named by President Roosevelt to attend the coronation.

Twenty years ago the Prince was at watering place, and espying the American woman, he sent an aide to ask her to lunch with him. She informed the aide that she had no desire to meet the Prince, and upon his approaching her with the evident determination of forcing an acquaintance, she turned her back and walked away.

It is now intimated that the son may find things uncomfortable in England when he goes on his mission. We think not. If the King has the horse sense of his average subject, he admired the woman all the more and appreciated her American spirit of independence and strict adherence to the laws of propriety. 

That a nation as enlightened as Britain should tolerate such a custom, ever under the guise of court etiquette, is one of the many inexplicable things in the world. To the true American woman the Prince of Wales is no more than any other man, and his presumption in seeking an introduction would be resented by the average American woman of to-day in the same commendable spirit as was displayed in the instance noted. — Stockton Record, 1902

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Our Best in Show Winner for 2023 – Amateur Category

For our Third Annual Etiquipedia International Place Setting Competition, Stephen Hanson is again our Best in Show Winner for the Amateur Community category. He won in this category in 2022.    

His theme choice options for the 2023 contest were: A period 1953 place setting in honor of the Coronation of Queen Elizabeth II; A 1930's nursery tea party place setting for young Princesses Elizabeth and Margaret; A mid-century modern, post-World War II tea place setting (for one or two); A complete place setting (for 2 or more) from any period in the life of King Charles III. 

Stephen’s choice was the period 1953 place setting in honor of the Coronation of Queen Elizabeth II. It was a lovely alfresco garden luncheon setting. Congratulations, Stephen!

The following is our interview with Stephen:

1. How did you choose the menu and various elements you used in your setting, and why? Please explain each of the utensils at your setting… For which of the foods on your menu (or course) was each different item intended?

Luncheon Commemorating the Coronation

of

Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

on 2 June 1953

Prawn cocktail

Cream of celery soup

Duck confit, served with roast potatoes, cress salad, asparagus with mayonnaise

Selection of cheeses (Stilton, aged Cheddar)

Trifle

Tea & coffee

Cocktail:

Gin & tonic

(Gordon’s London Dry Gin)

Wines:

Champagne Moët & Chandon Impérial Brut

González Byass Tío Pepe Fino Sherry

Château Beauregard Pomerol 1999

Taylor’s 20-year-old Tawny Port

The above menu, I hope, reflects dishes and wines that were available and popular in Britain and elsewhere across the then Empire and Commonwealth in the 1953. One also has to bear in mind that wartime rationing had only ended recently. And not every household had electrical refrigeration, hence the duck confit. Trifle was and remains a popular dessert. Asparagus would have still been in season somewhere in the northern hemisphere in early June.

Being early summer, this meal has been set out on the terrace amid the flowers. (It rained in London, though, on the day of the Coronation.) The champagne is for a toast to the monarch. The Imperial label is appropriate to our late sovereign, who was queen of much of the world when she ascended the throne.Sherry and an aged claret (or burgundy) were regarded as the proper wines to serve with any fine meal. Port was and is de rigueur for cheeses and after a meal.

One hardly needs to explain the role that gin and tonic played in the Empire.

The crockery is prewar. The plates are the Royal Doulton Marina pattern, which came out in 1934. It was created, I believe, to commemorate the marriage of the glamorous Princess Marina of Greece to Prince George, Duke of Kent, who was an uncle of our late Queen. 

The cut-glass champagne flutes and wine glasses date from the 1950s. The water goblets, I believe, are Victorian, while the sherry glasses are the Waterford Crystal Lismore pattern, which came out in 1957. The Stuart crystal bowls for the prawn (shrimp) cocktail bear a number indicating the design was registered in 1926.

The cutlery is mostly sterling silver in the Old English pattern. The Art Deco cruet set and the matching sugar caster are hallmarked for Sheffield 1932 and 1933. The butter dish has an additional hallmark for the 1935 Silver Jubilee of King George V and Queen Mary, the grandparents of our late Queen.  

The menu card is on the dining wagon, which is serving as the sideboard. Experience has taught me that someone invariably knocks over the flowers or a wine glass trying to peruse a menu card set on the table. The silver biscuit box (for the cheese course) is hallmarked for Glasgow 1930. The black and white photo of our Queen was taken in 1952 at the start of her reign by Dorothy Wilding.

2. Why did you choose this particular period in time to set your table? Please go into as much detail as you can.

I am a great fan of Art Deco, which lingered into the late    1940s and early 1950s. The Art Deco era brought together craftsmanship and mass production. Mass production won out from the 1950s.

                 

    Note my attire. No self-respecting gent in the early 1950s would have received visitors or ventured outside the house without a jacket and tie (or a hat for that matter). I was also wearing Coronation cufflinks, which I acquired over thirty years ago at a Salvation Army charity bazaar in Tokyo. 

3. Have you always enjoyed a properly set table? Or, if not, was the table setting something you learned to enjoy through your social life and/or business later on in life?

Proper food deserves a properly set table, beautiful        surroundings, and good company. This is something I.   have cherished from a young age. 

4. Did you do any research on table setting etiquette before setting your elements at the table?

 Not really. This is something that grew organically from my upbringing, love of antiques, and reading of history.

5. Do you plan on entering again next year?

Yes.

6. Do you have any special memory they had of watching the Coronation or the Queen’s funeral (if any)?

The funeral of our late Queen was very moving. It’s hard to     believe that Queen Elizabeth II is no longer with us. I greatly     respected and admired the Queen for her selfless devotion to     duty, her deep religious faith, her stoicism, humour, and     impeccable style, and her ability to preserve her privacy and     dignity in this goldfish bowl age.     

Here is a coronation souvenir that belonged to my paternal grandmother.

Again, Stephen, Elizabeth Soos and I say, “Bravo! And congratulations!” 👑
 – Maura Graber

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

A bit of Finger Bowl Etiquette Humor

Load! Aim! Fire! 

The Deadly War on the Finger Bowl!!

Gen. T. Bone Riley Hurries to Defend Baby Bathtubs at Eat Counters

Led by T. Bone Riley and Sheriff Hammel, gastronomical Los Angeles is threatening revolution and secession from California.

Mr. Riley, who is known to "pork and beaners" throughout world and the said to be the innocent model for Van Loan fiction, claims the state is interfering with life and liberty and the pursuit of cleanliness.

Sheriff Hammel has doubled the guards at the county jail and declares his prisoners shall never be subjected to unnecessary torture.

THIS IS THE REASON

A demand has been made before the state board of health by State Sanitary Inspector Edward T. Ross that a regulation be adopted specifying that no finger bowl shall be used more than once.

Finger bowls of the ordinary type gather germs, the inspector says, and the only way to preserve the health of the human race is either to stop eating outside of your own kitchen or compel cafés to supply never-to-be-used-again finger bowls.

Finger bowls — for the benefit of those who do not know — are small tubs in which one may bathe publicly without fear of arrest. They are usually accompanied by an attendant who mops up the water if you tip the bowl and who is disappointed if you fail to tip.

Reports from Sacramento, where the protest has been made before the state board of health, fail to state the dread disease germ for which the finger bowl is the favorite vehicle, but the general belief among Los Angeles hotel and café proprietors is that appetite and hunger are closely associated diseases often to be found lurking in the vicinity of the fateful bowl.

'WIPE 'EM ON THE TABLE'

"This ain't the flowing bowl that's prohibited in the Bible," said T. Bone Riley today in an imaginary interview. "Nothing of the kind. They tell me the finger bowl is made of glass or copper, and that a waiter brings it to you after you eat and you dip your fingers in it and then wipe them on the table cloth. Sounds to me real sanitary and I think it ought to be encouraged. Even at home you have to wash before you eat. And it isn't asking too much for you to do the same thing when you get through — especially when you're out in company. The state board will have a hard time taking the finger bowls off of my pie counter."

Sheriff Hammel, whose boarders at the county jail are the most varied and steady in the city, is bitter in his stand against the antifinger bowl campaign. He said: 'OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS!'

"Never use a finger bowl but once? Why, it's an outrage! That's what it is an outrage! If that law goes into effect it will cost the taxpayers of this county a lot of money. All the finger bowls in the county jail are stationary. They use the same ones all the time. If you took them out every time they are used the plumber's bills would bankrupt Rockefeller. Never-to-be-used-again finger bowls? Slush! Why, the next thing they'll be saying we must have never-to-be-used-again bathtubs."

Al Levy, who knows more about bowls than any other man in the southwest, says if the law passes every person will have to carry his or her own finger bowl.

"Women will wear them for bangles," said Mr. Levy today, "and men will have them fitted on the heads of their canes. In a short time, instead of buying your wife a wrist watch, you'll get her a wrist finger bowl. Or you'll see the bald-headed chap pull off his skull cap and the waiter pour it half full of water while the finger-rinsing process goes on."

Nat Goodwin, founder and for some time principal patron of the famous Nat Goodwin café, telegraphed the following comment from San Francisco, where he is reiterating "Never Say Die" in solo with Marjorie Moreland as an accompanist:

"I never cared for finger bowls. They are too small for a regular drink and hold too much for a chaser."

The only word of encouragement to the state board comes from Vernon Goodwin, manager of the Hotel Alexandria.

"It really makes no difference, anyway," he said. "Finger bowls are de trop. However, we have always served a separate finger bowl to each consumer and our waiters are instructed to use every effort to discourage large parties using the same finger or families’ bowl, even when dining in private rooms. Finger bowls are for single dips and should never be used either for plunge or shower." — Los Angeles Herald, 1914

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Diplomacy Dealing with Drunkeness

“‘We mustn't offend him,’ said the proprietor. ‘I'll tell you what to do.’ Then he whispered to the head waiter, and went away. The head waiter called a waiter and in turn whispered to him. Then he went away…” — Restaurant wait staff, circa 1900 

“I know now why one Tenderloin restaurant keeper is successful,” remarked a Wall street broker the other day. “I was in the main dining room at 6 o'clock one evening with a party of men. We noticed a little commotion near the entrance, and saw that it was caused by the arrival of a well-dressed, good-natured looking man, whose bearing showed that he had been out with the boys. He wasn't noisy or offensive, but he couldn't have walked a chalk line if his life had depended on it.

“He came down the room in an uncertain way, shelled off his overcoat, put it with his hat on a chair, sat down, folded his arms on the table, and went to sleep. The waiters looked at him and ran after the head waiter. The latter walked up to the sleeping man, as though he intended to awaken him. Then he stopped and called a waiter.

“‘Go for the proprietor,’ he said. The proprietor came. ‘That's so-and-so,’ said the head waiter. ‘He's a good customer, but he's very drunk, and he's gone fast asleep. What shall I do? Shall I wake him up?’

“‘We mustn't offend him,’ said the proprietor. ‘I'll tell you what to do.’ Then he whispered to the head waiter, and went away. The head waiter called a waiter and in turn whispered to him. Then he went away.

“The waiter went to the china pantry and came back with a finger bowl. This he put on the table where the sleeping man was. In doing so he rubbed the fingers of the sleeper. The man straightened up and opened his eyes. The boy was not looking at him, but had picked up the water bottle and was filling the finger bowl. In doing so he knocked the bowl with the bottle so that it rang like a bell. 

“The drunken man looked at it with brightening eyes. The boy paid no attention to him, but shook out a napkin which he laid beside the finger bowl. By this time the drunken man was fully awake. The boy took up his overcoat and stood respectfully at one side as if waiting for the man to rise.

“The drunken man put his hands in the finger bowl, dried his fingers on the napkin and rosе. The boy was behind him in a moment, and in another the overcoat was on the man’s back, his hat was in his hand, and he was headed for the door. He put his hand into his pocket, slipped a coin to the boy, and walked out.

“Now, that restaurant keeper is a great man. He's a diplomat. No trouble, no noise, no row, everyone satisfied and happy. That fellow ought to be an ambassador. He'd make a success of anything.” — New York Sun, 1901

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Emily Post on Seeds and More

Remove all the seeds that you can with the fruit knife and fork, before lifting a piece to the mouth, and any seeds left in the fruit are removed between thumb and finger, or dropped into the cupped hand. They are in either case dried as completely as possible with tongue and between lips. 

My dear Mrs. Post: 

(1) How does one remove watermelon seeds from the mouth at table? 

(2) A friend told me that tablespoons are not the real serving spoons. I have always used them as such, which must be wrong. 

(3) is it ever all right to eat peas with a spoon, in ease, or must they be juggled with a fork? 

(4) Are little side dishes always taboo? 

(5) In a restaurant, when foods are sometimes served in separate dishes, is it correct to eat them directly from the serving dish or should all food be put from there over on the dinner plate?

Answer: 

(1) Remove all that you can with the fruit knife and fork, before lifting a piece to the mouth, and any seeds left in the fruit are removed between thumb and finger, or dropped into the cupped hand. They are in either case dried as completely as possible with tongue and between lips. 

(2) There are slightly larger spoons used for serving, but tablespoons answer perfectly. 

(3) Spoon absolutely taboo. Mash them slightly with the fork, if you must. But I can't see that there is any difficulty ever. 

(4) Correctly, yes. 

(5) You should put them on your plate, but there is no rule because conventionally side dishes are not used. - by Emily Post.-WNU Service, 1934

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

American Naval Finger-Bowl Usage

Nothing dainty like a crystal finger-bowl with a matching under-plate would do for the Navy. No, Sir! In 1947, they needed fluted and pierced finger bowls (with gadroon-mounted borders) in silver-plate of heavy quality. A whopping 38,000 of them!

Fred Othman Says: Evidence Concludes Fact That Admirals Must Be Sloppy Eaters

Washington, May 19 (UP)– Careful study of the evidence forces me to conclude that admirals are sloppy eaters. At breakfast they smear strawberry jam between their fingers. They butter their knuckles at lunch. At dinner they dip their digits in the gravy. This explains the Navy's desperate need for 38,000 fluted and pierced finger bowls (with gadroon-mounted borders) in silver-plate of heavy quality.

The gold-braided gentlemen with the sticky fingers never have learned to dampen same gently. The way they splash in their finger-bowls you'd think they were taking a bath. This is hard on the table linen. So the Navy also has asked for bids on 30,000 gadroon-mounted silver-plated finger-bowl trays to match. 

Rear Admiral W. A. Buck, chief of the Bureau of Operations and Accounts and the old sea-dog in charge of finger-bowls, never did get around to the 8,000 discrepancy between trays and bowls. My guess (only a guess) is that some naval officers splash less than others and don't need trays under their bowls.

Rep. Noble J. Johnson of Ind., brought up the subject of the sailors’ gooey fingers. He was disturbed over reports of the Navy buying finger-bowls from the silverware manufacturers while it was peddling other silver finger-bowls as surplus property. The bluff old admiral, veteran of many a meal at sea, said this was not true, except in part. It takes a good, solid finger-bowl to stand up under attack by an admiral or even an ensign. During the war, the Navy had to accept some ersatz finger-bowls of cheap and flimsy silver-plate, like wedding presents.

It has turned 663 of these battered bowls over to the War Assets Administration, along with 5,376 trays, mostly dented and none with piercing, fluting for gadroon-mounted borders. Admiral Buck wasn't sure what his new finger-laving equipment would cost. Inflation seems to have hit the finger-bowl business. He figured that before the war 38,000 custom-built, finger-bowls would have nicked the Navy for $26,700. The bill for 30,000 trays to match would have been $27,000.

Congressman Johnson, who hails from Terre Haute, where oysters and admirals seldom are seen, was interested also in the Navy's stores of oyster forks. The admiral said he was fresh out of oyster forks, but had put in an order for more. We taxpayers can only hope they arrive by September, which has an "R" in it.

"And how about the 23,000 surplus salt and pepper shakers?" demanded Rep. Johnson. "With the cut glass linings?” “Pressed glass,” snorted the admiral. “Not cut glass.” “And further more,”he said, “the Navy is hanging on to nearly all of them.”

“It has offered only 627 surplus salt and pepper shakers for sale, along with 3,750 gravy ladles, 209 unlined silver-plated mustard pots, 57,775 dessert forks and other cutlery too numerous to mention here.”

“The unlined mustard pots cost $7 each; the gravy ladles $1.03. And I think the admiral, the congressmen and I have answered all pertinent questions as to naval eating habits, except one: What is a gadroon-mounted border on a silver finger-bowl?” 

“It is a rim with bumps on it. Intended to discourage splashing.” –  By Frederick C. Othman United Press Staff Correspondent, 1947

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Fork History and Steel Blades on Knives

“…there are many varieties of food which deteriorate from even the slightest contact with steel, a metal still much in use for knives…” – In 1889, unless one had all silver flatware or gilded flatware, the blades of most knives were still made of steel. The steel would clash with the flavors of sauces or dressings which had citric acid in them –like orange or lemon juice– and those containing vinegar. Thus leaving fish and many salads inedible to most guests.

Although the four-pronged silver fork was in use upon the continent of Europe in the first decade of the present century, it is noticeable that the use of the knife in carrying food to the mouth is by no means obsolete among some of the most advanced of the European nations. One can easily draw a mental picture in which the dogmatists of etiquette a half century ago are seated about a tempting board, all eating with their knives, but using them daintily; and the retrospect need not go back of the times of those whose manners at table, as well as elsewhere, are defined as models of elegance.

Since then the steel fork has been banished, the knife subjugated and the spoon subdued. The reason for all this is commonly supposed to be the danger of cutting the lips with the knife, but such danger is very slight, unless one be persistently stupid in handling it. It is much more sensible to assume that mankind was not slow to perceive the more agreeable sensation of putting to the lips the delicate tines of a fork, which were close enough to convey all except liquid edibles with comfort and convenience. 

Then, too, there are many varieties of food which deteriorate from even the slightest contact with steel, a metal still much in use for knives. There is, however, an inclination to force the use of the fork to the point of affectation, and excess in this direction is quite as deplorable as the indiscriminate use of the knife. The proper use of any table implement at a table where one is a guest is no different from what it would be at the most informal meal, except as it may be influenced by the special preparation of an edible. – By Eliza M. Lavin, 1889

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

A Critique of Early Football Fans

The Philadelphia Athletics of the 1902 National Football League—Public domain image

 

 

Rooting Manners

“The rooting,” declares a sporting authority, critically reviewing a recent game of football, “was noticeably ragged and poorly led.”

What would be thought, in days of old when knights were bold, of the chivalry of a fighting man who took his retainers with him to the tourney, and had them posted about with fish-horns and megaphones, for the express purpose of disconcerting his opponent? Odsbods! not much.

Spontaneous bad manners have something to condone them, especially in a generation whose besetting sin is pose. A lot can be forgiven youthful ebullience, too. But deliberate, studied boorishness — does it pay?— From ‘Puck,’ in the Los Angeles Herald, 1930

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Advice to Women During WWII

Carpe diem or ‘seize the day!” Ruth Millett was lamenting that it was too late to see Paris as it had been occupied by Hitler for 4 years. When this article was written in April of 1944, Paris was only 5 or 6 weeks away from being liberated by the Allied forces from German occupying forces.
On June 14, 1940, German troops entered Paris. French forces had withdrawn from the city the day before and it was declared an “open city.” Even though this was done in order to prevent its destruction, it seemed to many that Paris would never be the same.

We, The Women

It’s too late now to see Paris. Those of us who had planned to visit there “someday” put it off too long. It is easy to put things off until they are no longer possible. It's so easy that we do it over and over again.

An attractive girl, thinking she can marry any time, turns down one man after another. And one day she realizes that her dates rapidly are getting fewer and that the men she goes out with aren’t as attractive as the men who used to take her around.

A family plans to buy a movie camera and take pictures of the whole tribe together. But they wait so long the circle is broken, and the opportunity is lost forever. A man slaves for years so that he can take things easy and afford to play when he is older, but the habit of work becomes so fixed that when he has the money he can't enjoy taking it easy.

A woman tells herself that she will have time for outside interests when her children are grown, but by the time they have left home she has grown so little with the years she can't find anything outside her home that interests her. A busy person keeps thinking that he will have time for friendship later on, only to find that when he is ready to devote some time to his friends they have moved on to new friends they have no time for him.

Today, because of the uncertainty of the future, it is more important than ever that we find the time and the way to do the things that are important to us. We had better find time for home life, for fun, and for really getting acquainted with those we love right now. – By Ruth Millett, 1940

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Enjoying Faux-Champagne Taste

“If you must drink with repeal, here’s how!” – A lovely friend, Lorrie, found this news clipping in with her late-mother’s belongings. The Repeal of Prohibition in the United States was official on December 5, 1933. If during those long, supposedly dry years of Prohibition you had forgotten the proper etiquette for serving a variety of alcoholic beverages, or had never learned how in the first place due to your youth, this handy guide was available to help. – Image source, @dish_diva on Instagram

 “Wise” New York of 1926

Professedly worldly-wise residents of New York have been paying from $15 to $80 a quart for a mixture of bicarbonate of soda and cheap wine, according to an exposure which is carried on the first page of the New York World. In the belief that champagne is the only drink which has defied the bootlegging chemists, habitues of the night clubs have spent huge sums to make wealthy a crew that works in the cellars of Mulberry street turning out a very cheap imitation, “From the moment the short, eagle-beaked wine master, imported from Bordeaux to a cellar In the Bronx, dips his finger into his mixture pf bicarbonate of soda and Mulberry street wine, tastes it, and finds it good or good enough – until it passes down the throat of the salve night club patron,” says the World, “but a few days have intervened.”

The stuff must be sold quick or the cork would not pop and the bubbles would have disappeared. The sophisticates pay $30 a bottle for pop and bubble done up with a French label and dated 1911. “At least four cellar plants,” continues the World in its exposure, “protected by heavy steel doors and the apparent indifference of the authorities, are producing champagne.” There may well be more. The four alone have a capacity production of 550,000 gallons a year, or half again as much as was imported from France before prohibition. – The Tribune, 1926

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Prohibition Glassware Etiquette

This beer glass flair seems to represent the only outstanding novelty in the Christmas trade. The fancier stores have devoted their purchasing attention to this department to the exclusion of all others which probably provides a commentary on current modes, manners and thought.
“The Prohibition Era began in 1920 when the 18th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, which banned the manufacture, transportation and sale of intoxicating liquors, went into effect with the passage of the Volstead Act. Despite the new legislation, Prohibition was difficult to enforce. The increase of the illegal production and sale of liquor (known as “bootlegging”), the proliferation of speakeasies (illegal drinking spots) and the accompanying rise in gang violence and organized crime led to waning support for Prohibition by the end of the 1920s. In early 1933, Congress adopted a resolution proposing a 21st Amendment to the Constitution that would repeal the 18th. The 21st Amendment was ratified on December 5, 1933, ending Prohibition.” -History.com

The Trend In Gifts, Manners and Modes of 1932

IN THE PRE-PROHIBITION days, the old saw about the man with the beer salary and the champagne appetite, had a point that appears to have been lost in the dry years. Certainly, the lowly juice of the malt that was once content to rest in a growler or a thick-bottomed glass mug wouldn't be able to understand what this old world has come to, were it to return to earth by grace of Congress, I took a turn around the stores last week and discovered that most of them had well equipped bars featuring glasses for beer and that the majority of the novelty sales were taking place in these nooks. And what beer glasses! 

Ornate tumblers in many colors and styles, representative of the highest art of the glass blowers, objects of art that made the once swagger steins look tawdry and cheap by contrast. And the prices being asked! Some of us old-timers gathered around one synthetic bar and reminisced on the situation and it was the consensus that time was when a barrel of beer could have been purchased for the price of two of the 1932 serving glasses, Curiously enough, this beer glass flair seems to represent the only outstanding novelty in the Christmas trade. The fancier stores have devoted their purchasing attention to this department to the exclusion of all others which probably provides a commentary on current modes, manners and thought. 

It was something of a contrast to leave these emporiums and go ont to the auction rooms where the Hill Smith treasures were being sold to the elite of San Francisco and the pick of the dealers. Those who had the good fortune to be Smith guests up Rio Vista way before the crash, remember well the fine dining room equipment. The Smith collection of glassware and coffee cups was noted throughout the district. Few were able to set a table more complete in detail. Yet the collection brought virtually nothing on the auction block. 

I saw handsome gold spun coffee cups, masterpieces of the art of china decoration, that cost as much as $40 apiece, go for $2. Oriental rugs that retailed at $6500. having difficulty reaching a $300. mark and imported furnishings selling for a song. I think the chief lesson to be learned from the auction rooms is not that there is a dearth of money in the community but that we have learned to become hard bargainers and our Yankee thrift is finally finding its way to the surface.– Oakland Tribune, December, 1932

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Coffee Etiquette to End Your Jitters

My “Après Lunch Coffee” (or in this case, Cappuccino), was not covered by Miss Manners in this particular column, but it certainly was delicious!

How tea came to be perceived as the official drink of the etiquette business, Miss Manners is not sure. Personally, she would have chosen champagne, preferably with a bit of fresh peach juice in it and a view of the Grand Canal,

But a less exciting addition is in order. Coffee is making great headway on the social scene, what with all those nice copper machines puffing away, and it seems time to review and revise the rules connected with serving coffee under a variety of with all those nice copper machines puffing away, and it seems time to review and revise the rules connected with serving coffee under a variety of conditions.

Here, then, is a coffee schedule for the day -a day less likely to end than to careen straight into the next day.

• Breakfast: This is the only meal at which coffee cups and saucers are properly set on the table from the beginning. Miss Manners hopes to get this rule past those who love coffee during all their meals by stating it early, before they are fully awake.
• At informal breakfasts, mugs may replace cups and saucers, provided no one puts a wet spoon flat on the table, a prohibition that does much to explain why cups have saucers in the first place. The spoon may never be left sticking up inside, even for a second. Don't ask Miss Manners where to put it instead; she always uses a cup and saucer.
• Late morning coffee: This is properly served with bread, sweet or otherwise, and gossip, sweet or otherwise. Mugs are used, as, contrary to popular belief, paper does not hold coffee.
• If the gathering is in someone's house, the person who lives there naturally makes and serves the coffee. If it is in an office, people either take turns or fend for themselves, now that putting a particular employee in charge of fetching coffee for others has become so fraught with unfortunate symbolism.
• Lunch: The rule against serving hot coffee during lunch is admittedly sometimes in conflict with the rule about pleasing one's guests. One way for the individual coffee drinker to get around this is to claim having skipped breakfast, so that starting with coffee represents breakfast.
• Iced coffee is a proper luncheon drink, but the tumbler or stump-stemmed glass in which it is properly served presents the same spoon problem as the coffee mug. Hot coffee may be served at the table with dessert only for an informal lunch; at a formal lunch, coffee service follows the meal, preferably out the dining room door, as at dinner.
• Coffee break: See Morning Coffee, above.
• Teatime: You may well ask what coffee is doing at tea, but it is a customary second offering, although a cold drink may be offered instead in hot weather, and hot chocolate in cold weather.
• That coffee is not the star of a tea party is shown by the fact that the person who pours tea at a tea party (a high honor designated to a distinguished friend) is considered to outrank the person who pours coffee.
• Dinner: The only coffee properly taken at the dinner table is in those households that once were considered conservative but now are thought of as wildly permissive, where the smokers (formerly known as gentlemen) are left at the table to take cigars and port, sometimes accompanied by coffee, while the non-smokers (formerly known as ladies) withdraw for serious conversation. Otherwise, coffee is served away from the table, in demitasses with wee little spoons that keep falling off the itty-bitty saucers. – by Judith Martin, aka “Miss Manners,” in the Press Democrat News, 1993

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Challenging American Drinking Habits

Champagne coupe glasses with champagne bubble poppers. Gilded age women were warned not to drink more than a little champagne as it may lead to unattractive, and certainly unfeminine, belching and gas. By the 1920’s, these were worn by flappers on long chains, for the same purpose while sipping champagne or fizzy cocktails.

GENEVA (By Mail)-Our subject is an earnest French wine grower from Saumur who has been calling on the American trade in New York and Boston and who is naive enough to hope that he will live to see a day when the American people, including Mr. Roosevelt's common man, will drink and appreciate wine and shun the cocktail which pickles the palate, as he says, and even avoid the cigaret for several hours before indulgence in wine.

Our subject says the cigaret has a tendency to fry or braise the tongue. Therefore, on mornings when he is engaged to judge the quality of wine by tasting the same he refrains from smoking until his work is done. His name is Baron Raymond de Luze, and he owns 18 acres of vines, the entire output of which he has just sold to American dealers. His is a sparkling wine, something like champagne. Your correspondent encountered him aboard the Ile de France en route to Europe.

18 ACRES PAY FOR LONG EXCURSIONS

It is an odd experience to come upon a farmer with an 18-acre patch whose crop is such that he can afford to go all the way to the United States on a fast, expensive boat, put himself in at hotels, ride the trains and buy a few wine dinners for his prospects merely to sell the produce of his 18 acres.

If the baron were in cotton or wheat or parsley in the United States, with only 18 acres under his plow, he would hardly find it worth while to go farther than the county seat to market his crop, and that in his own flivver. And if he were to buy a meal for a prospective customer it probably would amount to no more than a hamburger and a cup of coffee at the lunch wagon.

VINTAGE TRAILED HOME BY SENSE OF SMELL

Of course, the baron is one who can shut his eyes, roll a glass of wine under his nose, breathe deeply and tell you which side of whose hill it came from and how long ago. But for all I know there may be wheat farmers and parsley men who can do almost as much in their own respective lines. Although the good Baron de Luze is a farmer in a certain sense of the word, raising a product which comes from the soil, he is a dress-suit farmer and world traveler of aristocratic bearing and never to be considered in comparison with the mud-stained, hay-shaker of the United States who thought he was somebody when he put a bathtub in his home and sent his son to the State college of agriculture.

AMERICANS PROUD OF ABILITY TO GUESS

People do not ask who grew the wheat which goes into their bread or the cotton in their undershirts or in what year. There is a great difference there. For in wine the year is important, and even Americans feel a thrill of pride in their sophistication when they have learned at considerable cost in money and heartburn to guess when a wine was grown without squinting at the label on the bottle. For all the insistence of the Frenchmen that wine is a simple food and not a rite, all the literature on the subject tends to baffle and intimidate those very Americans to whom the customer appeal has been addressed since repeal.

MANY WINES LISTED ACCORDING TO REGIONS

The baron has given me a little book which lists hundreds of wines according to the region even the very acres which produced them, and their years, with a further important distinction as to whether they were bottled on their own home grounds or elsewhere in an assembling plant. The book says a certain wine is “still hard but getting better.” Another is “dryer than its neighbors.” It speaks of “body” and “finesse.” One authority says it is a crime to drink certain wine iced and an indecency to drink other wine in the noble, company of Montrachet. In the circumstances the American runs a grave risk of committing a serious offense.

Can this be salesmanship? Can any wine be so sublime that it were a crime to drink other wine in its presence? And if so, is it not, perhaps, as bad an error to wear silk socks grown in Japan, crop of 1931, in the same ensemble with a cotton undershirt, crop of 1926, from the fields of Zeke Which, of Corinth, Miss. Granted this, Mr. Which might take luxurious trips to Europe to sell the bales of his eighteen acres.

TASTE FOR FIGHTING LIQUOR CHALLENGED

But probably the baron is doomed to disappointment, for he is challenging a national taste for simple, fighting liquors, complicated with whipped cream, house-paint, cherries and pineapple slabs which existed long before prohibition and became a strong national habit during the long rebellion. He presents a product which reeks of mystery and fancy manners and preaches temperance to a people who drink only to get tight. So if it is true that Americans do not understand wine, then it is equally certain that anyone who recommends temperance does not know the character of the race.

A DAY'S WORK STARTS WITH SPLASH OF CHAMPAGNE

As a connoisseur the baron prescribes a small splash of champagne before dinner, a few delicate passes at a glass of white wine with the fish and a few sturdy licks at a red red wine with the meat, followed by champagne with the desert and brandy with the coffee. We know nothing about the traditional American meal of six whisky sours followed by a T-bone steak with fried potatoes, washed down with rye and ginger ale.

I should give something for the movie rights, with sound, to the scene of consternation on an Illinois Central diner should the baron put himself down to order a correct dinner from a wine list consisting of canned martinis and manhattans, sherry, port, whisky and gin. – The Oakland Tribune, 1935

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Our Best in Show Winner for 2023 – Professional Category

For our Third Annual Etiquipedia International Place Setting Competition, Amy Willcock is again our Best in Show Winner for the Professional and Etiquette Community category. She won in this category in 2022.    

Her theme choice options for the 2023 contest were: A period 1953 place setting in honor of the Coronation of Queen Elizabeth II; A 1930's nursery tea party place setting for young Princesses Elizabeth and Margaret; A mid-century modern, post-World War II tea place setting (for one or two); A complete place setting (for 2 or more) from any period in the life of King Charles III. She chose the 1930’s nursery tea party place setting for young Princesses Elizabeth and Margaret. We found her setting to be charming. Congratulations, Amy!   

Our Interview with Amy:

1. How did you choose the menu and various elements you used in your setting, and why? Please explain each of the utensils at your setting… For which of the foods on your menu (or course) was each different item intended?

My setting is for a children’s tea party – the children just happen to be princesses! It is set with 1930’s Bunnykins Royal Dalton china, the tea cups are slightly smaller than a regular sized tea cup being made for children, there is tea spoon in the saucer and the plate is an 8 inch/20 cm size. There is a bone handled tea knife ready for bread and butter with honey and cake and a spoon for jelly and ice cream. The jam pennies, a favourite of the young princesses, are eaten with the fingers. 

The tablecloth is an original 1930’s Disney table cloth made in Ireland. The honey pot is in the shape of a “skep” and wooden drizzler are sitting on a Peter Rabbit Wedgwood plate. There is a small silver teapot with a china tea strainer and a whimsical butter dish decorated with spaniels and a china milk jug by Gien decorated with circus performers. The small china hen is just for decoration.

We at Etiquipedia simply loved the vintage period details that make up this adorable table. The Bunnykins dishes with the “bone”, or celluloid handled knife and period flatware are the perfect accoutrements.

2. Why did you choose this particular period in time to set your table? Please go into as much detail as you can.

I chose this particular period as not much has changed since the 1930’s in aristocratic and upper class nursery’s, in fact all the same dishes are still great favourites today. All the china was used by my own children who are now grown up and I thought it was a great opportunity to use it. I still use the larger plates for birthday cakes as I love the running rabbits around the edge. 

3. Have you always enjoyed a properly set table? Or, if not, was the table setting something you learned to enjoy through your social life and/or business later on in life?

I grew up until the age of 12 in the United States, but my mother who was British insisted on setting a properly laid table and holding a knife and fork “properly” meaning in the English style, not cutting the food up and laying the knife on the edge of the plate and changing the fork into the right hand as they do in the USA…. and my Grandmother always had beautiful tables and insisted on cloth napkins all the time!

In my professional life as a food and lifestyle writer I have taught etiquette, historical and modern table settings for many years, and admit that I prefer simple tables now but have created many fun and elaborate tables over the years.

The menu: “Jam Pennies” were a tea time favorite of Queen Elizabeth II, as a child and throughout her life. They are small, round bread cutouts spread with butter and jam. 

4. Did you do any research on table setting etiquette before setting your elements at the table?

No, the only thing I knew I would include in the menu were the jam pennies as they were a favourite of the Princesses.

5. Do you plan on entering again next year?

Yes

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6. Do you have any special memory they had of watching the Coronation or the Queen’s funeral (if any)?

The late Queen’s lying in state was televised 24/7 and I was glued to it, I found it so calming and emotional. Of course the funeral was magnificent and moving. It doesn’t matter if it is a coronation, a state funeral, or the launching of a battleship, nothing beats the British, we are the best at pomp and ceremony! My eldest daughter is in the RAF and was involved in the Coronation and I held a tea party (using a ERII Coronation embroidered tea cloth) on the day of the Coronation for a few friends, we all watched it on the television together. One of the best bits was when all of the armed forces involved in the coronation were lined up in gardens of Buckingham Palace and gave their Majesties three cheers – that was fantastic!

More on Amy – Amy Willcock is a successful writer of nine cookery and entertainment books. Born in Chicago, she moved to the UK in 1980. Specialising in country living and game recipes, Amy wrote a regular monthly column for The Shooting Gazette for over 19 years writing about food, country lifestyle and gundogs. During the Covid lockdown in Spring 2020, Amy started a new venture, KBO Cakes. The only way she could “send a slice of home” to her children serving in the forces and at university, was to send them a cake. “Nothing says “I’m thinking about you” more than a homemade cake. Everyone needs a little morale booster every now and then” says Amy. www.kbocakes.co.uk Amy was previously in the hotel business - one of which, The George on the Isle of Wight, had a Michelin starred restaurant. Amy held Lifestyle, Cookery and Aga Workshops teaching people to cook, arrange flowers and set beautiful tables along with how to run a house. Her lifestyle and Aga workshops have been described as ‘finishing schools for people in their 30’s’ and Nigella Lawson wrote in Vogue, “Amy Willcock, hand holder to Aga owners everywhere”. She is a founder member of Yarmouth Women’s Institute, the subject of a BBC 4 documentary, and is a WI Cookery and Preserves judge. Amy has appeared on Market Kitchen, Kirstie’s Homemade home, Celebrity Masterchef, and judged the perfect Sunday Lunch with John Torode and Gregg Wallace on Masterchef and is a regular Food and Lifestyle contributor to local radio. Amy lives in Yorkshire where she manages Warter Priory Shoot office, trains her gun-dogs, and enjoys entertaining her friends and family.

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

“Soiled Lilies” of the Speakeasy?

HBO’s series, Boardwalk Empire, about Atlantic City during Prohibition, was awash in alcohol, in spite of the laws against booze. “Soiled Lilies” along with soused socialites found ways to drink and party the night away. – Photo source, Pinterest

IN CONNECTION with repeal and the effort to do away with the saloon there is a new factor to take into consideration. During these years of the speakeasy, which has been a product of prohibition, the custom of women entering places where liquor has been sold has steadily grown. Originally the habit was the outgrowth of a desire to do something that “wasn't being done,” but as the years went by women found real pleasure in being escorted to this or that place where they could take drink for drink with their companions.

This is one of the problems that will have to be contended with if the speakeasy is to be put out of business. The answer of the moralists and of certain “best people” will be that this practice was confined only to certain night-life creatures of questionable repute. That happens not to be the correct answer. The truth is that women from all walks of life, high and low, became accustomed to this new freedom and availed themselves of it without restraint.

In the old days women never entered saloons, unless they were the “soiled lilies” of the streets or possibly part of a slumming party. They were not wanted there by the men who owned the saloons. But under the new order which came with prohibition, the era of the hip flask, women came to feel just as free as men in regard to liquor. They drank it wherever they could get it. The speakeasy, the night club, obtained a large revenue from women. With a high tax on good liquor the speakeasy with its synthetic gin and corn whisky and its welcome for both men and women is not go- ing to be put out of business as easily as many people thought it would. –Salinas Index, 1933

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Miss Manners Top 10 Faux Pas

Ever since the debut of her etiquette advice column, Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners, has been at the forefront of etiquette authorities and authors worldwide.

A ‘Second Debut’ of a Terrific List of Etiquette Blunders

A ‘faux pas’ is a social blunder committed by a person who does not know better or who should know better. Judith Martin, known in her newspaper column as Miss Manners, identifies common social blunders.

1. Honesty 
When what this means is insulting other people to their faces, and then, when they are hurt, insulting them again by inquiring whether they don’t believe in honesty. 

2. Helpfulness 
When this consists of minding other people’s business by volunteering, unasked, your opinion of how they should lead their lives. 

3. Health-consciousness 
When this is an excuse for spoiling other people’s dinners by telling them that what they are eating, or serving their guests, is poison. 

4. Idealism 
When this leads to humiliating other people for unexceptionable activities–pointing at strangers who are using two sheets of paper towels to dry their hands, for example–that violate your own resolutions.

5. Being True to Your Own Feelings 
When this is cited as a reason for your neglecting duties toward others, such as writing thank-you letters or attending funerals, that you happen to find distasteful. 

6. Self-assertiveness 
When this means elbowing others out of the way so you can get what you want. 

7. Friendliness 
When this is held to be the motivation for taking unauthorized liberties with others, such as addressing strangers by their first names or making personal remarks to acquaintances. 

8. Spontaneity 
When this translates into not being willing to answer invitations or honor acceptances because you feel like doing something else on the night of the party. 

9. Hospitality 
When this consists of inviting your own guests to someone else’s wedding or party, or telling your guests that they are expected to supply the meal or pay for what they ate.

10. Creativity 
When fostering this is cited as an excuse for allowing your children to destroy other people’s property or peace of mind.

As Given to The Book of Lists (1993)

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia