Giving One’s First Dinner in 1878

“In many families, the master and mistress sit opposite at the middle of the table, so that they can attend more especially to all their guests; and this is an excellent plan...” — This was a popular French method of seating for spouses, that was adopted by many in the U.S. at the time. Sitting across from one another, a host and hostess could signal one another silently, without guests being aware.

To young housekeepers, the first dinner given to their friends is fraught with terror. Yet, by observing a few rules, the matter can be made easy enough. First of all, do not crowd your dining-room. If possible, you should invite an equal number of gentlemen and ladies, unless the party is given wholly to gentlemen, when the lady of the house does not appear, but nearest gentleman friend of the family take her place. 

In many families, the master and mistress sit opposite at the middle of the table, so that they can attend more especially to all their guests; and this is an excellent plan. When the guests are seated, the soup is served by the servants, or if the dinner is an informal one, the tureen is placed in front of the hostess, and she sends the plates by the servants, first to the right, and then the left, until all at the table are served. No one asks for soup or fish twice, and the hostess does not offer to replenish your plate, because by so doing, part of the company are usually kept waiting for the next coure. 

Sometimes the plates of soup are put upon the table before the guests are seated and when only one servant is employed this is a good plan to adopt. Oysters and clams in the shells are served before the soup, if at all, and they can also be put in place before the guests are summoned. Beside the napkin should be placed a tiny braided roll, or a square of three inches of bread, a tumbler, and glasses. 

Two large knives and forks are needed, knives at the right and forks at the left of the plate, also a soup spoon, and when the dessert is served, a silver knife, fork, and spoon are placed upon the dessert plate, with a glass finger-bowl and doily. On taking this, the guest places the knife and spoon at the right side, and the fork at the left, and spreads the doily at the left, placing the finger-bowl upon it, and when the repast is finished he dips his fingers quietly into the bowl and dries them upon his napkin. 

At some dinners, the meats are not handed around until they have been carved, and the servants will pass them to the left of each person. The vegetables are then served in a similar manner, and the various sauces and pickles then follow.— The Placer Herald, 1878

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