Gilded Age Etiquette and “Dudes”

“There is a class of those female dudes in Washington who esteem it the proper performance to chatter in bad French at all times and upon all occasions. A bevy of these young women approached Madame de Struve at a reception in the White House, and began chattering in a more or less broken French…” — Baron de Struve and Baroness de Struve. Baron de Struve was a Russian Minister and the Baroness was a highly popular gilded age guest in diplomatic circles. — Public domain image of Baron and Baroness de Struve, courtesy of Wikipedia 

A WASHINGTON EPISODE

That Had a Pointer in It for Those Who Ape Foreign Manners

Baron de Struve, the Russian minister, and his wife are among the most popular people of the diplomatic circle in Washington. They are utterly simple and sincere, and are completely captivated by all things American. Madame de Struve is a very intelligent woman, but utterly without ostentation, and thoroughly a lady in all the best meaning of the term. The baron is as plain a man as a Maryland farmer, and both pay America the delicate compliment of seeking to appear American in all things.

The Baroness one day recently, showed her quick knowledge and appreciation of the fine points of etiquette, and at the same time fittingly rebuked a pert young American miss in a manner that will not soon be forgotten, and that should be told for the benefit of other similar young women who ape foreign airs, cultivate foreign tongues, and think it the proper thing to shrug one’s shoulders, elevate one’s eyebrows, and turn the palms of one’s hands outward in all the essence of depreciation at the mention of their own country.

There is a class of those female dudes in Washington who esteem it the proper performance to chatter in bad French at all times and upon all occasions. A bevy of these young women approached Madame de Struve at a reception in the White House, and began chattering in a more or less broken French, and she replied in her rather lame English:

“Why,” said one of the party, “do you not speak French, madam? I am sure you must be able to speak it.” The Baroness gave them a keen glance and replied, “Yes, I speak French, but not in the house of the American President. Though I speak English poorly, I speak it here as well as I can.”

The party were not dull enough to miss the rebuke in the calm and lady-like remark, and the baroness continued: “I do not like to speak French any where. It is a foolish and frivolous language and I dislike it. Why should one use it when one can express herself in the English, which is the noblest and best language in the world, as America is the greatest and grandest nation in the world. I am proud to speak in the language of the Americans.”

The giddy young misses began to converse in English, at least while in Madame de Struve’s presence. Some of them told the story, and its circulation caused the young lady who wondered that the Baroness did not speak French, some mortification. — Cincinnati Commercial Gazette, 1885

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia