Points on Introduction Etiquette

The gentleman is always present presented to the lady, and when there is a wide difference in age, the younger lady to the older. It is sufficient simply to mention the two names, as “Mrs. Brown, Mr. Gray,” but rather more dignified and elegant to say, “Mrs. Brown, allow me to introduce (or “to present”) Mr. Gray.” 

 Introductions and Points of Etiquette What to Say When You Bring Persons Together

IN MAKING an introduction, the gentleman is always present presented to the lady, and when there is a wide difference in age, the younger lady to the older. It is sufficient simply to mention the two names, as "Mrs. Brown, Mr. Gray," but rather more dignified and elegant to say, "Mrs. Brown, allow me to introduce (or "to present") Mr. Gray." 

When people are introduced to each other, the most graceful thing to do is for each to make a slight bow and pronounce the other's name. It is perfectly good form, however, to say, "How do you do, Mr. Gray?" or "Mrs. Brown?" if one prefers to do so; but it is in reality rather meaningless, as naturally one cannot be greatly concerned about the health of a new acquaintance. Whenever I hear people do this on first being introduced, it always makes me think involuntarily of the story of the old Irishwoman who met a friend one day. "Good morning, Mrs. O'Brien," said she. "How do you do? Not that I care a darn, but just for the sake of conversation." 

Another conventional reply to an introduction is, "I am happy to meet you," or "Delighted to meet you." This is used rather more by men than by women; but it is good form for either sex, A daughter or a son should always introduce young people to the mother or father by saying, "Mother, this is Miss Mary White," or "Father, let me introduce Mr. Smith."

Little points of etiquette are often more puzzling than the really important ones, for the simple reason that of us have thought a great deal about the former, and the latter have never occurred to us until we are confronted by the dilemma. 

Now, whether to rise or not after an introduction is, curiously enough, to a great many people just one of these puzzling little points. When a man is presented to her a lady always bows and remains seated. But when the introduction is made between two ladies. should the one who is sitting down rise to acknowledge it? is the question that is continually cropping up in one form or another. 

On the face of it, to rise immediately would be an awkward thing to do, unless the lady were very old and one wished to show extreme respect. So, in the ordinary form of introduction between two ladies, it would not be necessary for the one who is sitting down to rise unless they entered into conversation, when to rise, if the other lady remained standing, would be imperative.

A hostess always makes a point of rising to receive all visitors as they arrive, unless she is a very elderly lady, and she naturally rises when they approach her to take their leave.

Sometimes at an afternoon tea or "at home," when the hostess happens to be talking to one visitor when another enters the room, the first visitor is in doubt as to whether she should rise on this occasion or remain seated, and often she half rises from her seat, thinks the better of it and reseats herself, all the time rather uncertain whether or not she has done the right thing. 

Now, the best form prescribes that if the last comer is a stranger to her she should take no notice of her approach and should neither rise nor attempt to do so; but if she knows the newcomer, after the hostess has shaken hands and said a few words she should rise and come forward to do likewise.— By Eleanor B. Clapp, 1905

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia