Thursday, July 19, 2018

Socrates, Manners and Teens

 One of the founders of Western philosophy, Socrates (c.470-399BC), was a classical Athenian philosopher and is considered the first moral philosopher of the Western ethical tradition of thought. His words on the manners lacking in youth, continue to resonate today. Also, Bill and Ted thought he was one excellent dude! (Photo source, Pinterest)

Socrates Said It

Has youth really changed very much through the years? Long before there was any such thing as an automobile, a TV set or a surf board, a sage named Socrates made this indictment of youth: “Our youth now love luxury. They have bad manners, contempt for authority. They show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up their food, and tyrannize their teachers.”

The ill-mannered, disrespectful ways of modern youth certainly should not be condoned, but we need not be so fearful about their future if we can tighten the parental reins. The exertion of parental authority certainly is needed as much today as it was in Socrates’ day. A child who respects and obeys his parents is not likely to drift into ways of delinquency. – LaHabra Star News, 1964


Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Wednesday, July 18, 2018

Courtesy is Contagious, By Jupiter!

At the urging of Juno, Jupiter gives a cranky human, Thornton J. Poindexter, a chance to re-do one particular bad day. The message was to be “wisely selfish” and that “courtesy is contagious.”
Veteran actor, Chick Chandler, plays a man who reacts to every rudeness, supposed slight, or mishap around him all day, with rudeness. 
With the help of Jupiter during his do-over, Thornton J. Poindexter has nicely and politely changed his thinking, changed the ways he deals with others, and has made everyone around him happier, and more polite, as well. Oh... and he also got a nice steak instead of “boiled beef,” his newspaper slipped under his doormat as requested, the new bank loan he wanted, and earned some bonus points at the office.

Personnel Head Addresses Future Business Leaders of America

M. Garnett, Manager of the Alpha Beta Markets in the La Habra area, was the speaker at the Future Business Leaders of America meeting last Wednesday at the La Habra High School. Mr. Garnett showed a movie entitled "By Jupiter” which gave students hints on poise, manners and courtesy. After the movie cookies and punch were provided by FBLA members. –LaHabra Star, 1956

1947’s “By Jupiter!” was produced by Marshall Field’s as a way of “showing how all of us can make this world a much more pleasant place to live.”

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Soldiering on in Etiquette

“Never must he lift the curiosity-provoking veil, with which a Moslem women covers her face.” – Above, a cultural guide of countries with majority Muslim populations and how the women should dress accordingly.


Etiquette in North Africa

The army booklet, handed to every soldier when he lands in North Africa, explains to him the how and why of daily life around him. If he enters a bakery, he must remove his shoes, since the baker slices the bread out of the oven on to the floor, and customers object to dirt tracked in from the street. He should drink three cups of tea, if offered, but never four, and even if left-handed, must eat always with his right. 

Never must he lift the curiosity-provoking veil, with which a Moslem women covers her face. Uncle Sam’s recognition for the necessity of overcoming ignorance of unfamiliar ways, heartens with its realism. There’s an old saying— “l cannot hate whom I understand.” When each nation deals sympathetically with the other’s customs, first steps toward a peaceful world will have been taken. We can enjoy each other’s differences, rather than despise them. If true for individuals, why not for nations? – Sotoyome Scimitar, 1943

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Saturday, July 14, 2018

Etiquette and the Homburg Cure

Bad Homburg vor der Höhe, is a former royal spa in Germany. Today it continues to offer traditional health treatments, rest and rejuvenation. The drinking of the water is the great feature of the cure at Homburg, but bathing is also employed. Edward VII was often a guest. It was he who introduced the Homburg hat and permanent turn-up trousers. He underwent fasting cures at Homburg 32 times. “The Prince of Wales takes his cure like a little man, promising himself, no doubt, that there is a good time coming. It takes a close observer to detect in him the slender boy who visited us in 1860. He is not tall, and is stout, and wore in the park at Homburg a suit of the color of a cinnamon bear, a calico shirt, red cravat, untanned leather shoes, soft brown hat, with a broad figured ribbon, carried a stick, and was followed by an Esquimaux dog, white as snow and too dignified to wag his tail.” – 1887


Albert Edward and “The Cure” at Homburg

People do not get introduced to the Prince of Wales at Homburg through running after him. The etiquette of the place is not to notice him. Not one person in a dozen who passes him on the walks even looks at him. His face is as familiar as that of one of the trees in the park, and makes no sensation. “The cure” at Homburg is an exciting business. One must be up at 7 in the morning at latest, and the usual course is to take one glass of water from the favorite spring at 7 o'clock and walk for a quarter of an hour ; then a second glass and a walk for another quarter of an hour ; a third glasa and a walk for an hour. This brings breakfast time, and one is allowed for breakfast two eggs and one cup of coffee without milk or sugar. After breakfast, bathe in a decoction of pine leaves. Luncheon at 1:00, two glasses of water and an hour’s walk from 4 to 5 ; dinner at 6:00, and the fashionable hour to retire is 9. There are no sauces or uncooked vegetables; no raw fruit or salads or wine, except a little hock, permitted. One who keeps this up for three weeks is believed to get the full benent of “the cure,” and to be ready for another season of pleasure or hard work. 


The Prince of Wales takes his cure like a little man, promising himself, no doubt, that there is a good time coming. It takes a close observer to detect in him the slender boy who visited us in 1860. He is not tall, and is stout, and wore in the park at Homburg a suit of the color of a cinnamon bear, a calico shirt, red cravat, untanned leather shoes, soft brown hat, with a broad figured ribbon, carried a stick, and was followed by an Esquimaux dog, white as snow and too dignified to wag his tail. The Prince generally walked with a rush, as if he had a severe duty to perform and meant to set through it, and he was always accompanied by a lady, usually some one else's sister, occasionally his own sister, the Princess Christian. He was not an obtrusive person, and there were no ceremonies about, only he was allowed to go about his business, having for the time the coveted freedom of a private citizen; and those who met him said he seemed to be a companionable man, who asked many questions with much intelligence, and did not have to have many jokes explained to him. If he desires to form an acquaintance, we presume his overtures are rarely declined.

We are not aware that the American minister has recorded a “reverence” for the Prince. He often meets the Prince, and testifies to his good fellowship. The Prince told him that he was anxious to meet Mr. Blaine, and when he did meet Blaine he wanted to see him again. The Prince of Wales possesses points of peculiar interest. He may very soon be the King of Great Britain and Ireland and the Emperor of India. But he is not playing the despot. He is as careful in the cultivation of the arts of popularity as if he were a candidate for the Presidency. He is one of the closest students of current history, and he is much of the time very laboriously engaged in public duties, many of which are thrown upon him by the widowhood and infirmities of his mother. He has made it a point to be polite to Americans. Is that the reason why he should be particularly obnoxious to us? It is not bad policy to cultivate pleasant relations with the other English-speaking people?

The education of the Prince, as the Prince, has of course been a detriment to men, for royalty is a sham that must pass away. But few men know so well the weakness of it as the Prince of Wales. He is a very good public speaker, and there are many of his speeches that could not have been written for him and memorized. Those who know him say he speaks very well indeed, and he has a manly voice, and his universal reputation is that he is gifted in tact, and that he is good humored and studious to please. He is a great improvement on the run of Princes of Wales, and should have credit for it. – Cincinnati Commercial Gazette, 1887

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Friday, July 13, 2018

Curious Conjugal Etiquette

In parts of the Fiji Islands, a husband and wife, if they wished to meet, must meet in secret ; a similar secrecy is or was obligatory among the Circassians, and even among the Hottentots.
 
Above – 
Samuel Daniell’s “Korah Hottentots,” or “Korah-Khoikhoi dismantling their huts, preparing to move to new pastures.” aquatint by Samuel Daniell, 1805 (public domain image)
Old Matrimonial Etiquette and Customs 

Among primitive tribes, some very strange rules of etiquette appeared to govern the matrimonial relationship. Convention prevented the Yoruba wife from either speaking to, or even seeing her husband, if it could be avoided, and the Aleutian islanders had the same regulation about speaking. In parts of the Fiji Islands, a husband and wife, if they wished to meet, must meet in secret ; a similar secrecy is or was obligatory among the Circassians, and even among the Hottentots. But the African Kingdom of Futa bears off the palm in these respects, if an old traveler is to be credited, who assured us that wives there were so bashful as never to let their husbands see them without a veil for three years after their marriage.


The same sort of feeling was manifested in other curious customs. Among the Esquimaux, even in cases where the course of true love ran its smoothest and accorded fully with parental settlements, certain old women had to be sent to drag the bride forcibly to her husband's hut, she being obliged under the penalty of an ill name to “make as if it went against the grain and as if she were much ruffled at it.” A Kamschatkan girl, however well disposed she may have been to her future spouse, made it a point of honor to pretend to refuse him, and the form of force on his side and of resistance on hers, was in any case to be regularly performed. And the wild tribe, the Hos of India, regarded it as the correct thing for a wife to run away from her husband and to tell her friends that she neither loved him nor would ever see him again, while he in his turn was expected to display great anxiety for his lass and when he had found his wife, after diligent search, carried her home again by main force. – Gentleman's Magazine, 1888


Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Singled Out by Russian Etiquette

Single women were singled out – Etiquette required that Sofia Kovalevskaya, who went on to become a celebrated mathematician, be married to attend a Russian university. (Image- public domain)

Where Girls Must Marry

In Russia, if a girl desires to study at either of the universities, etiquette requires that she should be married. Accordingly she goes through the civil form of marriage with one of the men students, whom she may never have seen before and perhaps, may never speak to again.

These marriages are perfectly legal, and if the contracting parties like each other, they are united for life, but otherwise the marriage is dissolved when their university course is finished and both are free to marry again. Sofia Kovalevskaya, the celebrated mathematician, went through the civil marriage ceremony with a student whom she then saw for the first time, but who eventually became her husband.— Home Notes, 1901




Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Sunday, July 8, 2018

A Barbarous Etiquette?

Bertie was, according to Professor Jane Ridley, “the first English Prince to visit Jerusalem since Richard the Lionheart, but he got on much better with the Muslims than the Crusader did.” – 
Nearly 40 years prior to becoming King Edward VII, young Prince Albert, known as Bertie, was sent by Queen Victoria on a Royal tour of Egypt and the Holy Places of Palestine and Syria.This trip became the template for the British Royals and tours we know of today, not least because it was the first that the people could actually see as an official photographer, Francis Bedford, accompanied the Prince. While on the tour, in a move that even today’s Royal Princes might consider a step too far – Bertie got a tattoo on his forearm  – five crosses forming a Crusader’s Jerusalem cross.  



The order issued by the King of Great Britain for his first entry into Parliament includes a requirement that women participating shall wear dresses cut low. The affair will take place in the afternoon. The order must, therefore, shock the American flunkies, who maintain that a swallow-tail coat and a low-necked gown must never be worn before 6 o'clock, summer or winter. There are men and women who profoundly wish that neither a swallow-tail coat nor a low-necked dress should ever be worn, with an exception in favor of cutting out the dress bodice modestly for coolness in the heated term. The objection to the Royal and Imperial British order for low-necked dresses when the Emperor of India opens the houses of Parliament is, however, purely humane. 

Every woman who can will endeavor to be present on so exciting an occasion. The order is absolute as to exposure of the shoulders and bust to winter weather, whatever it may be that day. Pneumonia is as prevalent in London as in Chicago, perhaps more so. The doctors will have a profitable increase of business following the day the Emperor of India appears before Parliament. Nor should the new Monarch be hastily censured for this barbarous ritual. He has said that he will follow the steps of the late Monarch, who never relaxed or suspended this rule at her drawing rooms, always held by day, and always the cause of serious illness, with their full proportion of consequent deaths. This is one of the objects for which Monarchies are maintained — to thin out the population.— Chicago Chronicle, 1901

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia