Wedding Planning Etiquette

It is proper etiquette to send your gift ahead of the actual wedding date. If that is not possible, send it soon afterward, when the couple have returned from their honeymoon. Unless the wedding is held at the family home, or it is the cultural norm, it's not a good idea to bring your gift to the wedding ceremony or reception itself. If the bride and groom are leaving immediately from the reception to a honeymoon destination, they will have to arrange for someone else to pack up the gifts safely and take them away. – Above ~1960’s bride is helped by her Wedding Consultant, Anita Farrington Earl

A Wedding Consultant Tends to Hundred Little Details... An interview with a Wedding Consultant 

How long does it take to plan a big wedding? 

“It should be six months but it can be done in three,” Earl answers. The Wedding Consultant or Wedding Planner stays through every rehearsal and is on hand throughout the ceremony to zip up the bride’s dress or signal the organist to begin the music. 

Etiquette 

Before the wedding she does the planning, gives a list of etiquette, sets down the time schedule and gives check lists to each member of the party. She will assist the bride in selection of her gown and trousseau and the costumes of the mothers and bridal party. She aids arrangements for out-of-town guests, arranges the gift display, plans the bridesmaid’s luncheon, a tea for viewing presents and the rehearsal dinner. When it comes to the ceremony, she worries over every detail and even attends to the remuneration to the organist, police and minister. When it comes to the reception she will arrange for maid service, music, tips, has six pages of appropriate toasts and even suggests the order of dances.

Dance 

An example of dance etiquette, “As soon as the groom dances with the bride her father cuts in permitting the groom to ask the mother of the bride while the father and mother of the groom dance. “Then the father of the bride dances with the mother of the groom freeing the father of the groom to dance with the bride. “The best man then dances with the mother of the bride permitting the groom to dance with his mother.” Sounds complicated but it’s really not difficult, Mrs. Earl says. Mrs. Earl will make hair appointments; check to be sure the ring has been selected; make certain the couple gets a license; she suggests the bride break in her new shoes around the house before the ceremony; packs an emergency kit with sewing items, pins, kleenex, etc; and even suggest the bride call her family the next day to thank them for the wonderful affair. 

Invitations 

Invitations must be received three weeks ahead; the rule of thumb for ushers is one for every 50 guests; record gifts as received and send thank-you notes right away, she suggests. Quality always comes first keeping within the budget. Many florists or department stores, mostly sales girls, pretend to counsel on clothes and gifts, but they are not experts. It takes finesse and guidance, learned by experience, to create a wedding. You hire a professional to design a room why not a wedding, Mrs. Earl suggests. –Palos Verdes Peninsula News, 16 June 1966

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia