Gilded Age Caudle Party Etiquette

According to Encyclopedia Brittanica, a candle cup was originally a “small, two-handled silver cup, usually with a cover, originally made in England during the second half of the 17th century and possibly used for caudle—warm ale or wine mixed with bread or gruel, eggs, sugar, and spices—which was administered to women after childbirth and to convalescents.” By the gilded age in the late 19th century, “Caudle Parties” were a modern nod to days of old. No “administering” was needed. —The Holyoke Caudle Cup, silver c. 1690, by John Coney, Fogg Art Museum … Exhibit in the Fogg Art Museum, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts, USA. This artwork is in the public domain because the artist died more than 70 years ago.

The modern caudle party is given when the child is about six weeks old, and is quite a separate affair from the Christening, the church having objected in some cases to having the two celebrated at the same time. Caudle parties, simply in the nature of a name-festival, are frequently given when the Christening is not observed.

Invitations are sent out one week in advance, and are in the following form: Mr. and Mrs. Brown request your company, Wednesday afternoon, at three. Caudle. 125 Vancouver Street. No presents expected.

The words, “no presents,” need not prevent any who wish from making a gift, but relieves those who may not be prepared.

The phrase, “Caudle Party,” is somewhat difficult to define, but the name and the custom have come down from olden times. It used then to be the habit to serve all who called with inquiries and congratulations on the arrival of a little stranger, with a kind of spiced gruel, flavored with rum or Madeira, and known as “caudle.” This was served in china cups having two handles, so they could be passed from one to another. These were called “caudle cups,” and are much prized heirlooms in more than one old family. This ceremony was then observed when the child was three days old; now the “candle party” is celebrated when it is at least six weeks old.

The mother receives her guests in some elaborate house gown, the baby in robes of state is on exhibition for a short time, and the guests are served with “ caudle” in the form of an oatmeal gruel, long and slowly boiled with raisins and spices, and fine old Madeira or rum added at the last until the beverage is “to the Queen's taste.”— From Maude C. Cooke’s “Social Life or The Manners and Customs of Polite Society,” 1896

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