A Washington DC Debut

The breakfast, with 35 tables at Raucher’s, was designed to outshine the famous Dolly Madison breakfast of last year and it would be almost a heresy to say it did not. —Public domain image of former American First Lady, Edith Wilson, photographed in 1915.

MRS. WILSON RECEIVED INTO WASHINGTON SOCIETY

WASHINGTON, April 5. When the first real official society function of the administration — the “debut” of Mrs. Woodrow Wilson — swung into being shortly after noon today, there was not one soupçon of politics to be found. Mrs. Wilson hates politics. and had refused to be a party to any event, however harmless and purely social, that had any political leaning. So when the introductory breakfast by the women of Washington was ar- ranged, the real opening of the White House season, the affair was as thoroughly representative of all factions that you could not say which or who was predominant. The breakfast, with 35 tables at Raucher’s, was designed to outshine the famous Dolly Madison breakfast of last year and it would be almost a heresy to say it did not.

Great care had to be employed to keep the tabooed political situation off the menu, because Mrs. Wilson had declined with polite armness any invitation to be chief guest at a breakfast of the Woman’s Democratic Club. So it remained for Mrs. Stephen B. Ayres to initiate a breakfast that would thrust all such entanglements far away.

Officially backing the breakfast were such organizations of women as the Daughters of the American Revolution. the Colonial Dames, the Washington Club, the Southern Relief Society and the Congressional Club, besides scores of individual women of official and social Washington.

Mrs. John W. Kern, wife of the senior senator from Indiana, was designated as toastmistress and at her right hand was seated the guest of honor. At Mrs. Kern's left was Mrs. Thomas Riley Marshall, wife of the vice president, and at Mrs. Wilson's right sat Mrs. William Jennings Bryan, wife of the secretary of state. The wives of other cabinet members were placed in carefully selected order beside these leaders of the administrative set great diplomacy having been employed to make the seating seem accidental, yet harmonious with recognized rules of the etiquette of the capital.

One of the little ceremonials at the One of the little ceremonials at the bead table was the pledging of one another by Mrs. Wilson, Mrs. Marshall, Mrs. Bryan and Mrs. Kern with a great colonial mace from the house of burgesses of Virginia. This over, the attention of the guests was turned to the menu and table chat.

When the final morsel had vanished and last sip of coffee had gone the way of all coffee, the guests gave ladylike gasps of content and turned to listen to an illustrated lecture by Abby Baker on “The Historic White House.” This discourse told of previous chief ladies of the land and of the many social events that had their being in the executive mansion. Little sidelights on people and things, told in a delightful vein, made the talk more of a personal reminiscence than a report from historical data.

Those who helped Mrs. Ayres get up and execute the breakfast were Mrs. Matthew T. Scott, Mrs. James W. Pinchot, Mrs. Henry F. Dimock of Washington and New York, Mrs. Albert Covington Janin, Mrs. Richey. Mrs. John Hays Hammond, Mrs. J. Taylor Ellyson of Richmond. Va., Miss Nannie Randolph Reath, Mrs. Duncan U. Fletcher and Mrs. Albert B. Cummins of Iowa.

It was all very select and very proper yet more than 350 women had secured tickets. There was no particular restriction because it had been given out very early in the new administration that “swell” doings were not on the four-year social program at all. And yet some who have attended other like functions said it was just as recherche as any and that Mrs. Wilson's debut would stand in history in just as glowing colors as the introductions of a dozen other mistresses of the White House.

Mrs. Pinchot is one of the leaders of the movement to abolish the burdensome “duty calls” which have proved so confusing to society at the capital. She proposes to rouse sentiment among members of the Congressional Club to carry out its primary object of mutual improvement. In previous adininistrations, Mrs. Pinchot declares, the women have deluged one another with calling cards, which came to mean little. “A machine could do that work as well,” she said. With the prospective “simplicity” of this administration, Mrs. Pinchot believes much of this useless “calling” can be dispensed with. — United Press Association, 1913

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Gilded Age Social Season at the Capital

 

 

BEAUTY HARD AT WORK – THE DAILY TOIL OF THE WASHINGTON FASHIONABLE SEASON

Fair Maids and Matrons Who Are "In the Swim" Compelled to Utilize Every Waking Moment to Fulfill Their Social Obligations

SOCIETY'S season at Washington starts with the White House reception New Year’s day, and closes with the beginning of Lent. During that time all is gold and glitter. A senator’s wife who has been at the capital eighteen winters says the average of entertainments now is nearly 500 that she did not during the season. By that she did not mean afternoon receptions, but everything that required a bid, luncheons, teas, dinners, evening receptions, musicales and balls. 

Bless me! you say, there is no woman living who can attend 500 affairs between New Year’s and Lent. And you are right; but there are women who receive invitations to all, and only send regrets to one-fourth. Take one of last year’s debutantes. She kept a diary of her goings, and with one luncheon, two or three teas, as many evening receptions and a dinner here and there, her category summed up 395 entertainments, with a deficit of a third as many to which she had sent regrets. There were only two theatre parties in her list, as she said that was the one form of amusement she had to omit. 

Every society woman omits that, however, and during the season there is less theatre going than in any other city. The debutante whom I have quoted had the task of a Titan, for she must needs make from two to three calls at every house at which she was entertained. First the formal call, then the return, and finally the party call. No woman in Washington, save Mrs. Benjamin Harrison, is so high that she need not pay calls. The square of bristol board tyrannizes over all. 

How did the debutante perform all her duties? By being all ready for the season when it began. Not an inch of ribbon or lace did she buy during that time. She had a maid to care for her clothes, and every moment she was not going she was sleeping. It is an easy thing to sleep from 2 a. m. to 12 m., and that is what a Washington belle always learns to do. Not two score entertainments in a year ever go much beyond 1:30 a. m. Every woman who is entertained, must entertain. A luncheon, a series of teas, a dinner and possibly a ball are demanded at each Washington house. The executive mansion is, of course, the center of gayety. 

During the season there are at least eight formal entertainments there. First the reception New Year's Day, then two receptions in January to the diplomatic corps and the congress and judiciary respectively, and two in February to the army and navy, and last of all to the general public. These five are obligatory, but the President may give as many or as few dinners as he chooses. The table in the state dining room seats from thirty-six to fifty guests. The usual number is four. Two in January alternate weeks with the receptions to the cabinet and diplomatic corps, and two in February to the Supreme Court and congress. Ex-President Cleveland only gave three the first two years of his administration, omitting the last, and inviting whatever senators or representatives he chose to the other three. Ladies, of course, are invited to all these dinners and receptions.

The mistress of the White House has not the care of an ordinary housewife over these entertainments. She gives a little attention to the decorating of the suite of parlors, but her only other duty is to stand at the head of the receiving line and greet the guests, no small task when the throng mounts into the thousands. In addition to formal entertainments the mistress of the White House usually holds drawing rooms every Saturday afternoon, and receives people by appointment nearly every day in the week. It is only by the most careful allotting of time that she can do all that is expected of her.

Until the opening of the season Mrs. Harrison was the mistress of her own time, but the stroke of 11, Jan. 1, made her its slave. Before that time she made informal calls upon the ladies of the cabinet and her intimate friends, went out to little dinners, was seen once or twice a week at the theatres, and seemed not to have a care. Now she is not expected to go or be entertained at any house at the capital. She may transcend the law as Mrs. Cleveland did toward the end of the season, and be present at her cabinet ladies’ Wednesday receptions.

There is not the least bit of Jeffersonian simplicity in White House etiquette. Every year it gains a more ironclad code. Uncle Sam's mails are not retained to carry White House invitations, but mounted messengers fly from Georgetown to Capitol Hill, and from the Potomac to Columbia Heights distributing the cards. And woe betide him who does not send an answer within two days. Nothing but sickness, the death of a near relative or absence from the city can excuse a declination of the president's invitation. His request is a command.

The receptions to the diplomatic corps and the army and navy divide the glory of the winter. A peep into either is like a glimpse of “The Arabian Nights” tales congealed into one. The first is very stately, I assure you. Every diplomat dons his court dress, and the bullion displayed would fill a vault in the treasury building. Then, the swords! They clank in a way that suggests a tourney, and even the most colorless imagination is disappointed when their owners pace pacifically around the the big east room for half an hour and retire. 

The ladies of the corps always wear their most elaborate costumes and finest jewels, and many are the magnificent pairs of shoulders glistening with diamonds upon which the light falls. The question of precedence at this reception used to bother even Presidents, but now the whole affair is ranked by time of service. Friends of the President and his wife and people of high degree are bidden to meet the foreigners. Next to the White House the home of the Vice President will be a center for society this winter.

The position of the wife of a cabinet minister is not a sinecure. They are expected to keep open house every Wednesday until Lent begins, to assist the mistress of the White House at all her receptions, and to carry on their special duty to society by receptions and dinners. They are all expected to call upon Mrs. Morton and the ladies of the Supreme Court and senate, and nearly all of them had their full hundred calls made before Dec. 15. Their daughters usually accompany them on the rounds. The only alleviation they have from the binding rule is that they need not call upon the “day” of each person. 

As they remain but two minutes they can call upon the “day” of each person. As they remain but two minutes they can make from sixteen to twenty-six calls in an afternoon, which means from 3 to 5. Only one thing is incumbent on a senator’s or representative’s wife, and that is to receive Thursday and return all calls made upon her. She need not give a dinner or card reception unless she desires, and not more than a score of senators’ wives and twice as many wives of representatives ever do much more. Much is demanded of the speaker’s wife if she lives in her own house.

Outside of this vast official circle, which includes the diplomatic corps, there is an equally large resident population who, it is conceded, make up the exclusive society of the capital. They entertain in a year even more lavishly than the official circle, for nearly all of the “old families” of the capital have wealth. – Miriam Hamerton, Associated Press, 1891

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette of Prospective First Ladies

Although a lot has been spoken and written about the capabilities of Presidential candidates in the coming campaign, very little has been said of the woman who may share the success of any one of them. Of course, Mrs. Franklin D. Roosevelt, wife of New York's Governor, who is the leading Democratic candidate, needs no introduction to Americans. Born a Roosevelt, she kept the illustrious name intact by marrying one. Mrs. Roosevelt is no stranger to polities and diplomatic usage, so in the event of her husband's victory in the coming campaign she would fit into the role of White House hostess like a hand into a glove. Mrs. John Nance Garner, wife of the Speaker of the House, would also make an ideal “First Lady.” Since her marriage in 1895, she has been “Texas Jack’s” secretary and advisor. Their ideal partnership constitutes as romantic a story as any in the pages of fiction. Then there is Mrs. Newton D. Baker, who is equipped for the job of presiding at the White House by reason of her association with diplomatic society during her husband's tenure of office as Secretary of War in the late President Wilson's cabinet. One unusual possibility deserves mention. In the event of Governor George White of Ohio being nominated and elected, he will bring the youngest “First Lady” in history to the White House– his 24-year-old daughter, Mary, who is now his official hostess in the Gubernatorial mansion of Ohio.

These Potential First Ladies Well Qualified for Position

Wives of Three Leading Democratic Candidates and Daughter of a Fourth Ideally Suited for Job of White House Hostess.

WASHINGTON, June 17. Although it is an oft-repeated truth that every American boy may consider himself a potential President of these United States, we rarely, if ever, hear a word about the prospects of the girls who are destined to marry these boys. A strange oversight this, seeing that it is perfectly logical that if every boy has a chance of becoming "First Gentleman" of the land every girl has an equal chance of acquiring the coveted title of "First Lady."

Take a few of the present candidates for the Democratic nomination for the Presidency: Governor Franklin D. Roosevelt, of New York: Speaker John Nance Garner, of Texas; Newton D. Baker, of Cleveland, Ohio, and Governor George White, of Ohio. The capabilities of these candidates are well known, but how much is known of the woman who will share the success of any one of them? Of course, Mrs. Roosevelt, by reason of her distinguished family tree, is the more familiar of the potential “First Ladies.” Born a Roosevelt, she kept the illustrious name intact by marrying one on March 17, 1905. Most of Mrs. Roosevelt's life has been spent in the service of her family and more than a half-dozen civic movements.

Mrs. Roosevelt is no stranger to national politics, having proved her metal on many a campaign platform. In the last Presidential campaign, she fought tooth and nail in support of Alfred E. Smith, the Democratic standard-bearer. Ironically, Smith is her husband's bitterest opponent in the present fight for nomination.In the event of her husband's victory in the coming campaign, Mrs. Roosevelt would fit into the role of White House hostess like a hand in a glove.

Mrs. John Nance Garner, wife of the Speaker of the House, though not as widely known as Mrs. Roosevelt, would also make an 18 carat “First Lady.” Since “Texas Jack” married the former Ettie Rheiner, in November, 1895, she has been his secretary, helper and advisor. There is very little about politics that Mrs. Garner does not know. The story of Speaker John and his wife deserves a whole volume to itself if justice is to be done to one of the most ideal partnerships in politics or any other field. Their struggles and triumphs constitute a romantic story rarely found outside the pages of fiction.

Then there is Mrs. Newton D.Baker, who, as Elizabeth Leopold, of Pottstown, Pa., married the present Democratic “Dark Horse,” in 1902. Mrs. Baker would also make an admirable White House Lady, knowing, as she does, the highways and byways of social and diplomatic etiquette. Though her. home is in Cleveland, O., Mrs.. Baker has been established as one of the capital's most popular hostesses since the day in 1916 when her husband took office as Secretary of War in the cabinet of the late-President Wilson. She has persistently worked for the cause of working women for many years; knows politics inside out and her pet ambition is to be an artist and to sing. Though she is not very hopeful of her husband's chances of being named to carry the banner of Democracy, Mrs. Baker is the most consistent admirer of the “Dark Horse.”

While on the subject of potential “First Ladies,” one unusual possibility deserves mention. In the event that Governor George White, of Ohio, should win the nomination. and be victorious at the polls, he would bring the youngest “First Lady” in history to the White House. She is his daughter, Mary, 24, the eldest of five children. Governor White is a widower and when he was elected Governor of Ohio, in 1930, Mary automatically be came his official hostess. Who knows, she may yet rule the social functions in the House of Presidents. – Calexico Chronicle, 1932

 Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and White House Mistresses

 

During her residence in the White House, Mrs. Cleveland stood up in all the beauty of her young womanhood and bravely shook hands with the mighty public until she had to take her rings and gloves off, until her fingers were swollen, her arm was lame and her hand was like a puff ball. After every reception her maid had a solution ready to bathe her dislocated members, and it was often necessary to rip her sleeve up in order to get it off. 

Presidents’ Wives: Different Views of Different Mistresses of the White House

Mrs. James A. Garfield never got into harmony with the ostentation, excitement and vulgarity of public life. She is a woman of innate refinement, very domestic in her tastes, and the presumptions of the public grated on her. She could not reconcile herself to the privileges assumed by agents representing photographic and advertising companies, business firms, newspapers, artists and charitable, industrial and social organizations, and when she sent down word that she did not wish to become an adverting medium, that she did not want to be photographed, painted, interviewed or entertained, and that she begged to decline the testimonial of the club to which she was a stranger, she was most severely and cruelly assailed by message, letter and paragraph. 

In all her public life she did not receive ten reporters, says the New York World. Scores applied to her for audience, and very often poverty was offered as a plea for the coveted interview. To these importunators she frequently sent a sealed envelope containing a bill and a “please excuse me from newspaper comment” written on the back of her visiting card. She used to say that she “felt like a baby elephant” every time she received with the President. While fully recognizing her obligations as the wife of the Chief Magistrate, she argued at home and among her friends that she was not a politician, was not in office, and in no way compelled to make un exhibition of herself, her home and her children. There was no time between the election and burial of her husband, when she would not have gladly paid the newspaper writers and artists to decline the work assigned them. 

These very sentiments are entertained by Mrs. Harrison, who dreads publicity, suffers from the demands made upon her by strangers and shrinks from the ordeal of handshaking, committees and delegates bearing testimonials, resolutions or documents inquiring her approval. Last winter, while a member of Mrs. Wanamaker's Delsarte class, she entered the drawing-room just as Mrs. Russell was showing the Wanamaker girls how to bow. There was the little bow of the head, which would suffice for an employee in the “depot”; there was the warmer salutation, with an advancing of the chest, for the formal caller: there was a still more cordial salute, accompanied by a responsive movement of the head and torso, and finally the low, grand, sweeping bow from the head to the ankles, expressive of great respect, such as the Queen is accustomed to receive. 

Mrs. Harrison listened with undivided attention, and when the lesson was ended asked to be presented to Mrs. Russell, and during the conversation that ensued, talked very lively to the New York aesthete. She referred to the Grand Army reception when she carried a fan and bouquet, so as to have ample excuse for not shaking hands, and to which innovation the Logan division took swift violent offense. “I was sorry,” Mrs. Harrison said. “I did not mean to show an indisposition to kindness or courtesy, but it was a physical impossibility for me to extend my hand. Had I been permitted to shake hands it would have been different, but to have others do it was more than my strength was equal to.” Mrs. Harrison is very frank on the subject, and while disposed to be pleasant and gracious refuses to manifest for strangers the cordiality that only her friends are entitled to. 

The approach of a stalwart from the mud lakes and prairies of the Sieto, Des Moines and Kansas rivers, with beaming face and open hand, gives her a chill, the discomfort of which is increased by the vigorous fanning necessary to the safety of her wrist. This aversion of the First Lady to cross hands with the grasping multitude will be the means of amending the etiquette of the reception and draw rooms of Washington, if not the United States. 

During her residence in the White House, Mrs. Cleveland stood up in all the beauty of her young womanhood and bravely shook hands with the mighty public until she had to take her rings and gloves off, until her fingers were swollen, her arm was lame and her hand was like a puff ball. After every reception her maid had a solution ready to bathe her dislocated members, and it was often necessary to rip her sleeve up in order to get it off. This girl bride liked the public, and the affection was returned. She was gracious obliging and indulgent to a degree, but impertinence was met by revolt. She sent to Paris for her clothes because she was too well known in Washington, Albany and New York to buy them at home. When she wanted shoes, bonnets or gloves, an order was sent to her dress-maker, who purchased them in her own name. 

Mrs. General Grant has not one adverse criticism to pass on the great unwashed. She admits that she cried like a baby the day she left the White House. A special train carried the General's party to New York, but she says, “I watered the journey with my tears. The General stood between me and any annoyances that might have occurred, but I was very happy; my life was eight years of bliss and one round of pleasure.”– San Francisco Call, 1890

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Supreme Court Etiquette of Old

 

Pictured above, Chief Justice Morrison-Waite . Morrison-Waite was the Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court from 1874 to 1888. At the time, the wife of the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court was considered the official “First Lady” of the United States, as the Supreme Court positions were appointments for life, unlike the position of President, which is merely a temporary position, or “temp job.”

In former times, lawyers were expected to appear before the Court in full evening dress, but that custom has been relaxed, and the customary dress for members of the Bar is a black frock coat and black trousers. Occasionally, though, a deviation from this is observed, chiefly among lawyers from the West, where such things are not closely attended to, and the Court passes it over. But when a Western lawyer some time ago presumed to appear before the Court without a cravat, the Justices caused it to be intimated to him that such free and easy attire was not agreeable to them. 

The Supreme Court takes precedence of every other body in the Government, ranking in official etiquette next to the President and his official family. On formal occasions, the members walk next the President and his Cabinet, and they are entertained at dinner at the White House before either House of Congress. On the day they organize for the full term — the first Monday in October — they immediately proceed to the White House to pay their respects formally to the President. As soon as the members of the Court are ushered into the East Room, the President appears. To keep the Court waiting five minutes would be an unpardonable breach of etiquette. — Daly Alta, 1886

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Letitia Baldrige’s White House Memories

In 1961, Baldrige moved from public relations director of Tiffany & Co. in New York to the job as Mrs. Kennedy’s chief of staff. Baldrige remembered how that First Lady turned the White House into a warm, festive place— abandoning a large U-shaped table used for state dinners and substituting round tables of eight so guests found it easier to converse.

The Late-Letitia Baldrige Shared a Houseful of Memories

Letitia Baldrige, who was Jackie Kennedy’s chief of staff at the White House, shared her memories of the First Ladies.

Baldrige spoke at the Richard Nixon Library and Birthplace in Yorba Linda on “The Evolving Role of the First Lady” as part of the library’s seven-part Distinguished Speaker series, “The Lady of the House: Great Wives of Great Presidents.” About 300 guests, most of them women, paid $8.50 each for the talk and tea.

White House Days

Wearing a gold blazer and Barbara Bush-style pearls, Baldrige began her talk by praising the “magnificent library” that “brings back so many memories.”

Baldrige’s association with the White House dates back to her childhood. As the daughter of Malcolm Baldrige, once a Nebraska congressman, she was invited to the White House Easter egg hunt at age 4 during the last year of the Hoover Administration. “I’ve had a charmed life,” she said.

In 1961, Baldrige moved from public relations director of Tiffany & Co. in New York to the job as Mrs. Kennedy’s chief of staff. Baldrige remembered how that First Lady turned the White House into a warm, festive place— abandoning a large U-shaped table used for state dinners and substituting round tables of eight so guests found it easier to converse.

“Young America started to copy, copy, copy. We received countless letters from women saying, ‘Everyone tells me I look exactly like Mrs. Kennedy,’ ” Baldrige said. Many wanted to know how the First Lady did her hair.

First Ladies’ Clout

“The First Lady has a lot of power,” Baldrige said. “I hope Hillary Clinton realizes that.”

A Republican who switched parties during the Kennedy years and later switched back again, Baldrige has not yet been called on by Clinton for advice, as she has for four previous First Ladies.

“I’m all for Hillary Clinton. I want her to avoid the barbs of women who hate women who work,” she says. “But I’m known as a Republican in Washington. I’m probably the last person she’d call.”

The author of 12 books including “The Complete Guide to New Manners for the ‘90s,” Baldrige held to one of the golden rules of etiquette and never spoke ill of anyone.

On Rosalynn Carter: “She had beautiful manners and wrote wonderful notes.”

On Nancy Reagan: “She had a tremendous flair . . . and was given a bad rap by the press.”

On Pat Nixon: “She did a tremendous amount for the White House.”

“All of the First Ladies were good, creative and strong,” she said. “I’ve always said they should be paid.”

Tea Time

After the talk, guests sampled tea and scones in the library’s lobby and stood in line to meet Baldrige. Clara Jane Nixon, sister-in-law to Richard Nixon, had never met Baldrige until the tea but said her talk brought back memories of her own visits to the White House. “The talk let me relive a few experiences,” she said. “We used to visit the White House, and we even stayed in the queen’s bedroom.”

Guests also visited the library’s exhibit, “White House Style: Formal Gowns of the First Ladies,” which featured 22 inaugural and other gowns reproduced from the Smithsonian’s collection of originals.

— By Kathryn Bold, Jan. 1993

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia