Confusion Over Finger Bowl Doily Use

By 1934, doilies had possibly fallen out of fashion in some circles, but they were certainly still used in many homes as part of the “finger bowl ballet.” It’s possible that this woman writing to Mrs. Post believed that the doily’s intended use was to wipe the fingers, when it is merely to sit under the finger bowl, whether on the plate or above the place setting, to the upper left of the dessert plate.

Dear Mrs. Post: While dining in the house of a stranger the other night I noticed that her waitress brought in a dessert plate with a fine lace doily on it and on top of that, a finger bowl. The silver for dessert was already at the places. I had never had a finger bowl brought in just this way. My hostess removed it and the doily from the dessert plate and put the bowl down on the doily at the left to the back of the dessert plate. The dessert was a rich fudge cake, which would have soiled the doily miserably. Is it correct to let a doily take the place of a plate which matches the finger bowl and which stands on top of the dessert plate usually without any doily between them?

Answer: I don't think I understand your question. I don't see how the cake could possibly come in contact with the doily. Doilies are not often used, but when they are, you pick yours up with the finger bowl and put both down together on the tablecloth where there is space. Then you whatever the dessert may be is put on the plate. You certainly would not put food on the doily, ever! — By Emily Post, 1934

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

The Etiquette of Final Courses

The savory cheese swallowed in small morsels, and the sweet fruits, which strongly stimulate the nerves of taste, or nuts which require considerable mastication, cause an abundant flow of blood to the nerve centers…

Why Dessert, Cheese and Fruits End Meals

A writer in the Medical and Surgical Reporter explains the philosophy of taking bread, cheese and dessert at the end of dinner. He says that in order to supply abundant gastric juice for the digestion of the food introduced into it, the stomach requires an abundant supply of blood, and the nervous system must be kept active in order to respond to demands made upon it. 

The savory cheese swallowed in small morsels, and the sweet fruits, which strongly stimulate the nerves of taste, or nuts which require considerable mastication, cause an abundant flow of blood to the nerve centers; while the frequent movements of swallowing stimulate the heart and increase the rapidity of general circulation.— Good Housekeeping, 1885

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia