What Did Emily Say?!?

Ten years after her 1922, “Blue Book of Etiquette” was published, Emily Post had a radio program. As I build my Etiquette Museum, I have been acquiring all sorts of things to share with visitors. I purchased several original transcripts of her radio program and will be sharing some of them here on the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia. This below is one of many. It is from 1932.

What  EMILY POST said 

on the 

Du Pont Cellophane Radio Program

WJZ and NBC NETWORK                                            10.45 Α.Μ. E.S.T... 9.45 A.M. C.S.T.

11/22/32                      November 28, 1932

"GOOD TASTE" 

by EMILY POST

On this first morning I think I ought to give you some idea of the subjects that I mean to discuss at our meetings. First of all I shall probably talk about anything and everything that seems to me interesting because it seems to me that things that are interesting to me are likely to be interesting to you! But what I especially meant by saying that I wanted to make these gatherings friendly is that I shall try to explain frankly, as I would to any intimate friend, the reasons why we do this, or say that; why one thing is good form and another is not. I also want to note the modern changes not only in fashions, but in point of view. But at the same time I want to point out as we go along the principles underlying good taste that are unchangeable. By which I mean that best manners invariably spring not from rules of etiquette, but from kindness, which etiquette merely helps us to apply. 

And I am also going to talk about a subject that I myself love much, the personal appeal of a house, outside and in, upstairs and down. I've spent a great part of my own life trying to find out why one house or perhaps one room alone enchantingly invites us, why another says nothing to us at all, and I want to tell you what I've found out. It may sound formidable to suggest that we talk about the principles of classical beauty or of ethics or the ideals of culture, but as a matter of fact I want to talk about all of these and show that (to a practical degree at all events) they are not hard to understand. There are rules by which to measure beauty, just as there are rules for setting a table, speaking grammatically, or understanding the meaning of culture.

Speaking of culture reminds me of an advertisement I once read which said: "To eat an olive correctly, is to impress others as a person of culture." So I may as well add that this is not the sort of culture I have in mind. In fact, it is just this sort of olive-eating absurdity that has made the word etiquette lose all of its value. Rules of etiquette are not a lot of mumbo jumbo nonsense, learned by the few in order to make an impression on the many. The sole object of etiquette is to make the world a pleasant place to live in, to make contacts smooth, to oil the social machinery, and to point out to every human being in every civilized community, the ordinary principles of kindness and good taste.

 🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor of the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Incongruous Actions in Bad Taste

Not many days ago at a large military funeral the color bearer was chewing gum, and among those lined up on either side of the street to witness the impressive procession there were thousands who mentally commented on this little piece of bad taste.

“I wish you a little more taste.” — Alan Rene Le Sage

Lots of the little things we do that had better been left undone are not things that any authroity on so- called etiquette could reasonably call in bad form— but they are incongruous and inappropriate actions that possibly irritate other people just as much as actual breaks in etiquette. There are some people who though they have little opportunity to learn the habits of polite society through fortuitous gift of good taste, ever seem to make a break. And there are others, who though trained from their youth in the edicts of society, can never be counted on to avoid incongruities.

Not many days ago at a large military funeral the color bearer was chewing gum, and among those lined up on either side of the street to witness the impressive procession there were thousands who mentally commented on this little piece of bad taste. Now, as a matter of fact, so many Americans do chew gum on occasions that it can hardly be called a piece of bad manners. Aviators, swimmers, football player, soldiers on the march, mountain climbers for the most part, find great help in gum chewing, and some doubt the soldier who had a long march to take on a warm day with a heavy banner to carry reflected that he would lighten his task a ward off thirst if he went fortified with gum. But chewing gum on the gridiron or in the swimming tank 1s one thing and chewing gum on a solemn procession is another. It is one of the things of which a person with an, inherent sense of the fitness of things would, of course, never be guilty.

Americans as a rule have a rather remarkable endowment of this feeling for the fitness of things. Especially is this true of our women. A humble farmer's daughter can go from her rural home and grace the most formal European drawing room and show no less grace of manner than the Duchesses with whom she mingles. And many of the women who have made the most tactful hostesses of our White House and have been praised most lavishly by European visitors are those who have had no preparatory social training save that of some back-woods community and have come fortified simply with this native American sense of congruity.

To a certain extent this is something that one acquires as a natural endowment; but in a measure it can be acquired. If you would acquire it, then cultivate your powers of observation. Note what other people are doing and without, of course, blindly following them, bend your manners in minor matters to suit theirs. A desire to be distinctive and individual, at any cost almost always leads a person to lose his sense of the fitness of things. He consults only his own whims and personal comfort. He feels that he is relinquishing some of his inalienable rights as an American citizen if he yields his personal whim and habit. — By Mary Marshall Duffee, 1918

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Exacting Etiquette for Employment

“Amanuensis” – One who is an artistic or literary assistant. In particular one who can take dictation or copy manuscripts. – He should be a good penman, of agreeable address and genteel appearance, fond of composing, and apt at learning to write in cipher. He should have a smattering of French, and be familiar with the forms and etiquette of correspondence.

An Exacting Miss? Or a Hoax? 

If we are much mistaken the following advertisement for a nice young man, which appeared in the Cleaveland Plain Dealer, was rather a hoax:

A lady, temporarily obliged to lay aside the duties and pleasures of writing, wishes to engage the leisure hours of a young gentleman in the duties of an amanuensis. He should be a good penman, of agreeable address and genteel appearance, fond of composing, and apt at learning to write in cipher. He should have a smattering of French, and be familiar with the forms and etiquette of correspondence. When not employed in writing, he will be expected to read with good taste and expression, be fond of poetry and music — to converse with gayety and spirit, and be familiar with cribbage and back-gammon. The compensation will be handsome, and no person need apply who is not neat in dress, younger than thirty, and an enemy to tobacco, poor puns, and the conventionalities of society. Communications with specimens of style, etc., directed to 'H, box 566, Cleveland post office,' will be promptly answered by appointment of time and place of interview. – The Weekly Alta, 1869

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia  

Etiquette and Appropriate Attire

Will I be able to relax and behave with confidence, knowing that I've made a good selection?

Taste — Good, Bad and Indifferent

You've heard the term many times. As applied to fashion it means knowing and wearing those things that are right for the right occasion. What may be in good taste for the beach is probably not so for a shopping trip. What may look right on Sallie Mae not on you, and vice versa. How can you know that an outfit is or isn't in good taste for a certain occasion? Ask yourself:

• Will I feel comfortable physically, and psychologically, wearing this outfit on this occasion?
• Will I be able to relax and behave with confidence, knowing that I've made a good selection?
• Do I feel gaudy, overdressed or underdressed?
• Do I tug at my attire, or do I forget about it and enjoy myself? 

If you can answer yes to the first two questions and know to the last two, your outfit is probably in good taste.

Some Fashion Guidelines

• Keep current — you don't have to be fad happy. Just know what's going on out there in the fashion world. It's the only way you can pick and choose what's right for you.
• Know your strong points and emphasize them. Do you have a long Grecian neck, a wasp waist or shapely gams? Make the most of them! 
• Recognize your weak points, as well. Learn how to disguise them artfully with the illusion of color, fashion shaping and make up.
• Like and care for your clothes. Make good use of your trusty needle before that button falls off or that tiny tear becomes a major repair. Get to know your friendly neighborhood cleaning establishment and your "village cobbler." You'll look well groomed and you'll be surprised how your wardrobe has grown after the torn and soiled prodigals have been returned to the flock. — Wendy Ward Charm Book, 1972

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia