Belgravia and its Aristocratic Nurses

Two Victorian medicine or invalid spoons. The lower spoon is a ”half-teaspoon.”

Aristocratic Nurses... 

The Fashionable English Dames Learning to Be Practical in the Sickroom

This antique cup and pitcher in one, was for feeding invalids more easily.

Two or three years ago, the Prince and Princess of Wales distributed badges and prizes to a large number of professional nurses and afterward entertained them royally at Marlborough House. It was expected that fashionable dames would show their appreciation of the Royal example by taking up nursing as a recreation, but little was done until a few months ago, when the National Health Society opened classes for the benefit of the aristocracy, at which something more is taught than a coquettish arrangement of caps and aprons. 

The idea is to teach ladies the value of good nursing and enable them to learn something about fit food for invalids and how to give first assistance to the injured, in all of which, it seems, Duchesses, Countesses and the like, are lamentably deficient. The Duchess of Bedford is particularly active in the work. She has placed her fine house in Belgrave Square at the disposal of the society’s lectures on every Wednesday during the winter season, and as the course includes an afternoon tea, the attendance is expected to be large. 

The proceedings should certainly be interesting, as it is announced that each lecture “will be practically illustrated with a patient, bedding, etc...” The pioneer among the aristocracy of nursing and sanitation was Lady Brooke, who, with her husband, enjoys the particular friendship of the Prince of Wales. Her Ladyship has for years been accustomed to keep a sharp eye on the water supply and sanitary arrangements of the villages on her estates in the counties of Warwick and Sussex, often to the deep disgust of the cottagers, who claimed the inherent right of a Briton to please himself in such matters, and who objected strongly to being coerced into cleanliness on pain of eviction. Puritanical people have sometimes said hard things of Lady Brooke. It is right that credit should be given her in this matter. —London Letter, 1894

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia©️ Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and English Barristers

Etiquette holds that a barrister may not “tout” for retainers nor “hug” for business.

The barrister, Mr. Willis, who took dinner at the Judge's lodgings on Tuesday, gave me some interesting information concerning the relations the attorneys and barristers have toward one another. A barrister may not “tout” for retainers nor “hug” for business. If, on the circuit, he must not eat at the same table with the attorneys. If, he chances to stop at the same inn, his meals must be served in his own apartments; he must not ride in the same coach with a solicitor or attorney, nor smoke in the same room, nor bestow, nor receive any hospitality from him. 

It would be a gross breach of professional decorum for a barrister to waltz or dance with any member of a solicitor's family, for this would be a gross example of “hugging” for business. The phrase “briefless barrister” came to me with a meaning and emphasis that were new to me. After several years of circuit riding without a retainer, the young barrister is apt to conclude that he has missed his vocation, and he betakes himself to the colonies, or does newspaper, or magazine, or other literary work in London or the provinces. It has been stated recently, on what seemed to be good authority, that only about 10 percent the young men who are called to the bar, succeed in making their way.—Indianapolis Journal, 1894

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia  

British Military Etiquette Concerns

New recruits being fitted for their uniforms: WWI military etiquette did not permit officers and privates being seen together in public — even brothers taking their mum to a theater!

British

 Mother's Etiquette Problem

Wholesale enlistment in England is responsible for some Gilbertian situations. For instance, a woman writes to a newspaper to know what is the proper thing to do under the following curious circumstances: She has two sons in Lord Kitchener's army— one an officer, the other a private. On one occasion she wanted them to take her to a theater, but military etiquette does not permit officers and privates being seen together in public. 

Again, the brothers cannot meet their mother's guests at the dinner table for the same reason. Socially, when in mufti (civilian attire or "civies"), they rank alike, but nowadays uniforms are obligatory on all occasions. Hence the tangle. – Mariposa Gazette, 1915

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Will She Abdicate?

In her own sphere, Queen Victoria is despotic, and her decrees are not open to debate. That sphere is high-social life. She rules the aristocratic society or England with a rod of iron; and even her children are timid in her presence. Not even the friendship of the Prince of Wales could save Colonel Valentine Baker from her indignant wrath ; and a life spent in noble works could not atone, in her Majesty's eyes, for the breach of good taste committed by Miss Burdett Coatts in marrying young Ashmead.

Will Queen Victoria Abdicate?

The story that Queen Victoria is about to abdicate has been revived by the rumors of her bodily ailments. Those are naturally increasing with age, and as the Queen will be 71 on her next birthday in May, there is nothing surprising in their becoming more noticeable. But she comes of a long-lived family, and there is no present reason for expecting that she is in any danger from old age.

Of the fifteen children of George III, who himself lived to be 82, two, the Duke of Cumberland and Mary, Duchess of Gloucester; outlived their eightieth year. Six survived their seventieth, and two were well on toward their seventies when death overtook them. The Queen's father, the Duke of Kent, died at the comparatively early age 58. Considering the care which she has always taken of herself, the peacefulness of her reign, and the immunity from sorrow which she has enjoyed, she may well look forward to another decade of power. 

That she will abdicate in favor of her son is hardly to be expected. It does not run in that family to abdicate power. It was with the greatest difficulty that George III, when he was blind and mad as a hatter, was induced to consent to a Regency. George IV nearly provoked a revolution by his obstinate refusal to abdicate. 

In Queen Victoria's case, there is no likelihood of any pressure being exerted to induce her to resign the throne. Her fifty years' experience have educated her in the art of reigning without governing; popular government works smoothly, without the least friction. She accepts as her chief minister whomsoever Parliament chooses to select; and though, at critical times, she has insisted on being consulted on questions of foreign politics, and has gone so far— as in the Trent affair— as to modify a dispatch from the Foreign Office, yet still she has never actually joined issue with any minister, nor set her will in direct opposition to the will of Parliament.

In the Don Pacifico case, Lord Palmerston pursued a course which the Queen openly condemned and reprobated; but the minister insisted and the Queen yielded. In her own sphere, Queen Victoria is despotic, and her decrees are not open to debate. That sphere is high-social life. She rules the aristocratic society or England with a rod of iron; and even her children are timid in her presence. Not even the friendship of the Prince of Wales could save Colonel Valentine Baker from her indignant wrath ; and a life spent in noble works could not atone, in her Majesty's eyes, for the breach of good taste committed by Miss Burdett Coatts in marrying young Ashmead.

Her own life has been spotless, aggressively pure, so to speak; she insists on an equally immaculate record among those who surround her. In matters of etiquette, usage, heraldry, and even dress, she is well informed, and her word is law. Her mind has run to these topics instead of letters, or art or science. When Prince Albert lived, his powerful and many-sided mind exerted such a stress on her that she had opinions on books, music, modern science and even high polities; at his death she fell back into more congenial channels. 

She can tell, from memory, how many quarterings a German noble family can boast; but it is very doubtful whether she has any clear idea of the line of demarcation between State and Federal sovereignty in the United States, or whether she understands. the philosophy embodied in the "Origin of Species." If she is not in harmony with the strain of modern thought, the misfortune is rather due to her age than to her mental bent. She was a woman grown when the great reforms that made England what it is, were begun. She has probably never doubted that she is Queen of England by the grace of God. 

She has shown more than once that her idea of dealing with the working class is not to give them rights and votes and let them care for themselves, but to furnish the old men with soup and the old women with flannel petticoats and pet them both as inferior creatures who are deserving of pity. She never couid rise to the height of Gladstone's schemes for the elevation of the British subject into a citizen. But she was quite pleased with Disraeli's notion of creating her Empress of India. —San Francisco Call, 1890

Etiquette Enthusiast Maura J Graber is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Tea Table Etiquette

Patented design for a tea service in 1873

Quaint Customs Once Observed by British Dames

Tea drinking has become very fashionable among us of late years, almost as much as it was in England a century ago, but the prevailing customs at the table are different. The “teacup times of hood and hoop” had their own etiquette, of a sort not likely to be revived. What should we think now of a fashionable lady who cooled her tea with her breath? 

Yet Young says of a certain bewildering Lady Betty:
Her two red lips affected zephyrs blow
To cool the Bohea and inflame the beau.
While one white finger and a thumb conspire
To lift the cup and make the world admire.

Again a passage in contemporary literature shows that it was a lack of good manners to take much cream or sugar in one's tea. Says a lady of quality to her daughter: “I must further advise you, Harriet, not to heap such mountains of sugar into your tea, nor to pour such a deluge of cream in. People will certainly take you for the daughter of a dairymaid.” 

Pinky fingers should not be thrust out– A pinky finger held out and up in the air, was never a quaint English custom! ~ Not a real “Dame,” and not the “daughter of a dairymaid,” either, Etiquipedia doubts that the cross-dressing, comedian “Dame Edna,” is what the writer of this article had in mind. 

Certain other customs may be remembered in this country among us who had grandmothers trained in the ceremonies of a later day. One of them consisted in putting the spoon in the cup to show that no more tea was desired; another was that of turning over the cup in the saucer for the same purpose.

Etiquette also demanded that the tea should be tasted from the spoon, and that the hostess should then inquire, “Is your tea agreeable?” Certain scrupulous old ladies ask that now, and the question savors of a more sedate and gentle day than this. — From The St. Louis Republic, 1899

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and a "Woman Problem"

Was this a "Woman Problem" or in reality, a "Man Problem?"  In the 1890s, British women were more quiet and reserved in their etiquette and mannerisms, compared to their American counterparts, throughout all levels of society. Between the 1870s and the outbreak of World War One, more than 200 daughters of America's wealthiest families, went to Great Britain and Europe to exchange cash for a place in the British aristocracy and Europe's royal families. Finding many eligible young men who were the heirs to cash-strapped, large estates and titles, these marriages were rarely "love-matches," but America's young women with affluence, ingenuity, and a different set of manners, brought permanent changes to the English aristocracy and ruling classes of the day.

"The Woman Problem in England"

A superior and well educated class of young women in England, daughters of officers and clergymon, of professional men as well, are seeking employment in the London shops, where hours are shorter and wages are better than in the more genteel occupations of nursery governess and schoolteacher. 

One of these independent young women says she infinitely prefers the business work to the hopeless monotony of the village home life and the painfully patronizing attention of the squires. And indeed if titled ladies open tearooms and millinery establishments in town, why is the shop life dishonorable for those of lower rank? 

The problem of what to do with the daughters of Great Britain is hopelessly involved by the great excess of women over men in the population, by the tendency of the English bachelor to-wed with American beauty and gold and the petty conventionality which prescribes certain phases of work as unbecoming the dignity and rank of the daughters of impoverished country squires or clergymen in poor livings, professional men of small means and large families. 

— From the New York Sun, 1893

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor, for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Medaling in Etiquette for the Olympics

Staying out of hot water: The ‘Public bath pointing guidance manual’ includes important do's and don'ts for non-Japanese visiting public bathhouses in Tokyo.– Image from the Tokyo Sento Association

Cities which host the Olympics are becoming more and more savvy about the etiquette their citizens display when the world's spotlight is on them, and the etiquette of the foreign visitors arriving for the festivities. And Tokyo is no different:

Foreigners to get info on ‘sento’ etiquette ahead of the 2020 Olympic Games in Tokyo

Tokyo’s “sento” public bathhouses are making an effort to become foreigner-friendly by printing multilingual brochures and posters to explain Japan’s communal bathing etiquette ahead of the Tokyo Olympics in 2020. 

“We know some foreign travelers have shown interest in the bathhouses as a unique aspect of Japanese culture,” Katsutoshi Kuromasa, a section chief at the Tokyo Sento Association, said Friday. He added that member bathhouse operators in popular tourist spots like Asakusa in Taito Ward have recently seen more foreigners trying out the mass baths. 

“We expect an increase in the number of travelers and those who would like to bathe at bathhouses as the Olympic Games come to Tokyo in 2020,” said Kuromasa, who expressed hope the brochures and posters will help foreigners learn more about the cultural experience. 

Written in Japanese, English, Korean and Chinese, the recently published pamphlet explains the history of public baths and communal bathing in Japan. 

The posters, which are to be put up in all of Tokyo’s public baths from mid-October, outline all the steps, from taking off one’s shoes before entering the facility and paying the fee to making sure one washes thoroughly before taking a soak. 

The association has also distributed a pointing-based manual to all public bathhouses in the capital that helps staff communicate with foreign guests who can’t speak Japanese by simply pointing at the desired questions and responses in the manual. 

A total of 20,000 brochures will be provided for free from mid-October at public baths and the three Tokyo Tourist Information Centers, at Tokyo City Hall in Shinjuku Ward, Haneda airport in Ota Ward and Keisei Ueno Station in Taito Ward. 

Public bathhouses served as community gathering places in the past, but their numbers have fallen over recent decades as more dwellings include their own bathing facilities. As of the end of September, Tokyo had 710 public bathhouses, according to the association. The bathing fee in Tokyo is ¥450 for those 12 and older, ¥180 for those 6 to 11, and ¥80 for children under 5.

Tokyo is hardly the first city to go to such measures.  Most cities want to put their best foot forward in welcoming their guests.  Notably, China started early etiquette classes for their citizens, prior to the 2008 Olympic Games.

My etiquette class students were terribly confused by this idea: “Imagine,” I said to them, “If suddenly you, and your whole family, were instructed by the government to go to the shopping center or mall, on the 11th of every month, to practice standing in line politely. Would your family go?”

  

This seemed much more “doable” to me.  Classes in etiquette are always a good idea for that added bit of polish, and one doesn't have to stand in line for an hour or so.

I'm onboard with, “It’s civilised to queue, it’s glorious to be polite.” But “Hundreds of people gave clenched fists salutes to pledge their allegiance to the campaign ...?” sounds a like a scene right out of one of the History Channel's specials on Germany in the 1930s and early 1940s. 

London moved in the opposite direction of China, by handing out some rather stereotypical sounding etiquette advice to their citizens on the foreigners who'd be invading their city, for the 2012 Olympic Games: "Hold off from hugging an Indian, don't be alarmed if the French are rude and never mistake a Canadian for an American"? 

What if it is a Canadian of Indian descent, who has moved to the U.S.? Or what if a person is someone like myself? I don't particularly like being hugged by complete strangers but am not Indian. I am also alarmed by utter rudeness, will always hesitate to be rude, but I often do get mistaken for a Canadian. I am from a city in the U.S. founded by Canadians, which is why my mail often winds up in Ontario Canada, instead of Ontario California.

Britain's national tourism office published a guide to international etiquette ahead of the London 2012 games. Advice to Londoners includes, “Indians don't like being touched by strangers and may be suspicious about the quality of British food.mHold off from hugging an Indian, don't be alarmed if the French are rude and never mistake a Canadian for an American.”

Britain's national tourism agency issued guidelines Wednesday on the etiquette of dealing with the hundreds of thousands of foreign visitors who will be coming to London for the 2012 Summer Olympics.

Seeking to help the country's sometimes snarky citizens offer a warmer welcome, VisitBritain has updated its advice for anyone likely to work with travelers arriving from overseas — from hotel staff to taxi drivers.

Other tips: Don't go around asking Brazilians personal questions and never be bossy with visitors from the Middle East.

"Giving our foreign visitors a friendly welcome is absolutely vital to our economy," said Sandie Dawe, chief executive officer of the agency. "With hundreds of thousands of people thinking of coming to Britain in the run-up to the Olympic and Paralympic Games in 2012, this new advice is just one of the ways that VisitBritain is helping the tourism industry care for their customers."

About 30 million people visit Britain each year, spending about 16.6 billion pounds ($26 billion). The 2012 Olympics is likely to bring in an additional 2.1 billion ($3.3 billion) in tourism revenue, according to a government estimate, and about 320,000 extra visitors from overseas during the games in July and August 2012.

VisitBritain said research it had conducted found tourists believe Britons are honest and efficient — but not the most pleasant. Britain is ranked 14th out of 50 in the Anholt-GfK Roper Nation Brands Index on the quality of welcome offered to visitors, the tourism agency said. 

The frank etiquette tips were written by agency staff about their own native countries. Polish tourists are likely to be hurt by stereotypes that imply they drink excessively, while the French are notoriously picky in restaurants, the guidelines claim.

U.K. workers are told to brush off common Argentine jokes about a person's clothing or weight. Belgians take offense at people snapping their fingers while Australians are fond of coarse language.

Japanese people consider prolonged eye contact impolite and smile to express a range of emotions — not simply to show happiness.

Tourism workers are advised to show extra patience when dealing with guests from India or the United Arab Emirates.
“Indians are in general, an impatient lot, and like to be quickly attended to,” the guidelines claim. “The more affluent they are, the more demanding and brusque they tend to be.” 

Indians also don't like being touched by strangers and may be suspicious about the quality of British food, the guide said, without noting the latter might be a common concern.

Travelers from the Middle East are likely to be demanding with staff and “are not used to being told what they can't do,” the guide warns.

Guests from China and Hong Kong may find winking or pointing with an index finger rude, while “mentioning failure, poverty or death risks offense,” the advice claims. Chinese visitors may be unimpressed by landmarks just a few hundred years old, tourism staff are told. 

Workers are advised against discussing poverty, immigration, earthquakes or the Mexican-American war with visitors from Mexico — who prefer to chat about history and art.

Canadian tourists are likely to be quite annoyed about being mistaken for Americans, the guide suggests — urging workers to keep an eye out for maple leaf pins or badges on tourists' clothing.

And Americans? They can appear “informal to the point of being very direct or even rude” and won't ever hesitate about complaining, the guide says.

Compiled by contributor and Etiquipedia Site Editor, Maura J  Graber, who has been teaching etiquette to children, teens and adults, and training new etiquette instructors, for nearly a quarter of a century, as founder and director of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette.  She is also a writer, has been featured in countless newspapers, magazines and television shows and was an on-air contributor to PBS in Southern California for 15 years. 

Original articles from TIME Magazine, the BBC News, and Sento Etiquette from The Japan Times, by Masaaki Kameda 

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiqutette Encyclopedia

Etiquette for the London Underground

Britain is a place revered for the high regard its people place on etiquette, and indeed, the preservation of reserve even in the most stressful of situations. The London Underground is just one such place which accommodates this idiosyncrasy, with its own set of behavioural rules for the troglodytes who choose to utilise it as their main form of transport to get to and from their place of work.

It is, in short, still the best way to get around the labyrinthine streets of London Town, and a visitor may be confused about how one is to behave correctly without sounds of contempt emanating from fellow travelers.

So here is a guide on how one is to behave when entering the subterranean world of the London Underground.

Asking for Directions

Make sure that they are not questions which you can answer easily yourself: for instance, direction of travel. Looking at the London Underground map, if you have to go westbound, then the direction of travel is going to the left of the Tube schematic. If you have to go eastbound, then you go right. Northbound equals up, southbound - well, you work it out.

There is one major exception to this simple directional tool, and that is the Circle Line - where being a circle, there is no real direction at all. Confusingly, it has westbound and eastbound direction, as opposed to the more logical clockwise and anticlockwise direction.

If you must ask questions, then do so in good time. There is nothing more irritating to the well-seasoned commuter than to say - 'have we just passed [enter station name here]?', just as the train departs from it. Staff and commuters will be helpful alike when devising suitable travel plans. It is important to remember to say 'please' and 'thank you' after the question and its answer respectively.

Buying a Ticket

Ensure that you establish which ticket to purchase. This can be facilitated by deciding which is suited to your journey. The multitudinous types of tickets which can be procured from the ticket office, or indeed, the ticket machines, are not described here, as they are described very well at Transport for London.

The point here is that speed is of the essence. The faster you can buy your ticket, the less the people have to wait behind you. Have your change ready as well. This will speed you through the machine, or indeed, past the man giving you the ticket.

Don't hold your ticket next to magnetic things, such as handbag clasps, or mobile phones. This will wipe the magnetic strip, rendering it impossible to get through the barriers. Don't fold it either, as this will damage the strip, too.

The Ticket Barrier

Again, you must be prepared. Even before you get to the ticket barrier, have the ticket ready in your right hand, magnetic side face down. Form an orderly queue to the barrier, and when you reach it, slide the ticket into the panel facing you. The barrier will then suck it in, and it will pop it out at the top. If there are no problems with the magnetic strip, then as you remove your ticket from the top, you may pass - but do so quickly. This again, ensures that the people behind you get through quicker.

If there is a problem with your ticket because of one or more of the reasons outlined in the previous section, then the barrier will not let you through. Instead, it will beep loudly, and a red sign will flash up saying 'Seek Assistance'. if this happens, then go to a member of London Underground staff, who will then establish the nature of the problem. Do not on any account:

• Put the ticket through again.
• Force your way through the barrier.
• Go through the opening barrier if the person behind you has already inserted their ticket, thus leaving them stranded on the wrong side of the barrier.
• Putting your ticket through the barrier again will only result in the same thing happening, holding up more passengers queuing behind you. Forcing your way through will hurt.

Walking to the Platform

Assume a brisk pace, with determination and vigour. This again, will not lead to hold-ups behind you. If you must stop, then first take a glance behind you to assess the flow of walkers, and gently ease your way toward the side, and stop in a gentle and controlled fashion. Stopping suddenly can lead to injury; either by a fellow traveller bumping into you because they have not anticipated your sudden drop in speed as they walk, or by some very hot coffee from a fellow traveller, also walking just as fast and not anticipating your sudden drop in speed...

Escalators

You know you've been in London for too long when you automatically stand to the right on an escalator.
- Anonymous

If you are going to walk up an escalator, do so at a similar brisk pace, on the left-hand side of the escalator. If you choose to stand, make sure that you always stand to the right-hand side, and try to take up as little space as possible, without touching anyone. Do not in any circumstances obstruct the left-hand side with clumsy posture, bags, suitcases, children or loved ones.

If you wish to move from the stationary right-hand side to the moving left-hand side, then look behind you for a suitable gap between ascending passengers, manoeuvre quickly into it without contact with your fellow travellers, and assume the brisk pace outlined before. Once the brisk pace is assumed, you should not stop just in front of the bottom or top of escalators. This will result in exactly the same injuries as with stopping suddenly when walking to the platform. Find a safe space to stop, and manoeuvre yourself toward it safely.

Use the correct escalator for the direction of travel. In other words, if you wish to ascend, use the up escalator. If you wish to descend, use the down escalator.
Entertainment

A question asked again and again is on the issue of buskers. Should one refrain from giving money to an unlicensed individual/persons as they are breaking London Underground rules, or instead reward them for having the gall to entertain the commuting moles in their dreary and featureless trek deep under the capital city, and the admirable guile to avoid being caught?

The answer to this is of course, 'only if they are good'. Hence the person who can sing in tune, play in tune, improvise a fair bit and knows the bowels of London well enough to pick out the areas with the best acoustics will certainly have a fine nose for places and an ear for a tune.

Two places with particularly good acoustics include the bottom of the second set of escalators as you descend to the Piccadilly Line at Piccadilly Circus for the jazz and Beatles aficionados, and about a third of the way down what has been named 'The Tunnel of Hell' for violin solos.

Then there is the question - 'how much?' indeed, how much you feel is necessary for the quality of the performance. For tourists, this may be a very good method of getting rid of all those brown coins which the travel agents or the bureaux de change will not accept.

Licensed sites are usually occupied by buskers deemed to have some musical talent - as decided by London Underground.  (However, this can be waived if you are a student collecting money for charity, and wish to provide valuable entertainment for the sullen faces that pass by.)

Beggars

Begging is not permitted anywhere on London Underground property.
- A sign which is often ignored on the London Underground

Then there is the more difficult issue of beggars. It has been argued that the money that is collected from the public by them is used primarily for the purchase of alcohol and/or to sustain their addiction to illegal substances. However, whether this is true or not, to have no home, money or indeed security must be at the least depressing, and it is unsurprising that some do turn to such avenues as a form of escape.

As a result, if you give money to a beggar, some disparaging looks may be carefully directed at you from fellow passengers. You could then not give beggars money. However, you may feel guilty at this course of action. A suitable alternative would be to give them some food. The other slice of that sandwich which you don't feel like eating, or the mini-tube of stacking crisps which you really didn't want to eat could be given to someone else who would appreciate the gift in more ways than you could imagine.

The Platform

 

General Rules

• Understandably, people do not wish to travel too far, so there is a tendency for passengers to build up just in and around the entrances to the platforms. To prevent this from occurring, utilise your walking skills and use the entire length of the platform - again, with the brisk pace as described before.
• No flash photography.
• A friend of mine snapped a shot of an incoming train, only to hear an announcement requesting that pathetic tourists refrain from popping flashbulbs in the eyes of the conductor while he's attempting to stop a train. Well, without the 'pathetic'. But whoever sits there spying on the platforms is quick on the uptake. There's nothing like that in NY.

For Overground Platforms

I apologise for the jerky stop, but someone opened their umbrella in front of the train... once again, I apologise...
- Eastbound Piccadilly Line driver, arriving at Acton Town

To say that it is a bit wet in Britain is akin to saying that the Sahara is a bit warm at midday. Hence you may find yourself on a platform with an umbrella. When the train pulls in, do not try to close your umbrella in front of the train driver as it pulls in. Not only will the driver not appreciate your umbrella-closing skills, neither will any of the passengers on the train, as he will have had to make a very jerky and uncomfortable stop.

Always have your mobile phone set to discreet. If it is ringing, answer it as quickly as possible. Then when you converse over the phone, be as quiet as you can. Then, after the conversation, set your phone to discreet. There is no need for that mistake to happen again. This also applies to being within the train on overground sections of track, where there is mobile phone reception.
Smoking

Don't. London Underground staff can see you smoke, as the following announcement demonstrates:


London Underground would like to remind our customers that smoking is not permitted anywhere on the station. And that includes you... yes you, the smug git in the red jacket at the end of the platform...
- A non-recorded announcement on the Eastbound platform of the District Line at South Kensington

On the Train

 

Eye Contact

If God had wanted us to make eye contact on the Tube, then why did he give us the Evening Standard?
- A writer for the Evening Standard

Unless you have a significant other to make eye contact with, or indeed, relatives and suchlike, eye contact is a London Underground etiquette no-no. On no account does a person make eye contact with another passenger on the Underground, in any circumstance, even accidentally.

Physical Contact

Off-Peak Period - As for eye contact, unless you have a genuine reason for touching someone, refrain from doing so. When choosing seats, don't sit right next to the only person on the carriage. Instead, sit at the other end and surround yourself with the tranquillity of emptiness.


Peak Period - If you have a seat, and find that someone requires it more than yourself - ie... they have lots of baggage, the elderly, pregnant women, young children or anyone who appears to have had an unfortunate day, then give up your seat to them. This is instant kudos, not only to the person to whom you gave up your seat, but also to yourself.


If you wish to sit with your legs open, ensure that your legs form an angle between them of no greater than 10° .


When waiting, or when the train is arriving at the platform, always stand behind the yellow line. Train drivers have enough to cope with without worrying that someone is going to lose their balance and fall at an inopportune moment. Trains push air in front of them as they travel, and it can sometimes be enough to catch out the unwary.


Once the train is traveling past you, try not to edge forward in an effort to be the first onto the train. This can still be dangerous, and this traveler has seen bags and cases hit by the train as people surge forward.


Once the train has stopped, the doors will open. This is not the sign to pile onto the train. Others will be wanting to get off, and it is much easier to board a train with fewer people on it. It will also avoid 'buffeting' as people have to force themselves out against the incoming tide. If you make a mistake and step on too early, then don't be afraid to step back down again. You won't get left behind.


While waiting for passengers to disembark, stand back from the door. Stand to the sides, don't stand in front leaving one step clear in front of the doors, as this means that people will have to push past. If you can, stand to the side away from the exit, so people are getting off the train and turning away from you. This is the side of least resistance, but does mean you need to know your area.


Once all the passengers are off, then board. Move as far into the carriage as you can. Don't hover round the door because that's the exit you want further down the line. Move down between the seats if you can, as there will be more room there, and less chance that if the train gets really packed you will end up crushed. There's also the best chance of getting a seat if someone leaves. If this is not possible, then still move as far in as you can. You may find yourself getting more intimate with complete strangers than you may ever have done before. There is no other helpful advice here other than to just hope it will end soon, and not to complain - no one else does.


Stand well clear of the doors so that the train can depart. If you don't, this will incite loud sounds of contempt from the driver and other London Underground staff, such as:


Look, if you don't stand clear, none of us are going home!
- Piccadilly Line driver, afternoon rush-hour


To the man in the grey coat: what part of 'Stand clear of the doors' don't you understand?
- London Underground staff, South Kensington station, Piccadilly Line Westbound platform at morning rush-hour

Verbal Contact

Unless it is to ask the way, to ask for a newspaper which someone has read, to say 'excuse me!' to get to the Tube doors, or the persons with whom you wish to converse fall into the categories outlined in the past two sections, under no circumstances are you to engage in conversation with anyone on the Tube.

If you are by the door when the train stops and don't want to get off but are in the way of disembarking passengers, do step out. In all cases, the waiting passengers will allow you space and you will be the first back on the train. People will get a warm feeling when they think about your kindness.

Facial Expression

None, save for looking sullen, downcast, and generally depressed. Smiling should not occur, as it is generally seen that there is no valid reason for any positive emotion to be expressed while using this means of public transport. If any emotion is to be expressed, then it is usually in response to an announcement along the lines of:


I'm sorry for the delay, but we're being kept here for a couple more minutes to let the Rayners Lane train go first - why they couldn't have let us go first as we got here before them, I don't know... but anyway, sorry for the delay...
- Eastbound Heathrow branch Piccadilly Line driver, on approach to Acton Town, morning rush-hour

Even in response to an announcement like that, one should not exclaim vocally. To make known your disquiet, affect a slight grimace, wrinkling your brow very slightly, roll your eyes, or sigh very gently.

Sounds of Silence

If you are listening to music, make sure it is very quiet. You may be listening to a whole range of vocals, swirling woodwind, swelling strings and phat bass, but the rest will only hear something along the lines of 'tch thc cth thc thc'. The same goes for talking. Despite the ambient train noise being somewhat less than ambient, shouting will only add to the cacophony. The best thing to do may be to take a crash course in lip-reading or sign language.

Scents

Make sure you don't eat smelly food on the train. Despite having signs for 'Ventilation', the train carriage is essentially an enclosed space. Hence any strong smelling foods will diffuse through the air quickly. The same is true of very strong perfume, aftershave or flatulence.

Make sure you are wearing a good antiperspirant and deodorant as well. If you are unlucky enough to travel at peak times of the day, there will be a high probability of your good self traveling with someone's face in your armpit, or indeed, the converse. So to facilitate good Tube relations, be scentless in all ways.

Reading Material

Books - Considering delays, a nice big book may be suitable - at the time of writing, popular titles observed on the Tube include The Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Revision material in cue-card form can also provide excellent exam preparation for those long journeys.

This helps in avoiding eye contact with your fellow travelers.

Newspapers - London has three free newspapers called The Metro, London Lite, and The London Paper, which are akin to a thin tabloid. They have the advantage of being quite small, so that your elbows aren't occupying more space than is necessary to read the paper. The same goes for other tabloids. Just ensure that you keep your elbows down as much as possible.

If you are a broadsheet reader, then it becomes more difficult. The paper that it is printed on covers a greater area, thus you may find yourself taking up a great deal more space. To avoid this, fold the paper lengthways so you end up with a very narrow newspaper. Then as you finish reading the columns on the front page, turn it over. When you effectively finish reading the front, turn the page so that the first columns are where the first columns on the front page were, while maintaining its narrow format. Continue through the paper until read. Or just choose a 'compact' broadsheet.

As with books, both types of newspaper are also incredibly useful in ensuring that you don't make eye contact with anyone else on the train.

When you have finished reading your paper, it is customary to leave it in an area where other passengers may also pick it up to read it. On the Tube, this can be in the space between the back of the seat and the window, or on a spare seat. However, this leads to the issue of disposal at the end of the day, so it is usually better to take the paper with you, and share it with colleagues, fellow students, or your child's playgroup. If someone asks for your paper when you have finished with it, then give it to him or her. This is a common occurrence among Tube travelers.

Do not covet thy neighbour's newspaper - don't read over fellow-travelers' shoulders. Not only is it impolite, it's also just downright annoying.

Computers - Size matters, and so small is best. A laptop can be regarded as a maximum in size, and PDAs are commonly seen around the Tube. For games, ensure that you have set the volume to mute.

Rubbish

If you have some wrappers or other similar unwanted products or items, keep them with you until you get to a bin. Do not ask if there are any bins on the Tube - there aren't any.  (There is a very good reason for this, and that is to prevent people from planting explosives.)

Baggage

If you are carrying a backpack, take it off your back prior to entering the carriage and place it on the floor adjacent to your feet. This will also ensure that you don't take up more space than is deemed necessary. The same applies to shoulder-bags.

If you have several pieces of luggage, then place them in the spaces allotted. Do not let them accumulate at the doors.

Falling Asleep

Acceptable, as long as you do not snore, flop over on a fellow passenger's lap, or take up more than one seat. As no one speaks on the Tube, make sure you keep your ears peeled for your stop, for no one will tell you that the train has terminated.

Generic Advice

If the Train is Full - let people off the train first and move right down inside the carriage and, as they say, use all available doors. This will enable more passengers to get on, hence facilitating everyone's journey.


If the Train is Ridiculously Full - wait for the next train to arrive - don't add to the crush; these are people, not sardines. The next train should only be a few minutes.


If You Need the Toilet When on the Tube Train - cross your legs and hope for the best. Do not complain, do not show it; just bite your tongue and bear it. Toilets at Tube stations are few and far between; most of them are on the new section of the Jubilee Line.


If Someone Obviously Needs Help - such as with a multitude of heavy bags down several unforgiving flights of stairs, or indeed a particularly stubborn bottle-cap, then help them with their burden, don't stare at them as they struggle.


If You Have Waited for over 30 Minutes - you have in all probability, accidentally walked into a Circle Line station.

There are three options:

• Take a cab
• Take the day off/give up getting to your destination
• Walk

Originally published on http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/place-london/plain/A688232

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia