A Duke’s Respect of Court Etiquette

The Duke and the Queen seem always to have been on very affectionate terms, perhaps because he took her part in the controversy about the Prince’s position. “Let the Queen put the Prince where she likes,” he said, " and settle it herself; that is the best way.” An anecdote is told which shows that the Duke had not much respect for the traditions of Court etiquette when they conflicted with the dictates of common sense. 
– Photo source of the Duke and the Queen from the tv series “Victoria”, Pinterest

In 1845 the Queen and Prince Albert visited the Duke of Wellington at Strathfieldsaye. “The Duke,” writes Mr. Anson, the Prince's secretary, “takes the Queen in to dinner and sits by her Majesty, and after dinner gets up and says, ‘With your Majesty's permission, I give the health of her Majesty,’ and then the same for the Prince. They then adjourn to the library, and the Duke sits on the sofa by the Queen for the rest of the evening until 11 o’clock, the Prince and the gentlemen being scattered about in the library or the billiard room, which opens into it.”

Mr. Anson also writes that the Duke, under provocation from certain too curious impertinents, had put up a large notice in the grounds directing the people who wished to see the house to drive up to the hall door and ring the bell, but that they were to abstain from walking on the flag-stones and looking in at the windows. To an application from a newspaper for particulars of the Royal visit, the Duke replied: “F. M. the Duke of Wellington presents his compliments to Mr._________ and begs to say he does not see what his house at Strathfield Saye has to do with the public press.”

The Duke and the Queen seem always to have been on very affectionate terms, perhaps because he took her part in the controversy about the Prince’s position. “Let the Queen put the Prince where she likes,” he said, " and settle it herself; that is the best way.” An anecdote is told which shows that the Duke had not much respect for the traditions of Court etiquette when they conflicted with the dictates of common sense. The late Lord Albemarle, when Master of the Horse, was very sensitive about his right in that capacity to sit in the sovereign's carriage on state occasions. “The Queen,” said the Duke, when asked his opinion, “can make Lord Albemarle sit on top of the coach, under the coach, behind the coach, or wherever else her Majesty pleases.” – The New York Times, 1874

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette of Queens, Kings and Dukes

“The son of Waterloo” – The Duke of Wellington (or Weggington) as caricatured in Vanity Fair, June 1872

On one occasion Queen Victoria, Louis Philippe and the Duke of Wellington paid a visit, to Eton college. They were invited to sign the visitor’s book. The French King thoughtlessly took up the pen and signed his name at the top of the page. Etiquette, however, forbade Queen Victoria to sign her name under, any other. She therefore signed on the top of the next page. She then took up the pen and handed it to the Duke of Wellington, who was so excited at the contretemps that he actually signed his name “Weggington.” And, by the way, it may be recorded that etiquette forbids the Queen to converse with tradesmen. When a purveyor waits upon her, the Queen addresses her remarks to an equerry, who in turn, addresses the expectant merchant.—Philadelphia Times, 1896

👑Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the  Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Queen Victoria's Court Etiquette

“The son of Waterloo” – The Duke of Wellington as caricatured in Vanity Fair, June 1872

The Queen, the Duke, and the Crown

True politeness has been variously defined. One little boy said it meant “making everybody feel satisfied,” and another, that it was “doing the kindest thing in the kindest way.” I think good Queen Victoria understood and practiced it too, when she spoke so kindly to the old Duke of Wellington at the time the crown fell from his hands.

It was on some grand occasion—perhaps the opening of Parliament—and the whole Court was in attendance. The Duke, then quite an old man, carried the crown on the little cushion used for the purpose, when, backing out, according to Court etiquette, he forgot the little step at the foot of the throne, stumbled, and in attempting to regain his foothold, dropped the massive crown from his hands. It came with great violence to the floor, and rolled quite across the hall, badly bruising the diadem, and scattering the costly jewels in every direction.

The old Duke, accomplished courtier as he was, stood for a moment, aghast at the injury inflicted on so precious an article, and then would have stooped to gather up the scattered jewels. But the Queen saw in an instant his evident distress, as well as embarrassment, and rightly judged that he would prefer to be left alone. So, with the genuine kindness of heart and quick perception for which she is remarkable, she stepped gracefully forward, and, offering her hand to the venerable statesman, as if to assist him in rising, said, cordially, “I trust your grace is not hurt; and that you will wholly have recovered from the unpleasant shock by the morning.” Then, without a glance at crown or jewels, and apparently quite unaware of the casualty, she passed out, the Court following, and the Duke was left to recover his equanimity, and collect the scattered jewels at his leisure.

How grateful he must have felt for this graceful consideration on the part of his Sovereign : and how beautiful the model, not only of true politeness, but of genuine Christian forbearance, that we find in this little incident. It is by such acts of thoughtful kindness that England's gentle Queen has enthroned herself in the hearts of her subjects; and the tourist in England seldom hears the name of Victoria called by Prince or peasant, without being coupled with expressions of the highest veneration and warmest affection. – Christian Weekly, 1872

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia