Victorian Children’s Table Manners

“If in doubt at any time as to what is proper, follow the example of others of more experience.” Wise etiquette advice then, and just as wise advice now. 

Table Manners for Children

• Drink from the cup—never from the saucer
• Teaspoons are left in the saucer, not in the cup. 
• Making a noise, either in eating or drinking, is vulgar. 
• Always cheerfully defer to older people and to guests. 
• Eat slowly, and do not fill the mouth with large quantities. 
• Eat the food served or quietly leave it on the plate without remark. 
• Avoid drumming with the fingers or feet; it is the height of impoliteness. 
• If in doubt at any time as to what is proper, follow the example of others of more experience. 
• Patiently await the coming of your turn; do not follow with the eyes the food served to others. 
• Never unnecessarily handle the dishes, or in any other way exhibit nervousness or impatience. 
• Do not feel obliged to “clean up the plate;” especially do not make a laborious display of doing so. 
• Do not ask for any particular part of a fowl or similar dish, unless asked your preference; in that case always indicate some part, and if there really be no choice, designate the portion with which the host can most conveniently render service.— The Weekly Bouquet, 1898

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Dining vs Gobbling

There is a big difference between eating and dining. Eating ones food quickly, or gobbling ones food, causes much to be lost, not only in health, but in good manners and the companionship at the table. Dining is a way of leisurely savoring ones food, and enjoying ones company.

To eat fast is one of the bad habits of American people which we ought to avoid. If acquired in childhood, it will be hard to overcome, and will cause us much mortification when, later in life, we find ourselves with empty plates long before well-bred people in the company have finished theirs. 

Since we do not leave the table before others, there is nothing gained, even in time, while much is lost in health and in good manners. – From Edith E. Wiggin's 1884, “Lessons on Manners / For School and Home Use.”

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Moderator and Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia