Etiquette When Visiting Australia

Australian actor, Paul Hogan… “I'll slip an extra shrimp on the barbie for you” together with the ad’s byline “Come and Say G’day”. Both of these phrases were made famous not only worldwide, but also in Australia. — Pictures from www.nfsa.gov.au https://www.nfsa.gov.au/collection/item/shrimp-barbie-paul-hogan

One of the most famous advertisements encouraging people to travel to the ‘Land Down Under’ featured an Australian actor, Paul Hogan, made famous by the movie ‘Crocodile Dundee’. The Australian Tourism Commission, during the 80’s, coined a phrase which went viral, “I'll slip an extra shrimp on the barbie for you” together with the ad’s byline “Come and Say G’day”. Not only had both of these phrases been made famous worldwide, but also in Australia. We all said it at one time; it was really catchy.

Something I need you to know before you come to Australia….we actually don’t say shrimp! We say prawns. As this ad was targeting those Americans, the word prawn was exchanged. Australia is a unique country. When traveling, you will find each state is different and has its own history, attitudes, vibe and weather.

History of Australia

The Indigenous people of Australia, known as Aboriginals and Torres Strait Islanders, were the original custodians of the land, making their way from Southeast Asia. From the 17thcentury, Dutch navigators discovered land by sailing around the western and southern coasts, naming it New Holland. Lieutenant James Cook, in 1770, explored the east coast and declared it for Great Britain. Australia’s name came from the Portuguese term noted in 1606 by explorer Pedro Fernandes de Queirós, referring to the island of New Guinea and beyond as ‘La Austrialia del Espiritu Santo’. This term changed to ‘Terra Australis Incognita’ from the Latin for ‘Unknown South Land,’ and then in 1814 changed to Australia.

Due to mass overcrowding in prisons in Great Britain in 1788, Australia was used as a penal colony. As a result, those from England, Wales, Scotland and Ireland settled and dispossessed Aboriginals and Torres Strait Islanders and treated them as they previously treated those who lived in South America, India, and the Caribbean. Eventually, by 1901, Australia became the Commonwealth of Australia and became a federation of six self-governing states, after a resolution was passed in the British Parliament.

Today, Australia is a very multicultural country. Throughout history, Australia has needed the influx of migrants to help grow and expand the Australian economy and rugged land. Global conflicts, including both World Wars and the Vietnam War, caused major waves of immigration from Europe and Asia, and other international territories.

Australian Etiquette – Do’s and Don’ts

Informal greetings are appropriate in an Australian social setting, always use a person’s first name unless you are told otherwise. The most common verbal introduction is Hey, Hello or Hi. In-country and remote areas, some Australians will use slang such as G’day or G’day mate. In the city areas, you will hear introductions such as Hey, how are you? Your response should be, I’m good, thanks. How are you? This will help you break the ice. Commonly used greetings are handshakes, and a head nod is a standard greeting amongst men and some women. Australians do have an accent that is recognisable worldwide. The accent can change depending on the state they are from.

Making sure that your handshake is firm hand and eye contact is made. Australians love good eye contact. As Australia is multicultural, different physical greetings may be given, such as air kisses or hugs. Watch for cues from your group or individual. As a lead-in after the introductions, the state of the weather will be mentioned. Australians love traveling and new experiences, so a way of connecting is talking about the country you are working in or from.

Australians can speak in two ways, with diplomacy – “beat around the bush” or bluntly. “ They didn’t “beat around the bush”. As you have read, Australians do have their own language or ‘lingo’. Here are a few terms you need to know:

• ‘Cheers’ or ‘Ta’ – Thank you.
• ‘Good on ya’ – Well done or the opposite.
• ‘Yeah, nah’ – No thank you.
• ‘Yah reckon’ – Do you think so?
• ‘It’s my shout’ – I will pay for both of us.

Find more terms in this article: A Guide To Basic Australian Slang

Australians love those who are open to talk, good listeners, and take the initiative. Those who are unfamiliar with a group take the opportunity to introduce themselves. It is also assumed at an event that you will make the effort to speak to people and mingle. Australians love humour and love to laugh. The Australian humour can be described as witty, quick, dry, and sarcastic. Those who love to do this are often called a ‘larrikin’. Many Australians swear, and don’t be surprised if a word or three comes out while speaking.

Australian Dining Etiquette

Australia's food once heavily reflected the British style, which was meat and vegetables, until the 1950s. With the arrival of immigrants to Australia, notably after the Second World War, they brought their cuisines and beverage traditions, such as coffee-making, with them. See article: Millions have taken advantage and happily embrace multi-cultural and indigenous cuisines. Australians have adopted the British way of setting the table and using cutlery; however, over time, Australians have learnt to use chopsticks and to use the fork and spoon for Asian-type foods.

The Australian food that it's famous for is its BBQ. We love a barbecue, the taste that emanates from the cooking on an iron grill is like no other. For more information on the etiquette of being invited to a traditional Australian BBQ, read: Australian BBQ Etiquette.

I remember when I was travelling in Turin, Italy, and needing a caffeine fix, I found a café that was attached to Palazzo Reale di Torino. I spoke in English, the barista picked up that I was from Australia, and without me having to say anything, he asked, “Do you want a cappuccino, your style?” I was in awe…he knew what an Australian cappuccino was! I couldn’t stop smiling. Australians love coffee with extra milk. If you want to know more about café etiquette in Australia, please see this article: Australian Café Etiquette Tips.

So, does Australia do ‘tip’ at restaurants and cafes? The answer is no, generally. This is because Australian labour laws have made sure that hospitality workers are fully remunerated. Tipping is an optional extra. If you have had outstanding service and feel you want to reward the work of the individual(s), you can tip 5-10% of the total bill at a restaurant or café, drop a note or coins in the ‘tip jar’.

Australian Unique Food Etiquette

Australia also has a reputation for unusual and unique foods. Aussies love these sweet and savory dishes, which can be bought everywhere and freshly made in many restaurants and cafes.

The history of Tim Tams started in 1964, based on a British product called Penguin and named after a horse that won the Kentucky Derby in 1958. Today, it’s an Australian staple that you will find in most kitchen cupboards. You bite two opposite ends of the rectangular chocolate biscuit to suck up coffee through it, making it gooey and warm.

Vegemite was developed to re-create a local alternative to British Marmite using leftover brewer's yeast when imports were disrupted following World War I. Vegemite is used sparingly with lots of melted butter (not margarine) on hot, crispy toast bread for breakfast.

Pavlova was invented by Herbert Sachse in 1935. Working in the kitchen at the Esplanade Hotel in Perth created this delicious masterpiece after the Russian ballerina Anna Pavlova. The base is sugar and egg whites baked and cooled for cream to sit on top with fruits such as strawberries and sliced kiwifruit. The cake needs to be served lying flat on the plate, as you will not be able to eat it standing up.

ANZAC Biscuits were invented by Australian wives and women's groups around 1914 to 1915, to send to soldiers fighting abroad as they wouldn't spoil on long overseas voyages. Primarily made of rolled oats, flour, sugar, butter and golden syrup. Aussies love to eat this for morning tea with a cappuccino or tea.

Traveling Etiquette in Australia

What can you expect when traveling to Australia? What many forget is that, like Europe or the United States, Australia is so large that you need to take time to travel from state to state. You will be using airlines to get to places, as well as trains and buses. Australia’s love their ‘space’ and are used to wide and open areas and listening to nature. Understanding this, you should know that pushing and jostling to get on and off transport is discouraged, and speaking with the loudspeaker on is a huge no-no. Please also note that if you push into a queue or take yourself to the front of the queue, you will be promptly and firmly told to go back to your original place… very quickly. Another thing that is abhorrent is spitting in public or throwing rubbish. It is seen as rude and shocking. You can even get fined for throwing rubbish out of the car’s window.

Australian Flora and Fauna Etiquette

Flora and fauna are extremely important to Australians. Many, when describing home, will tell you about the beautiful trees, green lawns, nature walks in forests, and pristine beaches, however keenly aware of the dangers of the land. We have all learnt through school, family, and friends, to respect Australia’s biodiversity and ecosystems.

All of us grow up knowing that you cannot touch spiders, snakes, koalas, kangaroos, wallabies, quokkas, Tasmanian devils, swim with jellyfish, or pick up octopuses while casually strolling the beach, jump in lakes, or swim at beaches, especially in the north of Australia's Top End, due to the crocodiles. Yes, we are cautious and yet immune. If you find an injured, sick or orphaned native animal, such as kangaroos, wombats or koalas, as soon as possible, deliver them to an authorised wildlife shelter in the area.

Australian Beach Etiquette

All Australians have been to a beach and many take holidays to relax next to one of the 11,000+ beaches around the island. Here is what you need to know when claiming your spot on the sands with your friends and family.

• Be very cautious as to where you swim if you are not a strong swimmer. Not all beaches have the red and yellow flags set up on the beach to tell you that this is a ‘safe zone’ and patrolled by lifeguards. Australians grow up having swimming lessons in primary school year after year, foreigners who have not grown up with this culture need to be alert.

• There are designated areas for surfing, jet skiing, and boating. There have been many accidents, some fatal, when both are using the same area. Those who are catching fish, day or night, are allowed as “per council rules”. They are permitted to do so only away from swimming zones. 

• When you arrive at the beach, claim the sandy area that puts space between you and others. Australians hate being ‘jammed’ or close together. Playing ball or frisbee sports on a busy and packed beach is definitely not advised and you may be yelled at or spoken to by the lifeguards. If there are those in bikinis and thongs, it's rude to ‘gawk’ or stare. And be aware, it's illegal to take photos when permission is not sought. You must ask for permission to photograph anyone without their knowledge.

• Setting up a BBQ in the middle of the beach is awkward and annoying. You are cutting off the scenery and sun for many people and making it ‘hotter than hell’ so to speak. Councils will supply clean and fully gassed BBQs in grassed areas for people to use. If you are bringing your own cooker, set up and cook in those areas.

• Before bringing your favorite canine, always check if the beach is a zone for dogs, as they are not permitted on certain beaches. Avoid taking a dog off its leash, as there may be beach-goers who fear dogs. Yes, there are dog-friendly beaches where you can allow your dogs to roam about off the leash. Just check to make certain the beach you’re on is one of them.

• It is a ‘hard no’ to camping on any beach due to health and safety regulations. There are designated beachside campgrounds that are set up behind dunes or on the foreshore. Always check with local council, the national park or state forest for the laws and codes you need to abide by.

Australia is incredibly unique and beautiful, so travel to the “Land Down Under” and “Come and Say G’day”. We hope that you appreciate what our beautiful land has to offer, and that we see you soon. As Paul Hogan would say, “I’ll make sure to slip an extra shrimp on the barbie for you!”

Pictures from www.nfsa.gov.au https://www.nfsa.gov.au/collection/item/shrimp-barbie-paul-hogan

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette.

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette for the Busy Indian Day

Mornings often begin with preparing lunch for the family—commonly for children heading to school or a spouse heading to work.

Hectic Life in an Average Indian Home

Have you ever taken an evening stroll through your neighbourhood and found yourself wondering about the lives unfolding behind the windows and walls around you? While it may seem like an unusual thought, it sparks a deeper curiosity: what does a day in the life of the average Indian look like?

Living in India has given me a unique glimpse into everyday life, particularly the routines and dynamics within households. The following is what I observed:

Mornings often begin with preparing lunch for the family—commonly for children heading to school or a spouse heading to work. In many households, hired help is integral to daily life. Domestic workers, referred to locally as “maids,” are usually women, though it’s not uncommon to find young men taking up this role as their primary source of income.

The day for many homemakers and remote workers starts with letting in the maid and assigning the day’s tasks. This process struck me as quite different from Western practices. In India, a close eye is often kept on the maid’s work to ensure it meets expectations. For someone from the West, where the typical approach is to outline tasks and trust that they will be completed to a satisfactory standard without constant supervision, this can feel unfamiliar, even uncomfortable.

When I asked local friends about this practice, they explained that close supervision is seen as necessary to prevent shortcuts. Maids are often managing multiple houses and might be tempted to rush through their work to move on to the next. The sentiment shared was: “I don't play around with my money – I want to see it work for me.” While understandable, the process seems exhausting to me as an outsider.

If you’re visiting a friend’s apartment in Mumbai, be prepared for some common entry protocols. At the gate, the security guard will likely stop you, as unfamiliar faces are routinely checked. Be sure to have your host’s full name and apartment number handy. In some cases, you may be directed to the doorman, who might take your photo and collect your details for a security app. This ensures a smoother entry on future visits, as your information will be stored and verified.

In older buildings, you may need to climb stairs — less than ideal in Mumbai’s heat. In newer apartments, you’ll often encounter a double-door entry system: a folding gate followed by the main door. For the elevator to function, you must open and securely close both doors each time you enter or exit. A friendly heads-up: as you leave the apartment after a warm and welcoming visit, and enter the elevator, be prepared for a rush. You might find yourself navigating a flurry of activity, much like stepping off a Mumbai train, with residents eager to get home or maids hurrying between houses to finish their day.

What should you bring as a gift to your hosts house? I have found with trial and error that anything from overseas is perfect, such as chocolates, sweets in generous packaging, tea in a tin and, if you know the man of the house very well, a whiskey. In Mumbai and other states, if you want to bring alcohol to a hosts house and you know that they drink alcohol, as many do not, its best a man go to the shop’s front rather than a woman. As a foreigner, all eyes are on you, as you leave the apartment, on the street, on the bus as I found out one day. I got onto a bus on my usual route and the driver said he had not seen me awhile and I explained that I had moved apartments. Very observant of the driver!

Front doors in India are vibrant and often showcase the family’s name alongside symbols of faith and cultural identity. Hindu households may display torana or bandanwar (decorative hangings of marigolds or mango leaves for good luck), swastika or om symbols for blessings, or items like a kalash or gudi (traditional Maharashtrian flag) during festivals. Some Christian homes might feature a cross, while Muslim homes often have plaques with quranic inscriptions such as “bismillah-ir-rahman-ir-rahim” for blessings and protection. Additionally, some homes use black threads or amulets to ward off negative energies, reflecting a blend of religious and cultural traditions.

Upon removing your shoes and placing them by the door or on a shoe rack — rest assured, they’re unlikely to go missing —you’ll step inside barefoot and be warmly welcomed by your host and their family. Greetings often include a friendly namaste, with hands pressed together, accompanied by introductions to those present. While some Indians may offer a hug or a kiss, it’s best to mirror their approach if they don’t initiate such gestures. Your host will then guide you to take a seat on the sofa, making you feel right at home.

As you take a seat, you’ll be offered water on a tray. It’s a kind gesture rooted in an ancient tradition of hospitality, meant to refresh guests after their journey and set a welcoming tone. It’s polite to accept and appreciate this thoughtful offering. Afterward, the conversation typically begins with inquiries about your health and family, and it’s customary to reciprocate. 

You may be offered chai by your host after drinking water. Please don’t say ‘yes, I’ll have chai tea’, your host will have a wide smile and say ‘chai means tea’ and laugh. 

A compliment about your host’s home, family and work, is always a great way to keep the conversation flowing. Other ice-breakers are asking and knowing about the latest Bollywood movies, actors and actresses and asking who’s your favourite or what is it about the film you like the most? I don’t want to scare you… but you must be very prepared for the next to come… to be asked questions that would be relegated to the ‘no-go-zone’ in western countries such as ‘how much is your rent?’, ‘how much do you get teaching?’, ‘why don’t you have children?’, ‘how much is your house worth?’ and so it goes on. Being prepared is key.

Don’t be surprised if the men break off on a different couch or in a room completely, leaving the women to talk or walk off to the kitchen together. This is a common social dynamic in many Indian cultures, where gender roles and expectations can influence social interactions.

During your visit, you’ll notice the host managing various household tasks. If they have a full-time domestic helper, you might observe them providing instructions, often related to meal preparation. If the host is preparing the meal themselves, expect them to move in and out of the kitchen, with the dining set-up unfolding gradually, rather than being prearranged.

When it’s time to eat, be prepared for a generous serving of food, including a mountain of rice accompanied by roti, papad, and an array of curries. To enjoy the meal gracefully without overwhelming yourself, use the roti or papad to eat with the curries, and reserve the rice for lighter dishes like dal. To politely manage the over-abundance of rice, take small portions and express your appreciation for the delicious meal, emphasising its loving preparation while explaining that you have a small appetite. This approach shows gratitude while ensuring you don’t offend your host.

I didn’t mention this before, you may be offered chai by your host after drinking water. Please don’t say ‘yes, I’ll have chai tea’, your host will have a wide smile and say ‘chai means tea’ and laugh. After your meal you may be offered chai again. Just remember that chai is very sweet and, depending on your host, might be flavoured with a choice of green cardamom, ginger — a winning combination – or even pepper, which is not too bad.

Whilst you are back on the sofa, sipping and talking, with those from Maharashtra, I have found when there is disapproval, affirmation or correction on a subject you are talking about, they will click with their tongue to emphasise how they feel. It’s really an interesting thing that they do and after a while I started doing when speaking in Hindi or English.

Please note that unless you know your host well or you have very important work to do the next day, I mean if you are meeting the Prime Minister of India – an important day, to say the least – then your lunch and dinner meal will run very late and overtime. Have yourself a small snack before your enter uber or a rickshaw, that will fill the gurling in your stomach. A day after the event, it’s nice to say thank you and follow up with a text of pleasantries.

 

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette. Elizabeth is currently traveling throughout India and brushing up on her Hindi.

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Cambodian Etiquette, Culture, Customs

Travel blog sites and influencers will only fixate on the usual foods due to wartime measures and the experience that Ankor Wat brings to the intrepid traveller. However, what is missed is the beauty of the people. They miss the discovery of what it is like to be genuinely entertained by these warm and welcoming people.

While traveling through Cambodia, I found the people kind, caring and curious. It pleased me to see such bashfully happy, especially after the atrocities that occurred during the Khmer Rouge regime. I felt there was so much to learn in Cambodia, and I only touched the surface.

A bit of history: The Khmer Empire was once a mighty empire dominating Southeast Asia. It flourished from the 9th to the 15th centuries, ruled by a monarchy until its abolition from 1970 to 1993. Cambodia’s fortunes declined over centuries, becoming a French protectorate in the 19th century and gaining independence in 1953. It was called ‘The Paris of the East’, which ended with the start of the Vietnam War, quickly jumping to the horrors of the Khmer Rouge regime. In the 1990s, Cambodia eventually established itself as a constitutional monarchy and embarked on a slow recovery and development path.

Modern day Cambodia is quite welcoming. The traditional Cambodian greeting is the “Sompiah,” similar to the Indian namaste. To perform a “Sompiah,” place your palms together and bow your head slightly. To show more respect, the higher your hands are, the lower your bow. When greeting elders or those in a higher social or professional position, initiating the “Sompiah” is customary. When addressing elders, use honorific titles. “Lok” is used for men, and for women, “Lok Srey.”

Entertaining and food is an integral part of Cambodian culture… Allow the eldest person in the room to start the meal before you bite. Cambodians will use their chopsticks, fingers or a spoon and fork; the fork is used to push food onto the spoon. Leaving a small amount of food on your plate indicates satisfaction. Leaving the plate bare could say that you are still not satisfied!

Cambodians are known for their hospitality and friendliness. Entertaining and food is an integral part of Cambodian culture; before coming to a person’s house, guests should search for gifts like flowers, sweets, fruit, or dessert. Don’t be surprised if the host ignores your gift; it will be appreciated long after you get home. Upon entering the house, remove your shoes and be prepared to be escorted to the best place to sit.

When sitting down to eat, the soles of your feet should never be pointed at another person or rest on personal effects. Men may sit cross-legged, and woman will tuck their legs and feet to the side. Stretching your legs like you are performing yoga should be avoided as it will be seen as offensive. While you’re sitting whilst dining, you may find close friends and relatives often unannounced. Everyone will be offered water, tea or juice before a meal.

It’s advised as the guest to show politeness and try a little bit of everything offered, even if your stomach is churning. Wait for the host to invite you to eat and use your right hand to pick up food. The right hand (or both hands) passes or receives items. However, it is taboo to use only the left hand (I suspect that is the ‘toilet hand’). Allow the eldest person in the room to start the meal before you bite. Cambodians will use their chopsticks, fingers or a spoon and fork; the fork is used to push food onto the spoon. Leaving a small amount of food on your plate indicates satisfaction. Leaving the plate bare could say that you are still not satisfied!

I have found many travel blog sites and influencers will only fixate on the usual foods due to wartime measures and the experience that Ankor Wat brings to the intrepid traveller. However, what is missed is the beauty of the people. They miss the discovery of what it is like to be genuinely entertained by these warm and welcoming people.

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette. Elizabeth is currently traveling throughout India and brushing up on her Hindi.

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Japanese Etiquette Shines at World Cup

Etiquipedia feels it’s a sad commentary on sporting fans that every few years, news articles about the cleanliness of Japanese fans (and Japanese athletes in the locker rooms!) cleaning up their area of the stands, can cause such astonishment on social media. — “Japanese fans STILL clean up the stadium after their match despite the heartbreak of seeing their side lose 3-2 in the last minute” - Mail Online

In 2015, Online Magazine Tone Deaf printed these headlines “The Aftermath Of This Aussie Music Festival Last Weekend Is Revolting”. Why? Aussies failed in a big way to clean up their rubbish after weekend long festivals leaving the environment not as they found it. A significant contrast to the fans and players at the 2022 FIFA World Cup held in Qatar.

MailOnline wrote: “Japanese fans STILL clean up the stadium after their match despite the heartbreak of seeing their side lose 3-2 in the last minute”. It is simply amazing to see a country's people to be tidy, neat and clean and even after defeat. What propels this nation to be so environmentally conscience and stand out from the crowd?

It has been said that cleanliness in Japan was noted in historical texts pertaining to the government in the book called the Engishiki - Procedures of the Engi Era. A book written about 927 A.D. about the laws and customs that governed people of that time period. These volumized works spoke about religious practices, governance and regulations.

Generated over time came practices from palaces, Buddhist temples and Shinto shrines, and everyday households in December and January devoted to cleaning the house in readiness for the new year and the positive things it may bring. Noted observations from Sir Rutherford Alcock, the first British diplomatic representative to live in Japan, the son of the physician and himself a surgeon discovered whilst serving in Japan from 1858, that the Japanese favoured order and relished cleanliness. This would have tickled the diplomats fancy understanding a correlation between cleanliness and the body.

From childhood, the Japanese are trained at school age. They are not only taught that cleaning is essential but it is also practised in class as a daily routine. Children must clean, dust and pick up litter daily and weekly. The result is homes and businesses being kept clean. Not only are the children involved, but prefectures throughout Japan will have selected days for their citizens to do a clean-up day, not only to tidy up, but to act as a bonding experience for its residents. 

Homeowners, in the early mornings from 7 am onwards, will be seen brushing up leaves to keep the streets presentable, and at the end of a long hard day, a truckie's job is to wash down their truck meticulously, to be shine for the subsequent day of work ahead. 

 The Shinkansen, the name of the famous Japanese bullet train, has a specialised cleaning time called the TESSI. Their crack team can scrupulously clean and prep each train in seven minutes from start to finish. So, the Japanese are sticklers for cleanliness and order.

After Japan’s defeat to Belgium, media took snapshots of the Japanese fans consciously picking up discarded fan paraphernalia and food wrappers and placing them in a blue rubbish liners, cleaning the stadium, not even waiting for other fans to leave as they walked up and down the aisles. These snaps of fans cleaning before departing, naturally went viral to an astonished world of social media . Even though the Japanese soccer team lost, Japan can be proud of fans and players alike for their excellent attitude. — By Etiquipedia Contributor Elizabeth Soos

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette.

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Hungarian Business Etiquette

There is an old Hungarian saying:

“A zúrt nagykapu mellett, mindig van egy kiskapu”

Or...

“If the big gate is closed, there’s always a little gate open”

Hungarikum

This term is a combination of “Hungary,” or “Hungaria” and ‘‘unikum’’ meaning “unique.” Hungarians view themselves as citizens quite different from those of other European countries. It can refer to their food, family values, language, folk music, dancing, etiquette and respect. 

The Hungarian language – Magyer— is a unique language that stands under the umbrella of the Uralic language family. The closest known language to Hungarian is the Finnish. Many Hungarians mention this to show uniqueness and it is a source of pride. Hungarians are very respectful and etiquette oriented and will be very aware to show it and expect it to be returned.

Hungarian Names

Before knowing how to use Hungarian greetings it is wise to understand how Hungarians name themselves.

• Hungarians will use surname then first name: Kovács Erzsébet.
• Hungarians will introduce themselves using their surname first and then first name.
• Some married women may want to keep their maiden surname or take on their husbands or take on both names. The word: né is an indicator of marital status. Example: If a woman’s name is “Kovács Erzsébet” and her husband’s name is “Nagy Imre,” she may choose “Nagy Imrené” or she may choose “Kovácsné Nagy Erzsébet.”
• Children traditionally will take on the father’s surname. Hyphenated names are becoming more common than in the past.
• As a term of endearment between friends and family, names can be shortened. For example, men named “Zoltan,” will be called “Zoli.” Or women named “Erzsébet,” may be called “Erzi” as a shortened name.
•  Traditionally, Hungarians may have been named after a religious saint.

Hungarian Greetings 

• In the past, greetings have been gender and aged based.
• It’s best to wait until you are told how a person wants to be addressed, before addressing someone you are meeting.
• The older generation may bow to you.
• If you are known by someone and you have met several times, the person will then use your first name.
• A firm handshake and making eye contact is a suitable greeting.
• Friends and relatives will greet each other with a hug and kiss on each cheek, starting on the left side.
• Men will shake hands only if the women extends her hand first.
• Adults will greet children and teenagers by their first names.
• Children and teenagers will be told how to address an adult.
• During Soviet rule, many Hungarian honorifics were erased from social greetings.

How to Use Honorifics

Please look at the above table and the corresponding numbers to see how to use these Hungarian honorifics. Please note, not everyone will use these terms:

1. “Kovács úr Péter” (surname úr firstname)
2. “Kovács né asszony” (surname)
3. “Mária Kisasszony” (firstname)
4. “Kovács Erzsébet úrhölgy”
5. Kovács néni (using surname), Mária néni (using firstname)
6. Kovács bácsi (using surname), Péter bácsi (using firstname)
7. Kislány Kovács (using surname), Kislány Mária (using firstname)
8. Kisfiú Kovács (using surname), Kisfiú Péter (using first name)


Hungarian Communication

• Hungarian style of communication can be blunt, direct and controversial. To make a point, they will tell a story, use anecdotes with emotion and intensity, mainly to get you thinking. Replying straight after a statement is key, rather than holding back will avoid raising their suspicion.
• Even though Hungarians pride themselves on using etiquette, they will ask probing questions that may make you feel uncomfortable. It is best to have an answer. This will assist in creating trust and open the way for you to ask a tricky question back later.
• Embarrassing a Hungarian in public can be reprehensible on your part. This will lead to bad and lasting ill-feelings. If you feel the need to criticize leave it to a time when you both have privacy.
• Hungarians tend not to show physical affection in public however, this is slowly changing in modern Hungary. There will be differences in how genders display physical contact and based on how well they know each other.
• Personal space for a Hungarian is essential. Crowding them in or getting too close can make them feel uncomfortable.
• Eye contact is especially important. Not looking straight into the eyes of someone can trigger thoughts that the person is hiding something, and they will not pursue friendship or cut their conversation quickly.

Hungarian Business Etiquette 

Hungarians place value on the efforts that go into building business relationships. The efforts include you repeated correspondence, meeting up over time whether it be at a café, restaurantor cultural events, and on the understanding, it takes time and patience. Reciprocating the invitation is advisable, this will build trust and long-term business relationships. Being referred by a Hungarian counterpart is an excellent way to skip some of the beforementioned processes.

• Being on time is key for good social and business relationships to flourish. If you are delayed, immediately call and apologize. Give a reason for being late and promise to be there as soon as you can.
• Appointments should be made two weeks in advance.
• Constantly cancelling appointments will be a red flag to your Hungarian counterpart. Business may not proceed.
• Using titles has been particularly important to Hungarians. Not using someone’s title could mean you are not serious and show disrespect. Always check your previous correspondence and find out the name that your business counterpart prefers to use.
• Hungarians are better with face-to-face contact then through emails, phone calls, Zoom or Skype.
• Initially upon meeting use small talk to get the conversation and trust going. Wait for your business counterpart to steer the conversation. 
• Talking business straight away will concern your Hungarian counterpart. Building trust and showing sincerity is a better route to go. Pressuring business partner and being confrontational will put an end to all business relations.
• Hungarian businesses will have a hierarchical structure which they expect you will respect. 
• If you are wearing a jacket and want to take it off, wait to be invited.
• When there is an agenda, it is best to stay within the agenda, if there are any side topics that can be brought up at the end or at another time.
• Hungarians are incredibly detailed orientated and do not like surprises. When doing business, you need to be open and transparent. Allow for changes to contracts and open dialogue when doing business.
• In dealing with Hungarians in Hungary, during the summer months (July to mid-August), holidays period from mid-December to mid-January will difficult to schedule appointments, especially Friday afternoons.

Hungarian Business Greetings

• Hungarians are very conscious to call you by the name you want to be called by. If you have in your correspondence: Dr Margret Smith, you will be introduced as “Dr Smith Margret.”
• Finding out that you are a CEO or higher rank, you will be given the respect as they would treat you within a Hungarian company.
• If you hear a Hungarian telling you about their university degree upon meeting them, take interest in this and acknowledge the achievement. It is considered a great feat to go to university and pay for it’s fees. 
• If you are doing business within Hungary, its best to invest in a translated business card. One side should be in English or your country of origin and the other side, in Hungarian. Your card should include your surname first, and first name last and any degree abbreviations you have achieved.
• Many Hungarians will know a few languages, depending on the area they where born in and what they have learned in school. This could range from high and low German, French, Croatian, Serbian, Romanian or Russian.

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Hungarian Social and Dining Etiquette

In the 18th century café tables became smaller, la petite table or gueridon, allowing more people to fit in. In cafés, tables were made from marble with wrought iron legs, making the ideal shape for collaborations and comfortable communication. The middle-class coffee-houses had square tables with solid mahogany legs. Over time, many cafés removed walls to allow patrons to eat and drink coffee in gardens. They soon completed with many restaurants due to their expanding hot and cold menus. Coffee was always served in glasses and never cups, unless requested.— György Klösz, Cafe Reitter on Andrássy Avenue Opposite the Opera House (1896). Photograph source, Kiscell Collection, Budapest History Museum

Hungarikum

This term is a combination of “Hungary,” or “Hungaria” and ‘‘unikum’’ meaning “unique.” Hungarians view themselves as citizens quite different from those of other European countries. It can refer to their food, family values, language, folk music, dancing, etiquette and respect. 

The Hungarian language – Magyer— is a unique language that stands under the umbrella of the Uralic language family. The closest known language to Hungarian is the Finnish. Many Hungarians mention this to show uniqueness and it is a source of pride. Hungarians are very respectful and etiquette oriented and will be very aware to show it and expect it to be returned.

Hungarian Names

Before knowing how to use Hungarian greetings it is wise to understand how Hungarians name themselves.

• Hungarians will use surname then first name: Kovács Erzsébet.
• Hungarians will introduce themselves using their surname first and then first name.
• Some married women may want to keep their maiden surname or take on their husbands or take on both names. The word: né is an indicator of marital status. Example: If a woman’s name is “Kovács Erzsébet” and her husband’s name is “Nagy Imre,” she may choose “Nagy Imrené” or she may choose “Kovácsné Nagy Erzsébet.”
• Children traditionally will take on the father’s surname. Hyphenated names are becoming more common than in the past.
• As a term of endearment between friends and family, names can be shortened. For example, men named “Zoltan,” will be called “Zoli.” Or women named “Erzsébet,” may be called “Erzi” as a shortened name.
•  Traditionally, Hungarians may have been named after a religious saint.

Hungarian Greetings 

• In the past, greetings have been gender and aged based.
• It’s best to wait until you are told how a person wants to be addressed, before addressing someone you are meeting.
• The older generation may bow to you.
• If you are known by someone and you have met several times, the person will then use your first name.
• A firm handshake and making eye contact is a suitable greeting.
• Friends and relatives will greet each other with a hug and kiss on each cheek, starting on the left side.
• Men will shake hands only if the women extends her hand first.
• Adults will greet children and teenagers by their first names.
• Children and teenagers will be told how to address an adult.
• During Soviet rule, many Hungarian honorifics were erased from social greetings.

Hungarian Families

Hungarians love their families and the centre of the social structure. Grandparents play an important role in helping to raising and teaching their grandchildren. They have strong ties with their immediate family and will live in proximity to their children. In years before, extended families often lived together and may still in the country areas. Food plays a huge role between families and friends. It is a way to show love and generosity.

Hungarians have tended to a patriarchal society, where the male is the authority. Historically, in some country areas, women ate around the dining room, whilst the men sat on chairs at the table. Today city and suburban areas, the main decision makers are both partners and families have modernised in customs and attitudes.


Hungarian Dining Etiquette

Hungarian pride resides in that Hungarians enjoy using the correct forms and want everyone to do the same. Here are forms of etiquette to know:

• Arriving on time is key in showing respect, you will have 5 – 10 minutes “grace time.” At a party you will have a grace period of 30 minutes.
• Replying to an invitation is essential, in a few days of receiving it, not at the last minute.
• Many houses require that you take off your shoes and you will be given slippers, otherwise known as “papucs.”
• Its rude to walk around the house, you are there for socialising, building relationships and enjoying the home cooking and hospitality.
• When in the company of a person, humming, fidgeting, whistling is considered impolite.
• Never make disparaging remarks about Hungarian food, wine and spirits. 
• If you have religious requirements or food allergies, please make your host aware beforehand, never on the day!
• When sneezing, use a tissue. 
• When yawning your mouth should be covered. 
• Never pick your teeth in front of guests or family. 
• Elbows never go onto the table.
• If you are not a close friend, arriving unannounced to someone’s house will cause unease.
• Always use your formal dining manners at any meal and wait for the host to start.
• Most Hungarian meals will be a three-course meal and sometimes even more.
• Breakfast will be a quick and light meal. Lunch traditionally was the main meal of the day however dinner is fast becoming the main meal.
• Leaving food on your plate is considered rude, as is seasoning your meal with salt and pepper. It may be showing you do not like the food or that the chef is a bad cook.
• If you do not want your glass to be re-filled, leave ½ of wine in the glass. Traditionally, it has been the male of the house that will fill your glass.
• Leaving your place setting neat and tidy with cutlery in the correct place on your plate when finished is a sign of politeness.
• It is traditional for the host to offer and re-offer food and drinks during your lunch or dinner. Offering food and beverages are an indicator of friendship and hospitality.
• You may be served palinka which is a fruit brandy, before or after a meal. Your host will want to drink it with you. Before drinking you will look your host or guests in their eyes, clink glasses and say to your health: Egészségedre or to our health: Egészségünkre.
• Never clink glasses with beer. This goes back to Hungary's 1848 revolution against the Habsburgs. Hungarians vowed not clinking glasses should happen for 150 years. Even now that the time period has now ended, it is still not done.
• When invited, bring gifts such as chocolates, flowers or Western liquor that cannot be found in the supermarket or local corner shop.
• Never bring wine as national pride lies in the wine that is produced in Hungary.
• When bringing a gift, it may be opened in front of you and be thanked for it.
• Many people are superstitious in Hungary and avoid the number 13. When bringing flowers check the number of flowers making sure the total is an odd number. Also avoid lilies, chrysanthemums or red roses.

Talking Topics

• One of the Hungarian characteristics is the love of socialising and sharing stories.
• Positively talking about food, wine, spirits and the how you want to visit certain places in Hungary one day, or even your great experiences traveling there, asking about their family members or talking about good friendships you have had with other Hungarians, will win friends
• Talking about bodily functions, animals, World War I & II, Communism, a person’s economic means, ethnic minorities in Hungary (which may include gypsies and refugees), may be offensive and make your host unhappy.
• Great talking topics: Rubik’s Cube invented by Ernő Rubik, the biro pen invented by László Bíró, Vitamin C discovered by Albert Szent-Györgyi, Olympic Games where476 medals were won. Winning the FIFA World Cup in 1954.

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Mid-19th C. Hungarian Etiquette

 

No account of their habits would be complete, without stating that the whole population, from the nobleman and clergymen, down to the lowest ‘Rauer of the Puszta,’ smoke incessantly, from morning till night.— Above, front and back of a 19th Century collectible cigarette card, featuring international holidays.

Diets and Habits of the Hungarians

An intelligent correspondence of The Independent, giving an account of his observations in Hungary, speaks of the uniformly strong and athletic appearance of the inhabitants. He goes on to speak of their habits of eating as follows I took considerable pains in Hungary to notice the diet and habits of eating as follows:

I took considerable pains in Hungary to notice the diet and habits of eating of the people, as connected with the remarkable vigour of the race, hoping some useful hints might be derived for America on the subject. This seemed more desirable, as there is no country of Europe so resembling our own or at least the Middle States of our own, in climate. The same extremes of heat and cold; the same sudden, violent changes of temperature; the same clear, stimulating atmosphere, which mark the American climate, and distinguish it from usual European. 

There are districts in Hungary which produce the most delicious grapes and melons and peaches in the summer, which are buried in snow in winter, precisely like the inland countries some years in New York. And in travelling over the best part of the land, I might have thought, as far as productions were concerned, I was journeying through the plains of inner New York or Pennsylvania; the only exception being the vine, for the want of which in America I am disposed to think the cause is not to be sought in the climate.

In respect to the habits of the people, the great peculiarity seemed to be there temperance in eating and drinking, and at the same time they're making of the meals a pleasant social occasion, and not nearly means so filling up the stomachs. When I say they are “temperate,”I mean they indulge in no excess; as, in respect to wine-drinking, there is scarcely a man in the land who does not drink the light wine as his dinner and supper. But the Hungarian the meal-time is a time for social intercourse, when friends meet; or when children and relatives or gather with the parents, and have almost that only merry, familiar conversation during the day. 

They sit a great while at table, and taste of great variety of dishes, at least among the better classes. Still they are not by any means as hearty eaters as the Americans or English. Indeed, to a traveller with keen appetite, or to one accustomed to the vigorous exploits of the English at the table, the Hungarian seem really abstemious. They may much more use of fruits, and salads, and curious puddings, and the light pure wines, then we of the Anglo-Saxon race. 

Indeed, the Hungarian will consider himself in danger of becoming a sot, if he should drink every day the strong brandied wines which every Englishman has on his table. The English in Hungary too, and  say it is impossible in that clear, oxy-genated climate, to keep up their habits of beef-eating and drinking. The first meal among the Hungarians is taken at seven or eight in the morning, and consists only of a glass of coffee with rich milk and some meagre cuttings of cold toast broken up eaten in the coffee. This is the universal breakfast for all classes except the poorest Rauer. Between this and the dinner at one or two nothing is usually eaten or drank. 

The dinner, as I have said, is long,with the great variety of dishes, not essentially differing from our own except that it is lighter,and greater use is made of light wines. This meal is always followed up by a cup of coffee. The only other meal is a supper at eight o’clock in the evening – a long meal again, with soup, fish, pudding and wine. Tea is very little drank in the land, sugar and sweetened articles too, are seldom used.

What especial theory of diet, to draw from all this, I am at a loss to determine. Still, the facts may be useful to some who are investigating the matter. The principle things, worthy of imitation, seem to be moderation and sociability of the meals, and the distance time at which they are separated — the last being, no doubt, very conducive to health. The principal cause of their vigorous health, and well-formed bodies, must be found without doubt, in their open-air pursuits and manly exercises, to which they are ardently attached. They are a nation of herdsman of farmers, and are enjoying the benefits of their pursuits.

No account of their habits would be complete, without stating that the whole population, from the nobleman and clergymen, down to the lowest Rauer of the Puszta, smoke incessantly, from morning till night.— Originally published 14th October 1851, New York Times

For many years, Etiquipedia contributor, Elizabeth Soos, has had a keen interest in cultural customs. With her European background and extensive travel, Soos developed an interest in the many forms of respect and cultural expectations in the countries she has visited. With her 20 years’ experience in customer service within private international companies based in Australia, and her lifetime interest in manners and research, she decided to branch out into the field of etiquette and deportment. Through her self-directed studies and by completing the Train-The-Trainer’s course offered by Emma Dupont’s School of Etiquette in London and by Guillaume Rue de Bernadac at Academie de Bernadac based in Paris and Shanghai, she founded Auersmont School of Etiquette.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia