Dining Etiquette of Kings and Queens

It is said that King Edward VII made many changes to Dining in England during his time is King. He famously banished fish knives and forks from royal dining tables, condemning them as “very common.” This sentiment reflected a class divide of the era, where the upper-class “old money” aristocracy viewed the use of specialized fish cutlery as a tacky trait of the newly rich. The aristocracy used a fork on both the right and left sides of the plate to eat their fish. The King was also the one who started the custom of eating asparagus with his fingers at the table, and It was during the Edwardian Era that women could go into a restaurants on accompanied by men for the first time and feel comfortable. — An intimate table with settings fit for a King or Queen

Unique Principles of Table Etiquette of the European Monarchies

Among the Royal Courts of Europe, the dining table has always been far more than a place to eat. It is a stage — carefully choreographed, rich in symbolism and steeped in centuries of tradition. And yet, while the Monarchies of Europe share a common foundation of formal dining protocol, fascinating differences reveal the distinct character of each royal house.

In Britain, the Royal table is governed by strict precedence. Guests follow the sovereign's lead in all things — no one begins eating before the Monarch, and no one continues once the King or Queen has finished. Menus at Buckingham Palace were traditionally written in French for centuries, a custom only recently relaxed. The placement of cutlery, the folding of napkins and the sequence of courses follow rules that have changed little in over a hundred years.

The Spanish Royal House blends formal European protocol with the warmth characteristic of Spanish culture. The *sobremesa* — that cherished post-meal conversation — finds its place even at the most formal of royal tables, reflecting the deeply human side of Spanish hospitality.

In Sweden, Norway and Denmark, the Scandinavian Monarchies maintain formal protocol while embracing a notably more relaxed and egalitarian spirit at the table. Toasts are an important ritual, led by the host, and eye contact during a toast is considered a mark of sincerity and respect.

What unites all European Royal tables, however, is the understanding that dining is a diplomatic art. Every detail — from the arrangement of crystal to the order of precedence at seating — communicates respect, hierarchy and cultural identity.

True elegance is never accidental. It is the result of intention, hard work, knowledge and a genuine desire to honor those seated beside you.

Meet our newest contributor, Isabel. E. Martinez, who was educated in Business Management at the Universidad Católica Andrés Bello, in Caracas, Venezuela. After relocating for a few years to Miami, Florida, Isabel developed a company teaching computer skills. Among her clients were Baccardi in Bermuda, and Mavesa, Telcel (Movistar), and Heinz in Venezuela. That is when she discovered her passion for teaching. As her children became adults, she shifted her focus and dedicated her time to teach on subjects she is very passionate about; Hospitality and Table Etiquette. Throughout workshops in English and in Spanish, Isabel works with employees in the hospitality industry, and those business professionals who when interacting with customers, would like to make sure that they are the most professional representations of their companies. Especially when attending business lunches and events. She also offers youth and teen courses in etiquette, helping them to excel with integrity and pride in whatever field they desire to pursue. To learn more about Isabel, visit her website: www.learningschool2.com or @isasetiquette 

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Edward VII’s Affable Table Etiquette

The prince insists that everybody shall talk at the table without any reference to him, as they would if they were at home; and he banishes mere formality just as far as court tradition will permit.– Public domain image of the former Prince of Wales, King Edward VII King of the United Kingdom

and the British Dominions

Emperor of India

An Affable Prince

I asked Wilder about his parlor entertainments in Europe, and especially about his evenings with the Prince of Wales. “I gave my imitations for him six times,” said the little man. “Last time I saw him was at Mrs. Sloane Stanley’s, and he kindly set me to his right at table. All stand till he sits, and he rises first at the end as a signal to the others. It is not etiquette to eat after he finishes, but he fixes that very neatly by continuing to pick at the food as long as he sees anybody else busy. He is a man of wonderful tact in placing persons at their ease.

“For instance, I took a sip of water on sitting down. That’s water!” said the Prince with a laugh, touching my wineglass. ‘Ah, sir,’ I said, ‘I am a blue-ribbon man. I never drink any wine.’” “No? he said: ‘very well.’ He was polite. He did not quiz me or laugh at or banter me as another might, and say ‘Aw now, just this once, you know.’ Nothing of the sort. He turned the talk to other things.” “About the entertainment?” I asked.

“Oh, my share? Well, I generally have to stand on the table, but the Prince lifted me up on the piano, where, in the intervals of my imitations, there was good music made by an eminent professional. I stood with my face to the Princess and near to her, for she is getting quite deaf. One thing I noticed as odd; the higher up you get the least ceremony there is. The Prince insists that everybody shall talk at the table without any reference to him, as they would if they were at home; and he banishes mere formality just as far as Court tradition will permit.”-Washington Post, 1887

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Rules for Perfect Guests

Author of “In the Royal Manner,” Paul Burrell is a former footman to the late-Queen Elizabeth II and butler to the late-Princess Diana. Though Diana died over a quarter century ago, her enduring popularity has been a constant. It has fueled worldwide interest and exhibits of her personal belongings and wardrobe, which had been auctioned off for numerous charities. Due to her beauty, charm and service to her country, throughout her time as a member of the British royal family, like the late-Queen Elizabeth II, Diana remains an international icon.– Image from an exhibit of Diana’s items, Diana collectibles and framed news’ accounts from Etiquipedia’s personal library and the Etiquette Sleuth blog

MIND YOUR MANNERS, PLEASE

 OR, 

THE ART OF BEING THE PERFECT GUEST

Imagine now that you are going to a party. I have compiled this guide around common etiquette dos and don'ts. Some are more obvious, but others I'm sure will surprise you.

It is advisable to be punctual at an engagement, although it is acceptable to be 10 minutes late, but no more. Traffic and taxis can delay and hamper anyone's arrival though. If you want to take someone with you to the event, it is common courtesy to check with your host beforehand. (If you are hosting a party, and one of your guests brings a friend, there is nothing you can do about it other than to greet them warmly, then address the situation with your inconsiderate guest at a later date.) 

It is polite to take along a small gift for the host or hostess such as flowers, after dinner chocolates, wine or champagne. I have often found a perfumed candle to be a guaranteed success.

There are a few basic rules which should be observed at any dining table.

• Unfold your napkin once you are seated and place it on your lap, and use it to wipe your mouth and fingers during the meal. At the end of the meal it is polite to leave the napkin tidily on the place setting - not scrunched up on the floor!
• The host will always give you a clear indication of when to start the meal. They may begin with a few words of welcome, or Grace, and traditionally the lady sitting on the right of the host is served first, then the rest of the table in a clockwise direction. 
• A knife and fork should be held with the handles in the palm of the hand, forefinger on top, and thumb underneath. Forks should not be turned over unless tackling peas, rice, sweetcorn kernels, or suchlike, in which case transfer the fork to the right hand. 
• At an informal meal, buffet or barbecue, it is of course perfectly acceptable to eat with just a fork.
• It is unwise to use your bread to mop up sauces, although this is customary in other parts of Europe.
• A sweet can be eaten with a spoon and fork, or just a fork if it is of cake-like consistency.
• Rest your knife and fork in between mouthfuls by leaning the knife and fork on the edge of the plate. Only when you have finished should you place them side by side in the centre of the plate.

Should your host present a completely inedible dish, I would suggest that the best course of action is to at least make some attempt at disguising your disgust. Cut it up and move it around your plate a little - perhaps no one will notice. More obviously slurping, burping, picking teeth and licking fingers are particularly unattractive, although it is acceptable to pick up meat on the bone such as chicken legs and spare ribs. It is the only way to eat them. Have a napkin and finger bowl on standby for messy fingers.

Remember that you haven't been invited to dinner just to eat, the evening would be more enjoyable if you made polite conversation, however small, to those sitting on your right and left, and make sure you give both sides equal attention. Don't talk with your mouth full, or sit with your elbows on the table. – From “In the Royal Manner,” by Paul Burrell, 1999 

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

The Etiquette of Carving

In the 15th century, the art of carving properly at the table, was considered an important skill for men. Most early European cookbooks were more carving instructions than actual recipes. One’s reputation could be judged by how well he ceremoniously carved a roast at a large meal. — “The exact spot to begin carving a roast was governed by elaborate rules with slices from the larger beasts presented on a broad-bladed serving carver, cut into four bite-sized pieces held together by the fatty top strap. This was held in the hand, the pieces were chewed off, then it was thrown to the dogs. A thorough knowledge of carving was considered so important that before the golden spurs of knighthood could be granted, a period of noviciate had to be spent as a carving esquire. Carvers in royal and noble households tended to be aristocrats of lesser rank. A knight carved for a baron, a baron for an earl, an earl for a marquis, and so on. The Earls of Denbigh and Desmond are the Hereditary Grand Carvers of England and the Anstruther’s of that Ilk, the heritable Master Carvers to the Royal Household of Scotland. Such was the social gravitas attached to carving, that The Boke of Kervynge was published in 1500 by Wynkyn de Worde for the benefit of upwardly mobile Tudors at a time when few books were being printed at all.” ~ From the field.co.uk

If your husband complains when confronted with the Thanksgiving turkey - you might tell him that carving is the Art of Noblemen. 

In the Middle Ages, Edward IV of England was served by no less than five Royal Carvers, all noblemen of high degree. 

After the carving, correct etiquette for those times called for a sort of “grab and gobble” technique, without benefit of table cutlery! — Desert Sun, 1952

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and a Dinner with the Queen

In her youth, Victoria was reprimanded for her tendency to eat too much and to gobble. There was no privacy for a Queen in waiting and the grisly realities of 19th-century digestive problems were agonised over by everyone – including Victoria’s mother, her uncle Leopold and Lord Melbourne, the prime minister. The young Victoria herself fretted over her weight – at her very slimmest, she was just over seven stone. After Albert’s death, she became a trenchant if joyless eater, ploughing through course after course, still gobbling. The weight piled on. A politician forced to endure a meal with the old Queen wrote that it was a dismal experience: “I personally never heard her say anything at dinner which I remembered the next day. Her manners were not affable; she spoke very little at meals, and she ate fast and very seldom laughed.” Her physician Sir James Reid left detailed notes on the weary regularity of the Queen’s problems with flatulence, bowel irritation and stomach upsets. – The Guardian on Annie Gray’s Book on Queen Victoria, 2017

Regarded from a gastronomic point of view, it appears that there is nothing particularly, desirable in dining with the Queen, although it is a privilege much coveted by ambitious men. A distinguished divine, who occasionally preaches at Windsor, and dines and sleeps there afterward, said the other day that the dinner was a remarkably unsatisfactory affair to a hungry man. It is not etiquette to continue eating of any particular course after the Queen has partaken of it to her satisfaction; and as Her Majesty eats very little the courses are harried over. 

After dinner there is hardly time to take even one glass of wine before coffee is brought in. The Queen does not put her cup on tbe table, but sips a little as the servant holds it on the salver. Then Her Majesty rises, and of course the guests all rise and stand back from the table. The Queen the makes the round of the room, stopping to talk a few minutes to any one of the guests whom she may delight to honor, and then goes out, leaving the guests to amuse themselves as they like for the evening. – Hour, 1880

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Royal Dining Etiquette for Charles II

 “This charming portrait of Charles II as Prince of Wales was painted for his mother by Sir Anthony van Dyck in 1637 or early 1638. Little did anyone think at the time that armour was to be necessary to his young life, not just as a romantic costume for a portrait but also for his very survival.” —From “At the King’s Table”

The five-year-old Charles, Prince of Wales (later Charles II, 1660-85) dines in state with his parents at Whitehall Palace. He sits at the end of the table, to the left of his mother, Queen Henrietta Maria, who sits at the left hand of the King, Charles I. The young Prince already has his own silver-gilt vessels, made by the Jewel House. 

Sewers, or servers, on bended knee offer dishes to the King and his family. The Prince chooses from the food offered, and the gentlemen carve and taste each portion before it is placed before him. A procession of liveried servants carry in more dishes and lay them on the table, where none but the Royal family dines. Over the King’s head is the canopy of state, erected for him alone. Behind a balustrade at the end of the chamber, well-dressed courtiers and men (mainly men) of quality press to witness every mouthful of the Royal meal. As if to counteract all this formality, a clutch of dogs play and probably defecate around the table. 

This is the formative experience of having dinner for Charles I's eldest son, who, after years of struggle, heartbreak and exile, will return to England to re-create almost exactly this ritual of Royal public dining. In between, he will know danger, hunger and despair, but also loyalty, comradeship and love. He will remember that bread and cheese are better than an empty stomach, but he will never forget that he is the rightful heir to the English and Scottish thrones. — By Susanne Groom, in “At the King’s Table”

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Queen Victoria’s Entertaining Savvy

The ambassador, having mentioned in the morning that his birthplace was Furstenberg, the Queen had recalled to mind a service of china never used, and for nine years put away and forgotten by every one but herself, which had been manufactured there, and was decorated with painted scenes of the town and its vicinity. She knew exactly where it was and how It looked, and by her order it had been produced and used at dinner—surely a very pretty attention from a royal hostess, as well as something of a feat of memory in a royal housekeeper. – An antique Furstenberg china hot chocolate pot. Furstenberg china is the second oldest porcelain company in Germany and its antique pieces are highly collectible.

Victoria as a Housekeeper 

England’s Queen Demands Good Service, but Pays Employees Liberally

The sound business capacity and marvelous memory for details which serve Queen Victoria so well in her greater office of sovereign, do not fail to render her successful also in her lesser one of housekeeper. She is the mistress of palaces, castles and country houses, and, although the actual daily housekeeping is, of course, done by deputy, the royal head of the establishment remains ever in a very real sense the mistress. She perceives immediately anything amiss, and perceives also the remedy. She is a kind but also an exacting mistress, and as she pays well, and never fails to consider a reasonable excuse, quite properly demands good service and tolerates no shirking. 

A recent little volume upon her private life relates several entertaining household anecdotes of the royal lady's ways. She has, it seems, a dislike of cold meat, which she never eats, but etiquette demands that at luncheon a side table shall stand ready, provided with cold fowl and a cold joint, no matter what daintier hot food the dining table may offer. Like every good housekeeper, the Queen knows and remembers her valuable household possessions, and is fully aware of their individual merit and the places where they ought to be kept. She does not know them all, for they number thousands, but hundreds of them she does know, and elaborate catalogues are kept of the rest—furniture, bric-a-brac, china, glass, silver, draperies, and other furnishings—by her order, and in large leather bounds books provided in accordance with her ideas. Only a small proportion of her many hundred articles for table service are actually in ordinary use, and she is in the habit of using but three of her many services of plate and china at Windsor Castle. 

But once, after a talk with the German ambassador, who was visiting her, the members of the Queen’s household were surprised on coming to the table to behold strange china set before them, each plate adorned with landscape paintings. It soon appeared that, the ambassador, having mentioned in the morning that his birthplace was Furstenberg, the Queen had recalled to mind a service of china never used, and for nine years put away and forgotten by every one but herself, which had been manufactured there, and was decorated with painted scenes of the town and its vicinity. She knew exactly where it was and how It looked, and by her order it had been produced and used at dinner—surely a very pretty attention from a royal hostess, as well as something of a feat of memory in a royal housekeeper. –Placer Herald, 1898

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette Changed for WWI

And George V also wanted Brits to quit drinking alcohol during WWI — “It is no longer according to etiquette to place any wines or liquors on the table whenever King George is a guest at military messes or with the fleet, says The Spectator, which is conducting an active campaign for prohibition during the war.“

The King's Host's Also Abstain

No Wines or Liquors at Messes Where George is Guest

London, March 30— It is no longer according to etiquette to place any wines or liquors on the table whenever King George is a guest at military messes or with the fleet, says The Spectator, which is conducting an active campaign for prohibition during the war.

The King's order, barring the use of alcoholic beverages in his palaces during the war, is being adhered to rigidly. No wine is served, even at dinner parties at Buckingham Palace or at Windsor.

The Spectator recalls the fact that after the King's accident in France, when he was thrown from his horse, his physicians prescribed a small amount of wine. As soon as the doctors orders were withdrawn, however, the King renewed his abstinence. The New York Times, 1917

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

The Royal Finger Bowl

Above: The finger bowls for the fruit or dessert course, currently being used for royal dinners at Buckingham Palace.— These early 19th century bowls were originally known as ‘wine rinsers’ and, occasionally, ‘wine coolers’. They were designed to rinse one’s wine glass in between the serving of various wines at a multi-course, formal dinner. A rinser would be placed within reach of each diner, filled 1/4 to 1/3 of the way up the bowl, with the coldest water possible, for rinsing and/or cooling a glass. Like miniature Monteith bowls, the wine glass would be inverted into the water. The stem of the glass would rest there in the water, until the next wine was poured, hence the “lips” on either side for resting the stems of the glasses. Theses bowls are sitting upon small, cocktail-sized napkins, placed atop the plate for the dessert or fruit course, along with the utensils for the course. It is more common to see a doily accompanying the finger bowl, however the word “doily” once referred to any small piece of woven linen. In either case, these should not be used to wipe or dry one’s hands. They are merely “seats” for the finger bowls once they are moved from the plate to the table.

—Photo source, “For the Royal Table: Dining at the Palace”

It is said to be a point of etiquette that when a member of the royal family dines, only the royal guest is supplied with a finger-bowl. The origin of this custom is perhaps not generally known, and is both curious and interesting. In the early days of the present dynasty, it was a matter of doubt who was loyal, and, when the toast of “The King” was given, all the Jacobites, as a matter of conscience, secretly passed their glasses over any water that happened to be near generally the finger-bowl. This action signified that the person so doing drank his toast to“the King over the water” —the exiled Stuart. When this became known the Court made a decree that no water was to be within reach of any of the guests, and singularly enough this rule holds till to-day. — The Weekly Calistogan, 1902

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Dining with British Royalty

A typical 19th century “game plate.” – The “game course” was once a staple of fine dining and expensive sets of “game plates” were purchased by fastidious hosts and hostesses, to serve the game on to each of their dinner guests. In Gilded Age dining, after the roast course, the game course was next in order (if it was included, as it generally was in an elaborate dinner). Celery was the appropriate accompaniment of the game course. The salad was sometimes served with the game; otherwise it followed as a course by itself. According to gunsonpegs.com, the Pheasant Shooting season runs from the 1st October – 1st February in Great Britain, however in Northern Ireland the Pheasant Shooting season runs from the 1st October – 31st January.

The Ever-Present Pheasant

There can be no doubt about pheasant being the favorite game dish of the Queen and Prince Philip, and when in season it appears repeatedly on the Royal menu. For this reason there is always a large number of pheasants stored in the giant deep-freeze, which the Queen had installed in the palace kitchens some years ago. Previous to this, selected game and fish were sent to several deep-freeze stores in London for the palace kitchens to draw upon when required. 

In addition to pheasant, the Queen's chefs keep a healthy supply of game deep-frozen in readiness, as seen from this typical palace list:

• 55 pheasants 

• 33 partridges 

• 21 woodcock 

• 20 grouse 

• 3 snipe 

• sand grouse 

• venison

• 33 salmon 

• 4 lb prawns 

• 2 lobsters

At Balmoral and Sandringham the success of the hunting and shooting on the moors and fields always has a direct bearing on the main course for dinner which is why grouse, venison, pheasant and partridge appear in a variety of forms with great regularity. After the Court returned to London from Balmoral, the Royal family would also hold regular shooting parties in Windsor Great Park. 

An individual “bird knife and fork” in the Chantilly sterling pattern. The game course could consist of partridge, pheasant, duck, woodcock, snipe or other popular birds eaten in the 1800's. The steel-bladed bird knife was the forerunner of the stainless steel, steak knife we know today, after a serrated edge was added.

In the days of Edward VII there were lavish supplies of hot food for the Royal shooting parties, even though it was relatively simple by his standards. A typical picnic lunch might consist of mulligatawny soup and Scotch broth, stewed mutton, hashed venison, Irish stew and game pies. For dessert there would be plum pudding and apple tart. – From the book, “Dinner at Buckingham Palace”

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Royal Dining Etiquette Brief

It is not etiquette to eat while the King is not doing so. Due to the King’s shorter dinners in 1913, a third of the wine was not drunk that used to be drunk at fashionable British tables.

King’s Dinner Guests Drinking Less Wine Now

Ruler, an Indigestion Sufferer, Causes Banquets to be Much Shorter

Dinners grow shorter each season. King Edward VII was the first to set the cult of the brief dinner and King George V, who, in spite of the greatest care, is still dyspeptic, cuts them shorter still, as he does not taste half the courses and consequently it is not etiquette to eat while the King is not doing so. A third of the wine is not drunk that used to be drunk at fashionable tables.– London, 23 February, 1913

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia  

The Etiquette of Serving Charles II

One of the most popular monarchs to play is Charles II, or “the Merry Monarch”
 (as portrayed by Rupert Everett, above)

Few courts have been more brilliant than that of the Merry Monarch. All the beauty of fair women, the gallantry of brave men, and the gaiety of well-approved wits could compass, perpetually surrounded His Majesty, making the royal palace a lordly pleasure house. Noble banquets, magnificent balls, and brilliant suppers followed each other in quick succession. Three times a week—on Wednesdays, Fridays, and Sundays—the King and Queen dined publicly in ancient state, whilst rare music was discoursed, and many ceremonies observed, amongst these being that each servitor of the royal table should eat some bread dipped in sauce of the dish he bore. 

On these occasions meats for the King's table were brought from the kitchen by yeomen of the guard, or beef-eaters. These men, selected as being amongst the handsomest, strongest, and tallest in England, were dressed in liveries of red cloth, faced with black velvet, having the King's cipher on the back, and on the breast the emblems of the Houses of York and Lancaster. By them the dishes were handed to the gentlemen in waiting, who served royalty upon their knees. “You see,” said Charles one day to the Chevalier de Grammont, “how I am waited on.” “I thank your majesty for the explanation,” said the saucy Frenchman; “I thought they were begging pardon for offering you so bad a dinner.” [This mode of serving the sovereign continued unto the coming of George I.] – From Royalty Restored or London Under Charles II, by J. Fitzgerald Molloy, 1885

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

British Coronation Etiquette – King Henry VIII

Henry VIII acted like an animal at times, but not while dining. Yes, even many “etiquette experts” get it wrong. One was quoted as saying this, upon the release of his 2013 book of etiquette: “In Henry VIII’s time it was good manners to chuck lamb bones over one’s shoulder for the greyhounds to feed. That would cause raised eyebrows these days.” Au contraire, mon frère! When it comes to table manners, we have no grounds to feel superior to Henry VIII. He observed complex etiquette. True, there was at least one occasion when Henry threw sugar-plums at his guests, and, given the gallons of sweetened wine consumed, meals must sometimes have got out of hand. Yet the general rules of table were politer than our own. If Henry overindulged (and surely he did, his waist thickening to 54in after a jousting accident in 1536), he did so with aplomb. Hands were washed before, during and after every meal. He had a special fingerbowl – heated in a chafing dish – and a designated napkin to protect his fine ‘manchet’ bread roll. When he had eaten enough, he stood and washed his hands while an usher brushed crumbs from his royal person.

Remarkable incidents in this most important occasion of a British ruler’s life. Striking features of ceremony from the earliest day to the last great Coronation event of the 19th Century

👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑

The Coronation of England’s Henry VIII

Henry VIII was extremely fond of pageantry and he was particularly anxious about the ceremonials of his Coronation. The Londoners seconded his desires, and when, after having created twenty-four Knights of the Bath, he rode through London from the Tower, June 22. 1509, the streets were hung with tapestry and cloth of arras, and a great part of the south side of Cheap and part of Cornhill were hung with cloth of gold. The several companies and civic dignitaries lined the streets, and Hall tells us:

“The goldsmiths’ stalls unto the end of the Old Change, being replenished with virgins in white, with branches of white wax; the priestes and clearkes in rich copes, with crosses end censers of silver, censing his grace and the Queene also as they passed. The Queene Katherine was sitting in hir litter, borne by two white palfries, the litter covered and richlie apparelled, and the palfries trapped in white cloth of gold: her person aparelled in white satin imbroidered, hir hair hanging downe to hir backe, beautlfull and goodlie to behold, and on hir head a coronall set with manie rich orient stones.” The Coronation was celebrated with brilliant “justs and turneies” which the King and Queen witnessed from “a faire house covered with tapestrie.” 

– San Francisco Call, 1901

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and a Royal Soup

A gratified Monarch, William I, or “William the Conqueror” reigned over England from 1066 to 1087  – In the famous “Bayeux Tapestry,” William the Conqueror is depicted enjoying a fine feast soon after his invasion of England in 1066. If you really wanted to fit into the Norman Court, you needed to mind your manners. You could learn the fine table manners of the day, from a number of etiquette manuals of that period. Daniel of Beccles’ 3000-line poem in Latin, “Urbanus Magnus” (The Book of the Civilised Man), provided an excellent guide to expected courtly behaviour. Medieval etiquette’s maxim was ‘A place for everyone and everyone in his place’. The advice Beccles wrote continues to be relevant; Don’t put your elbows on the table; Don’t lick your fingers; Don’t speak when your mouth is full. ; Belching and spitting were also frowned upon. Or at least if you were compelled to do either, it should be done in the correct manner. If you were to belch, you should look up to the ceiling ; You should never spit over the table but rather behind you or into a cloth; And you should never spit ‘like a rustic’ or ‘eat like a ploughman’. – from English Heritage.org

A Savory Soup Tickles His Palate — Changes Its Name 

William I had a fine sense of what was becoming at a royal table. He was so well pleased at one of his little dinners with a savory soup compounded by his cook, Tezelin, that he sent for him and asked how it was named. “I call it dillagrout” was the reply.” “A poor name for so good a soup” cried the King.  “Nathless”—everybody said “nathless” in those days— “we bestow upon you the manor of Addington.” – This manor, I may add, reverted to the Crown. In the reign of Henry III we find it in the hands of the Bardolfs, and held on the tenure of “making pasties in the King’s kitchen on the day of his coronation or providing someone as his deputy to make a dish called “grout,” and if suet (seym) was added, it was called “malpigernoun.” 

At James II’s coronation, the Lord of the Manor claimed to find a man to make a dish of grout in the royal kitchen and prayed that the King's cook might be the man. The claim was allowed and the claimant knighted. But what was this “grout?” Was it identical with Tezelin’s “dillagrout” and the Bardolfs’ “malpigernoun?” And was a pottage called “Bardolf,” of which a 14th century recipe has been printed by the Society of Antiquaries, identical with these? If so, as among the ingredients were almond milk, the brawn of capons, sugar and spices, chicken parboiled and chopped, etc., it was doubtlessly a dish for a King.— All the Year Round. – May 4, 1891

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Royal Dinner Party Etiquette

Sir Henry Frederick Ponsonby, was a British soldier and royal court official who served as Queen Victoria's Private Secretary.

Royal Dinner Parties in England of 1889

The royal dinner parties of England are the most formal and studied in the world. To beginners, they become a frightful ordeal, and they rarely at the end can tell what the meal consisted of; to old stagers they are a frightful bore. The novices are expected to arrive early so as to be posted by Sir Henry Ponsonby in court etiquette. The Queen usually receives her guests for afternoon tea in her own sitting room, and remains a short time with them chatting on light subjects; then they are permitted to wander over the castle or stay in their rooms till dinner time, which is at 9:00. She says a few words to each guest as she enters the dining room, and then leads the way to the table. 

It always seems so discourteous for no one to step up and offer the old lady his arm, but it would require an equal in rank to do so, and she enters and leaves the room alone. There is very little conversation at the table. Each guest is asked one question by the Queen and can make one reply. The pauses between are dreadful, and the mechanical parceling out of questions and answers makes it seem as if the Queen were putting a Bible class through its catechism. Each one waits for his turn to come next, and in the embarrassment the “answers” are often of the most stupid kind.—New York Star

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Etiquette Over Royal Pretender

“Some people have declared that the Jacobites used to drink from the finger bowls themselves to ‘Charlie across the water,’ but this is a needless aspersion on the followers of James II...” – The focus of the Jacobitism political movement in Great Britain and Ireland. Jacobites and Charles Edward Stuart (1720 – 1788) aka “Bonnie Prince Charlie” aimed to restore him and his heirs to the thrones of England, Scotland, France and Ireland.

Royal Etiquette for Finger Bowls

During a visit of Royalty in a country house everybody rises when the Royal personage enters a room, but there is another custom which is perhaps little known to the outside world. That is a curious rule regarding finger bowls. 

At dinner parties where any members of the Royal family happen to be present, none of the other guests is provided with a finger bowl. The reason given for this practice is that it is a custom dating from the time of the pretender, when the Jacobites used to drink from them to “Charlie across the water.” – Los Angeles Herald, 1902

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Queen Victoria’s Breakfast Etiquette

A trend for tartan and tweed was inspired across the Kingdom due to Queen Victoria’s and Albert’s love of Scotland. They visited Scotland repeatedly, and after taking possession of Balmoral in 1848, they actually built a castle of their own.

The Queen’s Scottish Breakfast

A correspondent, after picturing the simplicity of the life at Balmoral during the Queen’s stay there, describes one of her ordinary, everyday breakfasts. The following is the menu of the breakfast served one day last week: 

Scotch porridge, cold rump steak pie, hot rump steak, cold gammon of bacon, boiled eggs, Scotch scones, brown bread, butter, honey, tea, coffee, and a kind of cocoa specially prepared for the Queen. The porridge was placed on the sideboard, and was served to each guest in blue and white china basins. These basins were filled by the attendants, as a matter of course, without any question as to whether porridge was wanted or not. It was evidently required by Court etiquette that the meal should be begin with this solid foundation, and that individual tastes of the honored visitors had to be kept in abeyance. 

Our informant expresses surprise that there was no game on the table, considering that to his certain knowledge, the larder was full of grouse shot by Prince Henry and the keepers, which certainly wanted eating. He is probably not aware that the Queen cannot tolerate the smell of game the first thing in the morning, and only allows it at the  later meals, out of deference to the tastes of others.—London Correspondent for The New York World, 1888

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Royal Tastes

“When the future King Edward VII was visiting the U.S., the most striking thing to him was the prevalence of the eating of oysters, the smell of them, raw, cooking, and cooked, and the sight of the shells, being unpleasant to him...” – For centuries, the royal family was not allowed to eat oysters, crabs, and other shellfish and the future King may not have acquired the taste of oysters. It has always been included in the required etiquette for entertaining Royal family members, not to serve them shellfish. Before scientists understood shellfish allergies and food poisoning, it was advised that the Royal family abstain from shellfish to avoid dying from those common ailments. Nowadays it’s more of a personal preference than a hard rule. For example, Queen Elizabeth avoids shellfish altogether, while Prince Charles will occasionally enjoy a good oyster.

Taste is in the Mouth of the Beholder... And the Country of That Mouth’s Origin

The dish for which Esau sold his birthright — a dish of lentils — was hardly equivalent to one of dried beans. To an epicure, there might have been some excuse for the barter bad it been a choice viand, but little for anything so ordinary as lentils. The flesh pots after which the Israelites longed so much while in Egypt and on their journey through the desert, would hardly be appetizing to their descendants who are now scattered through the lands where gastronomy has become an art. 

Climate, as well as race, has much to do with this. In a warm one, a sober diet of drink and food is more essential than in a cold one. The English in India who refuse to recognize this law, return in a few years with a torpid liver and a yellow complexion. The appetite of the Arab is satisfied with rice, olives, bread, and an occasional meat stew, while the Russian sates himself with greasy food aud strong liquor. If nothing more unctuous is within reach, the peasant will eat a tallow dip with relish. The Italian of Southern Italy can content himself with maccaroni, while the Dutchman, surrounded with water and fog, requires meat, ale and gin, in generous portions. 

According to a medical authority of London, when the Indians, in their long journeys, are seized with hunger, they eat small balls of clay, which remain in the stomach and stop the appetite for many hours. Germans are in the habit of eating uncooked meat in the guise of ham, sausage and fresh meat, for which a physician affirms that many of them have had 50,000 worms in one inch of their flesh, penetrating everywhere, and producing death. The promptings of nature are not much heeded in the United States, for the food which is consumed in Maine is also eaten in Florida. The same pork, salted, cured, and fresh, seen in these two geographical extremes, is also familiar to the inhabitants of California, Indiana, and Delaware. The bills of fare of the restaurants of New Orleans resemble much those of New York, the promise, however, being more faithfully kept in the northern than in the southern city.

Each nation, notwithstanding cable telegrams and rapid steamships, retains certain food characteristics. Some of these, the stranger naturally remarks on, as soon as he comes into the country. When the Prince of Wales was here the most striking thing to him was the prevalence of the eating of oysters, the smell of them, raw, cooking, and cooked, and the sight of the shells, being unpleasant to him. During his sojourn he was always endeavoring to escape from the smell of them, and to this day probably his recollections of America are intimately associated with the testaceous animals. 

The amateur of cooked oysters will affirm, and probably with reason, that the Prince did not know what was good; but that is a matter of opinion. The Prince likely, as most Englishmen are, is fond of eating lettuce and cheese together, which the amateur of cooked oysters would probably dislike as much as the royal guest did his favorite food. According to the newspapers, when another member of a royal family, not long ago, was traveling through the United States, he said his chief objection to the country was that he could not get anything to eat; the remark being made after going through the South and West, and before reaching the metropolis. The hope was held out to him in Philadelphia that in New York he would find compensation for the trials which he had undergone in other parts ot the Union ; but he was skeptical, and counted on little improvement. If a reporter of the press may be credited, he went so far as to say that we were the worst fed ot all civilized peoples. Some weight may be attached to this opinion, as he who gave it has some reputation as a gas tronomer.

To go from royalty to the proletariat, the workingmen's delegates to the Centennial Exhibition complained of the food which was placed belore them by their fellow-workmen here. They were simple toilers, unaccustomed to the delicacies of the table. Thus all classes, from well-fed foreign countries, appear to entertain much the same opinion as regards the American kitchen. Eating a particular kind of food, together with the preparation of it, is so much a matter of custom that we are apt to like that best which we have been accustomed to eat ; hence it is that the foreigner favors his own nourishment and pronounces against ours to the extent that he does. 

Man everywhere is almost as tenacious of the form of his food as is of his religion ; errors and abuses in one being nearly as difficult to eradicate as in the other. But after making do allowance for prejudice in the mind of the foreigner, there is probably foundation for at least a portion of his criticism, entertained as it is in different lands. There is such unanimity on this head that there is warrant for believing, if an international congress of gastronomy were to be organized, that the United States would not hold the rank of some other nations which we are wont to regard as considerably behind this one in general civilization. — Galaxy, 1876

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia  

Etiquette of a Royal Palate

 “There is no worthier accomplishment for a man with a moustache than to take soup in an inoffensive manner… and by no means should the moustache be used to strain the soup.” Cornelia Dobbs’ 1908 “Guide to Manners” 

You wouldn't believe it from those fierce mustaches of his, but King Humberto of Italy has so great an affection for custards, and very sweet ones at that, that he would get up in the night to partake of one. To vary the custard eaten by ordinary mortals, however, this Royal personage has his flavored with tea.

Dishes That Kings and Queens are Fond Of ...

The saying “fit to set before a King” has rather lost its significance in these days when everybody knows what everybody else does, and when no two, be they Kings or commoners, do any one thing alike. It is safe to say, however, that Royalty, like the rest of human beings lives as “high” as circumstances will permit till dread indigestion waits on their appetites and makes life miserable for them. Queen Victoria, in her earlier years, though perhaps not being strictly speaking a gourmet, was fond of good things and plenty of them, but of late she has had to shade down both quality and quantity, till she is almost on the verge of being a vegetarian. 

The Prince of Wales probably has the art of dining down as fine as any gentleman, titled or otherwise, in the world. What he doesn't know about dining and the like isn't worth knowing. The Kaiser also knows palatable dishes when he sees them, though he hasn't the respect amounting to reverence that characterizes his uncle, Albert Edward, for a properly cooked and served dinner. Germany’s ruler cares for game, feathered game, more than for any other viand, affecting a special fondness for salmi or stew made of thrushes. Another Royal example of ability to recognize a good thing is furnished by the Czar of Russia, who is just disloyal enough to his country to confess publicly a preference for French cooking; this, however, doesn't say that he does not care for Russian cooking. In fact, it is said that a happy combination of French and Russian manners and methods is what tickles the palate of the Czar of all the Russias beyond expression. 

You wouldn't believe it from those fierce mustaches of his, but King Humberto of Italy has so great an affection for custards, and very sweet ones at that, that he would get up in the night to partake of one. To vary the custard eaten by ordinary mortals, however, this Royal personage has his flavored with tea. Queen Wilhelmina has an appetite that would do credit to any peasant in her domain, and no finicky things for her, if you please. She will have roast beef, mutton and fillet of beef and rump steak as her regular diet, and at her feasts on great occasions, also, if she can have her own way. Another Queen who goes in for roast beef is Christina, Regent of Spain. It isn't that she is over fond of this diet herself, but she believes firmly in its strength producing virtues, and she in this way sets her young son an example, for the young King needs considerable toning up by way of diet. All of which goes to show that royalties don't dine every day from nightingales’ tongues and the like, even though they might, nor upon any other, impossible viand.—Epicure, 1900

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Royal Dinner Etiquette

An etiquette conundrum – Either this screen shot shows that the t.v. series “Victoria” is historically inaccurate, as she is not wearing her gloves (a breach of etiquette, but Queen Victoria’s poor etiquette was well known and expected for the television show) or this is a historically inaccurate portrayal of a Royal state banquet. And what on earth is that crumpled napkin doing on the table? – “The Queen never removes her gloves during dinner, except at state banquets. This is a singular piece of etiquette, and one would think that it would be exactly the reverse. Her gloves are new, of white kid, embroidered with black, never worn but once, and become, after using, the perquisites of the Ladies-in-Waiting.” 

Royal Dinners

Peeps at the Tables Where Things Are Served in State

 

The strict ceremonial of dinners of Queen Victoria has not changed since her assumption of the throne. A quarter of an hour before the time fixed for the repast —generally 8 o'clock—all the party invited to dine with the Queen meet in the Grand Salon and form themselves into a half circle about the door where she is expected to enter. The Queen, on entering, makes a beautiful courtesy (for which she is reknowned), then bows to the gentlemen, and gives her hand to the ladies, who courtesy deeply. She then goes in first to the table, accompanied generally by one of her sons. If any Imperial or Royal person is present, he sits at her right hand. But even in the case of General Grant she placed the Princess Beatrice between them. 

The Queen never removes her gloves during dinner, except at state banquets. This is a singular piece of etiquette, and one would think that it would be exactly the reverse. Her gloves are new, of white kid, embroidered with black, never worn but once, and become, after using, the perquisites of the Ladies-in-Waiting. The Queen has a small but beautiful hand. As soon as she has finished a certain “plat” everyone else stops eating of it, as when she finishes her fish everyone else stops eating fish, etc... After she has spoken to her guests on either side, conversation may become general, but in a subdued tone, always deferring to the sovereign. Sir Arthur Helps, who was her Private Secretary, used to tell an amusing anecdote of being snubbed by her for telling a rather funny story down the table, among the Ladies-in-Waiting, to relieve the monotony of a dreary dinner, when the Queen remarked: “What is it? We are not amused.” She has, however, a love for fun, and sometimes laughs heartily. 

The dinners at the Quirinal Palace in Italy are far more simple as to etiquette. The same formality is observed in the entrance of the King and Queen, but the conversation is more general and the Queen does not wear her gloves. She converses in English fluently. The King only speaks Italian and French, so the conversation is generally in those two languages. French, of course, is supposed to be a universal language. The dinners of Germany are not long, but they are formal and tedious, and the cooking does not commend itself to all tastes. The perfection of a dinner is found in London, generally at the house of Ambassadors, who combine the Excellencies of all nations with the follies of none. After asking the consent of the ladies present, the Italian and Turkish embassies allow the smoking of cigarettes between the salad and dessert. This fashion prevails in France and Russia, ladies smoking quite freely as men. 

The dinners of the Czar and the richer Russian Princes are models of their kind. It was the Russians who invented the idea of serving the dishes all from the outside; hence a service à la Russe, which prevents the tablecloth from being smeared with gravy and other greasy substances. The choice porcelain and glass, the gold and silver, beautiful ornaments— these are the wonder of all travelers who visit Russia. The old fashion has returned again of a sort of elevated tray, or little table in the middle of the table, on which are placed the choice silver jugs, ornamented pieces, and the flowers, fruits, candied fruits — indeed, the ornamental pieces of the dinner. This sort of tray, to be at its best, should be of inlaid wood, bound in silver, and of the time of Louis Quinze. A real antique of this kind is highly prized in France, England and Italy. For the breakfast-table a rotating round china standard, in two parts for the jam, honey, butter, powdered sugar, potted meats, etc., and other belongings of a breakfast, is almost universal in England.— Harpers Bazar, 1887

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia