Global Etiquette of Parting Ways

“An English woman shakes hands with a man of her acquaintance, while in Spain she always gives her hand to be kissed.” – During the late 19th C. Gilded Age, wealthy American men adopted the custom of kissing a lady’s hand. It was often seen at the time being done by the men of the aristocracy in Europe. American women found it charming at the time. Many still do to this day! – Above, Pinterest image of Larry Russell and Marian Brook of HBO’s “The Gilded Age”

Of Kissing and Weeping

An English journal prints the following: “A very disagreeable habit of the King of Portugal is that he kisses his male friends. The Princes of our reigning house all do this, and of course it is common enough abroad; but, thank heaven, so far this nasty looking (no matter how really innocent) habit has never become fashionable in this country. 

It is of course all a mere question of etiquette, but let us fervently pray that Englishmen when they meet with or part from their friends will never get to think it the correct thing to kiss one another. Etiquette in parting varies all over the world. In America the men shake hands and the women kiss one another and sometimes cry, for the American ladies are champion ‘weepists.’ 

In France and in Italy, even more the women weep, while the men kiss and hug one another almost as vigorously as if they were in a wrestling match. An English woman shakes hands with a man of her acquaintance, while in Spain she always gives her hand to be kissed. It makes the same sensation in Madrid for a man to take a woman’s hand and shake it as it would in London for a foreigner to seize a lady's hand and kiss it.” – Humboldt Democrat, 1896

 🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia

Italian Hand Kiss Etiquette

An Italian man kisses the right hand of his mother, aunt or elderly friend and the left hand of his sweetheart.

If the woman who visits Rome wishes to follow tradition and “do as the Romans do,” she will be careful never to take her escort’s arm in a Catholic church. Indeed, the guides instruct those who stroll innocently arm in arm about St. Peter’s looking at the pictures, frescoes and altars of that wonderful cathedral, that they are committing an impropriety. Italians are very particular about the etiquette of kissing the hand. 

A man kisses the right hand of his mother, aunt or elderly friend and the left hand of his sweetheart. It is not permitted him to kiss the palm of the hand except in great and affectionate intimacy. It is regarded as a token that he is very much in love. Upon arriving at a formal dinner a gentleman takes the hand of his hostess and bends low over it as if about to kiss it, but does not do so. After dinner etiquette demands that he take her hand again and kiss it. —New York World, 1893

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette of Royal Handshakes

King Humbert of Italy... A declared foe to all kinds of Court ceremonies, he avoids having anything more to do than is absolutely necessary with his Court officials, but in his excursions in the country likes to shake hands with the farmers and peasants.

Royal Handshaking –Only Humbert of Italy Likes It —Other Monarchs and M. Faure Do Not

Kaiser Wilhelm, who lately has had many occasions for public greetings, does not at all like to offer his hand to any one in public. He rarely makes exceptions in this matter and then usually only for commanding officers at the time of the great army maneuvers. Even more than he does the Emperor of Austria abstain from the custom of handshaking, for it is only Archdukes that he greets or parts from in this fashion. The Czar when he receives Princes is wont always to shake hands cordially with his guests. Only one has he embraced so far, M. Felix Faure.

The Queen of England, with traditional feminine grace, holds out her hand to be kissed; but her son, the Prince of Wales, often seizes the opportunity of giving people a hearty handshake. The King of the Belgians is fond of holding in his, a lady's slender hand, and never fails to imprint a kiss on it; but he objects to shaking hands with men. The amiable young Queen of Holland would like, if etiquette did not forbid, to shake hands with everybody.

The simplest of all rulers, however, is King Humbert of Italy. A declared foe to all kinds of Court ceremonies, he avoids having anything more to do than is absolutely necessary with his Court officials, but in his excursions in the country likes to shake hands with the farmers and peasants. As regards President Felix Faure, he embraces the czar, kisses her gracious majesty's hand, shakes the right hand of the Queen regent of Spain's Ambassador, especially when it bears him a Golden Fleece, but considers it beneath his dignity to hold out his hand to any one as low as a secretary of legation.—Munchener Zeitung, 1899

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia