Bedouin Desert Dining Etiquette

After dinner, a huge fire of corncobs, or sticks and camel dung, is lighted in the tent, about which we gather and enjoy the after dinner cup of coffee and a smoke, and, should we be in the mood, talk. The Arabs have one excellent point of etiquette. Talk for talk’s sake is not expected. Ever ready for a yarn, they eagerly respond should you wish to converse, but the luxury of silence is not denied if one’s mood be thoughtful. 

Life in the Desert –

The Arabs are Abstemious and said to Enjoy the Luxury of Silence

“In the Desert With the Bedouin” is the title of an article in The Century, written and illustrated by the English artist, R. Talbot Kelly. Mr. Kelly says in his article: 

Desert life induces habits of abstemiousness. Rising with the sun, a dish of cumis, or mare's milk, and a small cup of black coffee are the only refreshments generally partaken of. The day is spent following one’s pursuits, and, with the exception of an occasional cup of coffee aud some very light “snack, ” one has no meal of any kind till after sundown. One quickly becomes accustomed to long fasting and abstinence from any form of drink, and the simple dinner at night is more keenly enjoyed in consequence. 

Though plain, the food is excellently cooked, and usually consists of a huge tray of rice, over which is poured a dish of semna, or liquid butter. Round the tray are pigeons stuffed with nuts and spices, and the pyramid of rice is surmounted by a lamb or kid, frequently cooked whole. Boiled beans, and perhaps a few fresh herbs, appear occasionally, which, with the usual flat loaves and a large dish of ris-bil-laban, or boiled rice pudding, complete the meal. Salt is seldom seen—a distinct privation—except on the first day of your visit, and drinking water is often scarce. 

After dinner, a huge fire of corncobs, or sticks and camel dung, is lighted in the tent, about which we gather and enjoy the after dinner cup of coffee and a smoke, and, should we be in the mood, talk. The Arabs have one excellent point of etiquette. Talk for talk’s sake is not expected. Ever ready for a yarn, they eagerly respond should you wish to converse, but the luxury of silence is not denied if one’s mood be thoughtful. 

The idea of a fire in one’s tent may strike some of my readers as a superfluity, but the nights are often intensely cold, and after bathing in the sun all day, with the thermometer at 90 to 100 degrees in the shade, the sudden fall of temperature to little above freezing point is very trying, and, in spite of fire, blankets and a thick ulster, I have frequently been obliged to go outside and run about in order to restore circulation to my half frozen extremities. –Humbolt Times, 1897

 Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Bedouin Dining Etiquette

On Arabs - “One of the greatest and most common mistakes is to generalise about ‘the Arabs’. One might just as well generalise about Europeans. Moroccans and Dubaians are both Arabs the same as Swedes and Italians are both Europeans, but there the similarity ends. Even commonality of language is not as great as many think. Whilst it is true that written Arabic is uniform from country to country, spoken Arabic is extremely dialectic to the extent that a Moroccan and a Dubaian each speaking her own dialect of Arabic would find it difficult to understand each other because the former dialect is heavily influenced by Berber and the latter by Farsi. The code of proper behaviour is remarkably consistent from one Arab country to another, basically varying only in intensity. It is impossible to cover all local variations. Not surprisingly, the strictest interpretation and observance is in the heartland of both the Arabs and Islam; what is now the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. Saudi custom will therefore be the benchmark of what follows because if one behaves properly on Saudi standards, he is unlikely to go astray in any other Arab country.” - Asfar.org

Dining with the Bedouins – 

“Before we began to eat, there was the hand-wash enjoined by the Koran. The water was poured on our hands out of a jug outside the tent, about half a pint being allotted to each. The process was brief. The Arabs swung their hands, flapped them on their garments, and it was done—and they were no cleaner than before. This clearly was not the hygienic operation which Mohammed intended it to be, but as may be inferred fiom this description, people here, as elsewhere, are prone to obey the letter of the law rather than its spirit. I observed subsequently that when they desired to cleanse themselves more thoroughly they rubbed their hands with sand, and on rare occasions with soap. Semi-purified, we returned to our places in the tent, and the repast was served without a woman in sight. 

“It consisted of a huge wooden bowl, about three feet in diameter, lined with thin batter cakes and overhanging the sides, the bowl being filled with boiled rice saturated with grease, probably butter made from goat's or camel's milk; in the centre of the rice was piled up a quantity of boiled mutton. The chief setting the example, we fell to on this mess, while the retainers and our dragoman, off the carpets, eyed us with envy and watered mouths. 

“For a man accustomed to a knife and fork the eating presented difficulties, which, however, were partially overcome by closely observing the men who have never known any aid in this way, than what nature has given them. Yet they have an etiquette which governs them as tyrannically as our own. Only the right hand may be thrust into the bowl. He who eats with the left is ill-bred, and he who employs both, is a glutton. 

“We imitated our hosts as well as we could; thrust the right hand into the rice, made a ball of it the size of a hen's egg, I squeezed the superfluous water and grease out of it, and twitched it into the mouth by a dexterous movement of the thumb, after the Bedouin manner, pronouncing occasionally the indispensable ‘taib’ in compliment to the Amphitryon. Another feature of Arab etiquette was to confine oneself to the same place in taking from the bowl, each one making his own hole and remaining therein. 

“In the beginning of the repast there is not so much trouble in observing the rule; but when the general level of the rice and mutton lowered it required care to remain on the preempted domain, and not invade that of the neighbor. The rule was hardly observed by my neighbor on the left, who was a voracious eater, with an indifferently clean hand; he at length ate away the barrier, entered my territory, and pushed me to the right, where I fed on a narrow ledge until my appetite was satisfied: when this gave way, and the two holes merged into one, I stopped.”—Albert Rhodes, in "The Galaxy", 1876

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Moroccan Dining Etiquette

A "diffa" is an Arabic reception or banquet. General Mark Clark and Caid El Ayadi dining in 1943

"Morocco Etiquette"

General Mark Clark, head of United States forces in Morocco, is eating with his fingers at the great diffa, or feast, given by the rich, Caid El Ayadi, on the occasion of a wolf hunt. General Clark and his staff enjoyed the diffa immensely. — 
As reported in The Enterprise and Scimitar, May 1943

Dining in the Middle East

To avoid making your hosts feel uncomfortable, there are a few simple guidelines to follow.

• Bring a small gift of flowers, chocolates, pastries, fruit or honey.
• It’s polite to be seen to wash your hands before a meal.
• Always remove your shoes before sitting down on a rug to eat or drink tea.
• Don’t sit with your legs stretched out – it’s considered rude during a meal.
• Always sit next to a person of the same sex at the dinner table unless your host(ess) suggests otherwise.
• Use only your right hand for eating or accepting food.
• When the meal begins, accept as much food as is offered to you. If you say ‘no thanks’ continually, it can offend the host.
• It’s good manners to leave a little food on your plate at the end of the meal: traditionally, a clean plate was thought to invite famine. It can also suggest to your host that they haven't fed you sufficiently.
• Your host will often lay the tastiest morsels in front of you; it’s polite to accept them.
• The best part – such as the meat – is usually saved until last, so don’t take it until offered.

Etiquette Advce from Lonely Planet.com

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia