Etiquette and an African Princess

West African Royalty, Sara Forbes Bonetta, on her wedding day with her Groom, in 1862. Queen Victoria had raised her as a ‘Goddaughter’ in the British middle class. This description is of the wedding; “The wedding party, which arrived from West Hill Lodge, Brighton in ten carriages and pairs of grays, was made up of White ladies with African gentlemen, and African ladies with White gentlemen. There were sixteen bridesmaids.”

Sarah Forbes Bonetta was born a child of Yoruba Royalty. She was a Princess of the Egbado clan in West Africa. The army of the Kingdom of Dahomey brutally attacked her village when Sarah, was only 4 or 5 years old though, slaughtering her siblings and decapitating her parents. The now orphaned Princess was kept as a slave in the court of Dahomey King Ghezo. The King, a notorious slave trader, had plans for Aina (Sarah’s birth name). She was to become a human sacrifice.

During a visit to King Ghezo, Royal Navy Captain Frederick E. Forbes was able to rescue the young Princess. On a mission to convince Ghezo to abandon the slave trade, Forbes bargained for the Sarah’s life. He persuaded the King to give her to Queen Victoria. Later, in his journal, he wrote: “She would be a present from the King of the Blacks to the Queen of the Whites.” Forbes re-named Sarah after his ship, the HMS Bonetta and his own name. The Princess Aina became “Sarah Forbes Bonetta” and they sailed for England. 

Queen Victoria and Sarah Forbes Bonetta, as portrayed on ITV’s series, “Victoria” – “… back in Shakespeare's day, you could have met people from west Africa and even Bengal in the same London streets. Of course, there were fewer, and they drew antipathy as well as fascination from the Tudor inhabitants, who had never seen black people before. But we know they lived, worked and intermarried, so it is fair to say that Britain's first black community starts here. There had been black people in Britain in Roman times, and they are found as musicians in the early Tudor period in England and Scotland. But the real change came in Elizabeth I's reign, when, through the records, we can pick up ordinary, working, black people, especially in London. Shakespeare himself, a man fascinated by 'the other', wrote several black parts - indeed, two of his greatest characters are black - and the fact that he put them into mainstream entertainment reflects the fact that they were a significant element in the population of London. Employed especially as domestic servants, but also as musicians, dancers and entertainers, their numbers ran to many hundreds, maybe even more. And let's be clear - they were not slaves. In English law, it was not possible to be a slave in England (although that principle had to be re-stated in slave trade court cases in the late 18th Century, like the Somersett case of 1772). In Elizabeth's reign, the black people of London were mostly free. Some indeed, both men and women, married native English people.” –BBC History Magazine

The first meeting between Queen Victoria and Sarah was at Windsor Castle in November of 1850. Opposed to racism, and impressed by Sarah’s intelligence and manners, Victoria recognized her Royal blood by calling her a “Princess.” Queen Victoria soon became Sarah’s “Godmother” and invited her regularly to Windsor Castle. Victoria paid for her education and upbringing after finding guardians for the young Princess. Captain Forbes died a year later, around the same time that Sarah developed a chronic cough, attributed to the climate in England. In an attempt to improve her health, Victoria sent Sarah to Sierra Leone in the hope that her health would improve in the warmer temperatures.

Sarah excelled academically, but was unhappy living in Sierra Leone, and attending the church missionary society school there. Queen Victoria arranged for Sarah’s return in 1855, when she was about 12 years old. She lived in Gillingham, with the Schoen family. Remaining a part of Queen Victoria’s life, Sarah was a guest at her daughter Princess Vicky’s wedding.Sarah received a marriage proposal from Captain James Pinson Labulo Davies, when she was 19. He was a wealthy Yoruban businessman, already a widower and more than 10 years her senior. Initially turning down the proposal, Sarah soon agreed to the marriage. Victoria naturally approved the match. Like other young women her age, Sarah had no financial independence if she remained unmarried.

A large wedding in Brighton followed, with guests both white and black. Much happier than Sarah had initially presumed she’d be, the couple moved to Africa. They had three children: Victoria, named after the Queen, Arthur and Stella. The family returned to England in 1867. Smitten with her young namesake, Queen Victoria not only became Godmother to little Victoria, she paid for her education, as well. Sadly, Sarah died of tuberculosis at the age of 37, on Portugal’s island of Madeira.

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Etiquette and African Kings

An early 1800's depiction of the Ashanti Yam Festival

African "Kings and Barons"

African feudalism is said to be strikingly similar to that of Europe in the eighteenth century. At the great annual festival of the Ashantis —the yam custom—all the Caboceers, Captains, and the greater number of tributary Kings or Chiefs are expected to appear at the capital. The Nobles or Captains against whom the King has cause of complaint are then placed on trial. 

Sometimes a Chief who suspects that he has become obnoxious to the King will not trust himself in the capital without the means of defense or intimidation. Sometimes a powerful Caboceer will bring 8000 armed attendants. This is analogous to the dealings of a Monarch of medieval Europe with his great Barons. 

As among other peoples, the office of King is in some cases hereditary and in some cases elective. There are limited and despotic Monarchies. Many African tribes have a "War Lord" who is one and the same as the "Peace Lord." American Indians and other peoples have a similar custom. 

African Chiefs are said to be generally superior to their followers in physique. Compare the Chieftains and Kings of the Germanic and other peoples. The Chiefs of the Gold Coast have their Court forms and etiquette, their own customs and mode of living. African Kings have their insignia of Royalty the same as European potentates. Some Kings surround themselves with a certain amount of mystery and magic. Their persona are held sacred. The same practices and claims are made by rulers in other lands. — 1907

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and Madagascar's Queen

Throughout her reign, Queen Ranavalona III utilized diverse tactics such as strengthening trade and diplomatic relations with the United States and Great Britain in the hope of staving off impending colonization.

(source: afrikanwomen)

The Palace of the Queen is 2,500 feet above the level of the sea, the capital being located on an elevated plateau. By the time Mr. Finklemeir reached the city he was out of food; the Queen, however, sent him a fat ox for food, and the Chief Minister sent turkeys, geese, chickens, lamb, onions, rice, potatoes and other things in abundance; so they fared well.

Next day, the Queen sent to ask how he endured the fatigues of the journey, and notified him that she would see him on the next Sunday, the 8th of December. On Sunday she sent an escort of Palace officers to conduct him to the throne, where she sat in state with her Ministers around her, and large numbers of ladies and gentlemen, all in European costumes, the Queen wearing white brocade with a Hammelyn cloak hanging from the shoulder. 

She arose and extended her hand for him to kiss as Mr. Finklemeir entered, and he kissed her white kid gloves according to Court etiquette. The Queen is about fifty years of age, quite tall and well educated, and quite graceful. Mr. Finklemeir was astonished to see her skin was what we in America would call "white," and looking young for her age. Mr. Finklemier was next introduced to all the ministers and guests. 

A great deal of gold and embroidery was displayed in the Court dresses of those preterit, and the display was really quite brilliant. After fifteen minutes he witndrew. The officers afterward told Mr. Finklemeir that the Queen was very well pleased with his appearance. The Queen asked him during the interview if he had served in the late war in America, and if he had a family. 

The next day he dined with the Chief Minister, per invitation. The dinner took from 4:00 p.m. to 10:00 at night, and was given in a splendid hall, with a fine band of music playing before the forty guests. The dinner and wine could not be excelled even in Europe. The finest of china and silver sets adorned the table. 

Mr. Finklemeir toasted the Queen in the American language, and the Chief Minister toasted the President and Secretary Seward. Mr. Finklemeir remained in the Capital until the 8th of January, when he bade his adieu, and returned as he came. —1867

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia