Café Etiquette in France

Quaint French café image in art— Don't move chairs or tables around to suit you. If you are in a large group, don't just pile in and start moving everything around to suit your needs. Stand nicely and quietly tell the waiter or waitress of your needs. “We're six and there are only four seats,” for example, and they will generally do what they can to sort you out.
— photo source, Pinterest

Rules of etiquette for café-going:

1. French cafes have certain tables for drinking and certain others for eating. The cutlery gives it away. Don’t sit down at tables set with cutlery and napkins unless you plan to eat a meal. They’re reserved for diners. If you’re just drinking or snacking, pick a bare table.
2. Don’t spread out: Taking side-by-side banquette seats, each with its own table, is no fair if there are only two of you. And in crowded cafes, purses, coats, etc., don’t get a chair of their own.
3. Know what you want before you sit down. A Parisian would no more ask for a menu at a cafe than you would ask for one when you belly up to a crowded bar. (Menus are often posted outside, though, if you must look at one.)
4. Don't move chairs or tables around to suit you. If you are in a large group, don't just pile in and start moving everything around to suit your needs. Stand nicely and quietly tell the waiter or waitress of your needs. “We're six and there are only four seats,” for example, and they will generally do what they can to sort you out.
5. The lack of leg and elbow room can often cause problems for foreign visitors. Keep your elbows in and your knees bent so as to avoid tripping waiters and others coming or going. 
6. Pay when asked. Although you can usually take your time at a cafe, you’ll sometimes be asked for money rather abruptly. The waiter isn’t hassling (or hustling) you; he’s just going off duty and is required to settle up first.
7. Take your time. Expect to take your time. It has been calculated unofficially that the minimum period required to get a waiter’s attention, order, receive and consume your refreshment and then get said waiter to take your money is about 30 minutes. If you’re in a hurry and just want a quick shot of coffee or thirst-quenching beer, stand at the counter (it’ll be cheaper, too).
8. Don’t try to pay with a credit card. Only the tourist traps take them, and they’re quite out of the true cafe spirit. (And don’t complain about the price. You’re not paying “three bucks for a tiny cup of coffee”; you’re paying three bucks for the privilege of sitting in a presumably pleasant environment for as long as you want.)
9. Expect to inhale secondhand smoke. You might deplore them, and the French government might be trying to curtail their use, but cigarettes remain a fact of life in Paris— above all in cafes.

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Café And Restaurant Etiquette

“Tip quietly, discreetly; the girl with you will know you don't kiss and tell,” is the first rule of correct restaurant conduct, according to Niccolo de Quattrociocchi, who ran “El Borracho” in New York. The famed café was well known for it’s “Kiss Room.” Thousands of signed ‘lipstick-kissed’ cards, from various female patrons, hung all around the room. Newcomers added to the cards as time passed, adding to the room’s romantic whimsy.

Man Who Knows New York’s Famed 

‘Café Society’ 

Tells How to Behave Properly in a Café 

“Tip quietly, discreetly; the girl with you will know you don't kiss and tell,” is the first rule of correct restaurant conduct, according to Niccolo de Quattrociocchi, who runs El Borracho, a restaurant and rendezvous of Café Society. 

Nicky Q, as he is better known, has turned author with the issue of his book “Love and Dishes.” The volume is a combination autobiography and cook book, including recipes which Nicky has culled from his own kitchen as well as from the kitchens of other famous eating houses here, and abroad. 

Other rules which Nicky, a stickler for etiquette, puts forth for guidance are: 

• “Your cash looks much nicer than your personal checks. If you must write checks, make sure they are not ‘rubberized.’ 
• “Check your hat when you enter a smart joint. What's two bits to you? 
• “If you are the suave, mysterious type, you talk quietly. People next to you like to carry on conversations of their own, which is impossible if you are a loudmouth.
• “Don’t nag, frighten or otherwise convert waiters into nervous wrecks. Be nice and they will spread the word around about what a gentleman you are—if you are the type that likes to be taken for one. 
• “Make sure you really want what you order. A restaurant is not a department store. Exchanges sag the profit. 
• “If you are a girl, you will look ravishing and very alluring as you comb your hair in a restaurant. But who wants alluring hair flying into his soup?Use the powder room. 
• “If you feel romantic, don’t neck in a restaurant. There is time, place and a quiet room for things of that sort. 
• “Restaurants’ pepper and salt shakers and silver are really no better than yours. Besides, restaurants are not in the souvenir business. 
• “Don’t pick fights in restaurants. Chances are you will lose. 
• “If you feel sleepy, go home. 
• “If you are a boy who consents to his lady friend paying the check, make sure she comes across in the taxi. Everyone sees the money she passes to you under the table. 
• “Don’t be a sound effect eater. Chew with your mouth closed. 
• “Don't rinse your month with coffee. Please!” – New York Times, 1951

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia