Etiquette and Seasonal Standards

The Prime Minister of Great Britain, who had been unilaterally escalating formality by wearing hats all summer, shows up dressed in silk with pearls and high heels. She is quoted as having refused to participate in “a lowering of standards.”– Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners 

When temperatures go up, fashion decorum goes out the window...

Now that “White Shoe Season” is closing (after today, offenders should expect no mercy), let us review the fashion lessons of this past summer. This year's two big fashion stories are, in Miss Manners’ authoritative opinion: 

A. The Prime Minister of Canada suggests that heads of government attending the 14th economic summit conference in Toronto dress casually.

The Prime Minister of Great Britain, who had been unilaterally escalating formality by wearing hats all summer, shows up dressed in silk with pearls and high heels. She is quoted as having refused to participate in “a lowering of standards.” 

The Prime Minister of Canada wears a suit. 

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B. A Washington messenger is barred from entering the Department of Justice while wearing a T-shirt referring to the then-Chief Executive of that establishment as a pig. He responds by:

1. Unsuccessfully arguing the right of free speech. 

2. Unsuccessfully offering to remove the T-shirt in return for access to the building, presumably shirtless. 

3. Successfully arranging to have an acceptably dressed replacement sent from the messenger service in time to deliver the goods as promised.

4. Delivering his problem to the American Civil Liberties Union, which successfully argues his right of free speech. The Department of Justice, charged with demonstrating that it “obviously doesn't understand what the First Amendment is all about,” reverses its ruling after talk of the ACLU's filing a lawsuit. 

Now, what do these two stories teach us? Quite a bit about politics, notably that it makes an awful lot of difference who is doing the talking. Also that anyone hoping to maintain a higher standard than the society generally recognizes has to be prepared to lend practical assistance. If the Department of Justice, like certain restaurants and clubs, kept articles of “proper attire” on hand to lend those whom it deemed improperly dressed, solution 2. might have worked, and there might not have been a need to escalate to 4. The etiquette angle of all this is, naturally, more subtle. 

High symbolism, and some of the low kind as well, is involved. Social symbolism is not something in which modern people are skilled, and summer heat seems to rob them of any dexterity they might have. Each year, a number of otherwise relatively civilized gentlemen can be counted upon to raise a battle cry against the tyranny of the necktie. The more adventurous even suggest a fullscale clothing revolution, so that each man can express his true self. Miss Manners hopes sensible people can see the fallacy here. Clothing does express individual taste, but only within the context of the community. One's identity involves not only the contents of the particular heart or mind, but the age, gender, era, nationality and particular activity in which one happens to be engaged. To choose clothing that violates those requirements is to broadcast that one is in conflict with them. 

When the British Prime Minister refused to don clothes appropriate to relaxation, she was refusing to pretend that the economic summit was an informal gathering of friends, rather than serious international business. Miss Manner is less ready to cheer on the messenger. Since T-shirts proclaim the wearer’s presumed sentiment, it seems reasonable to hold the wearer as accountable for them as if he were uttering the statements publicly aloud. In most situations, that would merely mean that the bearer should be prepared for counter-attacks by people expressing the right of free speech. The confinement of a necktie is nowhere near as risky in summertime as is offering one’s innermost views to the chance reactions of strangers. – Miss Manners, September 4, 1988

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Etiquette of a Later Dinner Hour

“A marked change has taken place in the fashion. The evening dinner has for years been steadily gaining in popularity, and promises to become even more common than it is now. Thoughtful men and women recognize the wisdom of eating lightly at midday, when they are in the full tide of business, and reserving the heartiest repast for an hour when it can be discussed leisurely and digested peacefully.” – 1890

The New Fashionable Time to Dine

Twenty or thirty years ago the late dinner was not nearly so popular as it is now. The majority of people dined in the middle of the day, and not a few of them considered a six-o'clock dinner as an effort after fashion, that was unworthy the imitation of sensible men and women. Even in the large cities, servants rebelled against an alteration of the time-houored custom of serving the principal meal of the day at, or near noon, while in small towns the late dinner was so unusual that it was almost impossible to persuade domestics to consent to it.

A marked change has taken place in the fashion. The evening dinner has for years been steadily gaining in popularity, and promises to become even more common than it is now. Thoughtful men and women recognize the wisdom of eating lightly at midday, when they are in the full tide of business, and reserving the heartiest repast for an hour when it can be discussed leisurely and digested peacefully. Mistresses have learned that there is a gain in keeping the morning free for housework, instead of devoting most of it to the preparation of the dinner.The light lunch eaten in most homes demands much less time in cooking and eating than does a dinner, and leaves those who have partaken of it more fit for work than they would be, were their stomachs burdened with the task of digesting soup, meat, vegetables and dessert.

The late dinner is a more dignified meal than can possibly be made of a similar repast eaten at noon. The festal appearance imparted by the gleam of candles, lamps, or gas upon silver, china and glass, cannot be acquired by daylight. The pleasant harmony around the board of the members of the family, whose positions and interests have been divergent since morning, the happy consciousness that the work of the day is done, the knowledge that there is no toil waiting at the door of the diningroom, all bear their share in rendering the meal cheerful and care-free. 

More ceremony can and should be preserved at the evening dinner than is feasible at noon. The orderly sequence of courses and the careful serving have a part in adding to the dignity of the meal. These suggestions should not frighten the house-keeper who contemplates introducing the late dinner into their household. Very little extra work is involved in bestowing the touch of state referred to, and, after all, it consists chiefly in a slight additional care in waiting and serving, and to these the mistress can readily accustom the maid.— Christine Terhune Herrick, in Harper's Bazaar, 1890

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Community Etiquette at Hallowe'en

"Etiquette is all human social behavior. If you're a hermit on a mountain, you don't have to worry about etiquette; if somebody comes up the mountain, then you've got a problem. It matters because we want to live in reasonably harmonious communities." – Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners

Hallowe'en Pranks Went Beyond Common Decency

Some of the holiday pranks perpetrated to Red Bluff last night were not pranks at all—they are libelous and disgraceful demonstrations of vicious minds, and the perpetrators of these so-called jokes ought to be apprehended and prosecuted. The fact that we support a custom permitting people to go forth annually and make damphools of themselves doesn't justify the defacing of business fronts, the scratching of plate glass windows, insults to respectable and law abiding colored citizens, and other acts too disgraceful to enumerate. All these things happened in Red Bluff last night, and today many business men are suffering as a result of it. Even an old established, but insane, custom like Hallowe’en does not justify a community in forgetting its good manners. – Red Bluff Daily News, 1919

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Etiquette and Pilgrims' Meals

Pilgrim children usually stood at the table. Often they shared a plate. — "Willful waste brings woeful want and you may live to say, how I wish I had that crust that once I threw away." — Thomas Fuller

Pilgrim parents are strict with their children. Some of the rules sound familiar, like this one (from a book called The School of Manners) about speaking with your mouth full: 

When meat is in your mouth do not drink or speak or laugh — Dame Courtesy forbids.

But Pilgrim manners weren't always the same as ours. In their first years in America, they were too busy for regular meals. People just helped themselves right out of the cooking pot. They ate standing — in front of the fire, if the day was cold -— and then hurried off to work again.

When the family did eat together, the dinner table was often just some old boards laid on top of barrels. The cooking pot was placed in the middle, and the family gathered around.

Later, when the Pilgrims had more time —and more dishes — food was brought to the table on large, round platters called chargers. 

No one had his or her own plate. Instead, two people would share a trencher - a bowl carved or burned out of a block of wood.

A mother and father shared a trencher. Children shared, too. The Pilgrims thought that people who had their own trenchers were show-offs.

Some poor people didn't have wooden trenchers. Instead, they used pieces of stale bread as plates. They put the food on top of them, and after they ate the food, they ate the bread plates.

Almost nobody used forks. One Pilgrim, Governor John Winthrop, was given a fork as a present. It had only two times. The Pilgrims called it a "double dagger." 

They thought forks were silly. Why bother, they said, "Fingers were made before forks." —

 From "Eating the Plates" by L.R. Penner

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette and RSVPs

      

“Good breeding demands that an answer always be given to a question, unless the question be impertinent.” 

On Social Life and RSVPs

This week the question comes, “Is it necessary to send acceptance or regret to an invitation for a come and go reception?” Up to the present writing no definite answer to that particular question has been found in any books of etiquette that were accessible. However, perhaps a suggestion will be acceptable in lieu of a mere incontrovertible reply; and the suggestion is —“put yourself in her place.”


You have sent, out four hundred invitations bidding your friends come to you on a certain day or evening, you receive regrets from one hundred. Does that mean that three hundred are coming, or one-hundred-and-fifty, or in other words how many gallons of ice cream are you going to order; how much chocolate, or coffee or both shall you have made, and how many chickens, or lobsters, etc..., etc..., etc... ?


Mrs. J. Sherwood and various other authorities on the subject of social etiquette refer to the manner and style of wording acceptances or regrets to functions of one kind and another, as if the fact of answering in some way went without saying—it probably does. A matter of two minutes, a sheet of paper, envelope and postage stamp and the mailing is done. Why question it? Good breeding demands that an answer always be given to a question, unless the question be impertinent: why not then a reply to an invitation which is almost the least civility that can be paid to an invitation which is usually meant to be a courtesy?

Long before a stamped envelope and a reply card were added to wedding invitations, it was good manners to send a handwritten reply– “A matter of two minutes, a sheet of paper, envelope and postage stamp and the mailing is done. Why question it?” 

Mrs. Sherwood says: "In our new country the relations of men and women are necessarily simple. The whole business of etiquette is, of course, reduced to each one's sense of propriety, and the standard must be changed as the circumstances demand." Notwithstanding which, if you meet a friend in the street and she says: “I want you to meet some friends in my home such and such a time,'” you don't stand and stare at her, nor turn on your heel and leave her. Should not written invitations, even to a “come and go reception,” have as much attention as one given by word of mouth?
— Los Angeles Herald, 1895



Whether an answer's requested or not by the letters R.S.V.P. (repondez, sil vous plait—" answer, if you please"), it must be sent in a day or two, and written in the same formal style as the invitation, the acceptance of which may be thus expressed: "Mr. T. accepts with pleasure the polite invitation of Mrs. A. for the evening of _______ ."
A refusal should be written as follows: "Mr. T. regrets that he can not accept the polite invitation of Mrs. A. for the evening of ________."When an invitation is accepted, it must be, if possible, faithfully complied with. It is not seldom that an invited person takes an uninvited friend to a ball or evening dancing-party, but he ought not to do so without first asking permission of the giver of it. As he is not likely to be refused, he must hold himself entirely responsible for the character and conduct of his companion, who, previous to and after the party, should send a card. From “Bazar Book of Decorum” 1870

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

19th C. Italian Etiquette vs American... cont.

More on...

 "How Italians Educate Their Children:

A regimen which gives prominence to fine manners, free intercourse of the different classes in Italy, and why it pays to be polite."

I do not think that Mr. Jarves had any Italian offspring like Madoonna in mind when he wrote his 1880 article on Italian parenting and etiquette, but still, she is sending his message, "Italians do it better," all the same ~ The talent, or "smartness" which finds success in any chosen line is considered to be the most enviable quality children can show. Absorbed in their own business or pleasure, they are disinclined to make time, as do Italian and French fathers, to instruct and initiate their children in the customs and wisdom of the world, while winning their confidence in multiform sympathetic ways.

The sincerity of affection of American fathers for their children cannot be questioned, but the quality of its practical manifestation as a whole is open to comment. American fathers are too reserved and undemonstrative; two little given to intimate association with the joys, chagrins, and personal training of their children. From want of practice they do not know how, as do European fathers, to participate in their lives and become their confidential companions. They are over-solicitous to see them on an independent, self-made footing early in life, working out their own careers prematurely, in their separate responsibility, while relieving them of theirs in the matter.

The talent, or “smartness” which finds success in any chosen line is considered to be the most enviable quality children can show. Absorbed in their own business or pleasure, they are disinclined to make time, as do Italian and French fathers, to instruct and initiate their children in the customs and wisdom of the world, while winning their confidence in multiform sympathetic ways. A New-England father, cold and commanding in deportment, when not forgetful and indifferent; austere and abrupt and speech, if not taciturn and careless, bountifully provides the means of education, comfort, and entertainment of his offspring, and is prompt to enunciate Lycurgian rules and abstract apothegms for their guidance by already physically and mentally over-taxed mothers, or those whom he liberally pays to vicariously execute the most needful of his own duties, in the inculcation of those habits and principles on which the future welfare of his family depends. 

Hence, between American fathers and sons there is less free intercourse and affectionate courtesy, with intermingling of pleasures and interests, than in European families. Domestic life has more centrifugal than centripetal force. In infancy there is begotten a restraint which tinges all subsequent intercourse between them, and leaves uncomfortable associations on both sides. This state of domestic life is more a defect of the head than heart, chiefly arising from the neglect to cultivate those endearing habits and manners which should be the crowning grace of intellectual accomplishments and parental authority.

The tact with which cultivated Italians pay compliments is equal to their fastidious sense of personal beauty. Nothing elicits more heartfelt admiration than grace or brightness, particularly in children. The most common place are noticed, while any special attraction gets enthusiastically praised. Their quick eyes, even in adults, seize on any distinguishing feature, if it be only a well shaped ear or nose, or other minor organ, and cordially praise that, politely ignoring the homely ones out of consideration of the feelings of their possessor. Their aesthetic sympathies are so keen that they detect charms which untrained senses overlook. They are much less prone than Anglo-Saxons to see only defects and crudely condense them into one sweeping condemnation of absolute ugliness or badness, with no discrimination of mitigating or compensating details. 

In social intercourse they are less inclined to the superficial, impressive, and wholesale prejudices of people of coarser fibre and colder hearts, in regard to persons of unprepossessing appearance. Instead, they charitably discover something to recommend the most forbidding in looks, if, like themselves, well bred, while their respect to age is particularly commendable. Whether this conduct springs from charity of heart or policy of head, it is certainly good breeding. 

The habit of considering others sometimes brings unexpected results. There lived in Florence some years back and Irish painter of merit, who was on the verge of starvation from inability to sell his works. One evening as it so happened that the journal he had taken up at a café to distract him was asked for by a stranger. He immediately handed it to the inquirer, saying another would serve his purpose as well. This led to an acquaintance, which ended in his selling all of his Winter's work to his new friend, who was an amateur, and placing him at once in a comfortable position. 

Another more remarkable instance is the following: An elderly gentleman, partially paralyzed, was traveling by himself in a railway carriage, in which was a young lady, unknown to him. Accidentally dropping the newspaper he was reading, and finding it difficult to recover it, she promptly assisted him, following it up by other little services and pleasant conversation. When the train stopped she considerately assisted him out. He begged her address, which she gave him, and soon the incident faded out of her mind. 

A year afterward, to her astonishment, she received a letter from the old gentleman's lawyer with the intelligence that he had died, and bequeathed her $150,000, "because of her politeness to a stranger." This was indeed casting her bread of civility on the waters of life to some purpose, and forcibly illustrates the power of "politesse de coeur," as the French aptly designate this humane accomplishment.

Matthew Arnold defines civilization as the “humanizing of man in society.” Politeness is one of the most efficient agents in affecting this transmutation of human nature. Poetry, music, painting, and sculpture or even less direct agencies in its improvement, for polite manners are apostolic in their proselytizing functions. No supreme civilization is reached, however, on a single line of progress. To form a complete, well-rounded humanity, scope must be given to every healthful aspiration and no faculty left to lie dormant. The ideal race is yet to be created out of the perfections of all. Hebrewism has given us religion, the spiritual aspects of faith, sacrifice, obedience, duty, and worship as its supreme ideal; Hellenism, the might of philosophy, beauty, and mind in heroic guise of earthly mold; Rome, The power of unity and supremacy of law. 

Germany now proffers inquiry, scientific analysis, and thought; the Latin races, their sensitiveness to beautiful form and behavior; their delicacy of apprehension and technical touch; England, her broad eclecticism, practical skill, and resolute utilitarianism, while inventive, receptive America, the mosaic of nations, opens her doors with the impartial welcome to all but benign influences. Let us hope that humanities highest polish and finest amalgamation will finally be ours. But to secure, this something besides a deep-seated passion for beauty, abstract truth, or prosaic utility is required. 

Progress toward the ideal to be lasting, must be as deeply rooted in the heart as the head. It's complete code exists only in the divine principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ, who is the most beautiful manifestation of spirit in the flesh vouchsafed to men. He was the complete gentleman. His perfect brotherhood, gentleness, truth, sympathy, sacrifice, intuition, forbearance, courtesy, kindness to women and children; His energy, courage, and righteous anger; His devotion to His one great object, the alleviation of life's miseries, succor of the afflicted, healing of the sick, regeneration of all man; His exalted, purifying doctrines and practice- all this, combined with an aesthetic temperament that made Him, the most radical of reformers, enjoy nature and art, wear fine apparel, and come "eating and drinking;" a Saviour appreciating the refinements and blessings of life, not despising and fearing them like a misery-coveting, cowardly ascetic; this makes Jesus, after 18th centuries of example, still the "first gentleman" of all time, universal Teacher and ideal man of humanity. 

From “How Italians Train Their Youth,” an article originally published in the NY Times, sent from Florence, Italy, August 10, 1880, by James Jackson Jarves

🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette in Japan's Edo Era

Above: A page from the government-approved morals education textbook 'Watashitachi no Doutoku' ('Our Morals'), for 5th- and 6th-graders, describes behaviors said to be from the Edo Period. In recent years, many Japanese public schools have begun programs teaching Edo period etiquette to the students. The board of education in the city of Moriya, Ibaraki Prefecture, launched a pilot project to teach Moriya shigusa, which is inspired by Edo shigusa, to its elementary and junior high schools. The city has created a booklet that includes 24 “encouraged” behaviors to be used in its public elementary and junior high schools. US government officials in Japan during the Edo period noted the many differences in Western etiquette and Japanese etiquette; "Great inconveniences will of course be experienced by us in furnishing the necessary rooms and accommodations for so large an accession to our numbers, and especially when some will be of the highest rank, and therefore require special attention and conveniences; while all speak an unknown language, and are so unlike to ourselves in dress, in food and in manners. The Japanese, however, are distinguished for simplicity of manners, and simplicity with neatness in dress, and simplicity in diet..." Sources: Japan Times and New York Times

Jeddo, Saturday, Oct. 8, 1859

"You and your readers have been apprised long since, that, according to a provision in the treaty concluded by Mr. Harris between the United States and Japan in June, 1858, two Japanese Commissioners were to be sent to Washington in a national vessel, and at the expense of the United States, the object being to make a good impression upon the Japanese upon their first introduction into the comity of nations, and with whom the United States are destined to conduct an important commerce through the enterprise of our countrymen in California and Oregon. 

It was conditional in the treaty that the Commissioners should leave Japan on the 22d day of February; and as rumors were rife, and universally credited, that the Japanese would never fulfill the condition, it was necessary for Commodore Tatnall to visit Jeddo, and ascertain to a certainty whether the Commissioners would be ready to go at the appointed time, as also to urge an earlier day for their departure, in case they should go, since so much expense would be incurred, and discomfort experienced, by the officers and crew of the Powhatan, should their long-cherished hopes be blasted. For these reasons, leaving Shanghai Sept. 17, we cast anchor before the great and unknown City of Jeddo, Wednesday, Oct. 5, having stopped a few days at Nagasaki.

Daimyo were the most powerful feudal rulers from the 10th century to the middle 19th century in Japan, and were subordinate only to the Shogun. 

Having spent some days under the hospitable roof of Mr. Harris, I have learned all the particulars respecting the Commissioners and their future movements. There are two parties in Japan -- the Progressives and Old Fogies; the men who are attached to the institutions, the customs and the non-intercourse policy of their fathers; and others who see advantages in commerce and intercourse with other nations, or else think it is better to yield gracefully to circumstances, and freely do what they soon must do from necessity. The Emperor is always a mere cypher, and now is a boy only 16 years old, but in fact as important and influential as other Emperors, however venerable the age they attained. A Council of six members is selected from the hereditary princes, of whom there are 360, who are to the Japanese government very much what the House of Commons is to the English. The Emperor may select his Council of State from these Daimais (sic), or princes, and they may pursue the course they please, but unless it also pleases the Daimias, and they refuse to sanction it, the Emperor is obliged to dismiss them and appoint others.

Townsend Harris was a minor politician, a successful NYC merchant, and the first United States Consul General to Japan. He negotiated what is known as the "Harris Treaty" between the US and Japan. He is credited as the diplomat who first opened the Empire of Japan to culture and foreign trade during the Edo period in Japan, 1603-1868. After learning that the Japanese had a large group of men attending to them during the negotiations, Mr. Harris explained that American taste and etiquette are unlike Japanese, and that even our greatest men had no retinue so large.

When the treaty was proposed it encountered violent opposition in the Council, though it was finally sanctioned; while the majority of the Princes denounced it on all occasions, some of them declaring, as they touched their hands to the two swords which every one always carries, that it would be better to perish manfully, standing by the sacred institutions and policy of their fathers, than to open their beautiful and happy country to foreign nations, of whom they needed nothing, as centuries of seclusion had shown, when they had whatever immaterial things their wants required, and, besides, uninterrupted peace and safety. The Emperor, like Queen Victoria, was obliged to succumb to the tempest his Ministers had raised, and, dismissing them, appoint a new Board from the opposite party. Opposed, as the new Cabinet is, to the policy of the treaty, they feel obliged to observe it, which is a circumstance highly in commendation of their integrity; and when Mr. Harris inquired of them, the other day, at the request of Com. Tatnall, whether the two Commissioners would proceed to the United States under his flag, they replied that two new Commissioners had just been appointed, who would certainly be ready to embark at the specified time, but not sooner.

At first, 81 persons of different classes had been appointed to accompany them, of whom two were censors, or, in other words, spies upon the Commissioners, two lieutenant-governors, eight generals and colonels, two interpreters, or Japanese, who can speak Dutch, and perhaps some little English, two physicians, and forty servants. Mr. Harris told them that American taste and etiquette are unlike Japanese, and that even our greatest men had no retinue; so large a suite would, therefore, in no measure contribute to the honor of the Commissioners, but probably, on the contrary, would be an annoyance and disadvantage to them. They informed Mr. Harris that they had struck off ten from the list, and we earnestly hope that there will be a still greater reductio ab absurdo (or "reduction to absurdity".)

Great inconveniences will of course be experienced by us in furnishing the necessary rooms and accommodations for so large an accession to our numbers, and especially when some will be of the highest rank, and therefore require special attention and conveniences; while all speak an unknown language, and are so unlike to ourselves in dress, in food and in manners. The Japanese, however, are distinguished for simplicity of manners, and simplicity with neatness in dress, and simplicity in diet; and we hope to make a pleasant voyage with them across the Pacific to Panama, where they will cross the Isthmus and take passage in a vessel provided by the Government. In the meantime we shall be making our way around the Horn, and hope for a pleasant reunion with our Japanese friends on our own soil. May our country prove to be as interesting to them as theirs has been to us.

Leaving Jeddo in a few days, we shall run down to Shanghai and Hong Kong, and having taken in coal and provisions, return to this port, and, making all the necessary arrangements for the accommodation of the Japanese dignitaries and attendants, be ready to take a last farewell of Japan and its unequaled scenery on Feb. 22, at the first gleam of morning. We now seek the rising and not the setting sun."

Examples of Edo Era Etiquette in Japan

One example of Edo-style etiquette advocated is kasa kashige (umbrella-leaning), the practice by people passing others on a narrow street to tilt their umbrellas slightly away from each other to avoid getting others wet.

The compassion demonstrated in kasa kashige is at the root of Edo shigusa. But it’s not about imposing a certain behavior on people. . . . It’s about having the mind to care for others . . . (to) show compassion for others.

The merchant practice of kobushi ukase, which refers to the behavior of moving over on a bench to make space for others.

Proponents believe these traditions, which are not documented on paper and have been handed down only verbally, were on the brink of extinction until a man known for his pseudonym Mitsuakira Shiba, whose background is little known but who, legend has it, was a descendant of an Edo merchant, started a campaign to restore the Edo Period practices in the 1970s, based on what he had heard from his grandfather.

Some say Edo-style etiquette is not backed up by historical evidence, and that teaching such behavior as if it were a part of the nation’s history may distort Japanese moral education, which includes teaching not to lie to others.

“Lessons of Edo shigusa are indeed ethically sound . . . but that doesn’t mean they can tell a lie,” or otherwise children may mistakenly consider lying is OK as long as it is good for people, said Minoru Harada, an author and independent researcher of pseudohistory.

Source ~ Japan Times

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor  for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia.