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| Elbows on the Table Now Good Form?!? Etiquipedia thinks not! This article makes it very clear that the trend is fashionable only if you are young, wrinkle-free and have no physical defects. It also concedes that to lower one’s standards and damage one’s impression on others was probably due to the new fashions, which happened to be showing off the arms and elbows, though the author clearly is unsure if the fashions came first, or those with the elbows on the tables had inspired the new fashions. Sounds like a flimsy excuse for slouching to Etiquipedia… 🍽️ 🍽️ 🍽️ 🍽️ 🍽️ 🍽️ Pretty “poses” are even suggested for those who want to make unsightly elbows look nicer or show off ones rings.. Above you can see “The afternoon tea pose.” A pose for “Glancing through the menu” and the “Breakfast pose.” The article reads that previously: “… your table manners were excellent in proportion to the way you managed to keep your elbows out of sight. But fashions in manners change like everything else and today the elbow is everywhere in evidence. To lean on your elbows is the pose of the hour and it has the approval of the smart women who lunch in smart restaurants. It is, in fact, a restaurant pose, being much more popular in these public places than in the home.” How trendy! |
Without the aid of her elbows the modern woman would have a sorry time of it. She would be deprived of her mainstay; she would be ‘attitude–less.’ There is scarcely a moment of the day up to the formal dinner hour that the fashionable woman is not using her elbows as props, and she has grown so to depend on their support that she would be utterly helpless if she had to get on without resting on them, especially at table. Shocking as it may seem, fashion says it is permissible to put your elbows on the table.
Sometimes a woman does get an unexpected sight of herself as she sits in a restaurant where mirrors are plentiful, and the chances are that she is not particularly pleased with what she sees. The gown she thought fitted so admirably shows unfamiliar wrinkles and bunches and the position into which she has unconsciously fallen is by no means the one to show her off to the best advantage. And her elbows and arms! Surely she never dreamed they were so prominent and unpicturesque. But the mirror reveals them as they look to others and the thought is not pleasant.
There is character as well as grace and beauty in the way a woman leans on her elbows when sine knows how to manage them, and the character poses are frequently worth having conveyed to canvas. Some of them are artistie in every detail, and they are diffarer enough from the average ordinary pose to make the women who know enough to appreciate them eager to imitate thera. But it is better to be natural and individual, even if it is ever so little, than to look and be just like hundreds of other women, though it never pays for women to be eccentric.
There are many ways by which the owner of angular elbows can disguise this physical defect. She need not have the points exposed and she need not make them prominent. Chiffon and lace are wonderful aids in the hiding of unsightly elbows. The idea is that if elbows are to continue to occupy such a prominent position in society they should be educated and cultivated to the highest extent. – San Francisco Call, June 1907
How grieved those well bred women of the old school would be if they could, contrast this elbow period with the prim table manners of their day. What would they say if they could drop into some fashionable Fifth Avenue restaurant during luncheon or tea time and behold groups of smartly dressed women sitting with their elbows placed prominently on the table in front of them? They might be too polite to express their surprise, but at least they would be sure to think that modern manners had fallen from the old time standard.
Think of those days when to put your elbows on the table meant a sharp герrimand and maybe a curtailed dinner. You were taught then to sit at table with your hands primly folded in your lap when they were not engaged in manipulating knife and fork, or they were sedately clasped with the fingers barely resting on the edge of the snowy damask. That was the proper table etiquette so far as elbows and hands were concerned.
Think of those days when to put your elbows on the table meant a sharp герrimand and maybe a curtailed dinner. You were taught then to sit at table with your hands primly folded in your lap when they were not engaged in manipulating knife and fork, or they were sedately clasped with the fingers barely resting on the edge of the snowy damask. That was the proper table etiquette so far as elbows and hands were concerned.
Never were they permitted to display themselves, and as for using them as props, only persons without any breeding at all did that. Then your table manners were excellent in proportion to the way you managed to keep your elbows out of sight. But fashions in manners change like everything else and today the elbow is everywhere in evidence. To lean on your elbows is the pose of the hour and it has the approval of the smart women who lunch in smart restaurants. It is, in fact, a restaurant pose, being much more popular in these public places than in the home.
“Then why do women assume such awkward and unattractive poses when they lean on their elbows?” asked one woman who has learned to use her elbows as cleverly as she does a smile or a nod of the head. “There is no need of making a fright of yourself and emphasizing all your bad points, elbows included, when you are sitting at the luncheon table. You can look pretty and coquettish, young and graceful instead of angular and wrinkled when you lean on your elbows.
“Then why do women assume such awkward and unattractive poses when they lean on their elbows?” asked one woman who has learned to use her elbows as cleverly as she does a smile or a nod of the head. “There is no need of making a fright of yourself and emphasizing all your bad points, elbows included, when you are sitting at the luncheon table. You can look pretty and coquettish, young and graceful instead of angular and wrinkled when you lean on your elbows.
“Did you ever study. the women you see in restaurants?” went on this fair inquisitor. “Did you ever notice how the woman with a double chin rests her head in her palms when she puts her elbows on the table and thereby wrinkles her too full chin into a hundred unbecoming creases, and then she invariably turns the bad lines of her arms and hands to her vis-a-vis? That's a grave mistake and you say to yourself that she is stupid. And she is.
“She ought to know that when she has passed the youthful stage she ought to be mighty careful how she tampers with her chin and not only invites, wrinkles but exaggerates those she has already. Let her learn to touch just the tip of her chin if she will rest her head on her hands. The palm is always very warm, and this heat does not have a highly beneficial effect on the skin or complexion.
“Let women study the good lines of their hands. Very few of them realize that her hands are easier to tell a woman’s age by than her face. For one thing, they are generally allowed to grow old naturally. Very little care is given them in comparison with that lavished on the face and, despite well manicured nails and smooth skin, the telltale evidences are there. For instance, even young women have a series of wrinkles at the wrist on the outer side, and this is the side they invariably turn to the world, and they turn it when the hand is bent in such a position that the wrinkles look deeper and closer than they really are.
“Let women study the good lines of their hands. Very few of them realize that her hands are easier to tell a woman’s age by than her face. For one thing, they are generally allowed to grow old naturally. Very little care is given them in comparison with that lavished on the face and, despite well manicured nails and smooth skin, the telltale evidences are there. For instance, even young women have a series of wrinkles at the wrist on the outer side, and this is the side they invariably turn to the world, and they turn it when the hand is bent in such a position that the wrinkles look deeper and closer than they really are.
“A woman who smokes a cigarette in the part she plays on the stage, does it so daintily and gracefully that every woman in the audience then and there decides that cigarette smoking cannot be altogether bad.” The fair smoker looks so captivating that you forgive her the vice, if vice it is. When she was complimented one time on the graceful position in which she held the cigarette - it seemed to be a perfectly natural and careless one -she replied, “Don't you suppose I know it is graceful? Haven't I studied every line of the hand and fingers until I know how to get the best curves and poses?” And it was worth the time she took to learn the trick of smoking gracefully and prettily.
The elbow brigade ought to devote the same time and study to their poses. It is not necessary to sit with the shoulders hunched up until the blouse draws across the back and the waist line pulls itself out of place. Angular poses can and should be avoided. One of the favorite positions is to clasp the fingers and rest the head on the knuckles.
The elbow brigade ought to devote the same time and study to their poses. It is not necessary to sit with the shoulders hunched up until the blouse draws across the back and the waist line pulls itself out of place. Angular poses can and should be avoided. One of the favorite positions is to clasp the fingers and rest the head on the knuckles.
If the hands are allowed to follow out the arch thus formed they bring out clusters of wrinkles at the wrists and the line from elbow to elbow is so bad and so jarring that it would spoll the prettiest face smiling above it. But if the wrists are permitted to slip together, then the wrinkles disappear and the hands take on very graceful curves. This is what might be termed a conversational pose. About 10 out of every 12 women lunching in a restaurant will fall into this position when the menu has been planned and there is time for a pleasant chat.
A lot of fair lunchers have a little way of talking with their fingers when their heads are propped up by their elbows. The pose is an excellent one to show off one's collection of rings, and pretty fingers never look better than in the conversational pose. By the same token, ugly ones never look worse. If they are thin and scrawny they seem to overshadow arms and face almost to the extent of overshadowing the luncheon, and unless the nails are perfectly cared for their defects in manicuring proclaim themselves aloud.
For some reason it is not considered good form to rest the elbows on the table at dinner. The formality of the function does not harmonize with the informality of the pose, and so most women draw a line here. They may prop themselves up with their elbows at breakfast and at luncheon, in fact most of them sit through the entire meal with at least one elbow thus employed.
A lot of fair lunchers have a little way of talking with their fingers when their heads are propped up by their elbows. The pose is an excellent one to show off one's collection of rings, and pretty fingers never look better than in the conversational pose. By the same token, ugly ones never look worse. If they are thin and scrawny they seem to overshadow arms and face almost to the extent of overshadowing the luncheon, and unless the nails are perfectly cared for their defects in manicuring proclaim themselves aloud.
For some reason it is not considered good form to rest the elbows on the table at dinner. The formality of the function does not harmonize with the informality of the pose, and so most women draw a line here. They may prop themselves up with their elbows at breakfast and at luncheon, in fact most of them sit through the entire meal with at least one elbow thus employed.
They write with the left hand used as a support for the head and they read with their elbows occupying a prominent position. But at the dinner table, especially when it is a formal and dress affair, elbows are less in evidence, though it is a well known fact that a woman who possesses exquisitely molded arms displays them as much as she likes, even to putting them on the formal dinner table.
Since short sleeves came into vogue, the elbow fad has increased amazingly. The sleeves may be responsible for the elbow prop fad or the new use for the elbows may be responsible for the popularity of the short sleeve. Which ever way it is, the woman who wears short sleeves and her name is legion - rests her elbows on the table.
When Cleverness Counts
And here, again the clever woman shows her wisdom, for if her elbows are sharp and rough she has her sleeves made long enough to hide their ugliness. She of the Katisha elbow, the elbow that “people come miles to see,” can risk sleeves stopping above the bend of the arm without fear. But how many women are there possessing perfect elbows? Not many, to be sure, and since the elbow propping fad started these overworked members are not improving.
Since short sleeves came into vogue, the elbow fad has increased amazingly. The sleeves may be responsible for the elbow prop fad or the new use for the elbows may be responsible for the popularity of the short sleeve. Which ever way it is, the woman who wears short sleeves and her name is legion - rests her elbows on the table.
When Cleverness Counts
And here, again the clever woman shows her wisdom, for if her elbows are sharp and rough she has her sleeves made long enough to hide their ugliness. She of the Katisha elbow, the elbow that “people come miles to see,” can risk sleeves stopping above the bend of the arm without fear. But how many women are there possessing perfect elbows? Not many, to be sure, and since the elbow propping fad started these overworked members are not improving.
It cannot improve elbows to use them constantly as supports for the head and body. When the weight of the trunk in addition to that of the head is thrown on the elbows it is bound to make them grow hard and rough. Nine-tenths of the women of today have callous spots of more or less size and prominence on their elbows. These might be got rid of entirely or kept inconspicuous if a little time were devoted to them.
How many women think of rubbing cold cream on their elbows or massaging them, or paying them any attention whatever? Very few, indeed, and yet it would be well worth while. A woman never sees her own elbows, and that is one reason why she spends so little time on their care. With nightly applications of cold cream, followed by judicious rubbing and patting, unattractive elbows can be vastly improved, and then If the owner of these elbows will spend some time before a mirror trying various poses she will see what it means to make the most of her elbows.
Sometimes a woman does get an unexpected sight of herself as she sits in a restaurant where mirrors are plentiful, and the chances are that she is not particularly pleased with what she sees. The gown she thought fitted so admirably shows unfamiliar wrinkles and bunches and the position into which she has unconsciously fallen is by no means the one to show her off to the best advantage. And her elbows and arms! Surely she never dreamed they were so prominent and unpicturesque. But the mirror reveals them as they look to others and the thought is not pleasant.
There is character as well as grace and beauty in the way a woman leans on her elbows when sine knows how to manage them, and the character poses are frequently worth having conveyed to canvas. Some of them are artistie in every detail, and they are diffarer enough from the average ordinary pose to make the women who know enough to appreciate them eager to imitate thera. But it is better to be natural and individual, even if it is ever so little, than to look and be just like hundreds of other women, though it never pays for women to be eccentric.
There are many ways by which the owner of angular elbows can disguise this physical defect. She need not have the points exposed and she need not make them prominent. Chiffon and lace are wonderful aids in the hiding of unsightly elbows. The idea is that if elbows are to continue to occupy such a prominent position in society they should be educated and cultivated to the highest extent. – San Francisco Call, June 1907
🍽️Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia
