Princess Housekeeping Etiquette

According to author, Florence Hartley, “If neatness, consistency, and good taste, preside over the wardrobe of a lady, expensive fabrics will not be needed; for with the simplest materials, harmony of color, accurate fitting to the figure, and perfect neatness, she will always appear well dressed.” But, according to news reports, Princesses of the Victorian Era were doing some sewing themselves. Expensive fabrics may have then been the order of the day, as Princess wardrobes require finer fabrics.

“Not so very many years ago, it would have been looked upon as a terrible breach of etiquette, on the Continent at least, for a Princess to be taught such useful things as cooking and dress-making. But nowadays, all that is changed, and there are not many Royal ladies, especially in Germany, who have not been thoroughly instructed in all that pertains to housekeeping down to its minutest details.” – The Marin Journal, 1899

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Royal Shopping Etiquette

                                  

Depiction of Harrod's in the 19th Century — Royal tradition ended in 2000, with the removal of royal warrants, and after the death of Princess Diana. Harrods severed its commercial links with the Royal Family by removing warrants from its prestigious shopfront. Workmen have taken down the warrants, which show that the Royals buy goods from the store, from outside the Knightsbridge building. The Royal seal of approval was also removed from the store's vans, marking the end of a 62-year tradition.

Poor Queen - She Can Take Only One Shopping Trip Every Year!

LONDON (UPI)—Queen Elizabeth II likes to have what she calls “a really good poke” 'round everything on the one time a year when she goes shopping—for Christmas presents. Court etiquette prevents her from going out to buy anything except Christmas gifts. Everything else is sent to the palace for her to choose from. So the Queen always looks forward eagerly to her annual expedition to a famous store (Harrods) in the London district of Knightsbridge, near Buckingham Palace, for the pleasure in which other women take as a matter of course. 

She writes her gift list weeks in advance, makes secret inquiries as to tastes, and adds Prince Phillip's gifts to her own. Her Lady-in-Waiting telephones the store manager to say when she is arriving. “No publicity, please,” is the strict rule. One Christmas the newspapers described the toys the Queen had bought. Her eldest children, Prince Charles and Princess Anne, discovered what they were to receive three weeks in advance. This year the queen has a special gift for them.

She is having a “teen-age rumpus room” made in the Victoria Tower of Windsor Castle, which the royal family uses as a weekend home. The sound-proof room will have television, hi-fi equipment, a tape recorder and rugs that can be removed for dancing sessions. It is due to be inaugurated formally with a teen-age cocktail party when Prince Charles, 16 and Princess Anne 14, arrive home for the holidays from Gordonstoun and Benenden Schools, respectively. Normally the Queen has a big house party at her country home at Sandringham during Christmas but this year renovations are in process there, so the royal family will spend Christmas at Windsor. 

It is celebrated in the traditional English manner, with a Yule log burning in the hearth and the rooms decorated with holly, mistletoe and pale Christmas roses. Dinner is the same every year —roast turkey with sausages and chestnut stuffing, sprouts and carrots, followed by hot mince pie and plum filled Christmas pudding. There's fruit, candy and crackers, which are pulled. The hats they contain are put on by everybody. The Christmas dinner is served at 1:00 p.m. instead of in the evening, so all the children over seven can be present. Those under that age eat upstairs in the nursery suite, but come down during the afternoon for the children’s party. 

The brilliantly decorated and illuminated Christinas tree is ceremoniously revealed at dusk in the ballroom when the double doors are flung open. There is a gift from everyone in the building. The Queen distributes the packages, such things as socks or china for her staff and servants, puzzles and jokes for the royal family. They exchange their personal gifts on Christmas Eve, just before carol singers come into the hall to sing the Christmas hymns. The Queen and all the Royal family join in. On Christmas morning, everyone attends church and Prince Philip customarily reads the Scripture lesson. – The Desert Sun, December 1964

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Edward Forgave American Solecisms

One successful American in Edwardian era London promoted himself ~ In 1906, following a vacation to London, American businessman, the savvy and brash, Harry Gordon Selfridge, returned to England and invested £400,000 in his own department store. Built in what was then the “unfashionable” western end of Oxford Street, the store opened in 1909 to the public, and his 20-year leadership of “Selfridges” led to his becoming one of the most respected and wealthy retail magnates in the United Kingdom. He was known as the “Earl of Oxford Street.” Sadly, his solecisms and downfall were to follow, from lavish spending, gambling debts and affairs with showgirls.

“The social promoter abroad, whether male or female, is not always the happiest of mortals. The recent disaster which befell some Americans who trusted too much to the savoir faire of their sponsor in London has produced disastrous results. English society is still a stickler, and the rumor that a gentleman and his wife, trusting to an American in London, who has had some position, in engineering them through, committed some kind of solecism, being present at a ball at Buckingham Palace without previously having been presented, has been the talk of the clubs this week. However, the matter is much more serious from the point of an American in London, than otherwise. Very few Americans have been honored with invitations to state balls at Buckingham Palace, which are very stupid functions and empty honors at best.

King Edward is very liberal in his ideas, especially toward Americans, but extremely narrow where his own subjects are concerned. He has been known to send to Coventry, men of prominence—and women, too, for that matter—for very slight breaches of etiquette. But he is most lenient in the case of people from this side. There is reason to believe, in the present story as retailed, that there is a slight animus in the American colony in London. However, the incident bears fruit, and Americans who go to London for social recognition there, are becoming more and more wary of the promoter who has not been in favor recently. The social promoter is not unknown in New York, and there has existed in late years, a certain prejudice against him. The male promoter is disappearing, and the man who can secure a comparatively unknown person membership in exclusive clubs is becoming rarer each day. Ten years ago there were many such men, members of the most fashionable New York clubs. Today there are strong local prejudices to fight, and Wall Street is often a factor.” –The Los Angeles Herald, 1904

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Budget Debutante Etiquette

All of the Court gowns have many similar features. Unmarried young women must appear in white. The gown must have a train not less than two yards in length and must be cut moderately low in the neck, and the sleeves must be short. A veil similar to that worn by a bride must also form a part of the costume. A bouquet of flowers is also a compulsory feature...

The London Season... At Cut Rate Prices

One girl who was presented last year, boasted of having passed through the ordeal at a cost of less than $50! She managed it by hiring a gown and veil for $30, borrowing some jewels, paying $10 for a carriage and $10 for a bouquet of flowers. It is possible to do it for $175 without hiring or borrowing anything. A fair gown can be had for $125, the veils, slippers, gloves, etc., for $25 more, leaving $25 for the carriage and flowers. This, of course, is shaving matters dangerously close. Usually, the parents of a girl who is presented, give a reception at their hotel or home after the drawing room, and this has grown to be such a fixed custom, that the cost must be reckoned the same as the price of the Court gown. 

All of the Court gowns have many similar features. Unmarried young women must appear in white. The gown must have a train not less than two yards in length and must be cut moderately low in the neck, and the sleeves must be short. A veil similar to that worn by a bride must also form a part of the costume. A bouquet of flowers is also a compulsory feature, but aside from these, the young woman can allow her fancy to run as freely as her pocketbook will permit. It is the Lord Chamberlain who fixes all these rules, and his assistants see to it that they are rigorously adhered to. – London (UP),1896

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Royal Etiquette for Afghan Prince

In 1895 the Emir Abdur Rahman Khan had intended to undertake a state visit to England, but his health prevented him from making the trip, and so he sent his son the Shahzada Nasrullah Khan, in his place. Nasrullah departed Bombay on April 29, 1895, with a group of priests for the observance of religious functions and high-ranking Afghan nobles – an entourage which totaled over 90. On May 23 the Shahzada landed at Portsmouth in England. He was received by the Queen at Windsor Castle, and during his trip he made a gift of £2,500 to Abdullah Quilliam to support the work of the Liverpool Muslim Institute, visited the Liverpool Overhead Railway, went to Ascot, Glasgow, and the Elswick Company Gun Range at Blitterlees Banks.

All who know Afghanistan were well convinced that neither the ruler, nor his heir apparent would leave their native country. As a matter of courtesy the invitation was addressed to the Ameer and the latter accepted it, “health permitting,” but from the first, all who are posted on the subject were confident that the Ameer would not leave Cabul. It was, however generally believed that the eldest son would represent his father, and it was somewhat of a disappointment when it was announced that the second son— who, by the way, is the child of a slave woman – would visit the capital of his father’s ally. Considerable difficulty as to the etiquette to be observed was felt, and until about a week before the Prince’s arrival it had not been settled how he was to be styled. As everything, however, has been smoothed over, the authorities are seeking to impress upon the young Afghan, the greatness of the British Empire, and by this means to confirm the Ameer to his preference for Great Britain over his near neighbor, Russia.

From the moment the young Prince— he is only 23 years of age— set foot on British soil he was received in right royal form and with every possible distinction. Addresses innumerable have been presented to him. He has been received by the highest officials everywhere, and his journey here was one long series of receptions. The Prince, as already stated, brought with him a large suite and detachment of Afghan troops. Being a Mohammedan, the religious peculiarities of the Moslem have had to be taken into consideration. Among his attendants are a number of cooks to prepare their leader’s food in accordance with Moslem customs. He has also in attendance upon him Colonel Talbot of the Foreign Department of the Indian Government, and T. A. Martin, the Afghan agent. Throughout his six weeks’ stay in this country the Prince will be received as the Shahzada (son of a King). He is attended by Royal escorts, has been received by the Queen, is received by Royalty, and will, in fact, have a Royal progress until his departure. – San Francisco Call, 1895

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia  

Etiquette of Royal Court Precedency

Consuelo Spencer-Churchill, Duchess of Marlborough, was a member of the prominent American Vanderbilt family. Her marriage to Charles Spencer-Churchill, 9th Duke of Marlborough became an international symbol of the socially advantageous, but loveless, “Dollar Princess” marriages, which were so common during the Gilded Age.

The new Duchess of Marlborough takes the lead in the order of precedency at Court. According to English Court etiquette, women take the same rank as their husbands or brothers. The order of precedency is as follows down to Dukes: The Sovereign, the Prince of Wales, the Queen's younger sons, grandsons of the Sovereign, Archbishop of Canterbury, the Lord High Chancellor, Archbishop of York, Lord President of the Council, the great Lord Chamberlain, the Earl Marshal. 

The last four named rank above all peers of their own degree; Dukes according to their patent of creation (1, Dukes of England; 2, of Scotland; 3, of Great Britain; 4, of Ireland). 

The following is the date of creation of twelve of the twenty-two Dukes:

• Marlborough, 1702; 
• Brandon, 1711:
• Portland, 1716;
• Manchester, 1719;  
• Newcastle 1756; 
• Northumberland, 1766; 
• Cumberland 1799;
• Wellington, 1814; 
• Sutherland, 1833; 
• Westminster, 1874; 
• Fife, 1889; and 
• Argyll, 1892

                         From the San Francisco Call, 1895

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia  

Suffering Etiquette of Victoria’s Table

Dinner with Queen Victoria could be quite trying... “The etiquette is, do not open your mouth unless Royalty condescends to speak to you. Do not expect such a compliment. That is reserved for a few favored guests in the immediate vicinity of the regal hostess. The dinner occupies from sixty to ninety minutes, and, when ended, the Queen rises, all other ladies rising and retiring with her.” –1862

When Dining with a Queen

The London correspondent of the Philadelphia Press gives the following description of a dinner at Windsor Castle, with Queen Victoria:

At this season, except that fashion is slightly less bustling in Lent, London is generally very much alive— taking its tone from the Court. Queen Victoria’s little dinners always draw a certain number of invited - no, commanded guests; for the etiquette is, not that Royalty requests the pleasure of one's company, but orders it, indeed, for very autocratical is the system, that supposing you have arranged to give a dinner to a number of your own friends, and received a card from the Lord Chamberlain of the Queen’s household, desiring you to dine, on the same day, at the Queen’s table, there is no refusing on any other plea than that of positive illness. 

Not to go would be a sort of petty treason, and you would have to send a circular round to your own guests, stating that the Queen’s command, compelling you to dine at the palace, has compelled you to uninvite them. Nor, except the honor and glory of the thing, can there be much comfort or satisfaction in having one’s legs under the Royal mahogany. First of all, the guest must put himself into a Court dress, which makes him look like a footman in private life, with knee breeches and silk stockings, lace cravat and ruffles, amplest of waistcoats and shad bellyist of coats. Then, if he does not keep his own coach he must hire one looking like a private vehicle, for it is doubtful whether, since creation commenced, any one ever walked to a Royal dinner, and the idea of going thither in a cab would probably have a moral effect on the enormous porter, in scarlet and gold toggery, who receives your card of invitation when he admits you. 

Nor, supposing all the preliminary trouble ended — supposing that you have found your way to the drawing-room, and bowed to the Queen, and stealthily looked round at the pictures, and counted over (all the time in solemn silence) the spots of flowers on the carpet, for the tenth time, and marched in file into the salle a manger — supposing all this, do not imagine that you are going to enjoy yourself. No, indeed. None but Mark Tapley could be “jolly” at such a feast. Royalty has already dined, about 3 o'clock, probably off the hereditary leg of mutton and turnips, and has added the usual quantum of rice pudding, and the bit of old Cheshire, or rich Stilton, or double Glouster cheese, and imbibed the accustomed mug or two of Guinness or Meux. This repast, called lunch, is really a good, homely filling of dinner, and at the solemn repast, five hours later, people are expected to merely tip and taste through several courses, so that one is reminded of the famous feast of the Barmecide. 

The viands are of the best, the cuisine perfect, the vintages superb — but one can merely taste. Royalty’s appetite was blunted on the leg of mutton and pudding, the cheese and the bottled porter, and the guests should have taken the edge off theirs by a similar process. At these sadly solemn reunions dull silence grimly reigns. There is not even a whisper to your neighbor — if you know him. The etiquette is, do not open your mouth unless Royalty condescends to speak to you. Do not expect such a compliment. That is reserved for a few favored guests in the immediate vicinity of the regal hostess. The dinner occupies from sixty to ninety minutes, and, when ended, the Queen rises, all other ladies rising and retiring with her. The male guests remain some ten minutes longer, silently sipping their wine, or whispering in small knots with bated breath. 

At last the senior officer of the household present, rises on his hind legs and majestically gives “the Queen” as a toast, which every one drinks. It any male member of the Royal family be present, he bows an acknowledgment. Coffee follows, and then the guests depart— a few to the drawing room where the Maids of Honor are yawning, the rest going home, where it is supposed each man gets out of his livery, at once, and gets rid of his gnawing hunger by means of oysters and stout. Such, I am informed by one who experienced it, is the routine of a royal dinner. He was an East Indian, and suffered much . – Daly Alta California, 1862

🍽Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J Graber of The RSVP Institute of Etiquette, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia 

Etiquette and Polite Policing

The manual, “Courteous Selective Enforcement” takes its text from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy.” Gibbons says he is going to keep drumming at it until his men are as polite as a Bobbie at the gates of Buckingham Palace.

Courtesy Kick Irks Police In Philadelphia 

The city's policemen have given their new etiquette book a whirl and now, many of them say, they feel like a bather who wades ashore and finds that someone has taken his clothes. Issued at the bidding of Police Commissioner, Thomas J. Gibbons, the manual aims to refine police behavior, purify the cops' language: introduce at least a bit more patience; and improve his posture. “Please” and “thank you” are musts in the new vocabulary from have been expurged all coarse phrases, withering insults, juicy hyperbole, and richly elaborate sarcasms addresses to erring motorists.

The manual, “Courteous Selective Enforcement” takes its text from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy.” Gibbons says he is going to keep drumming at it until his men are as polite as a Bobbie at the gates of Buckingham Palace. The book was thrown at the cops after the commissioner's office got a flock of complaints that many policemen were too quick to make arrests at intersections, grabbing drivers for going ahead on the amber signal; and that “wholesale ticketing” was coupled with insults and rough talk generally. – Philadelphia (UP), 1957

Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia