Delineator's "Lessons in Etiquette"

It could be called tact... If you know a fat girl with a slim sister, always mistake the fat one for the slim one, and vice versa. 

• When a lady gives you her seat in a street car, thank her, but in such a manner that she will not be emboldened to open a conversation with you. 
• Going down the aisle of a theater allow the lady to precede you, unless you are attending the play alone. In that case you go first. 
• When some one calls you by phone and says: "Do you know who is talking?" and you answer that you do not, and the person continues to ask if you don't or can't guess, utter a joyous peal of laughter and say you know it is the sanitarium. Then hang up the receiver. 
• If you are walking along the street, carrying packages in both hands, and meet a lady who speaks to you, hold the packages in your teeth while you lift your hat to her. 
• If you know a fat girl with a slim sister, always mistake the fat one for the slim one, and vice versa. 
• When waltzing with a lady who steps upon your toes, it is nice, if you have a wooden leg, to keep the foot of that leg where she will step upon it oftenest. You can do this unobtrusively with a little practice. — The Delineator, 1910

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